After watching WWE Films produce "See No Evil," "The Marine," "12 Rounds," "Behind Enemy Lines 3," "The Marine 2," "Legendary," "Knucklehead," and "The Chaperone," it's clear that it's time to move in a different direction. We here at PWPotato support WWE in all of their future endeavors and we have a "glass is half full" attitude. WWE should capitalize off past movies that were successful by re-making them starring their awe-inspiring superstars. Here is a list to help WWE get started. Please feel free to leave your own suggestions in the comment section below.
10. "Casper" starring Sheamus
9. "Invincible" starring John Cena
8. "American Pie" starring The Miz, John Morrison, Alex Riley, Cody Rhodes, and Dolph Ziggler.
7. "The Benchwarmers" starring Primo Colon, JTG, and Zack Ryder
It’s impossible to go anywhere in America without hearing some sort of “Jersey Shore” reference. Expressions like “GTL” and “grenades” are as widespread as “Austin 3:16” t-shirts were during the height of Stone Cold’s run in the WWF. The biggest star to emerge from the phenomenon is Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi. She may not have “J-Woww’s” sex appeal or Sammi’s complete inability to accept any sort of responsibility for being whiny and annoying, but she just might be the one thing the WWE needs to pull them out of their complacency. Here’s why:
10. WWE hasn’t had a relationship with MTV in ten years. The first three seasons of “Tough Enough” aired on MTV, and that helped to bring the teens and young adults who missed the Hulkamania boat over to the WWE in time to enjoy The Rock and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin... [CONTINUE READING]
J.C.S. presents The Top Ten Things in Pro Wrestling That Sound Dirty But Aren't...
When watching a wrestling show, announcers and wrestlers often say things that are unintentionally funny. We here at PW Potato have compiled a list of terms and phrases that can be heard on any weekly pro wrestling show that kind of sound dirty but aren't. We will plug in wrestlers names just so we don't have to overuse terms such as "he" and "him." We all know how Mr. McMahon who is the master of our wrestling universe feels about those words.
Andrew Soucek presents Vince McMahon's Top Ten Excuses for a Lousy Fourth Quarter 2010...
10. “Communal Merchandise Sharing” - Vince says that due to the economy, WWE fans are forced to buy t-shirts and Cena armbands by pooling their money together and wearing them on alternating days.
9. “Not Enough Michael Cole” – In the next quarter, Michael Cole will host every show by himself, wrestle on every show, be revealed as the General Manager, and have his image superimposed over the WWE logo in the right hand corner of the screen.
8. “The Death of Paul Bearer” – The unexpected and accidental murder of Paul Bearer had ruined nine more months of supernatural storylines, and put Edge and Kane in prison for the next 10 to 15 years... [CONTINUE READING]
Today we flash back 20 years to a Top Ten List published in the PWTorch Newsletter cover-dated February 14, 1991. If you have a top ten list, we invite you to send one in, as this reader did 20 years ago, and we may publish it here at PWPotato. Send to pwpotato@gmail.com.
TOP TEN PICK-UP LINES OF WWF SUPERSTARS
(10) You show me your clavicular protuberance and I'll show you mine!
Less than two weeks ago at the Royal Rumble Kevin Nash returned as a suprise entrant after weeks of speculation that he would be re-signing with TNA to be part of their latest "They" storyline. Fans worldwide were shocked when he returned at the WWE Royal Rumble with jet black hair as Diesel.
We here at PWPotato have conducted several interviews with current and former co-workers of Big Daddy Cool as to why he might choose WWE over TNA. We were given several theories and suggestions, so we compiled the following list as to why he made this decision.
10. At 51 years old, Nash was just another guy in TNA. He can't handle being just another guy.
9. The Kevin Nash Brand is damaged; the Diesel Brand is fresh again.
8. He hopes to score a one-on-one match at WrestleMania with The Great Khali so, for once, he can carry a match... [CONTINUE READING]
Wrestling fans worldwide have been questioning for the last year and a half why Vince McMahon refuses to allow Jim Ross to announce on one of his television shows. We here at pwpotato.com have conducted interviews with several current and former WWE employees on this very subject. We were given several theories and suggestions, so we have compiled the following list which best explains this baffling decision.
10. Mr. McMahon recently decided PPV buy rates depends heavily upon on much gel announcers put in their hair.
9. J.R's announcing is much too realistic for Mr. McMahon's liking. Mr. McMahon never wants his universe to feel like they are watching a sporting event.
8. Like sneezing, Mr. McMahon views Beall's Palsy as a weakness. He doesn't tolerate weaklings in his universe...[CONTINUE READING]
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OUR MISSION STATEMENT
We'll print anything.
BOARD OF INSPIRATION GOVERNORS
Special thanks to Vince Russo, Vince McMahon, The Shockmaster, Dan Quayle, The Hardys, Poopy Jokes, and Big Egos and Blowhards Everywhere.
WANNA BE A POTATO CONTRIBUTOR?
Do your friends say you're funny? Or do you at least think you're funny? Can you write well? Do you know a lot about pro wrestling and follow it closely? You might have what it takes to become a contributor to PWPotato. Email us at pwpotato@gmail.com if interested (and include a writing sample). We welcome Reporters, Columnists, Top Ten List Writers, Cartoonists, and any other satire / parody formats.
DEFINITION: "POTATO"
(verb) In pro wrestling, to "potato" someone is to strike them for real, usually unintentionally, most often done by a green, careless, tired, or chemically impaired wrestler; sometimes done on purpose to settle a score or send a message (or because you're a bully.)
