ROH TV Report
March 29, 2014
Taped in Philadelphia, Pa.
Report by Mike Metzger, PWTorch VIP Member

The new ROH signature aired for the second consecutive week, followed by the ROH TV opening.

Kevin Kelly opened the show by announcing tonight’s main event between “Unbreakable” Michael Elgin and “Phenomenal” A.J. Styles!

1 - ROH tag team champions REDRAGON (Bobby Fish & Kyle O’Reilly) vs. BRUTAL BURGERS (Bob Evans & Cheeseburger) - non-title match

Before the match, the announcers added some context by talking about the recent history between these two teams. There was the Fish Tank segment on last week’s show where the tag champs verbally and physically abused Cheeseburger. ReDRagon also used some shenanigans when Bobby Fish defeated Cheeseburger in an arm wrestling match at HonorCon in Philadelphia.

Cheeseburger and O’Reilly started off. Cheeseburger went for a test of strength, but ducked behind O’Reilly instead. Unfortunately for Cheeseburger, he couldn’t lift O’Reilly up for a German suplex. They did a comedy spot where Cheeseburger slapped O’Reilly in the face and then immediately ran to his corner and tagged in “Brutal” Bob.

O’Reilly tagged Fish in response. They chain wrestled for 30 seconds until Evans sent Fish to the mat with a headlock. Evans dragged Fish into his corner and tagged in Cheeseburger. Cheeseburger again did the Crash Holly “let me try to suplex my much larger opponent” spot, but this time Evans helped him get Fish into the air. O’Reilly tried to run in, but Evans slammed him to the mat and then followed up by slamming his own partner onto the prone body of O’Reilly!

Cheeseburger then charged at Fish in the corner, but Fish just yanked him down to the mat. Fish tagged in O’Reilly. The champs tried to double-team Cheeseburger, but he was just too fast for them. Cheeseburger tagged in his partner and “Brutal” Bob cleaned house. O’Reilly was able to fight back with some kicks and a legsweep. On the outside, Raymond Rowe and Hanson were scouting the match. Rowe and Hanson will be challenging reDRagon in a three-way at “Supercard of Honor.”

Back in the ring, Evans clotheslined Fish and tagged in Cheeseburger. The newcomer started attacking the champs, but Cheeseburger was outnumbered before long. ReDRagon double-teamed Cheeseburger with some vicious kicks. Cheeseburger went for a desperation cross-body, but was caught by the champs. Evans came in and again helped Cheeseburger by dropkicking him directly into reDRagon!

Cheeseburger charged at Fish in the corner and then head-scissored O’Reilly directly into Fish! Cheeseburger nailed O’Reilly with a stunner, but could only get a nearfall! This drew a “Cheeseburger” chant from the crowd. Evans then helped Cheeseburger yet again with a double-chokeslam on Fish!

The champions started clicking with some solid offense. O’Reilly nailed Cheeseburger with a knee from the top rope, but Evans was able to break up the pinball attempt. The champs then started double-teaming “Brutal” Bob with some kicks. They threw Evans to the outside and then hit “Chasing the Dragon” on Cheeseburger for the pin.

WINNER: reDRagon via pinfall at 8:00 (*1/2)

ANALYSIS: This went a little too long for a comedy match. Don’t get me wrong - I’m totally fine with the champs getting a victory before “Supercard of Honor” - but I really think this should have been more of a squash for reDRagon.

[Commercial Break]

They recapped a few weeks ago on ROH TV when Outlaw, Inc. asked Kevin Steen to join them. Steen refused and Outlaw, Inc. attacked him, of course. The twist came when Cliff Compton ran in to save Steen. Now we’ll all have the pleasure of seeing Steen and Compton team up against Outlaw, Inc. [/sarcasm]

A promo video aired for ROH’s upcoming shows featuring talent from NJPW. Okada, Tanahashi, Nakamura, Kushida, Jado, Gedo, and Jushin “Thunder” Liger were all featured in the package. As reported earlier this week by the Torch, ROH will return to live iPPV with two shows in May, “Global Wars” and War of the Worlds.”

[Commercial Break]

Back from break, Steve Corino was as giddy as a schoolboy when ROH champion Adam Cole joined the commentary desk for the main event. The running gag on commentary was Cole playing hard to get whenever Corino sang his praises.

2 - A.J. STYLES vs. MICHAEL ELGIN

The Code of Honor was adhered to. Both men felt each other out for the first minute. A.J. came out on top with a side headlock. Elgin reversed and both men traded holds for another minute. Styles eventually went for a shoulderblock, but was sent to the mat by Elgin. A.J. rolled out of the ring for a moment. Back in the ring, Elgin challenged Styles to a test of strength, but A.J. replied by saying, “you gotta be out of your mind!”

They started chain wrestling again at 3:30. Elgin nailed Styles on his back with forearms, but A.J. wrestled him to the corner. Styles hit a snapmare and then kicked Elgin in the back. Elgin immediately got up as to tell Styles not to “poke the bear” like that. They traded blows again, with A.J. coming out on top with an armbar on the mat. ROH went to commercial at 5:25.

[Commercial Break]

Back at 7:55 of the contest, Styles shoved Elgin to the floor and then nailed him with a baseball slide from the ring to the outside! A.J. continued his offense by throwing Elgin in the hockey boards. Styles threw Elgin back into the ring and delivered a backbreaker. Styles delivered some elbows to the back of Elgin, followed up with some kicks. Eventually, Elgin caught one of the kicks. Elgin tried to mount an offensive, but was quickly dropkicked by Styles. Styles scored a nearfall and then went right into a chinlock.

During the resthold, Corino ran to the back and got Cole some coffee. In the ring, both men jockeyed for position until Elgin hit his standing suplex. He held Styles in the air for a count of thirty and then suplexed him to the mat! Now inn control, Elgin hammered on Styles in one corner and then whipped him to the opposite corner. Elgin did it again, this time causing A.J. to flip into the corner. ROH went to break at 13:00.

[During this break, Jay Lethal cut a promo advertising J.G. Wentworth. And you thought some of those backstage product placement skits in WWE were bad!]

ROH returned at 15:40 of the match and this time Elgin threw A.J. to the outside. Elgin hit Styles a few times and then followed up with a running boot to the face. He threw Styles into the ring and then delivered a huge shoulder block from the top rope. Elgin scored a nearfall as the fans, perhaps prematurely, chanted “this is awesome.”

Elgin then applied a chinlock of his own. This lasted for about thirty seconds, until A.J. tried to battle out. Both men traded blows in the center of the ring, until Styles hit a Pele kick out of nowhere! Styles charged at Elgin in the corner, but was caught and just slammed down by Elgin. Styles went for a springboard move off the ropes, but Elgin countered with a dropkick. Styles held onto the ropes, otherwise he would’ve been sent to the floor. Elgin then charged at Styles in the ropes, but Styles ducked, causing Elgin to crash and burn onto the floor. A.J. immediately followed up with his patented moonsault into a reverse DDT from the apron to the floor!

The referee counted to 17, but Elgin was able to make it back in the ring. Both men traded blows at 21:00, culminating with A.J. hitting his Superman Punch from the top rope. This didn’t seem to phase Elgin, however, as the big man immediately got to his feet. Styles stayed in control and nailed Elgin with Adam Cole’s patented Death Valley Driver over his knee. Adam Cole was livid on commentary. Somehow, Elgin fought back and nailed A.J. with a Black Hole Slam. Elgin could only get a two count, as the show went to another commercial at 22:40.

[Commercial Break]

The show returned at 24:40 of the match, and Elgin had A.J. on the top rope for a superplex. A.J. fought out and went for a sunset flip powerbomb, but Elgin held on. Both men continued to battle in the corner until A.J. got Elgin into a torture rack and then slammed him to the mat. A.J. scored a couple of nearfalls, but could not put Elgin away. Styles then went for the Styles Clash, but Elgin reversed into a standing suplex. A.J. fought out and tried to moonsault Elgin, but Elgin caught A.J. and hit him with a Tombstone piledriver! Elgin went fore the cover, but could only get a two count.

Elgin appeared to be going for the Buckle Bomb, but Styles fought out from underneath. Elgin tried again, but Styles was able to attack the knee of Elgin. Styles applied the Calf Killer, but Elgin was able to fight out by ramming the head of Styles to the mat! Styles set Elgin up on the second rope and nailed him with a huracanrana. Kevin Kelly announced that there were only 45 seconds left in television time. Styles hit a 450 splash into a leg drop, but could only get a two count. The 30-minute time limit then expired and the match was declared a draw.

WINNER: Time limit draw at 30:00. (***)

ANALYSIS: The match was technically sound and lasted thirty minutes, but it was really just average-at-best. Definitely A.J.’s least-inspired effort since returning to ROH. This match really suffered from having no back-story, being babyface vs. babyface, and lacking any real sense of urgency. I can’t remember the last time an ROH match featured two separate chinlocks. Adam Cole was entertaining at ringside, but this match really didn’t further anything at all. I guess this fits with the whole “crowded title picture” storyline, but I have a feeling they are really starting to test the patience of the viewing audience.

After the match, Elgin grabbed the microphone and challenged Styles to five more minutes. Both men looked ready to fight, but Adam Cole protested on the outside. Apparently, Cole liked the fact that a draw meant neither man was closer to a title shot against him.

It looked as if the five minute overtime was about to start, but Cole grabbed the ring bell from the timekeeper! The champion then ran into the ring and nailed both Elgin and Styles with the title belt. Jay Briscoe ran out to make the save, but Cole high-tailed it to the entrance way. Thinking he was home free, Cole turned around to discover that Kevin Steen was standing directly behind him! Steen chased Cole through the arena, but the champion was able to get away. The camera panned to all of the potential ROH Title challengers in the ring, as the show faded to black.

FINAL THOUGHTS: Skippable show, even if you are a diehard A.J. Styles fan. It’s a real shame that they are wasting the talent of returning stars like Styles and Chris Hero on this “crowded title picture” storyline. Instead of developing heated rivalries, ROH is instead treating viewers to thrown-together matches that don’t mean anything in the long run. Hopefully this will change when ROH returns to iPPV in May.

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