WWE Smackdown Report PARKS'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 8/9: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of Friday show, including Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam and an appearance by Brock Lesnar
Aug 9, 2013 - 9:00:26 PM
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WWE Smackdown review
August 9, 2013
Taped 8/6/13 in Rockford, Ill.
Aired on SyFy
By Greg Parks, PWTorch Columnist (Twitter: @gregmparks)
- WWE Open.
- Smackdown Open.
1 – RANDY ORTON vs. ROB VAN DAM
During Orton’s entrance, they showed clips of Orton and RVD form last week’s Triple Threat match, also featuring Christian. Also, JBL and Michael Cole were shown at ringside. The match began with reversals and counters until RVD hit a jumping back kick. There was a fan in the front row with a whistle, a la Bill Alfonso, who used it to get the crowd to chant “Rob Van Dam.” After Orton took Van Dam down, the guy then got a “Rob Van Dam” chant started (or tried to) without the whistle. Orton duck a Van Dam attack, leading to both men falling out of the ring. The wrestlers went right in front of the RVD Superfan (who also had a Rob Van Dam sign), and RVD set up Orton right next to the guy and connected on his legdrop off the apron onto Orton, who was draped over the barricade. They went to break at 3:05 of the match.
Back at about 6:15 of the match. Neither man could gain control until Orton shoved Van Dam off the top rope and to ringside, with Van Dam banging into the barricade. Orton then dropped Van Dam spine-first into the barricade. Orton settled into a chin-lock at the eight-minute mark. RVD made a comeback, which included a superkick right in the chin. Split-legged moonsault for two at 8:58. Van Dam again went to the top and somersaulted onto Orton, grazing him on the way down. If you’re not going to catch the guy to sell it, I’m not sure that move is worth doing because there’s no other “good” way to take it. Orton surprised Van Dam with a unique back-breaker, pulling Van Dam off the second rope to do it, for a near-fall. “Look at Orton just taking his time,” Cole remarked, to which JBL replied, “No wasted motion.” Do these guys even pay attention to what the other says? Powerslam by Orton for two. Suplex and a bridge by RVD. Only a two-count. RKO was countered with a kick and a body-scissors pinning combination got two. Rolling Thunder in which Van Dam landed on his head on Orton’s mid-section. RVD missed the frog splash and Orton RKO’d him for the win.
WINNER: Orton, at 13:09. Tremendous match, with a really fun final few minutes. Van Dam’s high-powered offense is just so unique, it helps set him apart from the rest of the roster.
A few moves during the match were replayed, including the missed frog-splash and the RKO.
- Tonight, Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio. Uh…what?
- Also, Miz TV with A.J. Lee and Big E. Langston. Can the awesomeness of A.J. (and to a lesser extent, Langston) counteract the generally terrible TV these segments make? We’ll find out next!
- Miz was in the ring for Miz TV. Miz said A.J. has as many talents as she does mood swings. He introduced her and Big E. Langston. The two made their way to the ring. As they did so, the finish of Langston vs. Dolph Ziggler (with both Lee and Kaitlyn getting involved) was shown. Miz asked what the relationship was between A.J. and Langston. A.J. damned Langston to the friend zone. She even said he was her best friend. Miz gave a thumbs-up to Langston and said “cool.” Miz said A.J. has had many friends in WWE, all of whom she tried to ruin. Miz ran through them all and A.J. made a snide comment for each of them (for Kane: “He wore a mask during everything”). Miz suggested A.J. was the problem, but A.J. insisted her heart has been broken many times. She said Kaitlyn even dumped her as best friend. She said the Divas title is the one thing that will never leave her. She said it will be with her forever. She had some choice words for Ziggler, who then came out to his theme.
Ziggler said it’s been the story of his life: Women just can’t get over him. “Ziggler” chant from the crowd. A.J. said Ziggler is out there because he’s not over her. She had a clear tone of desperation in her voice. She said Ziggler is upset that he’ll never be able to touch her again. Cue Kaitlyn’s music. She walked out onto the stage and had a mic. Kaitlyn said Ziggler can’t touch her, but she can. Kaitlyn walked to the ring, saying A.J. cost her and Ziggler their titles. She asked why A.J. is so obsessed with them. An argument ensued until Miz interrupted. Miz said since he’s the host of Summerslam, he feels like he can do anything, so he’s going to create a match: A.J. Lee and Big E. Langston vs. Kaitlyn and Dolph Ziggler. Kaitlyn said she couldn’t wait to slap the crazy off A.J.’s face. A.J. jumped her and Langston pulled her off. Ziggler came from behind and gave Langston the Zig Zag. Kaitlyn followed that up by spearing A.J. The physical portion of the segment was replayed.
- Daniel Bryan was shown shaving Wade Barrett from Raw. Tonight, Bryan vs. Barrett.
- Up next, we’ll relive the “blind rage” exhibited by Brock Lesnar on Raw.
- The Raw Rebound aired.
- A graphic aired advertising an exclusive interview with Brock Lesnar tonight.
- Alberto Del Rio was already backstage with Vickie Guerrero (I bet he walked in and interrupted her on the phone), complaining about having to face Christian tonight. Vickie said what he did to Ricardo Rodriguez on Raw was despicable, which is why she made the match for tonight. ADR said if he gets hurt tonight, he might not be able to compete at Summerslam. She said it’s a risk she’s willing to take.
- Summer Rae and Fandango danced their way out from backstage. They headed to the ring as Fandango faces Kofi Kingston next.
2 – FANDANGO vs. KOFI KINGSTON
After Kofi came to the ring, they showed clips of his return against Fandango on Raw. Cole even reminded viewers what led to Kingston being on the shelf. A couple leap-frogs and a back elbow by Kingston. He tried Trouble in Paradise early, and was back-dropped to ringside for his troubles. Snap suplex by Fandango on the outside. RVD fan tried to get a “USA” chant going for some reason. Kofi countered a suplex into a pin for two. Fandango charged the corner and went shoulder-first into the ring post. Fandango took a breather after Kingston started his comeback. Kofi went to the top, but Summer Rae protected her man. She argued with Kofi, so he jumped over her and onto Fandango. She sold an ankle injury outside the ring. Kofi showed remorse, which led to Fandango sending Kofi skull-first into the ring-post. Cole wisely reminisced about Summer Rae faking an injury before, in the angle with Chris Jericho. Back in the ring, Fandango came off the top with a leg-drop for the victory.
WINNER: Fandango, at 4:44. Not as good as their Raw match, but serviceable enough.
A replay of the key moments of the match aired.
- Daniel Bryan was walking backstage. Renee Young approached him and asked him what he thought about the makeover he was forced into. Bryan said he likes his beard and telling him to get a makeover was his breaking point. He said unlike John Cena, he never had to change himself to get to WWE. He vowed to beat Cena for the WWE Title at Summerslam.
- Cole thanked Clinton Sparks, featuring 2 Chainz, Macklemore and D.A. for “Gold Rush,” the official Summerslam theme.
- A replay of the finish of the six-man tag main event from Raw was shown. They also showed the post-match happenings.
3 – DANIEL BRYAN vs. WADE BARRETT
Barrett was completely beard-less. JBL asked if it was Wade Barrett’s son. He brought the clippers to the ring and as he did, they showed Vince McMahon telling Bryan he needed to shave the beard, and what went down with Barrett and Bryan. Apparently, Barrett’s grandfather was a barber. Now that’s what I call character development. Once the match began, the two brawled in the middle of the ring. Barrett, as one would expect, got the better of the exchange. Barrett did his top rope flip and running clothesline within the first 30 seconds. Bryan hit the ropes, but Barrett followed and clotheslined him over the top rope. Barrett whipped Bryan into the ringside stairs. Barrett continued to work over Bryan inside the ring. Bryan charged at Barrett, but was on the receiving end of the Winds of Change for two. Barrett retrieved the clippers, but Bryan fought them off. Bryan connected on a jumping knee to the face outside the ring. Top rope headbutt found the mark. Yes Lock followed, as did a tap-out.
WINNER: Bryan, via submission, at 4:08. Just a match to continue establishing Bryan as a worthy PPV title contender.
The fight over the clippers, and the finish of the match were replayed.
- JBL and Cole talked about Bryan’s hot streak. They threw it backstage to Renee Young.
- Young was standing by with Damien Sandow. They (and we) watched Cody Rhodes throw Sandow’s MITB briefcase into the Gulf of Mexico. Sandow called Rhodes a thief and said they’d settle their differences at Summerslam. He offered up a Sandow-ized briefcase that appeared to be made of leather. Apparently, a new contract is inside. Sandow promised to become World Champion of the Unwashed Masses.
- Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio is still to come tonight.
- Kane was walking backstage. He’s in action next.
- A Wyatt Family video package aired.
4 – KANE vs. 3MB – 3-ON-1 HANDICAP MATCH
Cole informed fans of the Ring of Fire match, the type of match Kane challenged Bray Wyatt to at Summerslam. Quick fury by Kane was stomped out by 3MB. Kane booted Heath Slater down, then sent McIntyre and Mahal out of the ring. Slater was next. Mahal was sent face-first into the announce table. Kane was able to fight off the entire group outside the ring. Slater was sent over the announce table and into the barricade. Awesome sell-job by Slater there. Mahal was in the ring and he was chokeslammed and pinned by Kane.
WINNER: Kane, at 1:35. Kane showed good fire in that one. Sorry, I just had to do that.
After the match, Bray Wyatt cut a promo on the TitanTron, from his rocking chair. Wyatt said a Ring of Fire match seems to cater to someone who calls himself the Devil’s Favorite Demon. Wyatt said fire won’t control the souls of his brothers. He said soon, the fire will rise up around Kane and the tables will be turned. He said the fire is afraid of him. Wyatt said he’s already dead. The other two Wyatt Family members stood behind him during the promo. Back in the arena, Kane cued the fire from the ring posts.
- Cole and JBL talked about Total Divas on E! and the JBL and Cole Show on WWE’s YouTube Channel. Cole sent it to the interview with Brock Lesnar.
- Lesnar was shown more cutting a promo than being interviewed. It was highly stylized with video clips thrown in. He said it’s personal between him and C.M. Punk. Lesnar said people are calling this match the Best vs. the Beast. Lesnar said Punk thinks he’s a tough guy because he takes beginner MMA classes at his local gym. Great line. Lesnar said he’s not jealous of Punk. Lesnar said he was champion in WWE when Punk was wrestling in front of 100 people in high school gyms. He said Punk has never faced anyone like him before, because there is no one like him. “Size does matter,” he said. He then said Punk will learn what it means to truly be victimized by Brock Lesnar.
- This coming week on Raw, it’s C.M. Punk vs. Paul Heyman.
- Christian came to the ring for his match with Alberto Del Rio.
5 – CHRISTIAN vs. ALBERTO DEL RIO
As Del Rio came to the ring, they showed RVD beating him on Raw and then ADR beating on Ricardo Rodriguez after the match. Cole said there’s no word when or if Rodriguez will return from the injuries he suffered at the hands of Del Rio on Monday night. Del Rio held a long side headlock to start. Christian took Del Rio down with a headlock take-over. RVD fan was doing the Berzerker “Huss” at his ringside seat. Fans then began a “JBL” chant. Christian tossed Del Rio over the top rope in front of the announcers. Dropkick through the ropes by Christian. Del Rio ended up on the announce table as they cut to break at 2:54 of the match.
Back with Del Rio firmly in control. He stomped on the back of Christian for a two-count at 6:46. Christian took over and came off the top with Del Rio outside the ring, but Del Rio stepped aside and Christian dove into the barricade. Back in the ring, Christian and Del Rio exchanged hard kicks. “USA” chant now with Del Rio working over Christian. Del Rio and Christian, battling on the top rope, both ended up falling out of the ring as they went to break at 10:49.
Back at 14:16. Del Rio landed a middle-rope dropkick. Pin got a two-count. Del Rio as sitting on the top rope, and Christian nailed him with a hurricanrana for two. Del Rio ran into a corner boot and Christian dropkicked Del Rio from the middle rope. He then went to the top and hit a cross-body for two at 16:33. Second-rope elbow to the jaw. Tilt-a-whirl back-breaker by Del Rio for two. Killswitch countered into a back-stabber for a near-fall. Spear out of nowhere by Christian for two at 18:44. Del Rio suckered Christian in with a headbutt to the gut, then sent him shoulder-first into the ring-post. Cross arm-breaker countered into a roll-up for two. Del Rio kicked Christian in the face. Both men were down at the 20-minute mark. Another surprise roll-up by Christian, and he was able to pin Del Rio.
WINNER: Christian, at 20:21.
Del Rio displayed some anger after the match. He re-entered the ring and trash talked Christian, who then gave Del Rio the Killswitch. Once Christian got backstage, Damien Sandow ran out with his briefcase and a referee. Sandow wanted to cash it in, at least, until Cody Rhodes jumped him and attacked him. Cross Rhodes to Sandow. The announcers clarified that the bell never rang, so the cash-in was never official. The show closed with Rhodes staring at Sandow from the ramp.
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Greg Parks has been covering WWE Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. Follow him on Twitter @gregmparks for live Tweeting during Raw, Impact, and PPVs, as well as other bits of wisdom. Comments, questions and feedback are welcome, and can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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