By Pat McNeill, PWTorch columnist

Wake the pets and call the neighbors. It's time for our DGUSA internet pay-per-view preview column!

DISCLAIMER: Projections are made by myself and for myself with absolutely no assistance from Gabe Sapolsky or Sal "Rhymes With Amway" Hamaoui. Projections are not predictions, because this is the column where everything's made up, and the points don't count. No one knows the contents of these projections, but I, in my divine and mystical way, will ascertain the finishes to these matches despite not being caught up on my Dragon Gate DVD's. Some of our departing contestants will receive a supply of Hillshire Farms smoked sausage. Hillshire Farms sausages, slow cooked with natural spices, available in pork, beef and turkey. Remember, this is only an exhibition. This is not a competition. Please, please, no wagering. This lineup is based on the best available information as of this writing.

Torch editor Wade Keller keeps asking me why I can't post pay-per-view preview columns two or three days in advance. Now you know. How many times am I going to have to rewrite this column? You know what? If DGUSA changes the card after this, they're on their own.

The skinny on this is that DGUSA had its big season finale weekend set to go. Then Chris Hero became available for tomorrow night's show, and Gabe Sapolsky and friends dropped everything and rebooked two days worth of the match to get tomorrow night's Johnny Gargano vs. Chris Hero bout, with the DGUSA Title on the line. There's nothing wrong with that. Unless, of course, you're trying to write a preview of the big Saturday night supercard at the Queensboro Elk's Lodge. I'm not selling tonight's show short because, as you'll see, there is a LOT of talent signed for this evening.

Before we get to our picks, let's do today's Wrestling History Lesson. Once upon a time, there was a major promotion called World Championship Wrestling. Fifteen years ago, WCW presented its WCW Thunder television show from Fort Wayne, Indiana. November 19, 1998. In this match, Alex Wright battled Chavo Guerrero, Jr. Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay & Larry Zbyszko had the call.



As your free gift for viewing this column, let's take you back to July 27, 2013, from the spectacular DGUSA Bushido event. It's the DGUSA Open the Freedom Gate champion, Johnny Gargano, battling his former stablemate, Rich Swann. Lenny Leonard has the call.



And, because Bruce Mitchell reads these, here is the epic Ivan Putski vs. Bugsy McGraw match from January 7, 1976 in the Hamburg Field House. Thanks, WWE!



Enough of that. Now on with the projections!

Caleb Konley & Andrew Everett vs. Steven Walters & Biff Busick: Konley and Everett are two very talented singles wrestlers, so I'm curious to see how they gel here in their first ever Marvel Team-Up. Walters & Busick have also received praise for their work on the indies. Projection? Everett pins Busick with the 450 Press.

Trent Baretta vs. Chuck Taylor: It's the long-awaited Battle of the Guys Who Should've Made It Big, Yet Haven't. Projection? Baretta wins with the Dudebuster DDT.

Jimmy Susumu vs. Anthony Nese (w/ Random Dude) : Now Anthony Nese is a Dragon Gate regular. On one level, that's great. On the other level, DGUSA needs American stars. Projection? Nese Hammer-jammers Jimmy with that neat reverse piledriver move he does, setting up tomorrow's big grudge match.

A.R. Fox vs. Shane Strickland vs. Mr. Touchdown vs. Fire Ant (EVOLVE Title): Is it time to take the Evolve championship off the Whole Fox'n Show? Maybe. Is one of these three challengers going to take it? Maybe Fire Ant would be a good champion, but I don't see it happening tonight. Projection? A.R. hit Strickland with Lo Mein Pain and keeps the championship.

Rich Swann vs. Ricochet: Sorry that Genki Horiguchi missed his flight. And I'm sure that's what happened, and not that someone between here and Tokyo decided to save a buck or two since no one was ordered this show to see H.A.Gee.Mee battle beat boxing Rich Swann in a match where the outcome was a foregone conclusion. No, sir. Where was I? Right. Projection? Ricochet wins the Chocolate Rain. Rumor has it that Mr. Monster Express will be debuting his new submission move, the Cameron Locke, so keep an eye out for that.

Johnny Gargano vs. Masaaki Mochizuki (Non-Title): Our DGUSA Freedom Gate champ against one-third of the Triangle Gate champions. Do you really need me to tell you this will be a good match? Okay, then, it'll be a good match. Projection? Gargano. Hurtz, don't it?

Young Bucks vs. Bravado Brothers (DGUSA Tag Team Titles): This will be a really good match. Since last you saw Matt and Nick, they've become the IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Champions. Ordinarily, this would be a good night to have a title change, but I'm not feeling it. Projection? Matt Jackson beats Harlem Bravado after Harlem kicks out of More Bang for Your Bucks and Matt kicks Harlem in the balls. (They're heels. What do you want for a finish?) The Bucks continue their amazing autumn.

Aftermath: On Sunday night, it will be DGUSA Freedom Fight on iPPV! Assuming no one else changes the lineup, I'm taking Walters, Taylor, Konley & Everett, The Bravados, Baretta, Fox & Mochizkui, Ricochet & Gargano to win their respective matchups in Brooklyn.

***
Pat McNeill of Richmond, Va. has been a Torch columnist since February 2001. He'd take Georgia and the points against Auburn later today. You know, if gambling were legal.

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