WWE Raw Report CALDWELL'S WWE RAW RESULTS 12/12: Complete "virtual-time" coverage of live three-hour Raw - Henry vs. Cena, Slammys, final TLC hype
Dec 12, 2011 - 10:05:16 PM
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WWE Raw Supershow Results
December 12, 2011 - Episode #967
Live in Norfolk, Va.
Aired on USA Network
Report by James Caldwell, PWTorch assistant editor
This week's live three-hour WWE Raw started with video package looking back to past Slammy moments documenting "excellence in entertainment." Tonight, the 2011 Slammys Award show looking back through the past year. An MTV Awards-sounding voice-over introduced the show before pyro shot off live inside the arena. Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler ringside for commentary.
On-stage: Booker T, flanked by Eve, came out first to introduce the first Slammy award of the show, the "Tell Me I Did Not Just See That" award. Hornswoggle, flanked by Alicia Fox, came out next to join Booker. Swoggle was sporting big hair for some reason. Booker and Swoggle introduced the award before Swoggle predicted Booker putting a beating on Cody Rhodes at TLC on Sunday. The award candidates: Jim Ross dancing in the Michael Cole Challenge, Santino nearly winning the Royal Rumble, R-Truth losing a title match due to a Little Jimmy, and The Miz dressing up as The Rock.
Back live, Booker and Swoggle announced Ross as the winner. Out came Ross live on Raw to accept the award. Ross stepped to the podium, waited out "JR, JR" chants, and said he never thought he would win a Slammy for getting jiggy with it. Suddenly, Michael Cole jumped out of his announce chair and stepped into the ring to complain about this. Cole said Ross beat him in a dance contest that was obviously rigged and he's accepting an award for it. Cole made a fat joke, then Booker called Cole a loser. Booker said he thinks Ross could beat Cole right now in a rap-off.
Booker and Hornswoggle then led Ross to the ring as Cole paced around eagerly anticipating this moment. Booker stepped up to Cole and said since Cole thinks he's so good and so slick, they're going to let Cole go first. Cole just walked around with his hand on his hop before declaring he's going to freestyle rap. Cue up some music that was previously used for Divas segments. Cole moved around to get a feel for his rap. Fat jokes a plenty here. The crowd booed, but Cole kept going. Cole finished that Ross just got schooled by Vintage Cole.
Booker called that the worst rap he's ever heard in his life. Booker asked for Ross's music. Ross went through a few lines, tried to think on his feet to recover, and then just said the heck with it to tell Cole to kiss his ass. Booker declared Ross the winner based on the fan vote. Ross held up his Slammy in Cole's face before Boomer Sooner played again. Ross tried to leave, but Booker held him back. The crowd has seen the Spinarooni, but the fans want to see a JR-rooni. "Jim Ross" and "Hornswoggle" popped up on the screen as trending right now. Booker demonstrated the spin-a-rooni before Ross took his time warming up, did Booker's five-time, five-time several times before selling a heart attack and spinning on his back. Cole called it the worst thing ever. Booker said it's better than Cole could ever do.
[Q2] Still to come: Superstar of the Year revealed with candidates Cena, Miz, Henry, Punk, Del Rio, and Orton.
Backstage: Mick Foley was spotted backstage. He's handing out the next Slammy. Cole complained about the show going from Ross to Foley.
On-stage: Mick Foley and "Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase came out on-stage sporting the same hair and beard combination to present the next award. Foley threw some money into the air before they introduced the Slammy for "Holy (bleep) Moment of the Year." DiBiase stole Foley's cheap pop referencing Virginia. Foley then tried to figure out why they were paired up together. DiBiase said he's an ordained minister, so he's the holy part and Foley is the...DiBiase cackled at this revelation.
After a rundown of the candidates, they revealed the Big Show-Mark Henry ring collapse as the winner. Big Show came out to accept the award. Foley and DiBiase walked off, leaving Big Show. Show thanked the "Academy" and noted Henry is probably afraid of him right now. He said the World Title belt would look real good next to his Slammy award, promoting their title match at TLC on Sunday. Show said he's done talking and he's ready to bash someone's head in right now.
Show stomped out to the ringside area, where various weapons were assembled. They took a look at Smackdown to see Show smash Henry's injured leg with a chair. Wade Barrett then came out to face Show. But, before he made his way to the ring, Barrett stopped on the stage to cut a promo on Randy Orton ahead of their TLC match. Barrett then told Show that if he wins the World Title from Henry at TLC, he will be coming after Show next. They cut to break ahead of the opening match.
1 -- BIG SHOW vs. WADE BARRETT
They returned from break with the match already in progress. Barrett was on the floor, so Show followed to the outside. They teased a table spot before Barrett climbed to the top rope for a splash onto Big Show, but Show stood up and Barrett simply stood his ground on the top turnbuckle. Show then smashed the table a la a baseball player smashing a bat over his leg. Back in the ring, Barrett tried to use a steel chair, but Show punched the chair. The ref called for the bell, then Show clotheslined Barrett over the top rope. Barrett ran away and Show sold an injury to his hand.
WINNER: Show via DQ at 1:37 of what aired. Smackdown heels should avoid Raw at all costs since the booking on Monday nights does not favor them. At least Barrett picked up some promo time to call it a wash on the night.
Still to come tonight: John Cena vs. Mark Henry. And, Superstar of the Year.
Tribute to the Troops plug: The promo video focused on celebrity messages and the celebrity performances airing on tomorrow night's special.
TLC plug: Triple H vs. Kevin Nash. Will they destroy each other once the sledgehammer comes into play?
Back live, Justin Roberts introduced the Road Dogg Jesse James, making his WWE TV return. Dogg came out with Eve and Alicia Fox doing his DX dance. Lawler called him a huge part of the Attitude Era. At the podium, Dogg introduced himself via rhyme. He mixed in the traditional DX intro to set up the Pipe Bomb of the Year candidates.
(1) R-Truth referencing the wrong city. (2) Santino and Fake Obama. (3) Stone Cold and C.M. Punk promo exchange. (4) Anything R-Truth said as a heel. (5) Anything Booker T said on commentary. (6) The Rock and John Cena's pre-Survivor Series promo exchange. (7) C.M. Punk and Kevin Nash's promo exchange. (8) Fink announcing C.M. Punk at Survivor Series. (9) Sheamus and Beaker. (10) Rock, Mean Gene, and Pee Wee Herman. (11) Ryder's YouTube videos. (12) Laurinaitis stumbling over himself. (13) Teddy Long trying to get out the mouthy descriptions for Smackdown. (14) Punk looking for ice cream bears.
Back live, Dogg announced C.M. Punk as the winner. Out came Punk with a mannequin. Punk accepted the award from Dogg, then placed his Laurinaitis mannequin (complete with a Dynamic Dudes t-shirt). Punk said he wants to shed light on a cause. He wants to recognize someone who works hard every day at what he does. He said this person deserves an honor all his own. Punk said this person is boring, completely bland, lacking in human characteristics, and devoid of manparts. Punk asked the crowd to honor a legend - a tribute to John Laurinaitis.
[Q4] Cue up a mock tribute video set to 1980s song "The Touch" by Stan Bush incorporating recent clips and old-school Dynamic Dudes clips. They showed Laurinaitis as Johnny Ace hitting the weights, riding his skateboard, hanging with Shane Douglas, getting smashed by a Jim Cornette racket, and other classic clips. The video ended with a graphic awarding Ace the Lifetime Achievement Award. Punk did Laurinaitis's voice thanking everyone for the award.
Still to come tonight: Punk & Orton vs. Miz & Del Rio in a match just announced.
DVD plug: King of the Ring hosted by Booker T, available tomorrow.
On-stage: Justin Roberts introduced Lita to announce the next award for most Divalicious Moment of the Year. Interesting that Lita is on the show a few days after being arrested. Lita said she's had an entire career full of Divalicious Moments, then introduced the candidates, including a Kharma flashback. Kelly Kelly was announced as the winner, then Beth Phoenix and Natalya interrupted, taking exception to this decision. Kelly then reached back and slapped Beth, who tried to steal her Slammy. The heels backed off before Kelly and Lita stood tall to close the segment.
Announcers: Cole and Lawler reset the show before introducing a "WWE '12" video game clip of Mark Henry vs. John Cena to promote the main event later tonight.
On-stage: Back to Roberts, who introduced Santino to announce the OMG! Moment of the Year. Before Santino could talk, the Bella Twins came out to join Santino. After a bit about "OMG" being a word, Santino introduced the candidates leading into the top of the hour.
[Q5 -- Second Hour/Standard First Hour] The candidates included Triple H tombstoning The Undertaker at WM27 and Taker kicking out and C.M. Punk taking the WWE Title at MITB. Back live, Santino announced the winner as Taker kicking out of the Tombstone. Suddenly, Triple H's music hit and this is how they reintroduced him on TV.
Hunter, in street clothes and showing no signs of being the on-air COO, slowly walked out on-stage holding a sledgehammer in one hand and water bottle in the other. Hunter, showing he's recovered from Nash's attack, stomped out to the ring as the crowd cheered. In the ring, Hunter shed his jacket and Lawler noted Nash is watching this right now. Once Hunter's music stopped, he paced around the ring trying to encourage a louder reaction. Hunter then spoke that the OMG Moment was not what everyone saw, but a short period of time after the match when Taker, for the first time in his career, could not leave the ring under his own power. Hunter said the only man who walked out was him. Nine months later, Taker is no more, he claimed. Hunter also claimed The Streak came to an end. The crowd was unsettled by this.
Speaking of coming to an end, there's Kevin Nash. Hunter said he would like to see what Nash has done one more time. After a video clip from two months ago when Nash assaulted Hunter, they returned to the ring, where Hunter said that Nash should have finished the job because he's back. Hunter said he thinks their entire relationship is based on lies and deception. But, on Sunday, it's about Might Making Right. Hunter vowed to climb the ladder, retrieve the hammer, and bring the hammer on Nash over and over and over again. Hunter said this Sunday he will show the world that he is right and Nash is simply done. Hunter's music played and he left the ring as Cole hyped the match at the PPV. Hunter reached the top of the stage, where Santino was smiling and trying to hand him his Slammy award. Hunter scowled, then Santino became afraid and ran to the back so Hunter could pose on the stage.
Segment Reax: Interesting/somewhat odd return. The big money is a Taker-Hunter II re-match at WM28 that Hunter hinted at here, but Hunter confused the audience by dogging Taker before facing Nash at TLC on Sunday. The promo on Nash was decent-enough after the Taker bit.
[Commercial Break. Jamster is now advertising a Wrestling Nickname Generator via text message. They used a John Cena silhouette and Nickelback's Raw theme music for the spot, which could get a phone call unless it was approved ahead of time.]
[Q6] On-stage: David Otunga and a returning Tony Atlas came out on-stage to introduce the Trending Star of the Year. Otunga did his Abraham Washington bit laughing all the way through Otunga's intro. The crowd apparently didn't watch or doesn't remember WWECW since there was no reaction. Otunga said the four candidates will compete in a four-way tonight. Otunga finally asked what's so funny and Atlas said he's laughing at Otunga. Cue up a "trending" video package. Cody Rhodes, Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, and Zack Ryder were the four nominees.
In-ring: After one-and-a-half minutes of wrestling in the first hour, Zack Ryder came out first for the second match of the show. IC champion Cody Rhodes was out second, followed by Daniel Bryan, then U.S. champion Dolph Ziggler. Cole and Lawler plugged Ziggler-Ryder and Rhodes-Booker at the PPV on Sunday before the match started.
2 -- U.S. champion DOLPH ZIGGLER (w/Vickie Guerrero) vs. IC champion CODY RHODES vs. DANIEL BRYAN vs. ZACK RYDER -- four-way match
Instead of the match result determining who wins the Slammy, Cole said the person who trends first will win. WWE has officially relegated a WWE Wrestling Match to irrelevancy. They cut to break 50 seconds into the match after the faces hit big moves on the floor.
Back from break in a match that WWE said doesn't matter, Rhodes and Ryder were shown squaring off in the ring. Ryder delivered a Broski Boot for a two count as the heels remained out of the picture recovering on the floor. Bryan and Ryder then collided mid-ring and the heels scampered back into the ring, leading to a showdown. Kash and Aries decided to go after the faces instead of attacking each other, though, which drew boos.
The partnership broke down quickly, leading to a shoving match between Ziggler and Rhodes. Bryan tried to take advantage, but the heels cut him off. Bryan and Rhodes then traded rapid-fire pin attempts before Rhodes threw Bryan to the floor. Rhodes then threw Ryder to the outside and Ziggler tried to roll up Rhodes from behind, but Rhodes escaped. Rhodes followed with the Alabama Slam on Ziggler for a close two count. At 8:00, they cut to another break.
[Q7] Back from break, the men traded rapid-fire pinfall attempts before colliding mid-ring. After a breather, the announcers went overboard with Twitter references before Bryan went nuts with rapid-fire kicks and a running kick on Rhodes. Bryan then climbed up top and Rhodes crotched him. Ziggler then airballed a corner attack on Ryder, who went up top, where Ziggler cut him off. The result was the heels scoring superplexes from opposite corners, then all four men sold on the mat.
Ziggler and Rhodes were the first men to their feet and started trading blows. Suddenly, finishing moves started flying. Bryan tried the LeBell Lock on Rhodes for a submission win, but Ziggler grabbed Bryan for a sleeperhold. Bryan escaped, but took the Zig-Zag from behind. Ziggler with the pin on Bryan for the win. The announcers called it a great match-up.
WINNER: Ziggler at 15:20. It's too bad this match didn't matter since it was a strong bout despite the multiple commercial breaks.
Post-match: Lawler entered the ring to announce the winner of the Slammy. Drumroll. Pause. Lawler announced Zack Ryder as the Trending Star of the Year. Ziggler threw a fit, then dropped Ryder from behind with the Zig-Zag. Ziggler stole the Slammy and stood over Ryder before Ziggler's music hit. Cole then cut a promo on everyone making Ryder trend because all it got him was a Zig-Zag.
Still to come: Cena vs. Henry in the main event.
Back live, Justin Roberts introduced the "Gamechanger of the Year" award. Christian then made his return on crutches and sporting a neckbrace. Christian, now with full goatee, approached the podium to present an award not on the ballot this year. He awarded himself the Courageous Moment of the Year award for showing up despite multiple injuries. Christian then complained about not being nominated for Superstar of the Year with his multiple World Title wins. He then blamed each person in the audience for not showing enough outrage that he did not receive One More Match.
[Q8] Christian introduced the Gamechanger footage, starting with Vince McMahon "fired" as CEO, Edge retiring, Nash returning to take out C.M. Punk, and Rock and Cena squaring off. Back live, Christian announced the winner...The Rock challenges Cena to the main event of WM28. Cena's music then hit to bring out Cena for the first time on the show. Cena slowly approached Christian, who hobbled away before Cena surveyed the crowd. Once his music stopped, Cena waited out a loud mix of boos and cheers.
Cena said this award is not resting on the shoulders of one man, but because of a team. He's not taking credit for this entire award, then introduced The Rock to huge cheers. Oh wait, no Rock. The crowd booed once they realized Rock wasn't here. Cena pretended to be taken off-guard, then referenced Rock saying he would never leave. Cena sarcastically said he made an error. He then rolled a satellite clip. Oh wait, no satellite clip. Cena pretended to ask a stagehand why they don't have a clip. He then apologized for not only himself, but on behalf of Team Bring It for not bringing it. Cena said he knows Rock will eventually see this, so he hopes it fuels Rock's commitment to preparing for WM28. He said the real game-changing moment is April 1 in Miami. Cena promised he will be at his very best and he wants everyone to see Rock at his very best. Cena said this Slammy award means they changed the game for the year. At WM28, they change the game forever. Cue up Cena's music.
Still to come tonight: Cena vs. Henry. Up Next: Punk & Orton vs. Miz & Del Rio.
In-ring: Roberts announced a tag match as various weapons were shown around the ring. Ricardo Rodriguez, looking very tired, introduced Del Rio first. The Miz was out next just before the top of the third hour.
[Q9 -- third hour/standard second hour] With the heels in the ring, Randy Orton's music hit to start the final hour of Raw. Orton waited outside of the ring for Punk to come out and join him for the first of two main events on the show. Lawler and Cole played up a stacked deck against Punk at TLC having to face Miz and Del Rio in a three-way. The announcers suggested a pinfall or submission could determine the outcome, but it's a TLC match, which is essentially a ladder match with weapons.
3 -- WWE champion C.M. PUNK & RANDY ORTON vs. ALBERTO DEL RIO & THE MIZ
The announcers referenced Orton and Punk's feud earlier this year and noted everyone has been an adversary at some point this year. The announcers also revisited Christian's return earlier tonight while sporting a neckbrace, prompting Lawler to slip in an Andy Kaufman reference. The match settled into the heels isolating Orton as Cole ranted and raved about Ross forgetting his rap in the opening segment. Punk took a hot tag and cleaned house before calling for the GTS on Del Rio. Miz cut off Punk from behind, though, and the heels took control again leading to break.
Back from break, Miz and Del Rio tagged in and out wearing down Punk ahead of their TLC title match on Sunday. Cole again suggested the title match can only end by pinfall or submission. As Punk tried to break free to tag in Orton, Barrett came out of nowhere to jump Orton from behind on the ring apron. Punk was essentially left alone in a two-on-one situation. Miz then dropped Punk with the Skullcrushing Finale for the pin and the win. Cole declared Miz the Superstar of the Year and potential future WWE champion.
[Q10] Post-match: Orton hopped the guardrail to chase down Barrett in the crowd. This left Punk alone in the ring to take a beating from Miz and Del Rio using a ladder. Del Rio put Punk's left arm inside a ladder before applying the cross arm-breaker. Miz said they want to make sure Punk makes it to the PPV before one of them takes the WWE Title. Miz told Punk that his pipe bomb is going to explode in his face. Miz dropped the mic over Punk's head before his music hit. Miz and Del Rio stood tall as the announcers continued to stack the deck against Punk.
WINNERS: Miz & Del Rio at 12:40. Basic booking putting the face champion in jeopardy and giving the heels some needed credibility. It's odd they changed the TLC rules to basically a three-way match using weapons.
Announcers: Cole and Lawler were shown voting for Superstar of the Year. Naturally, Cole selected Miz before sending the show to break.
Kane Vignette: It was essentially the same video that aired before of Kane dropping his flaming mask. "Kane Resurrected" flashed on the screen.
WWE Network plug: The psychedelic Network video aired promoting WWE's new project. They added "Mean" Gene Okerlund to the Legends House plug. Back live, Cole read some marketing buzzwords about the Network.
On-stage: Vickie Guerrero was introduced to announce A-Lister of the Year. Goldust then joined her for the award presentation. Goldust tried to play with Vickie's hair, but she backed off. Goldust cracked a joke about Vickie wearing more make-up than him before rolling footage. The candidates for the award were The Muppets, Snooki, Cee-Lo Green, and Hugh Jackman. Back live, Vickie groaned before handing over the envelope to Goldust, who announced Snooki as the winner. Vickie said Snooki could not be here tonight, but Goldust said she recorded a message. Via Satellite, Snooki said the award is "freakin' awesome." She referenced her appearance at WM27 and gave a shout-out to Zack Ryder ahead of his TLC title match.
[Q11] Backstage: Josh Mathews brought in World Hvt. champion Mark Henry. Henry said if Big Show thinks he's seen all he has to offer, Show has another thing coming. He said he's not relinquishing the World Title. Henry then turned his attention to Cena, telling him not to worry about WM28 because he's getting inducted to the Hall of Pain tonight.
In-ring: Sheamus's music hit to bring out The Great White for an unannounced match. Cole offered a quick plug for Elimination Chamber in February, with tickets on-sale this Saturday. Jinder Mahal then came out as Sheamus's opponent. Mahal cut a promo in his native language as he walked to the ring. Mahal noted that Sheamus will play a supporting role to Mahal's Slammy-award winning performance tonight. As soon as Jinder entered the ring, Sheamus blasted him with a Brogue Kick. The ref checked on Mahal and Sheamus's music played. He just shrugged his shoulders and left the ring. So, no match.
Up Next: Superstar of the Year reveal.
On-stage: Rey Mysterio made a surprise return to announce Superstar of the Year. Mysterio wasn't on crutches, but walked with a slight limp from his multiple knee surgeries. Mysterio waited out a light "619, 619" chant from a tired and bored crowd before Rey tried to hype them up for the Superstar of the Year award. Mysterio did a speech about the fans deciding who wins this award before running down the nominees. Orton (cheers), Miz (boos), Punk (cheers on Orton's level), Del Rio (boos at Miz's level), Mark Henry (boos at Miz and Del Rio's level), and Cena (loud mix). Mysterio then unveiled the winner...C.M. Punk.
[Q12] Cult of Personality played to bring out Punk for his second Slammy award of the night. No sign of Punk, though. Instead, John Laurinaitis strolled out to the podium and shook Rey's hand. Ace shoved Rey aside and introduced himself to boos. Laurinaitis plugged the Punk-Del Rio-Miz title match at TLC and noted Punk is in no condition to appear right now. He accepted the award on Punk's behalf and triumphantly held up the Slammy.
Backstage: Henry was shown breathing heavily walking backstage ahead of the main event. Suddenly, the video cut out to this week's Raw Mystery Vignette. Apparently a mystery woman (the girl in the vignettes) will point to the big return. The boy sitting at the classroom desk in the previous vignettes voiced-over that "things will never be the same again." He said 1/2/12 will be the end of the world as you know it. The word "control" flashed on the screen. They cut to commercial.
Announcers: Cole and Lawler plugged the Tribute to the Troops special tomorrow night, which will feature footage of McMahon, the Bellas, and Kofi Kingston in Afghanistan. Cole and Lawler then shared a story about a soldier hugging McMahon for minutes because she wanted to be home with her son, who she had a picture of wearing a WWE Title belt. They cut to the son and the soldier's husband sitting ringside to send a message back to the solider watching Raw overseas.
In-ring: Mark Henry's music hit to bring out the World champ for the main event. Henry's ankle was heavily taped to continue selling his leg injury. John Cena then stormed the ring to face off against Henry.
4 -- World Hvt. champion MARK HENRY vs. JOHN CENA -- non-title match
After circling around each other, the two men locked up and Henry flung Cena clear across the ring. Cena collected himself on the ring apron and looked around the arena to sell he was in trouble. A dueling chant started up as they cut to break 40 seconds in.
Henry showed off his power coming back from break just before the top of the hour.
[Q13 -- over-run] Cena finally escaped and set up for the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena connected, then teased the Attitude Adjustment, but Henry collapsed on Cena's back. Henry made a cover, but Cena kicked out. Henry then went to a bear hug to continue wearing down Cena. Meanwhile, the crowd picked up a dueling chant trying to breathe life into this match. Henry then delivered a World's Strongest Slam, but Henry couldn't make an immediate cover.
Suddenly, pyro shot off and the lights went dark. Kane's music played and Kane re-emerged on-stage wearing a new mask that looked like a mask used by welders. Kane stomped out to the ring and Henry rolled out of the ring to avoid Kane, who Henry took out of action months ago. Cena then came to his feet and Kane gave him a chokeslam, which hushed the crowd. Kane stood over Cena, then his pyro shot off. Kane lowered his head, then removed the welder's mask to reveal a new Kane mask. He almost looked like Undertaker hiding behind the mask because he had long hair again. The hard camera zoomed in on Kane's glass eye to confirm it was Kane, plus he did his trademark crooked smile to confirm it was Kane. The show then faded to black with a close-up of Kane.
WINNER: No Decision when the show ended at 10:01. This felt like the Viewer's Choice Raw last year where the show dragged on for three hours before something significant happened at the very end. Back then, it was a 10-minute Nexus segment destroying the ring and this was a 30-second return of significant importance. Apparently a feud with Kane will give Cena something to do before WM28 season kicks off. Concerning this Sunday's PPV, WWE probably did more to turn away people from TLC because people probably don't want to spend another three hours with WWE this week after this exhausting, marathon session of a show.
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