TNA Impact Wrestling Report
March 29, 2012
Taped in Orlando, Fla.
Report by Scott Turner, PWTorch Contributor

[Q1] A video recapping the drama between Sting, Bobby Roode, Dixie Carter, and Hulk Hogan opened up the show. Carter was shown backstage talking about how last week Hogan closed out the show without giving an answer. She said she gave Hogan a week to come up with his answer.

Roode made his entrance to the Impact Zone with a whole security team surrounding him. In the ring, Roode told everyone that has voiced their desire to see him fired to kiss his world championship a--. He said he physically and mentally beat Sting down, and said him stepping down from the general manager position solidified him winning the war. Roode told Carter to keep her nose out of his business because nothing was going to stop him, and reminded everyone that he had no obligation to be on-camera until his title match with James Storm at Lockdown. He said the reason he had a whole security team with him was for Storm’s protection, and that at Lockdown he was going to prove he was the “it factor.” Roode got face-first into the camera and said when you’re as good as he is that he did not need any luck.

This prompted Storm to come out as the crowd chanted, “Cowboy.” Storm questioned Roode’s manhood and asked him what kind of man lays his hands on a woman the way Roode did. He called Roode’s security team mall cops and said the he wasn’t there to steal a t-shirt, but to kick the crap out of Roode. As Storm motioned for Roode he was attacked from behind by Bully Ray. Without much effort, Storm made a comeback, which led to Ray, Roode, and the security team exiting the ring. Storm challenged Ray and Roode to a match, which they accepted.

Turner Reax: That was a strong opening segment that boiled down to the two homegrown stars that TNA can count on. I thought Roode and Ray were at odds? I suppose Storm and Ray’s recent feud justifies Ray siding with Roode yet again.

Backstage, Gail Kim was shown trying to reconcile with Madison Rayne. She apologized for their tumultuous relationship as of late, and gave Rayne a crown. Kim told Rayne that she was going to beat Velvet Sky in their match tonight.

An ad aired for Rayne and Sky.

[Commercial Break]

[Q2]

1 -- VELVET SKY vs. MADISON RAYNE

The bell rang as Rayne attacked Sky on her way into the ring, and hit a flying heel kick, followed by choking Sky out on the ropes. The crowd chanted for Sky as she made a comeback for a two count following a dropkick to Rayne. Sky hit a “spear-like move” followed by a bulldog and In Yo Face for the win.

WINNER: Velvet Sky via pinfall at 3:00

Turner Reax: Quick and painless, but it's not like that is a testament to the work from these Knockouts. Sky and Rayne are a mixed bag, in that their work ranges from pleasantly passable to almost unwatchable, but they have come a long way from playing second and third fiddle to Angelina Love.

Outside the ring, Christy Hemme asked Sky what was next for her. Sky focused on Kim and told her that she was coming for her and her Knockouts Title.

An ad aired for footage concerning Hogan and Carter coming up next.

[Commercial Break]

Backstage, Ray told Roode that even though they haven’t been on the best of terms that they had to keep their eye on the ball and beat Storm.

Footage aired of Carter and Hogan talking on a bench about the past two years in TNA. Hogan admitted that he had made some bad choices over the course of his run in the company. Carter told him that she needed the real Hulk Hogan. Hogan said he realized the path he was following with Eric Bischoff was the wrong path, and that he had made peace with the TNA crew.

[Q3] He said he believed his day had already came, and that Sting was her best shot at fixing the situation with Roode. Carter begged Hogan to come back and take care of Roode. Hogan told her that he felt that the TNA ship had sailed on too far without him, but that he would be at tonight’s show and that their would be a period at the end of this situation.

Turner Reax: Peculiar segment that didn’t do much for this viewer. Part of the problem, at least for me, lies in the fact that everything Hogan says to me comes off as phony. Take any insider knowledge a person may have of Hogan out of the equation and you still have a guy who about a month ago was in London cutting a promo about how he and TNA were breaking into the next level. What?

A video package recapped the events that led up to split and feud between Matt Morgan and Crimson. An ad for their match match tonight led into commercial break.

[Commercial Break]

Backstage, Kurt Angle said he didn’t want to give Jeff Hardy a re-match at Lockdown because he is a crybaby. He said if Hardy beat Mr. Anderson tonight he would give him the match.

As Hemme was about to announce Morgan vs. Crimson, she was cut off by Austin Aries. He apologized about coming out when it wasn’t his slotted television time, but that it seemed like people come out whenever they wanted to anyways. He said he a bone to pick with Bully Ray, and that he took exception to Ray taking out his embarrassment that Storm caused him by attacking him during a title match. Aries said he now had a problem with Ray, and that he had a set of balls as big as Ray’s calves. He said he had no problem speaking the truth, just like Storm, and that he respected him. Aries closed out his promo by asking Storm to let him join him in his match tonight against Ray and Roode.

Turner Reax: I’m totally okay with Aries treading the face line. I have enough trust in Aries’s abilities as a performer and wrestler to win over the audience in that manner, and this is a good segue to let Aries be a part of the main event picture.

Morgan made his way out as the show went to break.

[Q4] As the show came back from break, Morgan and Crimson were already beating on each outside of the ring.

2 -- MATT MORGAN vs. CRIMSON

In the ring, Crimson got the offensive advantage over Morgan, until Morgan was able to knock Crimson to the outside. Crimson yanked Morgan out of the ring and slammed his head on the apron and threw him back in the ring for a two count. Morgan was able to dodge a spear that sent Crimson, shoulder first, into the ringpost. He was able to take advantage of Crimson’s mistake, and continued to brawl with him outside of the ring. As Morgan reversed Crimson’s piledriver attempt on the ramp, the ref rang the bell for a double-countout.

WINNER: The match ended in a double-countout at 3:51.

Morgan and Crimson continued to battle until they were out of the Impact Zone

Ads aired for Hogan and Carter and the match between Anderson and Hardy.

[Commercial Break]

Joseph Parks was shown in the production truck asking the crew if they could point him in the right direction to help him find Abyss. They didn’t know, but Parks was humble towards them, and left them his card in case they heard anything about his brother’s whereabouts.

An ad aired for Aries and Storm vs. Roode and Ray, the video for James Storm’s entrance music, and Hogan and Carter.

Anderson came out and asked if there were any a--holes in the audience, and did his usual entrance routine.

[Q5]

3-- MR. ANDERSON vs. JEFF HARDY

Hardy and Anderson started the match exchanging basic holds. As the wrestlers went at it in the ring Mike Tenay announced that the Motor City Machine Guns would be returning next week. Back to the match, Anderson nailed Hardy with a big kick to the side of the gut of a fallen Hardy. Hardy made a comeback, but missed a dropkick in the corner, which led to a two count from Anderson. Hardy was able to come back on the offensive with a pair of dropkicks for a two count. Anderson was able to regain the offensive edge and hit an elbow drop, and tried to followed up with the Mic Check, but Hardy countered, which led to both wrestlers butting heads so bad that it sent Hardy to the outside. Outside the ring, Angle snuck up on Hardy and hit him with a low blow before throwing him back in the ring. In the ring, Anderson hit a dazed Hardy with a Mic Check for the win.

WINNER: Mr. Anderson via pinfall at 4:17.

Turner Reax: A pretty standard match the furthered the issue between Angle and Hardy. After airing vignettes over the past few weeks for the return of the Motor City Machineguns. I found it strange that they would just announce their return date so anticlimactically in the middle of an unrelated match.

A video aired for James Storm’s theme song “Longnecks and Rednecks.”

Carter was shown backstage getting out a limo before the camera cut to Eric Bischoff walking towards the Impact Zone. The announcers said Bischoff had a challenge for his son, Garett, tonight.

[Commercial Break]

Eric Young and ODB were shown trying to plan their wedding. Akin to Ric Flair, Young said he was a wedding god, super funny. ODB played up her jealousy once Young said he got the wedding planner from another Knockout, and seemed even more jealous once the wedding planner came out. ODB said that three days before Lockdown that Young and her would be getting married in a steel cage.

[Q6] Eric Bischoff came out to the ring and said he was an amazing man that amazed even himself. He said he had the unique ability to manifest change with nothing more than a contract that says he gets camera time whenever he wants it. He said that one of the secrets to his success was that he made a checklist every morning he woke up. Bischoff said the only thing he couldn’t check off of his list was getting rid of his “snot nosed ingrate of a son.”

Garett came out as his father told him he was going to give him the chance to move on from TNA, or propose that he face Gunner in a cage match at Lockdown. Garret took to the mic and told his father that he wasn’t going anywhere and that if he thought he wasn’t going face Gunner at Lockdown that he Bischoff was dumber than everyone thought he was.

Another ad aired for Carter and Hogan, and the main event between Storm and Aries vs. Ray and Roode.

[Commercial Break]

Footage was shown of Storm training in an empty barn in the rain. The video included testimonials from Storm talking about his disdain for Roode for recent behavior and for breaking up Beer Money.

[Q7] Hogan was shown walking backstage as the announcers hyped his appearance later in the night.

4 -- BULLY RAY & TNA World Heavyweight champion BOBBY ROODE vs. JAMES STORM & TNA X Division champion AUSTIN ARIES

It seemed as if Aries and Ray were going to start the match as the crowd chanted for Aries. Ray teased Aries about getting his hands on him, but then tagged Roode in. Roode took advantage of Aries trying to tag Storm in to face to Roode. Aries showed off some his flashy offense until Roode was able to ground for a short while before Aries nailed him with an elbow to the face.

[Commercial Break]

Back from the break, Aries was in the ring getting the better of Ray. Aries continued to get the best of Ray in the corner until he caught Ray’s boot the face.

[Q8] Ray tagged in Roode, who picked up his scraps while taunting Storm. Roode got a little offense in before tagging Ray back into the match. Ray put Aries into the corner where Roode started to get into his face yelling that he was the real champion which prompted Aires to wake up and attacked both Roode and Ray. Aries was able to roll through Ray’s offense to tag in Storm, who cleaned house.

As Storm was about to substantially get his hands on Roode, Ray got involved as Roode went to the outside to fill his mouth up with some of Storm’s beer. Roode tried to spit Storm’s beer in his face, but Storm as quick enough to dodge the spray as it hit Ray in the face. Storm hit the superkick on Ray for the pin.

WINNERS: James Storm and Austin Aries via pinfall at 12:24.

Turner Reax: Good match that shouldn’t have been overshadowed by a segment with Hogan and a trite authority figure scenario. This match accomplished two significant things: one, it established Austin Aries as a serious contender outside of the World Title picture, as he picked up the slack for an injured Storm, and two, it made Storm look like badass for picking up the win for his team.

Hogan was shown making his way to the inside of the Impact Zone.

[Commercial Break]

As the show came back from break, Carter was already in the ring and asked Hogan to come out. Hogan came out, and Carter told Hogan that she believed him and that she wanted him to take the general manager position. He said at Bound for Glory, when he made peace with everyone, he had closed the book on this part of his life. Sting came to the ring with a group of TNA’s main babyfaces.

Sting said Hogan couldn’t deny all of the people in the Impact Zone and asked him for his decision. Hogan asked for a clean slate, and said he needed to know one thing, that if Sting would watch his back. Sting said he would, but he needed to know if Hogan was going to take the keys to car that is TNA. Hogan said as long Sting had his back that TNA had a new general manager. Everyone in the ring celebrated as the show came to a close.

Turner Reax: That wasn’t as overbearing and self-indulgent as I was expecting to be. That being said, why couldn’t this have gone on before the match before it? Impact ending with promo segments should be an exception to the rule, not standard practice on pretty much a weekly basis. Furthermore, did anyone expect Hogan to not take the position as general manager?

For the lack of wrestling before the night’s last match, I found tonight’s edition of Impact to be more enjoyable than last week’s, and dare I say...good? I don’t know what it is with wrestling writers’s fixation with authority figure-centered storylines, but it wasn’t even half-a-year-ago that Hogan was playing an authority role, albeit a heel one. Between Storm, Roode, Ray, Aries, Morgan, Joe, Styles, Daniels, Kazarian, Magnus, and not to mention the returning Motor City Machineguns, there is a more than watchable talent roster available to put on an awesome television product. If Hogan takes a backseat and is only occasionally featured on television, I’ll willingly eat my words, but this is silly. Now, it’s time to start going back to day dreaming about WrestleMania, so thanks again for reading, and see you next week.

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