WWE Smackdown Report PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 5/6: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of the show, including Christian's Championship Celebration
May 6, 2011 - 9:00:57 PM
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WWE Smackdown review
May 6, 2011
Taped 5/3/11 in Orlando, Fla.
Aired on SYFY
By Greg Parks, PWTorch Columnist
- WWE Open.
- Clips aired of Christian and his travels that led him to his first World Heavyweight Title win at Extreme Rules. The voice-over man narrated things. Tonight is Christian’s Championship Celebration.
- Tony Chimel welcomed Christian into the arena in Orlando. Josh Mathews and Booker T. agreed that Christian’s career is now validated. Michael Cole butted in, saying Edge’s distraction led to Christian’s win. Once in the ring, with a mic, Christian said he’s been waiting 17 long years to do this: HE then hoisted the title belt, with his name on it, over his head. Christian said all of his dreams paled in comparison to the feeling of standing in front of them as champion. Christian said right before he came out tonight, he got a text message from Edge. He began to get choked up as he relayed Edge’s message, which told Christian to enjoy the moment. He said he was enjoying every single second of it. Christian reminisced about their storied past and said without Edge, there’s no Christian. He thanked his long-time friend and said he loves him. The WWE Universe was next to get props, specifically, his peeps. Christian said Edge told everyone that the title belongs to all the fans, not any one individual. Mark Henry’s music interrupted. “Oh thank God,” said Cole.
Henry headed to the ring, no longer wearing the jolly red outfit. Henry wanted the title, but Christian said there wasn’t any chocolate under the Gold. Henry said Edge is no longer around to protect him. Great Khali’s music interrupted and he came out with Ranjin Singh. Khali confronted Christian in the ring and spoke in his native tongue. Singh translated, as Khali congratulated Christian, but was hoping Christian would accept a challenge from a former World Champion, someone who has been through the jungles, that being the Great Khali. Christian said if another freak came out, they could join the circus. Instead, Randy Orton’s music hit and he walked out. Crowd was hot for Smackdown’s biggest superstar. He went to the ring and said he’s no freak, but he is Randy Orton. He said he’s new to the brand, but he’s not going to let this opportunity pass him by, so he wanted Christian to throw his name into the hat for the title. Teddy Long’s music interrupted and the Smackdown GM came out. He said he won’t make the decision as to who faces Christian, but he’ll leave it up to the WWE Universe in Orlando. That’s incredibly arbitrary and not fair at all. The crowd chanted “Randy, Randy,” so you knew who they were gonna choose. Christian vs. Mark Henry got boos, as did Christian vs. Great Khali. Christian vs. Orton got the win, so Long made it for tonight. This is like that segment on Raw a few weeks back, where it seems like anyone at all could’ve come from the back and make a legitimate (or not so legitimate) argument for getting a title shot, and they’d have just as much an opportunity as anyone else. It’s absurd.
- Tonight, the Rock’s birthday from Raw will be re-lived tonight.
- Mathews plugged ringside photos of Extreme Rules on WWE.com.
- Khali and Singh were walking backstage. Singh said Khali was close and he’ll get another chance eventually. They again ran into Jinder Mahal and Mahal said now that he’s here, things will get a lot better. Khali walked off and Singh said it’s nice to see Mahal, but Khali is his brother and he’s got his career on track. Mahal mentioned the tutu on Raw. Singh tried to defend it, but Mahal interrupted and said he wasn’t condemning Singh, just making a comment. He patted Singh on the back and walked away. They seem to be hinting at a previous relationship between Mahal and Singh (and/or Khali).
1 – SHEAMUS vs. DANIEL BRYAN
Mathews said Daniel Bryan is like the Ryan Reynolds of WWE, because he’s athletically gifted. That’s an interesting observation, since you don’t usually here Reynolds referred to as “athletically gifted.” Sheamus aggressively went after Bryan, still angry from his US Title loss on Sunday. Bryan and Sheamus went back-and-forth in the corner. Bryan flipped away from danger, and caught Sheamus with a light dropkick that sent the Irishman to the outside. Bryan dove through the middle ropes and onto Sheamus. The men traded blows on the outside, but Sheamus, from inside, whipped Bryan, on the apron, into the ring post. Back in the ring, back-breaker by Sheamus. They went to break at 1:52 of the match.
Back at 5:58 of the match. Bryan was working out of a rest-hold. Bryan walked right into a back-breaker, the second one we’ve seen so far in this match. Sheamus, from the apron, gave Bryan a knee-lift as Bryan was draped between the ropes. Shoulder tackle by Sheamus for two. Bryan blocked a second-rope suplex and landed a dropkick at 7:50 to even the score. Both men got to their feet until Bryan used his patented kicks to his advantage. Booker wondered whether Bryan had karate or kung fu in his background based on those kicks. Sheamus set Bryan up for Pale Justice, but Bryan countered. Sheamus went for another diving shoulder tackle, but Bryan dodged it, grabbed the arm, and applied the LeBell Lock. Sheamus was close enough to the ropes to grab them. Sheamus went to the outside and Bryan was about to dive through the ropes at him. As he attempted it, Sheamus pump kicked him, knocking him for a loop. Back in the ring, Sheamus with another Brogue Kick, this time for the win.
WINNER: Sheamus, at 9:43. Good match, and nice finishing sequence. Too bad Bryan couldn’t get the win here, but they may be positioning Sheamus to be one of, if not the top heel on the brand.
- Christian defends his newly-won World Heavyweight Championship tonight against Randy Orton.
- They showed the Orlando skyline as Mathews mentioned Christian’s first title defense tonight, against Randy Orton.
- Cody Rhodes came out in a suit. His assistants followed him, with paper bags for the fans. The ring was darkened as Rhodes began to speak in a monotone voice. He said there is a common expression that goes, “adding insult to injury.” He said that’s what Rey Mysterio did at Extreme Rules, searing his eyes with mist. “I HATE that it will reflect as a loss for me in the record, but I did expose Rey Mysterio,” he said. Rhodes said Rey was desperate, gutless and a coward. He said that thankfully, he won’t have to deal with the malevolence that Rey brings, as he’s been drafted to Raw. Cody said his eyes are still burning, they’re still bothering him. Good thing Rey went to Raw, or else a blindfold match between the two may have been next. Rhodes said he can still see that everyone in the crowd is ugly. He said as a service to them, and at great expense to him, he’ll provide them with paper bags. “Great expense?” I can’t imagine paper bags costing an arm and/or a leg. He requested that everyone hide their hideousness. Cody said his face may repulse them, but their ugliness offends him. Cole said Rhodes is becoming more and more estranged from society. Good promo again here from Cody, but it didn’t set anything up for the future. Still, good that he commented on his loss to Rey.
- Stills from Sunday aired, as it pertains to Corre and their strained relationship.
- Big Show came out for a match against Ezekiel Jackson. Jackson was flanked by the Corre on his way to the ring. Before the match could start, Kane came to the ring to provide back-up for Big Show. The mention will commence after the break.
2 – THE BIG SHOW vs. EZEKIEL JACKSON
Match was joined in progress, but it didn’t appear very far along, as they were locking up. The two men stalled a bit, until Show took Jackson down with a rear waist-lock. However, Jackson back body-dropped Show. He put the boots to Show as Booker T. said something about this being the first time he’s seen Show on his back. I’ll assume I mis-heard him. Jackson then picked Show up and bodyslammed him. Rear chin-lock by Jackson, as he didn’t waste time going after the big man. Kane showed concern at ringside. Show came back and both men were down just over 2:00 in. The two got to their knees and traded rights. Show went for body shots, then clotheslined Jackson down. And another. Big splash by Show in the corner, then a shoulder tackle. Heath Slater got on the apron to distract, but Kane took him down. He put Justin Gabriel down too, but Wade Barrett gave him a big boot. Corre pounded on Kane until Show came out and cleaned house. Show went back into the ring, but by then, Jackson had recovered. One big clothesline later, and it was over.
WINNER: Jackson, 3:32 shown. This got over Jackson’s power, though he didn’t really do anything we hadn’t seen before. That said, the match was not as bad as one might expect.
Jackson walked to the back, away from Corre, who were still in the ring. Aren’t they doing the EXACT same thing with Mason Ryan and Nexus on Raw? And, big shock, both guys are muscle-heads who are limited athletically.
- Highlights from Rock’s birthday celebration are still to come.
- More shots of downtown Orlando, and the Amway Center, as Mathews sent it to clips of Rock’s birthday celebration from Raw. Snippets from all the celebs aired as well. They seemed to work backward, showing Rock’s video and Vince McMahon first, then ending with the Rock Bottom on Cole. This video clocked in at about 5:00.
- Tonight, Randy Orton challenges Christian for the World Title.
3 – LAYLA vs. ALICIA FOX
Fox was shaking it even more so than usual on her way to the ring. Hey, it’s part of the job to notice things like that. Fox was on the offensive to start, and she hammered away on her opponent in the corner. Layla came back with kicks and connected on her neck-breaker. Cover, reminiscent of Maryse, for the win.
WINNER: Layla, at :53. Not much to say. Too short really, but it appears Layla is playing the babyface, as expected, now.
Before Layla could celebrate too much, Kharma’s music played and she came out. Of course, the women in the ring were mesmerized by her. At least Maryse was too injured to leave the ring on Raw. What’s the excuse for these ladies? Cole did say it’s almost as if Kharma hypnotizes them, which would somewhat explain the fact that they don’t high-tail it out. Kharma entered the ring, and Layla wisely left. She eyed Layla as she made her way up the ramp, so Fox came up from behind Kharma and kicked in her the ribs. It had no effect, other than to annoy Kharma. “Kharma is looking at her like she’s a chicken bone,” said Booker. Kharma caught a second kick attempt, and clotheslined Fox down. Implant Buster on Fox. Kharma did her Hugh Morris thing as the crowd (or perhaps the audio sweetener) buzzed with interest. Slight chant of “one more time.”
- Corre was walking backstage when they came upon Zeke Jackson. They confronted him, asking him what his problem was. Barrett said their problem is that they can’t let it be seen as if he’s walking away from them. Barrett said he wanted to make sure Jackson saw this one coming. Jackson stood up, then gave Barrett a forearm shiver to the face. The rest of Corre pounded on him and kept him down. They ended up tipping over what appeared to be a laundry bin onto Jackson. They left him lying, with the bin on top of him.
- They showed a replay of Jackson and Corre’s brawl. The announcers then discussed the incident on camera. Hey, Chavo Guerrero is on commentary!
4 – SIN CARA vs. TYSON KIDD
They competed under the special Sin Cara lighting. Cara did some flips early, then took Cara down with a headscissors after going around the world about two times. Chavo took credit for doing pretty much all of these moves early on, earlier in his career. Kidd kicked Cara outside the ring, and suplexed him onto the ringside mat. Crowd, mostly kids, chanted for Cara. Kidd choked Cara in the ropes, but missed a catapult leg-drop. Handspring back-elbow by Cara, then another headscissors. Springboard cross-body for two. Kidd set himself on the top rope, and tried to bring Cara up. Cara kicked him in the head as Chavo accused Cara of stealing his moves. C4 off the top by Cara for the win. Chavo questioned who that move hurt more. Seeing as Kidd was PINNED because of the move, I’d say it was him.
WINNER: Cara, at 2:48. Sounds like we’re getting a Chavo vs. Cara feud. I’m not going to complain about that. Chavo has experience with that style and he can put Cara over.
In the ring after the match, Chavo extended his hand to Cara. Cara shook it and the two backed away.
- We saw the Be A Star anti-bullying campaign video from Raw. I think they set a record for celebrities on the show on Monday night with this video and the video birthday tributes for Rock.
- Todd Grisham was backstage with Teddy Long. He asked Long if it was fair for Christian to defend his title tonight. Long said it’s not about what’s fair, it’s about satisfying the WWE Universe. Ironic, given what happens in the match. He said his job was to make Smackdown as exciting and unpredictable as it can be.
- Disney World was shown as an Orlando-area landmark as Mathews said dreams come true there, much like Christian’s dream came true on Sunday.
5 – RANDY ORTON vs. CHRISTIAN – WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Christian barely cleared Orton on a leap-frog, and it may have earned him some harsh words from Steve Austin or Bill DeMott were he on Tough Enough. Orton grabbed Christian and from overhead, reigned blows down upon his chest. He set up for the rope-assisted DDT at about 1:15 of the match, but Christian dumped Orton over the top rope and to the outside. Christian with a baseball slide through the ropes, but he missed a dive over the top. They went to break 1:43 in.
Back 5:29 into the match. Orton was still in control. Mathews said Orton has pinpointed the bruises Christian suffered on Sunday, and he’s taking advantage of them. Rear waist-lock by Orton, designed to wear down the champion. Christian fought back with rights, but he missed a clothesline. Orton clotheslined Christian over the top and to ringside, and he went tumbling out to. Break again, at 7:55 of the match.
At 11:19 of the match, they returned from break. Christian caught a foot to the back of his head from Orton on that spill before the break. Orton headbutted Christian in the ring, but succumbed to a back elbow for a two-count. Both men were down at 12:22. The two volleyed back and forth on the their feet, and a big dropkick turned things Orton’s way. He dialed it up with some big clotheslines. Christian countered and hit his spin kick in the corner. Dropkick off the second rope for two. Orton tossed Christian over the top, but Christian held on and brought Orton’s throat down over the top rope. Cross-body off the top for a near-fall at 14:05. He went to the opposite corner and hit a European uppercut off the top rope. Orton with a powerslam for two. Both men’s gauges looked to be near “E.” Christian set up for the Killswitch, but Orton dodged it. Christian missed his punch from outside the ring and Orton DDT’d Christian from between the ropes. Orton was irate when Christian kicked out. The camera showd a close-up of both men’s faces. Olympic Slam countered into a reverse DDT for only two. Olympic slam finally connected, and Orton pounded the mat, ready to strike for the finish. Christian countered it and Orton countered his finisher. Christian went for his springboard sunset flip, but Orton connected on the RKO, in mid-air, in the middle of the ring to become the new champion.
WINNER: Orton, at 17:18. I don’t think anyone expected Christian to be the long-term champion, but I’m sure some are surprised that he didn’t really even get a chance to carry the ball.
Orton celebrated on the ramp with his newly-won belt, as Christian struggled to come to grips with the loss in the ring. He got to his feet, but didn’t exactly get a rousing ovation. There it is, as he left the ring. The crowd did seem more pro-Orton than pro-Christian during the match, though we don’t know how much WWE tinkered with the audio. Christian slowly made his way up the ramp as the camera stayed on him from afar. He rubbed his head in frustration as the show faded out.
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Greg Parks has been covering WWE Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. His new audio show, “Gonzo and The Greg,” is available for download on the Torch VIP page. Give it a listen! Comments, questions and feedback are welcome, and can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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