By Pat McNeill, PWTorch columnist

We are Live from barside for exclusive PWTorch.com coverage of the 2011 WWE Survivor Series! I'm your cordial host, Pat McNeill.

I am joined by Mrs. McNeill, who will be leaving after dinner to go home and watch TLC or something.

Scott Stanford is interviewing Miz & Truth on the pregame show. At least, I assume that's what he's doing. "The Weight" is playing

...over the speakers, so we can't hear the show yet. How does Mrs. McNeill feel about me doing my report during dinner? Don't know.

She's texting her friends. By the way, we won't be discussing the NFL in this report. Or on the postgame audio. Right, Wade?

You can follow our coverage tonight on our website, our Facebook page, our Twitter, our newsletter, on Blogtalkradio, and on iTunes.

And if you want coverage via carrier pigeon, send Torch editor Wade Keller an e-mail, and we can work something out.

The new song from Florida opens the show. Oops. That's "Flo Rida." I'm in my forties, deal with it. John Laurinaitis is out to bore us.

Now we open things up with the US Title match. Dolph Ziggler faces John Morrison. The New York crowd chants for Zack Ryder.

Tonight's show is apparently brought to you by Twitter. You can follow the action on Twitter by using the hashtag #SellYourWWEStock

Good crowd here tonight at the bar. Mrs. McNeill has breaking news for us. The Duggars are visiting London. #19KidsAndCounting.

Morrison is busting his tail tonight. Vickie saves Dolph by putting his foot on the ropes, and then gets ejected.

Could someone check to see if #ShutTheF**kUpMichaelCole is trending on Twitter yet? Thanks.

Dolph hits the Famouser and J-Mo kicks out. Dolph gets his knees up to block Starship Pain, then wins with the Zig Zag. Vickie's back.

The crowd still wants Ryder. And here he is! Zack hits the Ruff Ryder on Dolph and Dolph & Vickie take a powder. The fans dig it.

The Divas title Lumberjill match is next. Mrs. McNeill starts working on her Thanksgiving shopping list. Booker thinks Eve's a superwoman

By the way, the entrance set is cooler than normal. The service here is decidedly worse than normal. Beth heads to the floor, gets thrown

Beth crotches Eve on the top rope. Glam Slam off the top rope! She's dead, Jim. Beth gets the three count. Champs are 2 for 2 tonight.

..back in. Apparently, Eve's superpower involves shaking her booty. This is actually a decent match. Natalya tries to help Beth.

We get an ad for WWE'12, where the average teenager can put together a better show than Vince McMahon.

David Otunga finds CM Punk backstage and tells Punk that Laurinaitis is upset with Punk. I can't imagine that's news to anyone.

Punk doesn't much care. Then we go to The Rock for his promo. Rock immediately gets muted for saying "WWF." This promo is awesome.

Rock sings Sinatra, and gets the crowd to chant "Ladyparts" at John Cena. Yeah, I don't think Rock cares much what other WWE guys think.

Time for Team Orton vs. Team Barrett. Can we get some less generic music for Wade Barrett, please? And for Hunico, while we're at it.

Ten minutes of entrances later, the match is underway.

Orton hits Ziggler with the RKO and no one makes the save. Thanks for stopping by, Dolph. It's five on four.

Sin Cara misses a dive onto Hunico, injures his ankle, and gets counted out. The trainers are out to check on Sin Cara.

The crowd is so concerned that they start chanting for Zack Ryder. Mason Ryan, who looks like a BALCO ad, tags in.

After some sloppy offense from Ryan, Cody Rhodes hits him with the Cross Rhodes and pins him. The crowd starts chanting for Cody.

Team Barrett has the four on three advantage. Wait! We interrupt this match to tell you that Sin Cara is trending on Twitter!

Barrett killifies Kingston and hits the Wasteland for the pin. It's four on two. Mrs. McNeill is done with dinner and has abandoned ship.

In comes Sheamus, the Grand Wizard, I mean, The Great White. Jack Swagger is not long for this match. Sheamus won't break on the 5 count.

The ref disqualifies Sheamus! Sheamus is pissed, and hits Swagger with the Brogue Kick. Orton pins Jack. It's three on one.

But Barrett is the legal man. Wasteland on Orton, and Barrett gets the win.

Hunico tries a springboard clothesline, but eats an RKO instead. Orton pins Hunico and it's two on one. Orton goes after Cody.

Cole tells us that Rhodes and Barrett are the sole survivors at the 25th anniversary of Survivor Series. There are 2 things wrong with

...that statement. Backstage, Alberto Del Rio is chatting up the Bella Twins, when he encounters Laurinaitis Interruptus.

The Executive VP In Charge Of Mismanaging Talent tells El Patron he's taking his match too lightly. Del Rio disagrees.

The Miz, the main event heel on tonight's show, wants you kids not to be bullies. Really? REALLY?

We watch as the ring is specially reinforced for Mark Henry vs. Big Show. I'm Pat McNeill, and I approve this message.

Henry vs. Show is underway, and the match is trending on Twitter, thanks to 35 dedicated employees in Stamford retweeting each other.

The crowd chants for Daniel Bryan, who is not trending on Twitter. One fan wants Repo Man in the WWE Hall of Fame.

Even though the fans are chanting it, #Boring is not trending on Twitter either. Big Show kicks out of three power moves.

So Henry runs Show through the barricade. The crowd approves. Unfortunately, Show beats the ten count. The match continues.

Show hits a superkick and goes to the top rope. Eventually. Macho Man elbow off the top, but Henry kicks out. What's next?

Mark Henry has a chair. He goes to Pillmanize Show's ankle, but Big Show moves. Knockout punch from Show to Henry.

Now the crowd REALLY wants Daniel Bryan to show up. Big Show does the full Pillman on Mark Henry's ankle. Here comes the stretcher.

Matt Striker interviews Wade Barrett. They are interrupted by The Miz and R-Truth. They get no respect. No respect, I tell you.

Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler show us that WWE fans are using Twitter (just like everyone else on the freaking planet.) Punk-Del Rio next!

You know, I think we had a bigger bar turnout for "Money In The Bank" then we have tonight. Tonight, Del Rio is driving a 1984 Fiero.

CM Punk has his own personal ring announcer for tonight, Howard Finkel! The crowd chants for Howard, so Cole tells us how fat The Fink is.

The MSG crowd loves them some C.M. Punk. Scott Armstrong is your referee. It's clobbering time.

Punk has the crowd chanting for Colt Cabana. I kid you not. We're off to a slow start. Then again, it's a Del Rio match.

Punk hits a Ricky Steamboat crossbody off the top rope and follows it up with...a Randy Orton chinlock. Just kidding. It wasn't that bad.

Del Rio goes on offense, and the crowd is dead. Punk rallies with every bit of 1970's offense he can come up with.

Del Rio busts out the backstabber and the Punk running lnee in the corner, but Punk survives.

Punk sets up for the Macho elbow, but Del Rio crotches him. Del Rio misses a shoulderblock in the corner. Punk hits the elbow this time.

They're trading moves. Alberto hits the flying armbar. Punk makes it to the ropes. Punk gives Roberto the big boot.

Punk locks in the Anaconda Vise. Del Rio fights it. Del Rio rakes the eyes, but Punk will not let go. Del Rio taps. We have a new champ

Punk celebrates in the crowd. Based on the ovation here, I know who takes over as top babyface when Cena turns heel.

We get an ad for the upcoming four disc Steve Austin DVD set, which looks like the best Christmas present ever. Main event is up next.

Wait a minute. 1996 Rocky was saying there were 23,000 fans at the Garden. So why are there less than 17,000 there tonight?

If that video package was supposed to make me root for The Miz and R-Truth, it worked.

It's worth noting that we now have several more people in the Blast Area, with the main event starting up.

Over the past seven days, we've found an issue that New York fans and Boston fans can finally agree on. They ALL hate John Cena.

It was neat to see the two guys from the pool room wander in, both in slack-jawed amazement that The Rock is actually wrestling again.

Cena leaves the ring to kiss his mother at ringside, because the fans weren't booing him enough or something. The Rock starts the match.

The Rock looks great. The New York crowd chants "You still have it" at The Rock. They have better grammar than the Impact Zone fans.

Rock has Truth pinned with the Perfect Plex, but the ref is trying to get Cena out of the ring and misses it. Foreshadowing?

...disproves the whole conspiracy theory. The dueling chants are back, and the Cena fans are losing the duel.

Cena gets some offense in, then taunts Rock. That was dumb. Cole wisely points out that Miz & Truth are in the main event, which...

The grownups aren't rooting for Miz & Truth. They just want Cena to tag Rocky in. Near fall by Truth. Rock does not make the save.

Speaking of foreshadowing, Booker starts telling the audience what a selfish guy Rock is. Cole chalks it up to jealousy by Booker.

Nope. Cena makes his own comeback and puts the STF on Miz. Truth makes the save. Truth and Miz then work over Rock on the outside.

Booker follows up by telling us that if Miz & Truth work over Cena for another "5-10 minutes," it will all be over. I hope so.

Truth misses the Super Deluxe Loop De Loop legdrop and Cena makes the hot tag to Rock, who mows through the heels and locks the scorpion...

...on Miz. Truth makes the save. Rock with a comeback. People's Elbow on Miz and Rocky gets the pin. Cena applauds...from the aisle.

Cena declines to celebrate with The Rock. But Rock insists. Cena enters the ring. The crowd does not approve. Cheers for Rock.

Boos for Cena. Staredown. Cena starts to leave. Rock Bottom on Cena. Cena sells it like it actually hurts. And that's how we leave it.

Thanks for joining us. Stay tuned for James and Greg with the post-show Livecast on BlogTalkRadio, and the VIP roundtable.

We suggest these recent related articles...

McNEILL's Late Night Deadblog - WWE Night of Champions: Bucklebombs, Light-up Jackets, Poachers, IcoPro, Eddie, more!

Night of Gold: McNEILL Previews Night Of Champions 2015 (w/Wrestling History Lesson)

Double Duty: McNEILL previews ROH's All-Star Extravaganza VII pay-per-view!