WWE Smackdown Report PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 6/1: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of the show, including C.M. Punk vs. Kane for the WWE Title
Jun 1, 2012 - 9:00:11 PM
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WWE Smackdown review
June 1, 2012
Taped 5/29/12 in Baton Rouge, La.
Aired on SYFY
By Greg Parks, PWTorch Columnist (Twitter: @gregmparks)
- WWE Open.
- Voice-over man narrated a video package chronicling Kane’s involvement in the Daniel Bryan vs. C.M. Punk storyline, and set the table for tonight’s WWE Title match.
- Smackdown Open.
- Fireworks began the in-arena portion of Smackdown, as Josh Mathews introduced the show.
- In the ring, Lilian Garcia introduced the World Champion, Sheamus. The announcers talked about Sheamus facing Alberto Del Rio at No Way Out. No announcement of that being a Cage Match…yet. Sheamus talked about congratulating Del Rio for being #1 contender the best way he knows how. A video aired of Del Rio scoring the pin last week on Kane to become the challenger to the World Title, and the attack by Sheamus that ensued. Sheamus said he wanted to set the tone for the World Title match at No Way Out. He then talked of Del Rio’s riches and how because of that, he thinks he’s better than everyone in the locker room and in the crowd. But money can’t buy the World Title. David Otunga’s theme interrupted and he walked out. Is it just me, or is that coffee mug growing in size by the week?
Sheamus asked Otunga how his head was after he kicked it off last week. Otunga, in the ring, said he was there on behalf of John Laurinaitis. He instructed the production people roll the tape from Raw two weeks ago, where Sheamus bowled over Laurinaitis on the stage when running to the ring. Otunga reminded Sheamus that Eve tried to get an apology from him last week, but he declined. So this week, Otunga ordered Sheamus to apologize. Sheamus said this isn’t Starbucks, where you can just walk up and order whatever you want. He threatened to stick Otunga’s coffee mug where the sun doesn’t shine. Otunga said Sheamus might be the whitest bulb, but he’s not the brightest. He was about to ask Sheamus to reconsider his course of action, but Del Rio’s music interrupted, and he rode into the arena in style.
Del Rio had a microphone with him and cut a promo in the aisle on his way to the ring. Del Rio said Otunga was wasting his breath, that the “peasant” Sheamus would not apologize. He called the champion a “street hooligan.” He told Otunga that people like Sheamus end up working for people like them. He said that after No Way Out, he’ll be the World Champion. Otunga said he has no doubt that’ll happen, but Sheamus needs a more immediate form of consequence. He said Laurinaitis has allowed him to decree that the opponent of Sheamus will be chosen by Alberto Del Rio. Sheamus stepped back, appearing to set up for a Brogue Kick. Sheamus said he’s not sorry for what he did to John Laurinaitis, then he Brogue Kicked Otunga. Del Rio scampered out of the ring to avoid punishment. Sheamus told Del Rio to never trust a hooligan. The Brogue Kick was replayed. Basic opening segment that worked for me to further the Sheamus vs. Del Rio issue.
- Tonight, we’ll see Big Show’s dominating performance on Raw.
- After a seven-month hiatus, Sin Cara returns to Smackdown next.
1 – SIN CARA vs. HEATH SLATER
Cara was announced as an “international sensation” by Garcia. No trampoline entrance, but the blue lighting for the match was in full effect. Heath Slater was his opponent. Slater went on offense immediately. Twenty seconds in, Michael Cole claimed Cara looked “better than ever” after getting in one kick. Low expectations, I guess. Cara got the advantage on the outside of the ring, but Slater kicked Cara once they were back in. Cara broke out of a rest-hold and connected on kicks. Springboard back elbow by Cara. Springboard cross-body, but no cover. Headscisssors into a single-arm take-down for the win by Cara.
WINNER: Cara, at 2:24. The return of Cara raises the amount of athleticism on the show and, depending how he’s pushed, could help make up for the loss of Randy Orton on the face side.
- A video was shown of Daniel Bryan attacking Kane with a chair from two weeks ago, setting it up to make it look like C.M. Punk had hit Kane. Kane took his rage out on Punk.
- The WWE Championship is on the line for the first time in nearly four years when Kane challenges Punk.
2 – EZEKIEL JACKSON vs. DAMIEN SANDOW
Jackson was already in the ring. No mic work from Sandow on his way to the ring, but he did have a look of disgust on his face once the bell rang. He asked for a mic and claimed to once again be standing in front of an ignoramus, so he refused to participate in the charade. He got as far as the apron before Jackson pulled him back in. Jackson leveled a corner attack on Sandow, but Sandow avoided the Torture Rack. Knees to the face, then a side Russian leg sweep from Sandow. Elbowdrop got two. Jackson fired back with good-looking forearms to the face. However, Sandow hit his neck-breaker soon after for the victory.
WINNER: Sandow, at 1:37. A win allowing Sandow to continue to climb the ranks, and it can’t speak well for Jackson to lose so quickly.
- Ricardo Rodriguez was ranting in Spanish to Alberto Del Rio backstage. Del Rio told Rodriguez to let him think. Dolph Ziggler walked up to him and asked to be put in the match against Sheamus. Del Rio said he likes Ziggler’s passion and then chose him to face Sheamus.
- Ryback is in action next.
- Mathews thanked Charm City Devils for “Unstoppable,” the official theme of No Way Out.
3 – RYAN SHELTON & CHRIS LYONS vs. RYBACK – HANDICAP MATCH
The duo were billed from Tuscaloosa, Alabama. They did some sub-par mic work which allowed the announcers to laugh at them. They chanted “Roll Tide Roll” to get under the skin of the fans in Louisiana. Ryback picked one up in a bodyslam and kicked the other. Powerslam, then a powerbomb. He picked Shelton up for a powerbomb again, but first, ran him into Lyons. Clothesline took Lyons out of his boots, then a uranage to Shelton. He put both men up for his finisher and connected.
WINNER: Ryback, at 2:00. The jobbers certainly aren’t impressive, but they help make Ryback look good, and that’s what matters at this point.
Many of the high-impact moves of the match were replayed.
- The Raw Rebound aired, involving Big Show’s attack on Brodus Clay, Kofi Kingston, and R-Truth.
- At No Way Out, John Cena takes on Big Show in a Steel Cage Match. The announcers were shown on-camera discussing the feud. Mathews passed on WWE.com’s injury report on Brodus Clay, and told fans to go to WWE.com for updates on Kingston and Truth’s health.
- The reason Mathews couldn’t explain those injuries is because Vickie Guerrero interrupted. A very serious Dolph Ziggler claimed he’d beat the World Champion tonight. Ziggler and Guerrero didn’t seem to be on the same page. The match is next.
- Mathews plugged Dolph Ziggler’s Facebook page – did you know he has 80,000 likes? Do you care? No?
4 – DOLPH ZIGGLER vs. SHEAMUS
Headlock take-over by Sheamus as Cole explained what happened with Ziggler and Jack Swagger on Raw this past week. The announcers noted a more serious side of Ziggler tonight with little show-boating. Since that’s the only personality trait WWE has focused on, they need to give Ziggler something else to make his character more three-dimensional if they want to give him a run as a serious heel. Ziggler kicked Sheamus in the head, but Sheamus grabbed him by the hair and tossed him out of the ring. They went to break 2:39 into the match.
Back at about 5:45 of the match. Sheamus with a hard knee-lift to Ziggler in the corner. Ziggler struggled to get free from Sheamus, holding the apron skirt and finally pulled himself out of the ring. Ziggler took over when Sheamus tried to go out after him. He dropkicked Sheamus off the apron and Sheamus bumped into the announce table on his way down. He got back into the ring at a count of seven. Ziggler worked a rear chinlock and did a little showing off by doing a headstand with Sheamus in the hold. Sheamus picked Ziggler up, putting him on his shoulders, but Ziggler got off and gave Sheamus an awkward DDT. High elbowdrop, but only a one-count at 9:29. More mat-work from Ziggler as Vickie screamed “finish him!” from ringside. The sleeper was avoided and Sheamus managed to catch Ziggler on the apron and pummel him with forearms to the chest. Suplex back in for two at 10:32. Back-breaker from Sheamus for another two-count. Sheamus went to the top rope, but Ziggler threw himself into the ropes to crotch Sheamus. Ziggler climbed up and gave Sheamus an X-Factor off the top. Impressive. Ziggler was shrugged off on a Zig Zag attempt and Sheamus hit his White Noise finish. But he wasn’t done, as he beat his chest in the corner, chanting “Brogue” and waiting for Ziggler to get on his feet. Out of nowhere, Swagger climbed up onto the apron. Sheamus knocked him off, then when Swagger got back on, Ziggler was shoved into him. He then walked into a Brogue Kick for the Sheamus win.
WINNER: Sheamus, at 13:08. Not always smooth, but still a good match.
- The WWE Title is on the line later tonight, but we’ll hear from C.M. Punk next.
- C.M. Punk was backstage with Matt Striker. Punk said Laurinaitis can order him around all he wants – he loves the competition. He said Laurinaitis will do whatever it takes to get the belt off him. He said he’s everything Laurinaitis doesn’t like, but Laurinaitis is everything he can’t stand in this world. Punk talked about all of Kane’s nicknames, but said he has one too: Best in the World. He said he’d make Kane Go To Sleep tonight.
- The WWE Smack of the Night aired, on Titus O’Neil and Darren Young vs. the Usos from last week. No follow-up with Vickie, Swagger, and Ziggler in any kind of backstage segment?
5 – TITUS O’NEIL & DARREN YOUNG vs. SANTINO MARELLA & ZACK RYDER
O’Neil and Young were already in the ring, but they did an inset interview where they stumbled upon the tag-team name of Prime Time Players. Young took Marella down with a back elbow, then an elbowdrop. Tag to O’Neil, who front suplexed Young onto Marella. European uppercut by O’Neil. Santino got a surprise roll-up out of the corner for the three-count.
WINNERS: Marella and Ryder, at 1:17. I believe the roll-up was about the only bit of offense the faces got. This evens the match-up, as O’Neil and Young had beaten Marella and Ryder previously.
As the faces celebrated on the ramp, Big Show came out from behind. He grabbed both by the neck and sent Santino into the WWE logo atop the stage. The punishment was far worse for Ryder, who was thrown into the ringside barrier. Ryder was then sent into the steel steps. Show rearranged the steps, putting them on the ramp. He bodyslammed Ryder onto them. Santino was on top of the stage, trying to crawl to the curtain, but Show stopped him for more punishment. Show crunched Santino’s head with his bare hand, then applied his camel clutch move on Santino, sitting on Santino’s back on the steps. A knockout punch ended the slaughter. You could see Santino bracing for it. Show did some trash talking with the fans, then walked to the back as the camera caught the carnage he left behind.
- They showed what happened moments ago, from the faces winning to getting destroyed by Big Show.
- Close-up on a C.M. Punk wrist-band. The camera panned back to show A.J. She was dressed in full Punk regalia when she walked toward Daniel Bryan. Bryan asked what she was doing, saying Punk thinks she’s a nut-job like everyone else. A.J. asked why Bryan eve cares. He said he did care once, which is more than Punk has. Bryan walked away, leaving A.J. alone.
- Christian joined the announcers at ringside. The WWE Rewind was Christian’s return at Over the Limit, winning the Intercontinental Championship from Cody Rhodes.
6 – CODY RHODES vs. TYSON KIDD
Kidd was already in the ring. Rhodes side-stepped a kick and hurled Kidd chest-first into the corner. Front-first suplex by Rhodes for a one-count. Kidd used the ring ropes to take Rhodes down with a wrist-lock. He couldn’t hook in the Sharpshooter and Rhodes hit the Cross Rhodes for the three-count.
WINNER: Rhodes, at 1:19. A win to build Rhodes back up, presumably for a shot at Christian’s IC Title.
- Kane was walking backstage. He’s facing C.M. Punk for the WWE Title, next.
- C.M. Punk, then Kane, made their entrances. Garcia did formal ring introductions for this one. As referee John Cone held up the championship, they again went to break.
- A hype video aired on Antonio Cesaro, plugging him for an appearance next week. It focused on his in-ring work and him making out with Aksana.
7 – C.M. PUNK vs. KANE – WWE CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Kane rag-dolled Punk into the corner and hammered away with right hands. Kane was low-bridged by Punk, who then dropkicked Kane through the ropes. He came off the top with a double axe-handle to the skull. Back in the ring, an uppercut by Kane put Punk on his back. Punk got Kane down and kicked at him to make sure he stayed down. Punk wrapped Kane’s arm around the ring-post in an effort to neutralize Kane’s finisher. Elbow strikes followed that. Punk had to back out of the corner or risk a disqualification as the referee reached the count of four, and Kane took advantage. Punk ended up getting dumped over the top, which surprised him. They took a break 4:39 into the match.
Back at the 8:53 mark of the match. Punk had Kane on his knees, trying to turn him over, unsuccessfully, only to decide more forearms to the back would have to suffice. Punk was knocked off the ropes by Kane and sent to ringside. A.J. came to the ring, concerned about Punk. Kane took the punishment to Punk outside the ring, then back in the ring, barely got a two-count. Punk walked into a choke at 11:36. Instead of finding himself on the receiving end of a chokeslam, he DDT’d Kane out of mid-air. Running knee to the face by Punk, then another one. Bulldog blocked and Punk missed a kick. Reverse DDT for two. Punk dove into Kane’s arms, but snuck out the back and felled Kane with a kick to the head. Cover for two at 12:49. Big boot by Kane for two. Irish whip then a clothesline in the corner by Kane. Punk gota boot up on a charge and bulldogged Kane. Punk lifted Kane for the GTS, but collapsed under the weight of the challenger. Low dropkick by Kane for a near-fall. Kane went to the top, but Punk kicked him on Kane’s way down. Punk went to the top and A.J. got on the apron. She was pointing frantically as Daniel Bryan ran to the ring. Cross-body off the top onto Bryan. He took Kane down again and hit the elbowdrop off the top for a near-fall. Springboard by Punk, right into an uppercut from Kane. Chokeslam attempt, but Bryan came off the top with a dropkick, catching each man with a foot.
WINNER: Double disqualification, at 16:08.
Bryan attacked Punk with kicks, but Punk exploded out of a corner with a clothesline. Bryan went up into the GTS, but Kane grabbed both men by the throat and hit a double chokeslam. As Kane’s music played, the theme of John Laurinaitis interrupted. He drove himself out on his scooter and declared a Triple Threat match for No Way Out. Why can’t his Raw appearances be that quick and to the point? A.J. knelt in the ring as Bryan and Punk both recovered from the attack. The show ended there.
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Greg Parks has been covering WWE Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. Follow him on Twitter @gregmparks for live Tweeting during Raw, Impact, and PPVs, as well as other bits of wisdom. Comments, questions and feedback are welcome, and can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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