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6/27 WWE Great American Bash PPV review: Sower's "alt. perspective" report on event

Jun 28, 2004 - 1:04:00 AM
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By Kevin Sowers, Torch Team Contributor

WWE Great American Bash"Alt Perspective" Review
June 27, 2004
Norfolk, Va. at The Scope Center

What could have been, and what should have been all got together tonight, and gave us The Great American Bash. Have I lost you? Okay, it goes like this. A few things that could have happened, didn't. A few things that should have happened, did. Are you with me, now? Or, are you as lost as Bobby and Cindy Brady at the Grand Canyon? Follow me, I'll show you the way out.

Torrie Wilson said hello inside the ring. Hi, Torrie!

John Cena came out and gave us an R-rated promo, complete with over the top sexual references, taking shots not only at the other three participants, but at General Manager Kurt Angle as well.

(1) John Cena defeated Booker T, Rob Van Dam, and Rene Dupree at 15:52 to retain the U.S. Title All four men started it off by brawling and John Cena paired it off with Rene Dupree as Rob Van Dam and Booker T went at it on the other side of the ring.

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John Cena (artist Joseph Borzotta, PWTorch)

Booker T went to toss RVD over the top rope but RVD turned the tables on Booker Tand dumped him out of the ring and then slammed his head into the security wall.RVD then knocked Dupree down to the mat with a spinning heel kick and hit him with the rolling thunder andcovered him for a two count. Dupree did the French Tickler and then ran off the ropes as Booker T caught him in a spinebuster to take him down to the mat. RVD then went to the top rope andcame off with the frog splash onDupree. Cena went to the top rope and RVD knocked him down with a spinning heel kick. RVD then went to the top rope and hit the frog splash on Booker T. RVD then got ready to cover Booker butCena quickly got in the ring and rolled RVD up to pin him for the three count.RVD was eliminated.

Cena then rolled Dupree into the ring and Booker T gaveCena a cheap shot from behind to knock him down to the mat. Booker T and Dupree then double teamed Cena in the ring. Booker T nailed Cena with a kick to knock him down to the mat and then Dupree covered Cena but only got a two count as Booker Tbroke it up. Booker T and Dupree then argued and got into a shoving contest until John Cena plowed through both of them with a hard double clothesline. Cenathen grabbedDupree and gave him the FU. Booker T thenkicked Cena in the mid section and hit him with a scissors kick. Booker T then covered Dupree for the three count to eliminate him from the match.

Booker Tthen covered Cena but only got a two count. Booker T pinned him again for another two count and then again but was unable to get the three count. Booker Tthen mountedCena and nailed him with a number of hard right hands. Booker T kickedCena in the gut and went for the scissors kick, butCena stepped out of the way and then planted Booker T with the FU and then the pin for the three count.

John Cena is looking exhausted as he saunters past Miss Jackie and Charlie Haas backstage. Cena flirts with Miss Jackie, and walks off. Kurt Angle is then seen, and tells Charlie how much Charlie has fallen. Angle then says he has a new protege, in the name of Luther Reigns. Angle says he promised Luther a match tonight, and felt Charlie was the most worthy opponent. Their match was next.

Sable interviews herself in a hot tub backstage, hyping her match against Torrie Wilson.

(2) Luther Reigns defeated Charlie Haas at 7:11 Charliewent behind Luther and put him in a waist lock and then shoved him into the ropes. Luther backed Charlie off of him and Charlie grabbed Luther once again and backed him into the ropes, but Luther grabbed the ropes, forcing the referee to break the two up. Lutherwhipped Charlieinto the corner and as Charlie came out of the corner, Luther pressed him over his head and slammed him down to the mat and then pinned him for a two count. Luther used the "Roll of the Dice" on Charlie and then pinned him forthe win.

John Bradshaw Layfield cuts a promo backstage, saying he will keep his promise and walk out of Norfolk the new WWE Champion.

(3) Rey Mysterio defeated Chavo Guerrero, Jr. at 19:40 to retain the Cruiserweight Title No, that isn't a typo. A Cruiserweight match allowed almost twenty minutes! THAT is the kind of stuff that WWE needs. They keep going in that direction, the sky is the limit. This was a classic match, that went above and beyond the call of duty.

Rey Mysterio and Chavo Guerrero stood face to face in the ring as Chavo talked some trash and then he stepped back and the two locked it up in the center of the ring. Chavo put Rey in a waist lock and thentook him down to the mat.Rey got out of it and grabbed Chavo by the arm and rolled him up to get a two count. Chavo worked over the left knee of Reyand put Rey in a half crab. Rey used his right leg to kick Chavo in the face to break it up. Chavo then went for a back drop of sorts, but Rey countered it into a bulldog to pull Chavo down to the mat but Rey looked to have landed on his left knee on the way down.

Chavo lifted Rey onto his back and Rey spun around into a huracanrana to pull him down to the mat. Chavo then whipped Rey into the corner and Rey hopped over Chavo and landed on his knee, giving Chavo the opportunity to capitalize by grabbing Rey. Chavo grabbedRey and gave him a suplex onto the turnbuckles, leaving him stuck in the tree of woe position. Chavo charged at Rey, but Rey pulled himself up and Chavo went sailing into the ring post and then to the arena floor. Rey then went to the top rope and came off with a senton on Chavo to take him down to the outside of the ring. Chavo and Rey battled on the very top rope and then both men tossed each other down to the center of the ring. Referee Charles Robinson started the count on both Mysterio and Guerrero as they were down and out. Chavo got up and pinned Rey for a two count, but Rey countered it into a quick cradle for a two count.

Chavo went back to the knee and he gave Rey a slingshot. Rey landed on the second rope and came back with a drop kick to send Chavo down to the mat. Rey then ran off the ropes and hit Chavo with a springboard cross body and thengave Chavo a side Russian leg sweep and a pin for a two count. Rey jumped on Chavo, but Chavo caught him and countered it into the Gory Bomb and then coveredRey, but only got a two count. Reyhit Chavo with an Enzuigiri to knock him into the middle rope andgave him the 619 and went for the West Coast Pop, but Chavo caught him in a single leg crab in an attempt to get Rey to tap out, but Rey crawled to get to the bottom ropeas Chavo pulled him back to the center of the ring. Reyfinally crawled to the ropes to break up the hold to stay in the match. Chavo put Rey in a power bomb position andwent for the Gory Bomb, but Reycountered it into a sunset flip power bomb into a pin forthe three count.

An outstanding match, that I will bring up again at the end of my report.

Torrie Wilson is now in the hot tub, with Spike Dudley, Nunzio, and Funaki. The three men then argued over whowould have won the Cruiserweight Title match had one of them been in it. Torrie got out of the tub, and said she'll let them continue their discussion, so she can get ready for her match. As she is shoving her rump in the air, all three men stop talking, and stare. As Torrie struts off, Funaki says in perfect, slow broken English, "God Bless America."

(4) Kenzo Suzuki defeated Billy Gunn at 8:05 I really thought this Suzuki character had some potential, but I guess I was wrong. A very ho hum match, that was five minutes too long.

Billyand Kenzo tied it up in the center of the ring, and thenKenzo powered Billy into the corner. The referee started the countas Kenzo went for a chop in the corner, but Billy ducked out of the wayas Kenzo hit the ropes. Billythen mocked Kenzo Suzuki andhe did a crotch chop.Later in the match, Billywhipped Kenzo into the corner and gave him the stinger splash, and thenwent for the fame-asser. Kenzo avoided it and kicked Gunn in the gut. Kenzo then ran at Billy and gave him a knee to the face and then pinned him for a two count. Kenzo gave Billy a modified back breaker in a headlock position and then covered him for the three count to get the win. There were more missed spotsthan recent memory recalls, as this one could have been called a "Slopperknocker". Sorry, J.R.

PaulHeyman was seen backstage taunting Paul Bearer, who was tied to a chair and had black tape covering his mouth.

(5) Sable defeated Torrie Wilson at 6:04 I have nothing nice to say about this match, so for those who want to know what happened, I will oblige. Torrie took Sable down to the mat and mounted her and gave her a number of right hands until Sable shoved her off. Sable put Torrie in a reverse choke, applying the knee to the back. Sable and Torrie knocked heads, and Sable looked to be out of it. Torrie wanted to go for the win, but the referee did not allow her. As Torrie showed concern, Sable rolled Torrie up, hooking the trunks to get the win. Torrie's shoulders weren't even on the mat. C'est la vie.

Undertaker was seen by himself, in the dark, backstage, with his game face on.

Dawn Marie was shown standing by with Rene Dupree and Dawn said that he must be upset about the fatal four way tonight. Rene said that he got cheated and the United States Title should be his. He's not going to be upset because French people do not get upset, they get even and he is going to protest to get a rematch for the title. As for tonight, he must say Dawn is looking ravishing. Rene claims The French are far better lovers than fighters, and would she like to see his French tickler? Rene then did the dance and the FBI showed up and Nunzio told Dawn that if she wants to be impressed, why not take a look at his 15 inches? Nunzio then showed Dawn his boot and he said you know what they say about guys with big feet. Dawn went with Nunzio. Johnny Stamboli approached Rene, asking him what size he is? A size six? Stamboli then went on his way as Rene Dupree did not look too happy.

(6) Mordecai defeated Hardcore Holly at 6:30 What should have happened, did, when Mordecai pinned Holly. What could have happened, is throwing this match on Velocity where it belonged. If they're trying to push Mordecai, they'll need someone other than Holly to do it.

Holly got in the ring and stood face to face with Mordecai, then Mordecai shoved him back and Holly laid into Mordecai with a number of right hands into the corner and then chops against the corner. Holly tied Mordecai up in the ropes and then gave him a number of hard right hands and then a boot to the side of the head. On the outside of the ring, Holly walked into Mordecai's staff which distracted him, and gave Mordecai the chance to beat on Holly on the arena floor. Holly gave Mordecai a reverse DDT andpinned him but only got a two count. Holly then grabbed Mordecai, but Mordecai reversed it into a sit out spinebuster and a pin for a two count. Holly went for the Alabama Slam, but Mordecai countered it and gave Holly the Crucifix Bomb to get the win.

(7) John Bradshaw Layfield defeated Eddie Guerrero at 21:06 in a Texas Bullrope Match to win the WWE Title A great match, that had a logical ending. I miss gimmick matches like this, as itbrings an old school feel to the match, and a Texas Bullrope Match definitely smells like old school NWA, and the storied Great American Bash matches of the 1980s.

At the sound of the bell, JBL and Eddie felt each other out with the bull rope, and then JBL went for a clothesline. Eddie ducked it and gave JBL a drop kick to the knee to send him down to the mat. JBL hit Eddieand touched one of the corners, and then Eddie nailed JBL with a drop kick to send him into the turnbuckle. JBL put Eddiein the tree of woe position and thengot out of the ring and wrapped the rope around Eddie's neck to choke him out. JBL then took the cover off the Spanish announce table and thenpulled Eddie off the ropes and pulled him out of the ring and slammed him into the Spanish announce table. JBL pulled the top off theSmackdown announce table as well and then smiled. JBL got up on the table and set Eddie up in a power bomb position, but Eddie ducked down and wrapped the rope around the leg to trip JBL.

Eddiepicked up a steel chair and nailed JBL with it to bust him wide open. Eddie then brought the steel chair into the ring, and Eddie nailed him once again with the steel chair and JBL was covered in blood. Eddie then went to the corners and hit three of them andwent for the fourth, but JBL went to the ropes to hold Eddie back. Eddie then gave JBL a drop kick to the head and then a leg drop. Eddie choked JBL with the rope and blood poured down the face of JBL. Eddie gave JBL three vertical suplexes andwent to the top rope and came off with the frog splash. He thenwent to the turnbuckles and touched the turnbuckles and went for the fourth corner, but JBL rolled out of the ring to stop Eddie from reaching the fourth corner.

JBL wrapped the rope around Eddie's neckand pulled him from the top rope to launch him onto the Spanish announcers' table. The table did not break and Eddie bounced right off of it and went crashing down to the arena floor. JBL then lifted Eddieup and gave him a power bomb right through the table to send the table crumbling down to the floor. JBL then brought Eddieinto the ring and touched three corners andwent for the fourth, but Eddie ducked down and held onto the ropes to stop JBL from getting to the corner. Eddie clenched onto the bottom rope to stop JBL from reaching the corner andJBL went back to work on Eddie.

JBL knocked Eddie down andwent to the corners and hit three of them, but Eddie stopped JBL from hitting the fourth corner. Eddie then gave JBL a low blow with the cow bell and then nailed JBL in the back with the rope a several times. Eddie went around the ring and touched some turnbuckles as JBL touched them as well. JBL and Eddie both hit three and JBL went for the fourth one, but Eddiepulled him back to stop him from hitting the fourth one. Eddie nailed JBL in the back with the cow bell and then jumped on JBL and touched the turnbuckle. JBL also touched it with his back but Eddie's music hit was announced the winner and still WWE Champion. After the match, Kurt Angle was wheeled out on his wheelchair by Luther and Kurt said he isn't out here because of any personal vendetta, he's out there because as the General Manager, he needs to do the right thing and he needs to make sure that the right decision was made. Kurt said we all need to see is the footage of the end of that match. They showed the footage of Eddieand JBL both hitting the turnbuckle,but JBL hit the turnbuckle first with his shoulder. The rules state that it doesn't matter which part of your body touches, all that matters is who touches first. Kurt apologizes but has to announce that the winner of this match is the new WWE Champion, John Bradshaw Layfield.

A great match, and another classic. After the announcement was made, Eddie stayed behind in the ring, and seemed genuinely distraught, but the crowd cheered him on, anyway. Here's hoping a third match between JBL and Eddie takes place at SummerSlam.

Undertaker defeated the Dudleys at 14:42 Paul Bearer was shown sitting in the crypt and if the Undertaker does not do the right thing in his match against the Dudley Boys, the crypt will be filled with cement at the hands of Paul Heyman.Heyman accompanied Bubba and D-Von out to the arena and remained at the staging area as the Dudleys headed to the ring.Heyman took the mic andsaid that before this match begins, he just wants to make sure that tonight, Undertaker has decided to do the right thing and just in case it crosses his mind not to do the right thing, this is just a mere demonstration of what will happen to Paul Bearer. Heyman pulled the lever and cement poured right into the cryptas the Undertaker just looked at him. Bubbasaid to prove to the world that he is with them. Bubba told Undertaker to do the right thing and lay down.

Undertaker got ready to fight Bubba, but Bubba told him not to even think about it. Undertaker laid down on the mat, and D-Von signaled for a three count. Bubba sent D-Von out of the ring and Bubba got on top of Taker and said that he has been waiting for this moment his whole life. Undertaker grabbed Bubba by the throat and D-Von got in the ring and grabbed him by the throat as well and Heyman said that is not what he calls doing the right thing. The Dudleys then laid into Undertaker with a number of right hands to send Undertaker staggering around the ring.

On the outside of the ring, the Undertaker slammed Bubba's head into the announcers' table several times and then whipped D-Von into the ring post, shoulder first. Undertaker then nailed Bubba and thengrabbed D-Von and brought him back into the ring. Undertaker grabbed D-Von by the arm and walked the top rope andHeyman said, "Bad dog, bad dog!"

Undertaker hopped down from the rope and Heyman pulled the lever and filled the crypt with cement half way as Paul Bearer cried, saying Undertaker will save him. Heyman told Undertaker not to test him again, and D-Von charged at Undertaker. Undertaker knocked him down with a big boot. Bubba then grabbed Undertaker by the legs and pulled him into the ring post, groin first.

Undertaker got both Dudleys down on the mat and then bailed out of the ringas Heyman threatened Taker, saying one more move and he pulls the lever, and it will be the end of the Great American Bash and the end of Paul Bearer. Bubba and D-Von attackedUndertaker from behind andHeyman said that was the wrong move, so he pulled the lever again to fill it up to Paul Bearer's chest. Bubba went over to Heyman and argued with him and he turned the lever off. Bubba said that they started this, and they can finish it. Once they finish with Undertaker, then he can have Paul Bearer.

The Dudleys gave Undertaker a double team suplex and then Bubba went off the ropes and nailedUndertaker with an elbow drop. Bubba gave Undertaker a couple more elbow drops and then pinned Taker but only got a two count. Undertaker grabbed Bubba by the arm and walked the top rope for the old school, and came off with it to send Bubba down to the mat. Undertaker then grabbed D-Von and went for a tombstone, but D-Von got out of it. Bubba and D-Von gave Undertaker a double team neck breaker and Heyman walked towards the ring with the urn in his hand. Undertaker sat up and looked into the eyes ofHeyman Then, Heyman held up the urn as Bubba nailed Undertaker from behind. Undertaker planted Bubba with a choke slam and thengave D-Von the tombstone and pinned him for the three count to get the win.

Heyman said he thought they had an arrangement. He thought they agreed that he would do the right thing, and it's obvious that he cares about Paul Bearer, so since Undertaker will not do the right thing, he guesses Paul Heyman will have to do the right thing. Heyman went towards the cement truck and a lightning bolt came down and hit the truck to send Heyman down to the ground. Undertaker then got out of the ring and walked towards Heyman as Heyman screamed in fear.

Undertaker went over towards the truck, and looked at Paul Bearer and then knelt down in front of him on one knee. Undertaker stood up and took a look at the lever and walked towards it, and took the mic and said: "Paul, I have no other choice. Rest in Peace." The Undertaker then pulled the lever to fill the crypt and destroy Paul Bearer in the process.

Not a bad match, not a great match. However, it will hopefully end the character of Paul Bearer, and give Undertaker the edge he needs. Paul Heyman seems to be thebetter match for him.

Match of the Night This goes to Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero, Jr. This match had it all, high spots, wear downs, and told a great story. I can only hope we get fed the same diet of this caliber of a Cruiserweight match. All I can say to Vince is, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"

MVP We'll give this one to Eddie Guerrero. He was robbed, well kinda. Anyway, his emotions throughout the match and after seemed genuine. Once again he puts on a solid match, and gets my vote for the Great American Bash MVP.

Before I go, I wanted to let you know that the Lounge Conversation Championship is vacant, as three of us, Mallory Mahling, Paul Solinger, and I correctly guessed three out of the five matches that were announced. So, call it a triple count out.

I'll see you here next month, for Raw's Vengeance. Take care.

Kevin also coordinates the Lounge Conversation, the Power Rankings, and also writes"Jobber Jabber." He can be emailed at XanderWB@aol.com.


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