By Wade Keller, PWTorch editor

KELLER'S TNA IMPACT REPORT
JULY 8, 2010
TAPED IN ORLANDO, FLA.
AIRED ON SPIKE TV

[Q1]

-The show opened with a video package asking whether Jeff Hardy can trust Mr. Anderson. "Can he win back the trust of Jeff Hardy, or is the asshole's reputation just too much to overcome?" asked a new voiceover guy. The usual TNA voiceover guy who sounds like James Earl Jones introduced the Lebron James special on ESPN.

-Mike Tenay asked aloud whether Anderson's chairshot at Hardy last week an accident? Taz asked Tenay, whose built a career on trying to not take sides in controversial circumstances, what he thought. Tenay said when he heard Taz say it was accidental, "My immediate thought was, 'Are you sure, Taz?'" He managed to not take a position there, either.

Anderson walked to the ring with the dented chair. He called Hardy to the ring. Hardy walked out. Anderson said it was accident. He said if he did it on purpose, he would have told the whole world about it. "Do you know why? Because I'm an asshole." He said the world would be a better place with more assholes in it. He said the Impact Zone is a great place and it's filled with assholes. He said he's going to bring the chair to the ring with him tonight because they have a match tonight and if he uses the chair, he'll have a conclusive answer. He said if he uses it against him, he might have had it coming, but he will in fact know that he has a problem with him. He promptly left the ring as Hardy pondered what he said. TNA's creative team is learning how to get Hardy involved in promos without worrying about him forgetting his lines.

-A backstage handheld camera segment aired with A.J. Styles saying he is disappointed in himself. He vowed to tear Kazarian apart to prove himself and he hopes Flair is happy with the ramifications. [c]

-Hardy backstage said anytime someone hits him with a chair, he questions the motivation of the person who swung it. He said he's not sure where "Ken" is right now. He said they'll find out tonight.

1 -- KAZARIAN vs. A.J. STYLES

Styles went right at Kaz even before his pyro stopped. Nice opening action with some rapid armdrags. Taz said, "I don't know who was arm-dragging who, they were so fast." At 2:00 Flair walked to the ring as Kaz had Styles in a side headlock.

[Q2]

Taz said Styles has more big-match experience so he favors him in this match. Styles hit his Pele kick at 5:00. When he charged Kaz, Kaz backdropped him over the top rope and then slingshot himself over the top rope and drove Styles's head into the ring apron on the way down. They fought to a double countout. When the bell rang, they paused in shock, then brawled again, rolling around on the mat. Flair entered the ring and told them to stop.

WINNER: Double countout in 11:00.

STAR RATING: **1/4

-Flair said the fans should shut up. He said they already admitted they've assholes. He told Styles and Kaz that the decision is over and they need to accept it, and then get ready to work together on Sunday. Taz said Flair isn't even telling them whom they're facing on Sunday. Tenay said he's intrigued.

-They showed Angelina Love topless from behind backstage trying to decide which top to wear. [c]

2 -- ANGELINA LOVE vs. DAFFNEY

(I am very happy. Mike Tenay said "she couldn't care less" instead of "she could care less.") Tenay talked about Sting's indefinite suspension. He wondered if they'd ever seen Sting in TNA again. Taz sounded like a beauty pageant contestant with this wordy-but-say-nothing time-filling response: "Ah ha, that's a good question, Mike. I'm not really sure. That' s a huge turn of events that whole situation with Sting and our president of TNA, Dixie Carter suspending him for 30 days. You heard Sting say make it indefinite." Meanwhile, Love finished off Daffney, cutting Taz off before he could find another wordy way to recap what happened last week.

WINNER: Love in 2:00.

[Q3]

-Afterward Love said Madison Rayne probably is watching at home because she "doesn't have the balls to be here." She said at Victory Road she will become the first-ever four-time TNA Knockouts Champion. Rayne walked out and said if she's putting the TNA Knockouts Title on the line on Sunday, what is she risking. Uh, Love doesn't have to put anything up. That's how title contracts work. Champion defends, and the challenger puts up their no. 1 contender status. If they lose, they don't get the belt. Rayne suggested Love put her career on the line. Love said, "So you want me to put my career on the line? You got it!" God TNA likes to make babyfaces look like complete buffoons. Love then revealed a "special stipulation" that is supposed to make up for her stupidity in putting her career on the line. She said if other Beautiful People interfere, Rayne will be DQ'd on the spot and she will be handed the TNA Knockouts Title. I don't hate much in wrestling, but I absolutely hate when bookers put babyfaces in a position to put their careers on the line for NO REASON. As if Vince Russo didn't do enough to destroy the value of titles in his illustrious 15 years behind the scenes, now he wants to destroy the novelty of "career matches" and undercut the credibility and admirability of babyfaces. Imagine next year if the Heat make it to the finals against the Lakers. Then Kobe says to Lebron, "I'm putting my status as NBA Champion on the line. What are you putting on the line? How about your career?" And Lebron agreed that the Heat didn't beat the Lakers, he'd quit the sport. He'd be seen as the dumbest stupidest biggest friggin' moron in the history of sports. Why doesn't anyone in TNA speak up against this?

-Tenay plugged RVD vs. Samoa Joe was coming up later.

-The roving reporter asked Devon backstage what he's going to say to Brother Ray later. Devon said, "We'll see, won't we?" [c]

-A video package aired on the dissension between Devon and Brother Ray. Devon said Jesse Neal did everything they asked of him and proved himself to them. He talked about his friend in the military getting killed. I know using real-life experiences to enhance a fictional wrestling character is standard operations, but should they really be going back to a dead soldier over and over to get a storyline over? Ray told Devon to "shut up for a second." He said his problem used to be just with Neal for being a "disrespectful little punk," but now his problem is with him for being disloyal. Devon said his loyalty has nothing to do with this. Ray asked him who he's loyal to. Devon said he doesn't pick sides; he's loyal to both of them. Ray revealed that at Victory Road, "It's me versus Jesse... [pause] versus you," revealing it's a three-way. Ray said after 15 years together and 23 World Tag Team Titles, they'll either continue on into glory or it comes to an end that night.

[Q4] [c]

3 -- SAMOA JOE vs. ROB VAN DAM

Taz said Eric Bischoff smells ratings by booking this match. Quit talking about ratings! Matches should be booked by a promoter, at least from an on-air storyline perspective, because it will help determine who should rise in the rankings for a title shot or to settle a grudge. It cheapens the ideas of a match if they're just whoring matches out for ratings and that's why they exist - again from an on-air storyline perspective. We all know reality, but that shouldn't be part of wrestling commentary any more than a character on a TV show saying he is motivated to cheat on his wife or take off her clothes "for ratings." When wrestling promoters get that concept, those wrestling shows will be more entertaining. When they don't get that concept, it's a dead giveaway they don't really get at the core how to present pro wrestling on TV.

RVD stiffed Joe with a wheelkick to the side of his face early. Joe fired back with an early Musclebuster set-up. RVD fought it, so Joe shoved him into the rampway at ringside. Some fans chanted, "Joe's gonna kill you." Joe dove through the ropes onto RVD at 2:00. They would have cut to a break here before their welcome policy against interrupting matches on TV. They did cut to Tommy Dreamer, Raven, Rhino, and Stevie Richards walking to ringside. Joe scored a two count once RVD was back in the ring. Tenay pressed Taz for more details about the ECW crew showing up. Taz said he was tight with them years ago, but he also had some issues with them, but it was a long time ago. He said if he was getting married today, Tommy probably wouldn't be his best man. "That was then, this is now," he said. Tenay said he thinks it's strange that someone with that history with them wouldn't know more. Joe scored some near falls against RVD. RVD came back at 5:00 with a sidekick off the second rope for a near fall.

[Q5]

Joe powerbombed RVD and leveraged his shoulders into a pin position. RVD lifted his shoulder. Joe shifted into a Boston crab. RVD reached the bottom rope. RVD teased a comeback, but Joe applied a rear naked choke. How long before Lesnar's finisher against Scott Carwin gets introduced as a wrestler's finisher? RVD stood, but Joe held on. RVD kicked off the top rope and flipped Joe onto his back and bridged Joe's shoulders down for a pin while Joe still had the rear naked choke on, getting a three count. Taz called it a "purist's dream match." Tenay said something tells him those two will meet again sometime down the road. Taz said he he was honored to call that and would be honored to call it again.

WINNER: RVD in 9:00.

STAR RATING: *** -- That's the type of action that will win over some fans who don't like to trudge through TNA's booking.

-Afterward Joe got upset with the ref and slapped him, then gave him a Muscle Buster.

-A segment aired with Angle saying pressure makes him a better wrestler and keeps him on his toes. He said he's been in the ring with Anderson before and if he were Hardy, he'd watch his back and be careful. [c]

4 -- DOUGLAS WILLIAMS vs. JEREMY BUCK -- Ladder Match

Yep, an unannounced ladder match... with Jeremy Buck. Bulletin: There are ways to promote a ladder match without having a ladder match. Taz he learned from Williams that he's afraid of heights, which could complicate his performance in the ladder match. A big red "X" hung above the ring. Buck brought the ladder into the ring at 1:00. Buck played to the crowd briefly, which gave Williams the extra seconds he needed to stop him from winning the match of his life. Nice job, Buck. Buck springboarded into the ring and drove Williams's head into the ladder on the mat. Williams dropped Buck off the top of the ladder to the mat back-first and then set up the ladder. Williams looked fearful of climbing that high. Buck climbed the top rope and dove onto the ladder and then powerbombed WIlliams off of the ladder. Nice move. Buck then climbed the ladder. Williams dove at him. He kicked Williams. Buck grabbed the X for the win. Taz and Tenay agreed it's a huge upset. Taz said his fear of heights cost him. Williams threw a fit, beating up the ladder and throwing it out of the ring to the floor

WINNER: Buck in 4:00.

[Q6] [c]

-A video aired showing TNA performing in front of 6,000 on July 2 at a baseball stadium. It had inspirational messages about putting the fans first. Then they thanked New York.

-A video aired with Alex Shelley using Warner Bros. cartoon music. He said he has a problem with Chris Sabin. He said Sabin used to be just like him - fun, athletic, and handsome. But that was before he discovered the evils of Beer Money. They went from images of Sabin smiling and dancing to Sabin being drunk, hung over, and stumbling off the top rope. Shelley told parents to warn their kids about the dangers of Beer Money. The message was paid for by "The Motor City Machineguns and the Beer Money are a Couple of Tools" foundation.

5 -- BEER MONEY & MATT MORGAN vs. MOTOR CITY MACHINEGUNS & HERNANDEZ

Sabin took a beating for a couple minutes, then hot-tagged in Hernandez. Morgan avoided Hernandez, leaping off the ring apron as he moved toward him. Hernandez shoulder-blocked Roode out of mid-air and knocked him an entirely new direction. Hernandez catapulted Roode into Shelley who dropped Roode face-first into the middle turnbuckle. Hernandez slingshot at both Beer Money members with a double clothesline. Hernandez then chased Morgan to the back as Shelley and Sabin double-teamed Roode. Sabin dove at Storm at ringside as Shelley dove off the top rope onto Roode. Roode rolled through, though, and scored a sudden pin.

WINNERS: Beer Money & Morgan in 6:00.

STAR RATING: *1/2 -- Nice short tag match.

[Q7]

-The Pope said backstage to the roving reporter that he can't trust Anderson as far as he can throw him. He said his focus is now on Victory Road because he has to face Angle. He said Angle has made it clear if he loses, it's his last match. Well, that takes the suspense out of whether Pope will score an upset. [c]

-Kevin Nash told the roving reporter backstage that he's sitting there waiting for Eric Bischoff to let him know if he still has a job. He said he'll give him a kiss on the rump to be sure he still has a job. He said that's a guy who was going with the Dungeon of Doom before he and Scott Hall arrived in WCW. Hulk Hogan walked in and asked if he had seen Bischoff yet. Hogan said his attempts to get Hall and Sean Waltman contracts again won't work. Hogan said he did a favor and gave them a chance and it didn't work out. Hogan said that "end-around" doesn't work for him and those guys "used their stuff up" a long time. He said they're still friends, but it's not cool to him. He said maybe Eric feels differently, but he can't help him. Nash sighed and leaned back in his chair as Hogan left.

-They went to the ring where Jay Lethal stood. He talked about how it felt to see his little brother beat up by his childhood idol. He said it ripped his heart out, so at Victory Road he's going to rip out Flair's heart. He said even though the greatest part of his week is ahead, his mother has been ill lately. He said he wanted her to hear from him that he loves her very much. He said he also wants her to know that he plans to make her the proudest mother in the world when he beats Flair at Victory Road. Flair interrupted and walked out and got in Lethal's face. He said he "could give a rat's ass about your mother." He said as a matter of fact, truth be known, his "old lady" is living vicariously through him "because she wants me." Lethal fumed.

"You've got three days to live," said Flair. He told Lethal to forget about being the greatest wrestler of all-time and stylin' and profilin', he's the best there is. He said his robe from WrestleMania is in the Smithsonian Institute, which he said "is for dead people or people who are really famous." He said he grew up in a nice family, but his mom and dad sent him on his way at age 15, and he's been partying in limos ever since. He said he's been to psychologists and after an hour they're lying on the couch "because I'm crazy." He said once a woman feels his caressing she is scarred for life. He said he has an ex-wife wandering around her bedroom wondering where he is because he's "all night long." He said he's got a million of them.

He told Lethal he doesn't belong in his world, much less his ring. Lethal got in his face. Flair told him to back up. He told him he has three days to think about it. He said he's in his head now. He said, "I'm not a human, I'm a god." He said he can have any woman he wants. He said in three days he's gotta wrestle him. He said he is a living, breathing machine. He said there are hospitals who want him to donate his body parts because they want to see what makes him go. Lethal finally spoke up and said, "Well, I might help them." Flair said he's been cut, crashed in airplanes, and been hit by lightning. 
"What are you going to do?" Flair said. He told Lethal he's going to look his God in the eye and get his ass handed to him. They were nose-to-nose at this point. Lethal held his position. Flair said, "Three days," then strutted. That ends Flair's candidacy for Worst Promos of the Year, which he was sadly headed toward with some crap promos the first half of the year. This was vintage Flair showing that with some material to work with and focus, he can sell a match. He still probably yelled too much and overdid it by 10 percent, but it wasn't a parody of what he used to be, so that's nice.

[Q8] [c]

-Tenay and Taz hyped the Victory Road line-up.

6 -- MR. ANDERSON vs. JEFF HARDY

When he stopped on the stage on his way to the ring, Mr. Anderson said: "I call to session this meeting of Assholes Anonymous and I am your sponsor, Mr. Anderson!" Then Hardy made his ring intro. The match began with seven minutes to go in the second hour. Anderson missed a top rope Swanton at 2:00. Hardy then gave him a quick Twist of Fate for a sudden three count.

WINNER: Hardy in 3:00.

-Afterward Hardy checked on Anderson, who smiled and appeared to be okay with the quick loss. Abyss's music played and he made the first appearance of the show. He brought a board to the ring with a bunch of nails sticking out. The ref yanked it from him. Hardy and Anderson attacked Abyss. Abyss came back and clotheslined both, then gave Hardy a Black Hole Slam. He gave Anderson a big boot. Abyss swung the board at Anderson, but Anderson ducked and it got stuck on the turnbuckle. Abyss yanked hard and the buckle padding came off with the board. RVD charged out and went after Abyss. Abyss grabbed him by the throat and tossed him to the ground. Hardy then got up and looked at Abyss. Anderson grabbed a chair and wound up behind Hardy as if he was going to hit him. Hardy turned around and Anderson stepped forward and hit Abyss instead. Good ambiguous teaser. RVD then hit Abyss with a Van Daminator, reverse kicking a chair into Abyss's face. RVD, Hardy, and Anderson celebrated together in the ring. RVD shook hands with Anderson. They had a staredown that started friendly and got slightly more intense. Abyss rose from ringside as the show ended.

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