TNA Impact Wrestling Report
May 3, 2012
Taped in Orlando, Fla.
Report by Scott Turner, PWTorch contributor

[Q1] The show opened with a video package once again highlighting the Bischoff saga, particularly Eric’s going-away party being crashed by Garett Bischoff. Epic music played as the video recapped Eric covered in, presumably, fake, fecal matter.

Ric Flair was in the ring and aired his grievances with Hulk Hogan and Garett Bischoff. He channeled classic Ric Flair, and boasted about how expensive all parts of his attire were before calling Hogan out to the ring.

Hogan came out and Flair called him good, and referred to himself as evil. He said he was going to take control of the company. Hogan said he wasn’t out for a fight, and that he took his general manager position seriously. He reminded Flair that he worked for him, and that as his boss he wanted him to be a judge for Gut Check. After a bit of hesitation, Flair said he loved hanging around with the kids and that he would do it.

Turner Reax: I wish they wouldn’t open the show with Hogan and Flair. I have to imagine that a lot of viewers had to be turned off by two over-exposed, wrongly-utilized, part-time (if you can even call it that) Legends getting television time to kick off the show.

An ad aired for Gut Check and the future of Alex Silva in TNA. They also hyped Robert Roode and RVD picking opponents for one another later in the night along with a Knockouts tag team match pitting Sky and Tessmacher against Kim and Rayne.

[Commercial Break]

Backstage, Rayne and Tessmacher talked about Kim, and both made claims of eventually beating her for the Knockouts Title

[Q2]

1 -- TNA Knockouts champions GAIL KIM & MADISON RAYNE vs. BROOKE TESSMACHER & VELVET SKY

Rayne and Kim blindsided both Sky and Tessmacher before it boiled down to Sky and Kim in the ring. Kim and Rayne exchanged tags and beat on Sky with some double-team maneuvers. Rayne eventually hit a heel kick on Sky for a close two count. Kim went for a top rope huracanrana, but Sky held onto the ropes and hit a bulldog on Kim which allowed her to get the hot tag. Tessmacher had a flurry of offense, but was eventually taken down with a clothesline from Kim. Kim was the victim of her own finisher as Tessmacher hit her with Eat Da Feet for the win.

WINNERS: Tessmacher & Sky via pinfall at 4:49.

Turner Reax: They have to make Tessmacher feel like a credible threat to win the title, but I feel bad for Kim for having to lose to Tessmacher three times in a row. Hopefully she picks up the win when they meet for the Knockouts Title. For the little amount of offense Tessmacher had, she looked sloppy in the ring.

RVD was shown warming up backstage as the show cut to commercials.

[Commercial Break]

In the ring RVD, boasted about himself, and said that even though he didn’t have to tell everyone how great of a wrestler he was, he was going to anyways because he is Rob Van Dam. He ran through all of his nicknames before saying he was going to beat Roode for the title. Roode came out and questioned RVD’s overconfidence. He then ran through his nicknames before reminding RVD that he is the World Heavyweight champion.

[Q3] Roode said he would beat him at Sacrifice and then asked RVD who he had picked for his opponent for tonight. RVD revealed that he would be facing Mr. Anderson, and Roode retorted by revealing that RVD’s opponent would be Jeff Hardy. He wished him luck while mocking his trademark thumb pointing routine.

Turner Reax: This wasn’t even remarkable mic work from Roode or anything, but he was so much better than RVD. Van Dam came off as unlikable, lazy, and unprepared. That being said, aside from his promo at the first One Night Stand PPV in 2005, I have never really enjoyed RVD’s mic work.

An ad aired to hype a six-man tag match between Joe, Magnus, and Styles against Daniels, Kazarian, and Angle.

[Commercial Break]

2 -- TNA Television champion DEVON vs. ROBBIE T. (w/ ROBBIE E.) -- Television Title match

Robbie T. was quick to attack Devon before the bell and he laid him out with a clothesline and a shoulder tackle. He hit a front powerslam on Devon for a two count. Devon came back with a pair of flying shoulder tackles, and hit a diving headbutt off the top rope for a two count. Robbie E. distracted Devon in an attempt to allow Robbie T. to get some offense, but when that failed, he resorted to his guest list and broke it over Devon’s head as the referee called for the disqualification.

WINNER: Devon via disqualification at 2:46 to retain the TNA Television Title.

Turner Reax: Last week, I said I didn’t want to see Devon feud with Bully Ray, but I think I’d rather see that than his feud with the Robbies continue. In reality, I just rather see a wrestler who can really go like, oh, I don’t know, A.J. Styles, Kazarian, Daniels, Kid Kash, or Zema Ion just to name a few.

Backstage, Flair and Al Snow talked about Gut Check. Snow revealed the third judge would be Bruce Prichard, who came out and chatted with the other judges.

[Commercial Break]

[Q4] Flair, Snow, and Pritchard continued their conversation backstage concerning Silva. Flair was particularly hard on him and said he didn’t have the body type for the business, and that he never would. Pritchard and Snow made a case for Silva, and compared Flair’s naysaying to when Flair was young and people had the same criticisms of him. The verdict was still not in by the time the segment ended.

Turner Reax: For what it was, I liked the segment. I can see some people thinking this might have been too “insider” for the casual fan, and I concur, but I think for future segments like these, if they stick with the Gut Check concept, it could work if they kept it within the confines of the of pro wrestling being presented as a legit sport. They should be talking about potential wins and losses rather than drawing power, though.

Ads aired for Roode vs. Anderson and RVD vs. Hardy, which was next.

[Commercial Break]

Backstage, Hogan gave Anderson a pep talk concerning his match with Roode. Hogan announced that the match would now be contested under no disqualification rules.

[Q5]

3 -- JEFF HARDY vs. ROB VAN DAM

Hardy tried to keep RVD grounded with a headlock, but he broke out of with and countered with a roll up on Hardy using his legs for a two count. Hardy sent RVD to the outside with a kick and followed up a flying clothesline to outside from the ring apron. Back in the ring, Hardy caught RVD with a pin attempt for a two count after Van Dam did the splits to go under Hardy after an Irish whip. After an exchange of offense, Hardy hit the Whisper in the Wind for another two count. RVD came back with a chinbreaker, a kick, and the Rolling Thunder.

As the wrestlers sold the effects of the move, Roode made his was out the ring. Once they got back up Hardy went for another Irish whip, which RVD reversed. When Hardy hit the ropes, the referee had to take a dive to avoid being hit. Roode took advantage of the situation and hit Hardy with the belt. RVD followed up with a kick to Hardy's face for the win.

WINNER: Rob Van Dam via pinfall at 4:36.

Turner Reax: Disappointing match from these two. They were only given so much time so I can’t come down too hard on them, but I expected more from an RVD and Hardy match.

Backstage, Joseph Park once again confronted Bully Ray about the whereabouts of Abyss. Park said he knew that Ray had something to do with disappearance of his brother. He taunted Park about not being able to find his brother, and said if he Park didn’t leave him alone that no one would be able to find him, either.

Ads hyped the six-man tag match and Anderson vs. Roode for later in the night before the show cut to commercials.

[Commercial Break]

Backstage, Jeremy Borash talked trash about Eric Bischoff. Ray cut him off and asked him to keep talking trash. He dragged him to ringside by his tie and told him to get in the ring. Ray continued to chastise Borash, and threatened to drop him. Ray made light of anti-bullying campaigns and said they should be the “stop being a little b**** and stand up for yourself” campaigns.

Tensions were about to boil over until Aries came out, mocking Ray. He said Ray was no different than other bullies who have called him out on his size. Aries made fun of Ray, and called him “blubber Ray.”

[Q6] Ray took exception to the name-calling and spit in Aries’s face, which led to Aries getting the better of Ray with a beating in the corner. Officials came out to hold Aries back, which allowed Ray to kick him in the gut. Ray gloated on his way out as Aries shot eye daggers at him from the ring.

Turner Reax: Great segment, and all indications point to Aries being incredibly over. These two work so well together, and for tonight’s sake the addition of Borash - a beloved TNA Original of sorts - in the segment getting bullied by Ray helped a lot.

Backstage, Daniels and Kazarian talked about wrestling Joe and Magnus for the Tag Titles at Sacrifice. They said once they had the belts, they would reveal what blackmail they had on Styles. Angle, who sitting behind them, told them to shut up and that he didn’t care about their personal matters with A.J. He said the only thing that mattered to him was making Styles tap out at Sacrifice.

[Commercial Break]

Backstage, Roode expressed his disdain for Hogan and his decision to make his match with Anderson a no disqualification match. He said last time there was an authority figure that he took care of it.

4 -- TNA Tag Team champions MAGNUS & SAMOA JOE & A.J. STYLES vs. KURT ANGLE & KAZARIAN & DANIELS

Styles and Angle started the match with Styles getting a dropkick in. As Kurt was about to gain the offensive edge, Daniels tried to take advantage of a downed Styles, but Angle would have none of it and pushed Daniels down to the mat. Styles tagged in Joe, who in turn exchanged a tag with Magnus to hit some double-team offense on Angle. Magnus tagged in Styles, who proceeded to clear house until the numbers game caught up to him. Joe stepped in and sent Daniels to out for Magnus to beat on for a bit until he was ready to catch with a suicide elbow through the ropes to the outside.

[Q7] Styles tried to go to the outside, but was stopped by Angle, who caught him in an anklelock. It looked like Angle had the win until Kazarian, much to the bewilderment of Angle, tagged himself in. Magnus and Joe took care of Angle and Daniels, eventually allowing Styles the opportunity to hit Kazarian with the Styles Clash for the win.

WINNERS: Magnus, Samoa Joe, and A.J. Styles via pinfall at 4:25.

Turner Reax: That was enjoyable for what it was. Another match with a ton star power relegated to perform in under five minutes. Storyline-wise, it wouldn’t make sense to have it main-event the show, but from an in-ring perspective, I would have loved to have seen these two teams go for at least 15 minutes.

Post-match: After taking a verbal lashing from Angle, Daniels said that Styles had seven days to reveal his secret, and that if he failed to comply that he would reveal it for him. The announcers played up the mystery of Styles’s secret, citing his squeaky-clean personality.

[Commercial Break]

In the ring, the three judges of the Gut Check challenge introduced Alex Silva, decked out in his ring gear. Silva faced the criticisms and compliments of all three judges, with Flair being the most vocal stating that he needs to come back when grows up. In accordance with his prior criticisms, Flair voted no on Silva, Snow voted yes, and before Pritchard gave his verdict, Snow gave Silva the chance to speak for himself.

Silva began to speak before Flair cut him off and told him to speak to the judges, not the marks. The Gut Check prospect kicked things into overdrive and said that he came from Canada with his now deceased father with no money in hopes of accomplishing his dream of being a professional wrestler. He said the contract would prove to his dad that it was all worth it. After his promo, Flair said he had changed his vote and was now in favor of Silva. Pritchard echoed the same sentiments, but not before saying that if it wasn’t for his promo he would have voted no on Silva. Silva got emotional as it was announced he had earned a TNA contract.

[Q8] 5 -- TNA World Heavyweight champion BOBBY ROODE vs. MR. ANDERSON -- No DQ match

Before Roode could get to the ring, Anderson hopped out to ringside to beat on Roode. Roode came back with a Russian leg sweep into ring apron, but a failed piledriver attempt led to Anderson slingshotting Roode into the ringpost, followed by the Pittsburgh Plunge as the show cut to commercial break.

[Commercial Break]

As the show came back from the break, Anderson approached a downed Roode, who threw the referee into Anderson to low blow him, even though it was already a No DQ match. Roode beat on Anderson for a little bit on the outside of the ring before bringing him back in the ring for a suplex and a knee drop for a two count.

Roode brought in a steel chair and wedged it in-between the ropes in the corner. He tried to throw Anderson into it, but he countered and threw Roode head-first into the chair. Anderson was able to capitalize with a series of strikes, a swinging neckbreaker, and a spinning wheel kick for a two count. Anderson attempted another Pittsburgh Plunge, but Roode countered with a Double R spinebuster. Hardy came out to attack Roode, but Anderson took out his frustration on Hardy with the Mic Check. Roode capitalized on the distraction and hit Anderson with a chair and a Fishermen Suplex for the win.

WINNER: Robert Roode via pinfall at 11:04.

Post-match: Roode tried to continue the attack on Anderson, but RVD made the save. As RVD checked on his fallen comrades, Roode snuck back in and hit RVD with a DDT on the chair to close out the show.

Turner Reax: A worthy television main event, and one of Anderson’s better matches in recent memory. Roode played up his heel tendencies and delivered in the ring as well. Honestly, I would have rather see these two go at Sacrifice, more so than RVD and Roode. Not that I don’t think RVD and Roode can’t produce a good match, but I’ve just soured on RVD pretty much since his TNA run began.

Nothing about tonight’s hype for their PPV match made me want to see it more. RVD blew it on the mic, his match was nothing special, and he looked like a total dope for getting rocked by Roode with a chair literally seconds after he had chased him out of the ring. Tonight’s edition of Impact was average in peculiar fashion. There was a grip of main event caliber matches that were held back by time constraints. The effort was there, the time wasn’t. Thanks again for reading, and see you all next week.

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