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MOJO MITCHELL'S WWE RAW 11/10: Stream of Stephanie McMahon Gets Creative And Ends All The Bad Storylines (Okay, One of Them)
Nov 10, 2008 - 11:15:32 PM
My stream of consciousness real-time analysis and observations on Raw...
Batista comes out to get a win, because, as you know, when you win all the time and act like nothing sweats you, one loss and the fans lose complete faith in you.
He's not here to whine and cry (good, he got beat by the rules, fair and square). He's invoking his re-match clause with Chris Jericho right now.
Stephanie reads some lines on the big screen. No rematch, because her brother Shane said the winner of the cage match would defend against John Cena at Survivor Series, effectively alienating Batista from her sibling, the bitch (but which is which?).
Note to aspiring wrestlers: Check with Creative in the afternoon before invoking your re-match clause.
"We need to break away from the past, the bad angles, and the poorly thought-out storylines," Steph says, so Rey Mysterio faces Kane one last time in a No DQ match and Chris Jericho faces Shawn Michaels for the final time in a Last Man Standing match tonight. Hey, wait a minute, wasn't that the good one?
Randy Orton says the words "John Cena" and gets booed.
Randy Orton says he's better than Batista. Batista says he's better than Randy Orton. Batista challenges Orton to a match tonight. Orton accepts (the crowd chants RKO! RKO!), saying when he wins the title soon, he'll hold it a lot longer than eight days. Ouch. Batista lunges for him, but Orton rolls out of the ring.
Santino Morella introduces the Honk-a-Perfect-Mountie-Meter. That IC record is 123 weeks and Santino is up to 13. Everyone in England enjoys Santino, until he says he's from the best country in Europe - Italy - and some of them boo.
William Regal (w/Layla) faces Santino Morella, who is wearing Salvatore Bellomo's old singlet. One knee to the temple from Regal and we have a new Intercontinental Champion. I know some of you were disappointed, but no way was Santino going the whole honkin' way, particularly after the Honky Tonk Man fizzled in the same ring with Santino.
Regal is proud to be champion, proud to be a true subject to her Royal Majesty the Queen, and proud to represent his country.
This just in: William Regal, after a positive on a recent WWE Health and Wellness screening, has been stripped of the Inter-Continental title.
Kane doesn't like to be liked.
D-Lo Brown (he's still there?) faces Mike Knox. Oh, that's why he's still there. Get Knox a two-by-four and a flag to carry and he'd have it.
Big Jay was the first person to get WrestleMania tickets in Houston.
The Glamazon is worried about Santino, who says what happened was a tragedy. He called up Shane McMahon and told him off, so Shane is making the Glamazon defend her title against Mickie James. She's so mad she grabs Santino's phone and smashes it. His shriek of girlish fear and surprise is the best thing on the show so far.
Boy, the promo video this week really, really puts over John Cena returning to his hometown in Boston.
Buzzzkiller Chris Jericho isn't impressed. He wants to tell the Batista story instead (He beat Batista for the World Title last week) or maybe The Shawn Michaels Story (He and his fans are all liars and cheats, he threw Michaels' wife through a TV screen, accidentally punch his wife, and beat Michaels at his own specialty - the ladder match.) The just back from injury John Cena's story is going to end in tragedy at Survivor Series. (Yeah, if Giant Baba was booking, maybe.)
Its such a relief, after TNA's recent Newsletter of the Air, to see a guy do a good promo about beating, and beating up, his hated opponents instead of, like, complaining about them reading comic books.
Kane faces Rey Mysterio in the ten o'clock main event. It'll be interesting to see if Rey can hold the rating. Kane beats up Rey for a while, since he doing the job (I assume, I haven't read the spoilers.) Ugly huracarana from Rey because of the size difference…
Mysterio wins with an awkward looking body press. WWE Creative needs to give Rey a new, more suitable opponent.
Manu and Cody Rhodes are still mad at Randy Orton for what he did to Ted DiBiase even after he bowed them down last week. Orton says DiBiase was the weak link and he just did what they didn't have the guts to do. They're just not in Orton's league. .
Cody Rhodes slaps the piss out of Orton, and Manu goes chest-to-chest with him. That's how you get new guys (more) over.
Batista faces Randy Orton. Wait, Cody Rhodes comes down to tell Orton he can't beat Batista, but he can. No one believes it.
Batista faces Cody Rhodes. The Manchester fans are understandably disappointed about this latest switch and this has no heat. For those of you counting at home, first it looked like Batista wins. That's not how you get new guys (more) over. Oh well, it was a nice three minutes.
Beth Phoenix (w/Santino) defends the Woman's Title against Mickie James, to the disinterest of the English fans. Santino throws James into the post so Phoenix retains.
Here's a good idea: WWE hypes a match for next week: C.M. Punk goes for revenge against Randy Orton for kicking his head in and costing him his WWE Title. (Granted, they killed off the issue on last week's Raw…)
Chris Jericho faces Shawn Michaels in a Last Man Standing Match. This isn't up to their previous matches, even though Jericho puts Michaels in the Walls on top of a cab.
A tired Michaels comes off a ladder onto Jericho on the table. JBL runs down for a two second cameo, missing Michaels and flying over the barrier. Jericho uses the distraction to whack Michaels in the head with his title belt. Michaels beats the ten-count and hits Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere, but JBL recovers and crushes a hands-up Michaels with a chair.
Jericho gets up before the ten count. Michaels doesn't. Jericho wins. The crowd is disappointed.
Score: 7.0
This was pretty solid, newsworthy show, with a minimum of Shane'n'Steph. The Cena promo video was a step up from the already big hype of the previous ones. Chris Jericho beating Shawn Michaels again, this time in a pay-per-view length match, on free TV of course is a plus. Jericho did another very good promo. That said, the match wasn't quite at the level of their other ones. WWE must not have much faith in Santino Morella's ability to have actual matches. I wasn't shocked the Honk-a-Meter was stopped. No way today's Vince McMahon has the patience to see a mid-card angle go an entire year, no matter how it's received. The double bait'n'switch with Batista's opponents (Jericho to Randy Orton to Cody Rhodes) was pretty bad. They did something constructive with Rhodes and Manu, and then reversed it minutes later. Send feedback on this article to pwtorch@gmail.com and we'll regularly publish reader feedback in the "Torch Feedback" category on the Main Listing.
