Kelly Kelly has just issued a reply to Randy Orton's apology today to Kelly Kelly.
First, as background, here's what Orton said on Twitter: ""Yesterday I got caught up in a live radio interview and brought Kelly's personal life into it. I owe Kelly K and apology. The fact that she has dated a few guys I work with doesn't make her a bad person, and is also none of my or anyone else's business. Yesterday I got caught up in a live radio interview and brought Kelly's personal life into it. It was completely uncalled for. Kelly, I hope one day you can forgive me. I do however understand if that doesn't happen. Please everyone, trash me all you want, but please drop this topic out of respect for Barb."
Kelly just fired back: "I do not accept Orton's apology. He has a tiny ---- and that's not the only reason I didn't sleep with him. I heard he's selfish in bed, doesn't make eye contact, and rolls over and cries as soon as he orgasms, leaving the women he's with wondering what just happened... [CONTINUE READING]
In a shocking development for TNA staff, Canadian officials have declared that all broadcasts of Impact Wrestling are illegal on all channels in their country.. The reason for the ban, although unsurprising to anybody who has heard it, still has caused no end of grief to the people running Total Nonstop Action Wrestling. According to the Canadian government, TNA Wrestling has attempted to gain new viewers with false or misleading advertising, constituting a breach of the public trust.
"While it's all good and well for a company to put the word 'wrestling' in their name because they happen to center their shows in that kind of setting, it's an entirely different thing to declare that a show is going to be about wrestling, and then barely deliver any of the aforementioned product," said a government official, asking not to be named...[CONTINUE READING]
Currently, PWPotato's investigative staff is working on the following stories:
-Jeff Jarrett plans to divorce Karen, marry Linda Hogan, and adopt Nick and Brooke. Plans to sing duets with Brooke including a remix of "With My Baby Tonight" and feud with Hulk Hogan.
-Matt Hardy upset that other washed up wrestlers learning how to use web cams to keep their name in the news, feeling he is being crowded out
-Eric Bischoff hoping to see another improvement in Impact ratings from 1.1 last quarter to 1.1 this quarter so he can brag once again about the success of recent changes...[CONTINUE READING]
C.M. Punk is already accepting booking starting in August for various indy promotions. He is going to be wrestling under the name Punk M.C., citing the precedent by WWE to rename Bryan Danielson "Daniel Bryan."
"I considered 'See 'Emp Unk' also, inspired by the great indy success of U-Gene and Kev Inash," but I decided rather skirt copyrights with the tried and true "Phonetic Workaround," I'd to go with the approach my trusted friend Brian took, known on the Indy scene as the 'Sneaky Switcheroo,'" Punk tells The Potato in this inclusive interview. "I also considered just going by the name 'Punk,' inspired by Christopher Daniels going by just 'Daniels,' but that hasn't worked out well for him."
Sin Cara, who does not talk on WWE TV due to not knowing much English, will be holding a press conference on Thursday to further detail his plans for Ring of Honor.
In a press release, he stated: "I am happy to understand that I have purchased ROH Wrestling. My English is not so good, and I was at first unfamiliar with the Americanized version of the spelling of my name - Sin Clair. So for a while I did not know I owned the company. I am excited in my free time to book matches and design masks for this new adventure"... [CONTINUE READING]
Monday -TNA has been hard at work at a new name change, and has assigned Vince Russo to come up with something that sounds classier. After hours of hard work, he emerged from his office with the company name “Total Impact Title Society” (TITS). Word is, he tried to name the organization NIPPLES, but couldn’t think of two words that started with the letter “P”.
Tuesday - Rumors were spreading of a class action harassment lawsuit of 1.2 million people being sought against TNA that could have wide ranging effects on the organization. Apparently the case was dropped by the defendants after the shows 1.2 million viewers no longer felt harassed after turning off their television.
Wednesday - In other lawsuit news, former TNA Knockout Daffney is suing the company because of unfair pay, being injured on the job, and brain trauma after trying to make sense of the last show she appeared on...[CONTINUE READING]
Vince McMahon apologized to media gathered at the weekly post-Raw press conference for "one of the biggest mistakes he's ever made."
McMahon confided to the reporters that he threw the big tribute for The Rock tonight because he thought Rock had killed Osama Bin Laden last night.
"We would have never gone so overboard in our tribute to him just because it was his 38th birthday," McMahon said. "I mean, Rock's a big star and everything. His movie did great this weekend. He is perhaps the single most charismatic star in WWE history. But he didn't exactly kill the most hated man in America, and that celebration was designed for someone like that."
Rock bashfully walked into the press conference at that point. He looked at the reporters and shrugged. "They told me they had some surprises for me," he said. "But by the end of the show, I was thinking something odd was going on. I mean, this was a...[CONTINUE READING]
After two years of right-wingers, mostly those who don't like taking orders from some black guy from Hawaii, demanding that President Obama produce his birth certificate to prove he was really an American even though he doesn't look like one to them, he did so.
TNA executive Eric Bischoff, who moonlights as a right-wing nutjob on his Facebook page, posted the following today:
"Obama CREATES CONTROVERSY with his arrogant refusal to produce a birth certificate during the Presidential election. He is FORCED to produce it when polls suggest most think he may not be a citizen, then blames the controversy on "carnival barkers". In the meantime- Syria is on fire, there is no policy in Libya (although we are fighting there) and the economy continues to tank. I hear a fiddle and smell smoke."[CONTINUE READING]
-In preparation for his upcoming main event match against The Rock at WrestleMania 28, John Cena has apparently been training, and is planning to implement a new move into his arsenal. "The suplex, 5 Knuckle Shuffle, Side Slam, Attitude Adjustment, and STF have served me well for years, but it's time to step my game up a little. If I'm going to face The Great One at WrestleMania, I have to be at my best," Cena confessed to PWPotato in a recent interview. He goes on to mention that the 5 Knuckle Shuffle is nothing more than just a fancy punch, thus should not be counted with the new infamous "Five Moves of Doom." There has been no word yet on what the move will be, but Cena hopes to have it ready in time for WrestleMania 28.
-Recently released TNA wrestler Jay Lethal has reportedly been approached by WWE for a short term deal, but was told that due to the PG image of WWE, he would be forced to change his name to Jay Legal, and wouldn't immediately be put in a feud with JTG of Cryme Tyme...[CONTINUE READING]
STAMFORD, CONN. - Last week on Monday Night Raw, Adam "Edge" Copeland announced he was to retire effective immediately due to lingering neck issues that prevented him from ever being cleared by WWE to wrestle again. However, PWPotato.com was able to learn exclusively via leaked conference call amongst high-ranking WWE officials that Copeland has been re-instated to WWE programming and suspended from retirement.
During his retirement announcement Monday, Edge explained that because of his spinal fusion surgery eight years ago that required his throat being moved over, a plate being placed in his neck, as well as screws, that "I knew I was wrestling on borrowed time from that point on"...[CONTINUE READING]
STAMFORD, CT - Last week on Monday Night Raw, Adam "Edge" Copeland announced he was to retire effective immediately due to lingering neck issues that prevented him from ever being cleared by WWE to wrestle again. However, PWPotato.com was able to learn exclusively via leaked conference call amongst high-ranking WWE officials that Copeland has been re-instated to WWE programming and suspended from retirement.
During his retirement announcement Monday, Edge quipped that because of his spinal fusion surgery eight years ago that required his throat being moved over, a plate being placed in his neck, as well as screws, that "I knew I was wrestling on borrowed time from that point on."
That reference of the now-outlawed word in WWE, "wrestling" has prompted Vince McMahon to abide by his newly, internally-implemented standards and practices policy where a...[CONTINUE READING]
Wrestling fans remained skeptical yesterday over unconfirmed reports that Total Nonstop Action Wrestling is holding a pay-per-view event this Sunday.
Other than some scarce sightings of promotional literature for an event called “Lockdown,” there is little evidence to support rumors that TNA is holding an televised, live event priced at nearly $40 this Sunday night.
“That can’t be right. You must be thinking about WrestleMania. That was a couple weeks ago,” wrestling fan Gerry Gonzalez of Bronx, N.Y. said. “Trust me. If there was a wrestling pay per view going on this week, I’d know"... [CONTINUE READING]
L.A. Laker All-Star Kobe Bryant cited Michael Cole as his inspiration for his anti-gay slur directed toward an NBA referee this week.
"I just love Michael Cole's heel character," said Kobe to a small gathering of reporters after practice this afternoon. "Cole has really revitalized my interest in WWE. I saw his Twitter post where he called a colleague of his a 'f-ggot' and I thought that was a great way to generate ratings headed into the playoffs. As the Lakers, some fans might want to cheer us because we're winners. We want the crowd to turn totally against us and root against us throughout the playoffs. It's a strategy to get people watching us on TNA in these early rounds"... [CONTINUE READING]
Vince McMahon announced today additional business initiatives that he believes won't necessarily help profitability, but will shed him and his family of the perpetual shame they feel for being seen as making their fortune off of the "pro wrestling business."
McMahon not only changed the name of the company from World Wrestling Entertainment to WWE, as announced earlier today, but he also canceled all future WrestleManias and has banned self-identified "pro wrestling fans" from all WWE events.
"From now on, members of the WWE Universe must sign a pledge before entering any WWE live events that vows that they recognize that they are 'sports entertainment fans' and part of the 'WWE Universe' but not 'fans of wrestling,'" stated WWE in its latest press release. "Any person attempting to enter a live event without taking the oath and answering the questions the proper way and disavowing being a 'pro wrestling fan' will be turned away at the door. Refunds will not be offered... [CONTINUE READING]
After Kurt Angle discovered some people will buy anything, he's now claiming everything stupid he does is the result of "being hacked."
Last week Kurt Angle accused WWE wrestlers on WrestleMania 27 of stealing his moves, such as the anklelock (first used in the WWF by Ken Shamrock before Angle went pro).
Angle became the laughing stock of the WWE locker room, taking bullets from Randy Orton and C.M. Punk, who made pointed, accurate, scathing rebuttals to Angle's nonsense... [CONTINUE READING]
Since June of last year, now-WWE Champion The Miz and Alex Riley have been all but inseperable. Since The Miz began to mentor Riley on Season 2 of NXT, Riley and The Miz have been seen together quite often. According to Riley, Miz was even the best man at his wedding.
Upon losing a match that required The Miz to dismiss Riley as his apprentice/lackey/make-up-another-description-because-the-author-is-too lazy, it seemed like that link would be severed. However, the following week, Riley was once again with The Miz, this time as the Miz's Vice President of Corporate Communications. Although The Miz simply exploited a loophole in the match stipulation in order to keep Riley by his side, some have seen Riley's position as an indication for a job opportunity... [CONTINUE READING]
It was reported last night that riots broke out in the streets of Bedrock. The ringleader of these riots, Fred Flinstone, has demanded that the Great One himself, the Rock, be arrested and prosecuted for libel.
"It's just not right what he's been saying about us," Mr. Flinstone said while addressing a blood-thirsty mob. "He needs to come on down to Bedrock so I can shove a dinosaur bone up his candy ass!"
Mr. Flintstone's daughter, Pebbles, could be seen bawling her eyes out while wearing the new bright red John Cena t-shirt... [CONTINUE READING]
PWPotato has learned that WWE.com has a feature planned for for tomorrow featuring WWE Superstars admitting they forgot certain things when they were so wrapped up in WrestleMania hype.
Triple H will admit that until he was reminded on Monday, he forgot that he wrestled Undertaker once before at WrestleMania.
The Rock forgot until this morning that he is a movie star and a much bigger deal than John Cena; he also forgot until this weekend how much he disliked WWE politics and head games...... [CONTINUE READING]
Inspired by WWE announcing a match a year ahead of time, TNA has announced matches for an entire show a year in advance.
"We are always looking for ways to one-up our competition," said TNA President Dixie Carter. "WWE has a four-sided ring. We had a six-sided ring. WWE brought back a big star last month in The Rock. We countered with Sting and Hulk Hogan. They have the sledgehammer. We have the barbed wire baseball bat. They do one run-in and ref bump per pay-per-view. We do at least six. And now they've announced one match for one year from now. We're announcing ten. We are very proud that we continue to find ways to serve our fans by topping WWE in every way possible."
Here is the lineup:
10. Crimson vs. Amazing Red: Loser has to change their name to a different color.
9. Gunnar vs. Murphy: Winner gets to change their name to something marketable.
8. Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle: Loser Goes to Rehab and gets to pick three other members of the roster also desperately in need of rehab to go with them... [CONTINUE READING]
Special thanks to Vince Russo, Vince McMahon, The Shockmaster, Dan Quayle, The Hardys, Poopy Jokes, and Big Egos and Blowhards Everywhere.
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DEFINITION: "POTATO"
(verb) In pro wrestling, to "potato" someone is to strike them for real, usually unintentionally, most often done by a green, careless, tired, or chemically impaired wrestler; sometimes done on purpose to settle a score or send a message (or because you're a bully.)
