By Wade Keller, PWTorch editor

KELLER'S TNA LOCKDOWN PPV TAKE
APRIL 15, 2012
LIVE FROM NASHVILLE, TENN.
AIRED LIVE ON PAY-PER-VIEW

1 – TEAM ERIC (Bully Ray & Gunner & Kazarian & Christopher Daniels & Eric Bischoff) vs. TEAM GARETT (Austin Aries & Mr. Anderson & Rob Van Dam & A.J. Styles & Garett Bischoff)

-I wouldn't have predicted they'd begin with the Team Garett vs. Team Eric “Bischoff War Games.” There's really no reason to have a War Games style match with this elaborate of a set of rules if it qualifies as an opening match. I don't think the Smackdown World Title should be an opening match, either.

-Interesting to hear the Nashville fans cheering for Austin Aries to enter the cage to help Garett Bischoff against Gunner and Bully Ray. I wonder if he's the lowest paid wrestler in the ring?

-Kaz shaved his head, something he wasn't willing to do for Vince McMahon. With the thinning hair on top, he was going with that slicked back cover-up strategy, but the new look works for him better. Plus, there are just too many slicked back hairstyles in wrestling at any given time.

-Eric Bischoff cowered in the corner of the cage behind a ringpost. It doesn't really fit his volunteering to enter the match that he'd be so petrified once in the cage.

-The cage roof lowered once RVD entered, the tenth and final entrant in the match. The wrestlers began using weapons that were hanging from the roof.

RVD hit a Five-Star Frogsplash and then a Van Daminator to Bully Ray, but Daniels caught RVD with an Angel's Wings. Everyone else was knocked out on the mat other than Eric. Garett surprised Daniels with a face plant move that got zero crowd pop. Eric then attacked Garett with a kendo stick. He celebrated too long, though, and Garett whacked him over the head with a guitar for the win.

-Tenay and Taz talked about the stip of the match dictating that it's the last of Eric Bischoff you'll see on TV and the last time Eric can use the Bischoff name. Shouldn't Garett have been given the bonus of getting to use a new last name without the Bischoff albatross reminding everyone of his getting shoved to the front of the line for TV time and a push.

WINNERS: Team Garett... STAR RATING: Matches of this type follow a formula and once everyone is inside the ring, there's not much anyone can do without bumping into someone else. (**1/2)

RINGSIDE: They showed Tenay and Taz at the announce desk at ringside. I don't know if it was intended to come across the way it did, but Taz said he was quite sure it'd be easy to follow that match.

2 – SAMOA JOE & MAGNUS vs. MOTOR CITY MACHINE GUNS – TNA World Tag Team Championship Match

-The crowd oohed and ahhed for some moves, but didn't really seem to care who won with any passion either way, so the 12 minute match was pretty forgettable. The finishing sequence was pretty cool, though, with Joe carrying Sabin and splashing on top of Shelley with Sabin under him, then Magnus hitting a running elbow drop for the win.

-TNA needs to get some heel heat on a tag team.

WINNERS: Joe & Magnus to retain in 12:00.... STAR RATING (*3/4)

BACKSTAGE: Jeremy Borash resurfaced for backstage interviews. They have a monitor set up to track Twitter comments on the PPV. He then interviewed Robbie E. and Robbie T.

3 – ROBBIE E. (w/Robbie T.) vs. DEVON – TV Title Match

-We got the obligatory mid-ring early match chinlock from Robbie E. I don't get using a move like that in every match that nobody sees as anything more than a rudimentary, boring relic hold that hasn't been seen as the least bit entertaining or credible in decades. Every move or hold should be at least either entertaining or credible, and ideally both.

-The weak crowd didn't help this listless short match. The post-match attack from Robbie T sets up the long-awaited Rob Terry vs. Devon feud we've all been hoping to see the last couple years.

WINNER: Devon in 4:00 to retain the TV Title. (1/4*)

BACKSTAGE: Borash interviewed Matt Morgan who said his mindset in this match is sweet revenge. He said Crimson turned his back on him and then ran his mouth about it, so tonight he answers for his sins. He said the cage is his prison cell and he'll make Crimson his “little red-headed bitch.” Few wrestlers can call Crimson “little,” but Morgan towers over him.

4 – GAIL KIM vs. VELVET SKY – TNA Knockouts Title match

-Taz was again saddened by Sky not rubbing her crotch seductively against the middle rope, so Taz couldn't declare, “Let the pigeons loose!” Maybe Dixie Carter or someone at Spike TV finally got what Taz was referring to and freaked out. Or maybe Sky decided it was demeaning to be known for that.

-They announced that Matt Morgan was trending on Twitter at this point.

-A distraction at ringside by Madison Rayne gave Kim time to recover and then roll up Sky from behind for the win. Yes, Rayne was annoying when she was yanking on the side of the cage and yelling, but Sky looked undisciplined in letting that distract her since Rayne was unable to actually do anything from outside the cage. It's one of those finishes that makes the babyface look stupid.

WINNER: Kim in 7:00 to retain the TNA Knockouts Title.

RINGSIDE: Tenay and Taz talked about the outcome of the previous match, but it was mindless cliches and gibberish because it's hard to cover for a babyface who acts with such a lack of focus and costs herself the most important match of her career.

IN-RING SEGMENT: Ric Flair's music interrupted Tenay and Taz. He walked to the ring. He complained about his friend Eric Bischoff being unfairly eliminated from TNA. Hulk Hogan interrupted and acknowledged that Flair is the greatest wrestler ever, but told him to stop complaining. He said TNA is a land of law and order, therefore Eric Bischoff can never be on TNA TV again nor can he use his last name, “not even at a flea market.” Hogan told Flair the fans know they'd tear the roof off the place if they fought. Flair began to take off his jacket when Hogan punched him to the mat. Hogan left the ring. Flair recovered and threw a fit.

-Flair looked more dignified than he has on TNA TV in a while. Hogan looked like vintage Hogan, too. They'll be happy with that aspect of things – that in 2012 they can still be Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair and not look sadly old. That said, what was the point? Is this the start of another feud between Hogan and Flair, now that Hogan is the G.M. and Bischoff is gone, thus opening the door for a bigger role for Flair?

5 – MATT MORGAN vs. CRIMSON

-Crimson carries himself well on his way to the ring, like a confident, credible heel.

-It is noteworthy that this match was positioned this late on the show, after the War Games ten-man match and after three title matches. Could be a sign they plan to give a big push to one or both of them. It didn't get a lot of TV time, though, and because of that felt out of place this late on the card.

-They each stood on the top rope fighting. Crimson kicked Morgan's leg, and Morgan crotched the top rope. He then fell and sold a leg injury from his leg getting caught in the bottom rope. Crimson then climbed over the top of the cage for the win.

WINNER: Crimson in 8:00... STAR RATING (*1/4): Flat finish, but done to keep Crimson's undefeated streak alive without “burying” Morgan.

6 – KURT ANGLE vs. JEFF HARDY

-Angle controlled the offense for several minutes, then Hardy had his turn.

-Part of the crowd chanted “Holy sh--!” after a top rope Angle slam.

-Hardy tried to escape over the top of the cage. Angle yanked him back in. Hardy put

-Deep into the match Hardy hit two Swanton splashes off the top rope leading to a near fall.

-A minute later the crowd rose and popped as Hardy stood on top of the cage and landed a Swanton on Angle for the win.

-Hardy circled the ring and slapped hands while limping. Angle was helped to the back.

WINNER: Hardy in 15:00... STAR RATING: Hardy is still seen as a star, and he and Angle put in a PPV-worthy effort here. (***1/4)

ANNOUNCERS: Taz and Tenay did a nice job making viewers think they saw something special and important with that previous match, with a focus in particular on the top of the cage Swanton.

7 – ROSITA & SARITA vs. ERIC YOUNG & ODB

-Throw away anything I said about match order meaning anything. It's like they did it randomly and just sat back ready to laugh at us trying to make sense of it. I know this is, by design, the comedy filler match to provide a buffer between Angle-Hardy and Roode-Storm, but it's unnecessary and just makes the match order seem arbitrary in this situation.

-ODB won with her finisher on Rosita. ODB and Young made out and rolled around in the ring. Taz: “They're going to do this in front of everybody? There's kids in this building, and me!” Young slapped ODB on the butt. Taz told them to take to the Motel 6 down the road. ODB wiped Young's chest sweat on her breasts as they celebrated.

WINNERS: ODB & Young to retain the Knockouts Tag Team Titles.

ANNOUNCERS: Taz and Tenay talked about key happenings so far on the show. It really says a lot that Crimson keeping his undefeated streak alive in a cage against his former tag partner isn't worth a mention. Then they debated who would win the main event.

BACKSTAGE: Borashn interviewed Roode backstage. Roode said he will enter that cage and prove to the world what he has been saying, “I will always be better than you.” He said tonight isn't just a wrestling match, it's a fight and he's out for blood. He said they hate each other. He closed with his tag line that he is the “It Factor” of pro wrestling. Still not sure if TNA has defined what that means, exactly.

8 – ROBERT ROODE vs. JAMES STORM – TNA Impact Wrestling World Hvt. Title Match

-Storm attacked Roode at ringside and they brawled for five minutes before entering the cage. Storm picked up a chair and swung it, but Roode moved. Roode then clotheslined Storm from behind face-first into the cage. Storm ducked under the ring and bladed as Roode took a swig of Storm's beer. Roode sprayed beer in the face of Storm and then threw him into the cage where the match began.

-The mics picked up Roode yelling at Storm, “Fight, you pussy.”

-15 minutes in Roode tried to escape over the top of the cage. Storm met him on the top rope and rammed his head into the cage until he fell to the mat.

-At 17:00 Storm played to the crowd as he signaled for the Last Call superkick. He kicked the ref instead of Roode, though, thanks to Roode pulling him into the path of the kick. Roode apparently gave Storm a low blow off camera that the announcers didn't even catch. That gave Roode an opening to stand at the cage door and easily drop to the floor and win, but instead he asked Earl Hebner to hand him the beer bottles. Hebner did. What?!? Roode then bashed Storm over the head with a beer bottle, then called Hebner into the ring. Hebner counted, but Storm kicked out at two. If the sequence leading to that kickout wasn't so lame, they might have gotten a bigger crowd pop.

-Storm surprised Roode with the Last Call out of nowhere next. Both were slow to get up. Storm got up and gave Roode another Last Call, but the kick sent Roode through the cage door to the floor, therefore Roode won.

-The show closed with Storm entering the crwod and hugging a woman, presumably his mother, as medics tended to Roode who was passed out with the belt over his chest on the floor.

WINNER: Roode in 20:00 (25:00 counting the pre-bell brawl at ringside) to retain the World Hvt. Title. ... STAR RATING: The pace was pretty slow early. The final few minutes was a mix of idiocy and drama, with yet another lucky win for Roode that left the crowd disappointed. (***)

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