TAKE PWTORCH
WITH YOU! Get our iPhone App (FREE!): Click Here Or enter "PWTorch.com" on your Blackberry or other Smart Phone browser for mobile-version of PWTorch.
Torch Feedback
TORCH READERS WRITE BACK: Why was Kozlov smiling on the ECW TV broadcast? Jun 12, 2009 - 1:15:06 PM
During Tuesday night's ECW TV broadcast, notorious Russian heel Kozlov came to the ring randomly smiling. There was no explanation. There was no possible reason. So, Torch readers, if you saw the WWE broadcast, why was Kozlov smiling?
Send your best serious, inane, not-serious, or ludicrous answers to the question, "Why was Kozlov smiling?" to pwtorch@gmail.com.
Torch Reader Responses
-- Blair Farthing says: "He just saved a ton of money on his car insurance. Geico!"
-- Ed. B says: "He accidentally entered the Hart Dynasty room when Natalya was changing. His trunks then became an 'Iron Curtain.'"
-- Brett W. says: "Why was Kozlov so happy? His evil spot-botch twin Batista is injured, and he will no longer have to compete with anyone for the award of most botches."
-- Torch specialist Shane McKinley says: "He's been destroying people for about three months now and we barely pay attention. Can't remember the last Kozlov squash I actually watched in its entirety. But the night he smiles is the night we started to pay him attention. My advice for Kozlov is to show up next week with a new look on his face: quizzical, perturbed, insane, dopey..."
-- Benjamin Tucker says: "He's happy that more people want to watch his matches than watch another Cena-Show match."
-- Mike Cole says: "Come on, he's obviously smiling because Slayer's new album is about to come out. Russians love Slayer."
-- Craig Bursch says: "He just finished watching a tape delay of Raw and figured out how lucky he was to be on ECW."
-- Gerardo Rodriguez says: "He is happy Edge and Vickie are getting a divorce; he loves sloppy seconds."
-- Stu Parker says: "Because he realizes he's stuck on a 'B' show never to be heard from again!"
-- Jason Pointer says: "I think that they realize they'll get more out of him being a face (if that's possible considering he can't speak) than as a heel e.g. The Great Khali."
-- Shawn Decker says: "Just before exiting the curtain, a small boy backstage saw him frowning and asked, 'What's wrong Sam Eagle?' Kozlov, a closet Muppets fan, looked into the mirror and couldn't help but see the uncanny resemblance."
-- Ken Sabala says: "Kozlov's smiling because he had a long awaited bowel movement before the match. It seems he's been holding it back since he got in the WWE. Pee you."
Send feedback on this article to pwtorch@gmail.com and we'll regularly publish reader feedback in the "Torch Feedback" category on the Main Listing.
INCREDIBLE BENEFITS! Over 50 full-length audio updates per month (iPod compatible)... New weekly award-winning Pro Wrestling Torch Newsletter (text and printable pdf versions) with latest exclusive insider news, new Torch Talks, great columns, Keller's cover story, much more... Hundreds of full-length back issues of PWTorch Newsletter from late-'80s to today... Ad-free access to PWTorch.com's Main Listing... VIP Forum with interaction with other subscribers and Torch staff... Torch Talk Library with text and audio of hundreds of interview installments from last 20 years... Great layout... Deepest archives on pro wrestling history anywhere... Keller's PWTorch Today PDF Bulletins with email alerts... VIP Email reports on major PPVs and TV shows... Staff Roundtable Reviews (text and audio) followiing major events... The best staff of writers and world class reporting since 1987... We'd love for you to join us and experience the most entertaining, authoritative, experienced staff of professional reporters and commentators in the business...
Compare the value of four or five months of PWTorch VIP content to the price of just one PPV. Can you cut 25 cents a day from your budget to make room for PWTorch VIP?
AND NEW FOR 2009! Monthly "Vintage Audio Torch Talks." We are releasing for the first time ever audio versions of our text Torch Talk updates, the historical first series of insider interviews ever. Wade Keller's newsmaking in-depth interviews with wrestling's biggest names are now being made available exclusively to VIP members. But you must be a member each month, as these are not archived, so they are replaced with a new one each month! This debuted in January 2009 with a 68 minute interview with the late "British Bulldog" Davey Boy Smith. Who's next? Hulk Hogan? Eric Bischoff? The Rock? Goldberg? Jeff Hardy?
