WWE Smackdown Report PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 3/15: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of the Friday night show, including Henry vs. Ryback
Mar 15, 2013 - 9:00:55 PM
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WWE Smackdown review
March 15, 2013
Taped 3/12/13 in Ft. Wayne, Ind.
Aired on SyFy
By Greg Parks, PWTorch Columnist (Twitter: @gregmparks)
- WWE Open.
- Sheamus came out to the live crowd. It’s a match to start off the show.
1 – SHEAMUS & RANDY ORTON vs. TEAM RHODES SCHOLARS
During Orton’s entrance, they showed Michael Cole, Josh Mathews and Brad Maddox at the commentary table. As Sheamus came out, they showed The Shield’s attack on Orton and Sheamus from Raw. On his way to the ring, Damien Sandow did some mic work and mentioned how their post-show date with the Bellas had to be postponed on Raw thanks to Sheamus and Orton. Sandow was about to tell a story, but Cody Rhodes interrupted him and said we didn’t deserve to hear the story.
Rhodes seemed to be in trouble early on, but he snuck out of a potential powerslam and tagged in Sandow. Sandow battled out of White Noise, but fell victim to the repeated forearms to the chest. Rhodes was knocked off the apron for good measure as well. That allowed Sandow to bring Sheamus throat-first across the top rope. Outside the ring, Rhodes nailed Sheamus with the Disaster Kick (using the announce table as his jumping-off point). They cut to break at 2:18 of the match.
They returned at 5:05 of the match. The Rhodes Scholars were in control of Sheamus. Frequent tags by the heels kept Sheamus from tagging in the fresh man. Sheamus was able to even things up at 7:40. Both he and Sandow crawled to make tags. Sandow tagged out first, but Sheamus managed to do so as well. Orton came in and cleaned house on Rhodes. Overhead T-bone suplex by Orton. Rope-assisted DDT by Orton. Sandow attacked from behind, then was Brogue Kicked for his troubles. RKO on Rhodes for the pin.
WINNERS: Orton and Sheamus, at 8:46. Chances are, Sheamus and Orton will be higher on the card at Wrestlemania than Rhodes Scholars (presuming Orton and Sheamus face The Shield in some combination), so I understand them going over here. It’s all about building for Mania.
Before Orton and Sheamus could celebrate too much, The Shield’s music played. Instead of coming through the crowd, they appeared on the Titan Tron via shaky cam. It seems weird that they’re still saying their names in the middle of their promo. Dean Ambrose talked about those who they have run through in their short time in WWE. Seth Rollins talked about how The Rock and John Cena are “criminals” because they’ve taken once again from them, that being the main event of Wrestlemania. He said the greatest injustice is that they don’t have a match at Mania. Ambrose told Sheamus and Orton to find a partner to face them at Wrestlemania. Orton agreed first, and Sheamus did as well. They said at Wrestlemania, Orton and Sheamus will believe in The Shield.
- Still to come, Chris Jericho vs. Jack Swagger.
- Also, Ryback vs. Mark Henry.
- WWE Films’ The Call was plugged with that Halle Berry-David Otunga-Kane skit from Raw.
- A Fandango vignette aired. He premieres….tonight. Maybe.
- The announcers were shown on-camera and they voiced over Brock Lesnar’s attack on the New Age Outlaws from Raw. Paul Heyman’s promo was shown as well. The announcers speculated about what stipulations Heyman would put in the contract for Lesnar vs. Triple H. Triple H responds to Lesnar’s challenge on Raw Monday night.
- Sheamus and Orton were having a pow-wow backstage when Big Show walked up. He said Sheamus and Orton need a partner for their match at Wrestlemania, then suggested that while he doesn’t trust either man, he should be that partner. Orton agreed. So did Sheamus. Which is why they picked….him. Sheamus pointed to Ryback, who was standing just off-camera. Hmmm.
- Henry vs. Ryback is still to come.
2 – TAMINA SNUKA & AKSANA vs. KAITLYN & LAYLA
No entrances for anyone, but the babyfaces were at least finishing theirs in the ring. Mathews acknowledged a tinge of jealousy Layla has appeared to have when it comes to Kaitlyn. Layla used her boots to knock Tamina off-balance, but Tamina caught a kick and put Layla down. Aksana tagged in, put the boots to Layla, then tagged out. Naomi and Cameron were shown watching the match backstage. Aksana grabbed an arm and leg of Layla and put a foot into Layla’s back on the mat to stretch her out. Suplex by Tamina for a two-count. Kaitlyn made the tag at 2:49 and took the fight to Aksana. They were both wearing a lot of black. Inverted DDT by Kaitlyn for a two-count. Tamina helped turn the tide, but Kaitlyn shoved Aksana into Tamina. Spear by Kaitlyn, but Layla tagged herself in and hit a springboard cross-body for the win.
WINNERS: Kaitlyn and Layla, at 3:48. I’m liking the slow burn between Layla and Kaitlyn. The match won’t be any good, but they’re pretty good at playing their characters.
Naomi and Cameron cheered over the victory backstage with their pom-poms. The Bellas walked up and the Funkadactyls were complimentary. Cameron said she grew up watching the Bellas. The Bellas insulted the Funkadactyls, then offered a handshake to introduce themselves. Instead, they went on the attack and beat up the cheerleaders in the backstage area. Referees and agents (Mike Rotundo, Jamie Noble) broke up the fight.
- The Raw Rebound aired, focusing on Undertaker and C.M. Punk.
- Team Hell No came to the ring. Kane faces Dolph Ziggler, next.
3 – KANE vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER
Ziggler and his entourage were in the ring, and they showed Big E. Langston man-handling Daniel Bryan on Raw. Kane, still angry from the goings-on from Raw, was aggressive to start. Kane uppercut Ziggler, who fled the ring. Ziggler was caught in a choke, but Ziggler fought back. He ran into a big boot. Ziggler was back-dropped to the apron. He went to the top and dropkicked Kane for a two-count at 3:01. Kane went head first into the middle turnbuckle via drop toe-hold. DDT on Kane for two. Kane caught Ziggler in a vertical suplex, which he held for a few seconds. Basement dropkick for two at 5:05. Side slam turned into a sleeper by Ziggler. Kane headed to the top rope after breaking free, and clotheslined Ziggler. A.J. got on the apron to plead with Kane. Elsewhere outside the ring, Daniel Bryan and Big E. Langston went at it. Langston threw Bryan into the timekeeper’s area. Kane went outside and gave Langston a big boot. Ziggler hit a fameasser on Kane as he re-entered the ring. Zig Zag by Ziggler for the pinfall.
WINNER: Ziggler, at 7:15. Two wins in a row! The match itself wasn’t great, despite Ziggler’s best efforts.
After the match, Ziggler continued taunting Kane. Kane reached up and grabbed Ziggler in a choke-hold. Langston ran in and ran over Kane. He then gave the Big Red Monster his finisher. They replayed the post-match attack.
- Back to the announcers, who sent it to the spoof video Ricardo Rodriguez and Alberto Del Rio did of Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter. This wasn’t good enough to show the first time, and this is the third time we’ve seen it.
- Backstage, Jericho and R-Truth were yukking it up over the video. “Wigs are always funny,” said Jericho. Swagger and Zeb walked in and asked if they thought that was funny. Truth walked away, leaving Swagger and Jericho. Swagger said he’s fighting for the soul of the country, and Jericho is joking about it. He said Jericho is no different than Del Rio. He said Jericho is trying to take what belongs to real Americans. Jericho said Zeb is like a cross between Rush Limbaugh and Yosemite Sam. He said Swagger needs to focus less on politics and more on his matches, with Del Rio at Wrestlemania and with him tonight. Jericho told Swagger to “shut the hell up” to end the segment.
- Another Fandango vignette. He’s out next.
- They showed a JBL Tout during his latest mountain climb. He’ll be back next week.
- The Great Khali and Natalya were dancing in the ring. Fandango and his dancer came out. Fandango got the mic before Lilian could say his name. He called out Khali and Natalya for their in-ring dancing, saying it was “unacceptable.” He called Khali “stretch,” which was hilarious for some reason. He wanted to see if Khali could pronounce his name correctly. Khali sounded like he said, “bandango.” Fandango told him to shut his mouth and to follow his lead. Fandango pronounced his name and Khali followed with each syllable. Khali put it all together but didn’t come close. Fandango said that was horrible and said Khali will have to reimburse all the people in the arena who will be missing out on his debut. I’m not embarrassed to say I did get a cheap laugh out of that segment.
- Next, a Wrestlemania main event preview.
- A video package on John Cena vs. The Rock aired.
- Matt Striker was backstage. He said the six-man tag match involving The Shield for Wrestlemania was just made official by Booker T. Orton and Sheamus were there to be interviewed and Sheamus said he felt they had the advantage. Before they could say much more, The Shield attacked. Sheamus was put through a catering table. Referees finally showed up on the scene after The Shield had done their damage. Mike Chioda called for someone to get Booker T.
- Booker T., Teddy Long, referees and medics were helping the fallen faces. Ryback came on the scene and asked what happened. Booker told him that it was The Shield, but to not lose his cool and just focus on Mark Henry.
4 – MARK HENRY vs. RYBACK
Lock-up in the center of the ring started the match. “Feed me more” chant right out of the gate. After they broke the tie-up, The Shield’s music played. They came down from the crowd. Henry and Ryback stood their ground. Henry left the ring. The Shield jumped Ryback.
WINNER: Ryback, via disqualification (no bell), around 1:33. I was hoping Henry vs. Ryback would be a Wrestlemania match. There’s still a possibility Big Show takes Ryback’s spot in the six-man, but with this attack, Ryback will no doubt want revenge on The Shield.
Ryback was able to fight off the first wave, and Henry looked to re-enter the ring. Ryback turned his focus to Henry, allowing The Shield to attack Ryback from behind. Triple powerbomb on Ryback. They stood tall over the fallen strong-man. They left the ring and Henry, still at ringside, entered. He gave Ryback the World’s Strongest Slam. He followed it with one more. Cole called Henry’s actions “disgusting.” Henry gave Ryback a third Strongest Slam. Maybe Ryback’s anger toward Henry will supersede his anger toward The Shield. Henry said he’s not one of the punks Ryback is used to running through and that Ryback won’t run through him. Crowd chanted “feed me more,” which would be an apt chant for Henry at that point.
- They showed The Shield’s attack from before the break, as well as Henry picking up the scraps.
5 – JACK SWAGGER vs. CHRIS JERICHO
During Jericho’s entrance, they showed the WWE Rewind, which was Swagger beating Sin Cara on Raw and Alberto Del Rio making the save. Jericho wrestled Swagger to the mat, then back to their feet. Mathews noted that nearly three years to the day, Swagger cashed in his MITB briefcase to win the World Title…against Chris Jericho. Jericho clotheslined Swagger down, though Swagger didn’t sell it well. Springboard dropkick by Jericho sent Swagger from the apron to the arena floor. They cut to break at 2:09 of the match.
The show returned at the six-minute mark of the match. Swagger got Jericho in a rest-hold and shouted “we the people!” over and over again. Swagger hit Jericho with a hard clothesline and registered a two-count at 7:33. Colter was busy riling up the crowd at ringside. Jericho went to the top and hit Swagger with an axe-handle. Face-buster but Jericho couldn’t hook on the Walls. Enziguiri took Swagger down. Swagger took out Jericho’s knee and applied the Patriot Lock. But Jericho reversed out of it and got a small package for two at 10:41. They cut to break at 11:01.
They returned at 14:13 of the match, at 9:55 EST. DDT by Jericho for two. Jericho countered a gutwrench powerbomb and tried to apply the Walls. Jericho countered that and put him in the Patriot Lock. Jericho again reversed and this time sat down in the Walls. Colter got on the apron, and the distraction allowed Swagger to reach the ropes. He slid out of the ring while Jericho argued with Zeb. Baseball slide by Jericho onto Swagger. Swagger was then thrown shoulder-first into the ring steps. Jericho went to the top rope once again and hit a cross-body for two at 16:54. Knees to the face by Jericho, but Jericho was rammed into the turnbuckle. Swagger missed a charge, but Swagger caught Jericho on a Codebreaker attempt and threw him into the corner. Jericho took a hard head-first bounce off the turnbuckle. Gutwrench powerbomb by Swagger to end it.
WINNER: Swagger, at 18:00.
The finish of the match was replayed. Colter and Swagger stared at the Wrestlemania sign as Swagger celebrated his win.
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Greg Parks has been covering WWE Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. Follow him on Twitter @gregmparks for live Tweeting during Raw, Impact, and PPVs, as well as other bits of wisdom. Comments, questions and feedback are welcome, and can be sent to email@example.com.
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