WWE Smackdown Report PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 7/1: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of the show, including Randy Orton vs. Mark Henry
Jul 1, 2011 - 9:00:14 PM
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WWE Smackdown review
July 1, 2011
Taped 6/28/11 in Phoenix, Ariz.
Aired on SYFY
By Greg Parks, PWTorch Columnist
- WWE Open.
- A video packaged aired on Mark Henry and his new-ish attitude of destruction. The voice-over man plugged Henry vs. Randy Orton for tonight. Then they went right into Josh Mathews talking about the match, with the image on the screen.
- Backstage, Teddy Long was playing with his phone (perhaps making more bets on horses) when Christian walked in. He had a contract for MITB against Orton and wanted to sign it tonight. Long said Christian doesn’t have the shot, because it was Mark Henry who won the match for his team last week, not Christian, so their deal is void (perhaps a video at the beginning as a refresher would’ve worked to remind fans what they were talking about). Long said if Henry can beat Randy Orton again, it may be a Triple-Threat match at the PPV. Or, just one-on-one Henry vs. Orton. Christian got in Long’s face and Long replied by saying Christian was banned from ringside for the big match tonight.
1 – RANDY ORTON vs. MARK HENRY
The announcers were shown at ringside during Orton’s entrance, with Cole ranting against Long as usual. As the bell sounded, Henry picked Orton up and took him to the corner. Orton escaped at pounded on Henry with rights. Back to Henry, who Irish whipped Orton to opposite turnbuckles, then landed a belly-to-belly slam for a two-count. Henry put Orton on his shoulder, but Orton got out and ran right into a big boot from the Texan. Henry stepped on Orton’s chest and Booker T. proclaimed that a Henry win should make him #1 Contender for the World Title. Cole said he broke into WWE the same year Henry did, but I feel like Henry was there a year or two earlier. Orton turned the tide and went for a pin, but Henry went to the outside. Henry slammed Orton back-first into the edge of the apron. At 3:46 of the match, Big Show’s music played. Henry shook his head yes and was ready for the show-down. Glad he didn’t back down like so many do. Anyway, Show never came out, and Henry turned around into an RKO from Orton. Orton slid into the ring at nine and won by count-out.
WINNER: Orton, via count-out, at 4:22. I think it says something that they didn’t put Orton over Henry cleanly. Not much of a match.
Henry walked to the back mockingly saying “ha ha” for the joke that was pulled on him. Henry didn’t go backstage, he went down the side of the ramp and into the tech area. He tossed aside a storage locker and found the guy who plays the music. Henry threatened the guy, then knocked some of the equipment off the table. Henry asked the guy what one electrical box did, then threw it on the ground. “Now it don’t do nothin’!” Henry said. I love it! The guy continued to sit in his comfy chair as Henry destroyed stuff, finishing with overturning a table. Henry allowed the guy to leave, then grabbed him by the back of the shirt. Henry lifted him up by the throat, then tossed him over a bunch of boxes into the abyss (they didn’t’ show the guy landing). Then his chair was tossed aside too. I love this, but to add more realism, they should’ve had refs and agents out there trying to reason with Henry so he didn’t destroy (presumably) thousands of dollars of equipment or an untrained technician.
- They replayed the finish of the previous match, as well as Henry’s attack on a poor WWE employee.
2 – DANIEL BRYAN vs. TED DIBIASE
No music for Bryan or DiBiase as Mathews said the audio technician is still unconscious and will be taken to a local medical facility. They showed Bryan getting bagged last week. They had an inset interview with DiBiase, who said he hoped Cody Rhodes was watching because he’s going to beat Bryan badly tonight. Arm-drag by Bryan and Bryan caught DiBiase on a leap-frog attempt and took him down by the leg. Surfboard by Bryan into a pin for attempt. Dropkick and a beauty by DiBiase. Bryan went to the outside, and they went to break about 1:45 in. Good thing they didn’t take a break when Henry went outside during the first match!
Back at 6:17 of the match, with Bryan working out of a headlock. Slingshot clothesline by DiBiase for two. Cole said it was 110 in Phoenix today, and Booker said it felt like 120. Really? Can Booker really tell the difference between 110 and 120 degrees? Back to a rear chinlock by DiBiase. I wonder if Mathews wonders each week how he’ll work “power” into the broadcast to plug KMart. Running clothesline by Bryan, then a running dropkick in the corner for two. Bryan started getting pumped up, kicking DiBiase in the chest. DiBiase countered into a roll-up, by Bryan grabbed the arm and tried the LeBell Lock. DiBiase got to the ropes at 9:00 to break. Bryan back-dropped DiBiase to ringside. Bryan went to the apron and dove onto DiBiase, but DiBiase caught him, rammed him back-first into the ring post, then into the barricade. Bryan held his shoulder and screamed in pain. Back in the ring, a pin attempt got two at 10:17. Some trash talk by DiBiase in the corner, then a slap to the face. The referee admonished DiBiase for keeping Bryan in the corner. He set Bryan up on the top rope, but Bryan blocked a suplex. He headbutted DiBiase down and landed a missile dropkick off the top. Both men were down at 11:50. Back to a vertical base, Bryan slapped at DiBiase and took his head off with a kick for a very near-fall. Bryan continued to sell the right shoulder. Bryan got booted in the face in the corner, but countered Dream Street. He also countered another slingshot clothesline and grabbed a front facelock, wrapping his legs around DiBiase’s torso. DiBiase tapped.
WINNER: Bryan, at 13:08. Really nice match between these two. DiBiase’s stock should be rising with his latest string of performances.
Bryan got his music after the match.
- Backstage, Christian returned to Long’s office with the contract, saying it looks like the signing will happen after all. Long said “word on the street” is Christian was seen leaving the production truck after Big Show’s music magically played. Christian said he was on his phone with a good friend and that Long could check his phone if he wanted. Long said the contract signing will take place, but first, he’ll face Sin Cara.
- They showed the Phoenix skyline as Mathews previewed the contract signing.
- A sweaty Ted DiBiase was walking backstage. He walked up to Cody Rhodes and Cody asked him if he knew the significance of May 20. He said that was the last time DiBiase won a match. He derided DiBiase for losing to a “common man” like Daniel Bryan. Rhodes said if he can’t stop losing, he might as well wear one of these – then he handed DiBiase a paper bag and walked off.
- The announcers were shown and Cole said he wished Rhodes was his life coach. Then they turned to the Jinder Mahal/Great Khali situation. They showed a clip of five weeks ago, where Khali turned on his brother/manager Ranjin Singh.
- In an inset interview, Singh said before Mahal’s family amassed their wealth, the two families were close. But he said Mahal was jealous of Great Khali’s fame. He said years ago, Mahal became his brother-in-law. He said the Mahal family paid for his sister’s dowry when she married Jinder. Apparently Jinder has threatened to humiliate the family and divorce their sister unless Khali listens to him. Singh said we should fear Jinder Mahal. While the inset aired, they showed clips of Mahal and Khali together on WWE TV over the past few weeks. It was a nice diversion from the usual “send it to the interviewer backstage where he talks to a guy with a mic in his face.”
- Next, Christian vs. Cara.
- A hype video on Cara aired before break.
3 – CHRISTIAN vs. SIN CARA
Kane, Sin Cara, Dainel Bryan, Wade Barrett, Cody Rhodes, Justin Gabriel, Heath Slater, and Sheamus were shown as being in the Smackdown portion of MITB. Really? Gabriel and Slater? That’s weak, especially since they barely beat the Usos (after losing to them the week before). Also, does it spoil things not having Henry in there, that he will end up in the title match? Or is he not included as punishment for attacking a crew member, which is the direction they should go with it, to show there are consequences for actions?
Cara got Christian off-balance to start things as Christian took his time on the outside. “Are you trying to embarrass me? I can’t see with these lights!” Christian yelled from ringside, bringing up a solid point as they went to break.
Back at 3:53 of the match, with Christian in control. Cara came back and did a slingshot spinning cross-body onto Christian at ringside. Christian took back control in the ring. The briefcase ominously hung over-head during the match. Cara did his flip wrist-lock take-over. Pin got two. Christian dumped Cara over the top rope and to the outside. Cole went Larry Zbyszko, saying that’s what happens to the high-fliers, “they run out of gas and go ‘splat.’” Christian put the boots to Cara, then applied a rear chinlock. Crowd got behind Cara, but Christian slammed him. He stepped on Cara’s back with Cara’s throat across the middle rope. To the top went Christian, but he missed a diving headbutt. Springboard back-elbow by Cara. Cara got on Christian’s shoulders and it appeared neither man knew what the other was doing, so they circled around a bit and Cara rolled Christian up for two. Kick to the back of the head by Cara with Christian perched on the middle rope. Christian knocked him off, but Cara rolled and flipped to where it didn’t hurt him. Christian went to ringside, having seen enough of the unorthodox Cara. Back in the ring, Cara got a near-fall, but Christian landed an inverted DDT for two. Springboard back elbow attempt, but Christian caught him and tried a Killswitch. Cara has his leg pulled out from underneath him as he tried to go to the top, and Christian ran at him with a spear. Three-count ensued, and the first loss for Cara.
WINNER: Christian, at 11:44. Cara had to lose sometime, and doing it to the guy who will be challenging for the World Title at a PPV doesn’t hurt him, but it helps Christian. Match was disjoined in spots, but still enjoyable.
- Tonight is the contract signing between Randy Orton and Christian.
- They showed a clip from two weeks ago at Capitol Punishment, where Ezekiel Jackson beat Wade Barrett for the Intercontinental Championship.
- Jackson takes on Cody Rhodes next.
4 – CODY RHODES vs. EZEKIEL JACKSON
Once again, Booker got a bag from Cody’s bag men. Mathews talked about following Zeke’s Twitter. I’m sure it’s full of deep thoughts. Clean break by Jackson in the corner, but Jackson soon after grabbed Rhodes by the throat and took him down with a shoulder tackle. Beal out of the corner put Rhodes on his back. DiBiase was at ringside with Rhodes. Hard shot to the back by Jackson, then an elbowdrop for two. Jackson lifted Rhodes over his head for a slam, but Rhodes fought out, escaped out of the ring, then under it. DiBiase distracted Jackson, allowing Rhodes to come out and bop Jackson, then throw him into the ring post. Mathews explained the origin of the phrase “shoots the half” to Cole, who admitted to not understanding what it meant. And how many times has Cole used that phrase? Rhodes had Jackson down on the mat and tried to keep him there. Jackson lifted Rhodes up for a suplex and just tossed him front-first into the mat. Big running clothesline on Cody in the corner, then a slam. DiBiase got on the apron and Jackson ran him into the ring-post. That allowed Cody to land a springboard enziguiri, then hit Cross-Rhodes for the win.
WINNER: Rhodes, at 4:07. Hey look, another champion losing a non-title match. What a shocker.
After the match, Rhodes assured DiBiase that he did the right thing.
- Another reminder that the contract signing between Orton and Christian is still to come tonight.
[Commercial Break - if they’re going to run the same Domino’s commercial during every break, I’m glad they’ve actually moved on to a funny one.]
- Mathews plugged WWEPoker.com and where to leave feedback for the new games.
- Johnny Curtis was backstage painting, but what we couldn’t see what he was doing. He apologized for coming off whiny or bitter lately. He said he’d stop to avoid painting himself into a corner. He showed his painting, and yep, it was a stick figure in the upper right-hand corner. And it was helpfully labeled “myself.”
- The Raw Rebound aired. They even replayed Punk’s naughty interview. Back to the arena, Michael Cole said CM Punk had been indefinitely suspended after the event. Cole said Punk said much worse later. Cole said rumors have been swirling that Mr. McMahon will be at Raw this Monday to address the situation.
- Kane came out for a match. It’s next.
5 – KANE vs. WADE BARRETT
Barrett still has the Corre theme music. Both of these men are in the MITB Ladder Match. The announcers talked about Kane winning last year and cashing it in the same night. Shoulder knock-down by Kane for two. Barrett worked the arm of Kane and a clothesline surprisingly floored the Big Red Monster. Barrett put his head down and Kane kicked him in the top of his skull. Barrett rolled to ringside and Kane went after him. Lots of action outside the ring this week. Barrett, in the ring, kicked Kane off the apron and to ringside. They went to break at 2:15 of the match.
Back at 5:31 of the contest. Kane back suplexed out of a precarious situation. He ran into a back elbow from Barrett, who kicked Kane in the gut then in the head. Only a one-count off of that. Running boot to the seated Kane by Barrett. Cole speculated that Sheamus, due to the punt by Orton a few weeks ago, may not be ready in time for MITB. Knee strikes from Barrett with Kane wrapped-up in the ropes. Again, Barrett could only keep Kane down for a one-count. DDT by Barrett, which the audio sweetener loved, for a near-fall. Elbowdrop off the second rope missed the mark at 8:40. Kane fired back with rights then a cross-body. Impressive! Low dropkick from the big man for two. Big boot caught Barrett coming off the ropes. Sidewalk slam from Kane for two. Clothesline off the top by Kane, but Barrett avoided a chokeslam and a Tombstone to hit a swinging side slam for two. Kane got out of Wasteland and dodged a Barrett boot. Chokeslam finished it.
WINNER: Kane, at 11:24. Serviceable big man vs. big man match, but I don’t think it did anything to convince doubting fans that either of these two have a chance at MITB, especially with the way they’ve been portrayed lately.
- They replayed Mark Henry getting counted out, then attacking the audio technician. Clearly, this is the “big, lasting moment” they want us to remember from this show.
- Orton. Christian. Contract signing. Next.
[Commercial Break- A #1 Contender’s Match between Rey Mysterio, R-Truth and Alberto Del Rio in a Triple Threat Match was advertised for Raw this Monday.]
- Teddy Long was in the ring. Thank God they fixed the music so I wasn’t deprived of his theme! Long introduced the #1 Contender, Christian. A bald man, in a suit jacket that looked a little big for him, walked out with Christian. Without addressing the mystery man, Long introduced Randy Orton. The ring was all black – the black carpeting, black chairs, black table. The two wrestlers sat at opposite sides of the table. Christian said his counsel has reviewed the contract an inserted a clause that said if the referee screws Christian, he’ll get an immediate rematch. “I know I can beat you,” Christian repeated. Orton made a snide remark, upsetting Christian, who told Orton to shut his mouth. He said Orton is WWE’s Golden Boy, but they can’t save him anymore. We’re getting into CM Punk territory here. Christian said Orton can’t beat him, and at MITB, he’s going to prove it.
Orton said there was a time when he enjoyed facing Christian in the ring. He said there was a time he respected Christian and talked about their great encounters of the recent past. He said it’s “comical” how Christian keeps begging for rematches. But all of “this” was starting to make him angry, and he reminded Christian that he’s had problems managing his anger in the past. He said a lawyer isn’t going to get him a World Heavyweight Title shot. He said Christian beating him will never, ever happen. Orton then signed the contract, then slid it to Christian who handed it to the suit. He reviewed it, then whispered something to Christian as Orton became visibly agitated. Christian took his time in signing and as he readied to, the pen appeared to be out of ink. Out from the crowd ran Sheamus, who beat the crap out of Sheamus. Christian got in Sheamus’s face, so Sheamus shoved him off and gave him the Brogue Kick. Orton got up and went for the RKO, but Sheamus Brogue Kicked him instead. He grabbed the contract and ripped it up. Phew, I was afraid he was going to add his name to it. Instead, he just left the ring and headed up the ramp as Christian and Orton lay injured in the ring.
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Greg Parks has been covering WWE Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. His audio show, “Gonzo and The Greg,” is available for download on the Torch VIP page. Give it a listen! Comments, questions and feedback are welcome, and can be sent to email@example.com.
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