WCW SLAMBOREE PPV RESULTS
May 7, 2000
Kansas City, Mo.
Report by Wade Keller, PWTorch editor

Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson, and Mark Madden introduced the show...

(1) Chris Candido (w/Tammy Sytch) beat The Artist (w/Paisley) at 8:00 to retain the Cruiserweight Title. Sytch did some mic work before the match. By 2:40 they were fighting on the raised rampway. At 3:00 Artist scored a two count. At 5:00 Artist powered Candido into a powerbomb. Between 5:00 and 6:00 they screwed up two moves badly prompting boos and a chant of "You suck! You suck!" A tough, but perceptive, crowd. At 6:30 Artist hit a Samoan drop off the top rope, but before he could make the cover, Sytch distracted the ref. Paisley then got into it with Sytch on the rampway. Sytch hit Artist with a chair and Candido scored a nearfall. Schiavone called it a three count and the music started, but the ref called it only a two count. The match continued. Candido hit a piledriver and followed with a top rope headbutt for the pin. Candido took some nice bumps throughout the match. (**)

(2) Terry Funk pinned Norman Smiley & Ralphus at 10:10 to retain the Hardcore Title. Funk went looking for Norman. He checked the bathroom again. In the stall was Norman's mystery partner. Norman surprised Funk from behind with a fire extinguisher and got early advantage in the match. They knocked over the interview set backstage. The mystery partner hit Funk with some very weak garbage can shots. Madden called him the most ineffective mystery partner ever. Funk no-sold his garbage can shots and then took him down with one shot of his own. At 7:00 it was revealed to be Ralphus, who somehow managed to get in worse shape since we last saw him. Funk ripped down the back of his pants revealing Raphus's butt. Norman gave Funk a shot with a ladder and then gave him the Big Wiggle. He followed with a chairshot. Ralphus asked Norman if he could do the Wiggle. Ralphus tried to do the Wiggle but instead of the innocent Wiggle it looked like he was performing a sexual act. In the end, Funk pinned Smiley with a chairshot and a roll-up. Is Ralphus "New Blood" or a "Millionaire"? Absurd, but fun match. Fewer missed moves than the opener. (**)

Okerlund interviewed David Arquette as he got out of his limo. Arquette said his wife Courtney Cox may have gotten a million per episode deal, but he made a million on his own. He said he had to get to the building alone because Dallas Page doesn't consider him a sports entertainer (foreshadowing the finish of the main event).

(3) Sean Stasiak beat Curt Hennig at 7:53. They showed the Misfits at ringside wearing fluorescent green, orange, and purple body outfits. Hudson said they looked ready for war. War in what kind of world? Some psychedelic drug–crazed civilization where those colors would help disguise you? To quote Edge and Christian, we couldn't see them, all we could see were floating heads. At 6:00 Stasiak went to a sleeper. Hennig came back with forearms, but almost out of nowhere Stasiak hit the HennigPlex for the clean three count. Bland match with no electricity or inspiration. (*)

Backstage Russo tried to talk to Scott Steiner, but Steiner told him to stay away from him. Madden downplayed the apparent tension between the two.

(4) Scott Steiner beat Hugh Morrus at 6:25. Hugh Morrus said before the match Bischoff gave him his fake name to humiliate him. He said his new name is Hugh G. Rection. My question is if Scott beat Hugh G. Rection, is that legal in public? The announcers called him Captain Rection during the match. When Hugh kicked out at 3:50 before the three count, Scott grabbed the ref by the throat to intimidate him. The ref shortly thereafter jumped out of the ring to avoid Scott's wrath. At 7:15 Hugh caught a charging Scott with a boot and then splashed him in the corner. Hugh went for another running corner splash, but Scott caught him with a clothesline and followed with a suplex powerbomb. At 8:30 Hugh reversed Steiner's tombstone attempt and then went to the top rope for his moonsault. Scott moved (but Hugh's feet caught him in the face anyway). Scott applied the Steiner Recliner for the win. Good finishing few minutes, but otherwise just average action and pacing. After the match Booker ran in to stop Steiner's post-match attack on Hugh. (**1/2)

Okerlund interviewed Kanyon about all of the Bischoff suck-ups. Kanyon said he learned a long time ago you get over in the business not by kissing ass, but by kicking ass.

(5) Kanyon fought Mike Awesome to a no contest at 13:00. The opening minute was hot with Kanyon stopping an Awesome boot and Awesome following up with a flying bodyblock over the top rope. The crowd broke into a brief "ECW" chant. At 2:00 Kanyon followed with a somersault bodyblock onto Awesome on the floor. Awesome hit a nice top rope clothesline at 3:00. At 3:45 Awesome nailed Kanyon with a stiff chairshot at ringside. As they brawled by the announcers' table, some fans chanted "ECW." Madden annoyingly said "Whassup!" which apparently was Madden's lame attempt to move out of the late–'70s with his pop culture references. He skipped right past the Macarena. Kanyon gave Awesome the reverse neckbreaker off the top rope for a near fall. At 9:30 Awesome powerbombed Kanyon right onto his head. It was one scary looking move. Kanyon thankfully was okay. Awesome left the ring to lift the ringside mats off the cement floor. He reentered the ring and attempted to powerbomb Kanyon over the top rope, but Kanyon escaped. Awesome then nailed him with a released back suplex. At 11:20 Awesome set up Kanyon on the rampway, but Kevin Nash came out and attacked Awesome. The New Bloods and Millionaires ran out and had a battle royal type brawl. Nash hugged Flair, Sting, and Kanyon after they cleared the ring of the New Blood. Best action and big spots of the night, but the lack of a meaningful finish hurt. (***)

(6) Lex Luger beat Buff Bagwell at 9:30. As Luger posed, Madden said, "Look, he's got a good body. How exciting!" They posed for a while, Luger hit a couple of atomic drops, and then Buff went to an interminable chinlock on the mat. At 6:00 Luger made his exciting comeback with some elbows. Then Buff went back to another chinlock, but it was worth it because we got to see another Luger comeback at 8:20. Luger hit two hot clotheslines and a powerslam. Liz came to ringside and swung a bat at Buff, but Buff grabbed it from her and nailed Lex in the ribs. Buff followed with a neckbreaker. When Buff went to the top rope for the Blockbuster, Liz hit him with the bat. Luger then put Buff in the Torture Rack for the win. Absolutely dreadful match. There were no missed moves because you have to do a move in order to have a chance to miss one. Chuck Palumbo, dressed as Luger, attacked Luger. Madden said he is Russo's new "Total Package." Palumbo racked Luger. (1/4*)

Okerlund interviewed Douglas who talked about cutting seven long, boorish, repetitive promos about Flair. At least he has an objective perspective on the past few years of his career. The first three years of those anti-Flair promos were great, but from there it was time to move on.

(7) Shane Douglas pinned Ric Flair at 8:04. Flair talked about how he and Harley Race spent their careers protecting the heritage of the WCW Title. He said he was going to kick Douglas's "ECW ass." Flair threw some chops early and had the crowd on his side. Douglas caught Flair on the top rope and slammed him to the mat, then applied the figure-four. Fans chanted "Flair, Flair." Flair escaped and nailed Douglas with a low blow. They went to ringside where Flair chopped away at Douglas and whipped him into the guardrail. Flair ripped on Madden, then threw Douglas onto the announcers' table right in front of him. At 5:00 Douglas took a chain out of his boots and hit Flair. Flair came back and nailed Douglas with a low kick and then a kick to the back of Douglas's knee. At 7:50 Flair went for another figure four, but a guy in a Sting mask hit him with a bat. Then Douglas small packaged Flair for the win. Schiavone assumed it was Vince Russo from the start which made it obvious it wasn't. Douglas nailed Flair with the chain again, then left the ring. As the fake Sting, Buff, and Douglas left, Flair assumed the Sting guy was Russo and called him back into the ring. Luger dragged the fake Sting into the ring. The real Russo then came out and hit Flair from behind. The fake Sting hit Flair with a statue of liberty figurine. The fake Sting unmasked revealing David Flair. Russo said to start the clock. Nash then walked out and attacked David. Russo refused to back down, so Nash kicked him and set up a Jackknife, but David made the save with a bat. Russo and David hugged. (**1/2)

(8) Sting pinned Vampiro at 6:55. At 3:00 Vamp used a pipe as a weapon. They fought onto the rampway where Vamp nailed Sting with a 360 degree roundhouse kick. At 5:30 Sting hit Vamp with a low blow to take over, then gave Vamp a superbomb out of the corner. At 6:30 Sting hit two Stinger Deathdrops. Afterward, Sting began to leave the ring, but then reentered and nailed Vampiro across the head with the pipe one more time. It was almost like one of the final scenes of "Casino." Good energy in the match. (***)

Tenay interviewed Page and Arquette. Arquette was dressed in a goofy ring robe. He said he knows he looks good, but he's scared.

Tenay then interviewed Kidman, Eric Bischoff, Kimberly, and Torrie Wilson. Bischoff vowed to call the match right down the middle.

(9) Hulk Hogan beat Kidman (w/Torrie Wilson) at 13:37 with Eric Bischoff as special referee. Early in the match Hogan threw Kidman to ringside and beat on him. Back in the ring Hogan dropped Kidman over a chair in the ring. Kidman took the bump with no protection, almost flattening the chair. Hogan took a huracanrana and then bumped off of Kidman's follow–up dropkick. At 4:00 Hogan began whipping Kidman. Kidman got the belt and whipped Hogan. Hogan came back and whipped Kidman over the top rope. Nice bump. Hogan threw Kidman back into the ring and covered him. Bischoff refused to make a count. Hogan gave Kidman a suplex. Bischoff refused to count again. After complaining to Bischoff, Hogan went for three elbows, but Kidman moved out of the way each time. Kidman went after Hogan with stomps, but again Hogan tossed Kidman to ringside. Hogan threw Kidman onto the announcing table. Hogan began his comeback at 8:20 including punches, a big boot, and the legdrop. The crowd actually popped, but Bischoff stepped in the way before he could give Kidman the legdrop. Hogan punched Bischoff out of the ring, then Hogan gave Kidman the legdrop. Hogan punched Kidman ten times, but Bischoff entered with a chair. Hogan grabbed the chair and nailed Bischoff. Hogan grabbed two tables, one of which was already broken. As Hogan was about to plant Bischoff through a table, Kidman hit Hogan with a chair from behind. Kidman covered Hogan. A groggy Bischoff counted, but Hogan kicked out at two. Hogan came up bleeding. Hogan kicked a chair into a charging Kidman, then planted Bischoff through a table. The crowd popped big for the move. Hogan brought a third table into the ring, but Kidman caught him with a low blow and a chairshot. Fans chanted, "Hogan, Hogan." Kidman went for a splash on the table, but Hogan moved. Horace Hogan came out and grabbed Bischoff's arm and slapped the mat three times to end the match. Best Hogan match in a long time, and it wasn't just Kidman's doing. Hogan worked very hard, too. (***1/4)

(10) Jeff Jarrett beat Dallas Page and David Arquette at 15:20 in a three-tiered cage match to capture the WCW Title. Jarrett went after Arquette early. Arquette jumped out of the ring and tried to climb the wall of the huge bottom tier of the cage. Page got to Jarrett before Jarrett got to Arquette. Arquette kept running from Jarrett.When Jarrett hit Page in the ribs with a ladder, Madden said, "Now those ribs will be taped for another seven months." By 4:00 Jarrett was bleeding. At 5:00 Page tried to climb a ladder to the second tier, but Jarrett took him to the mat with a belly-to-back suplex. Page powerbombed Jarrett off the ladder. Jarrett whipped Page into the ladder and Page took some nice bumps into it. At 8:00 Page got to the second level, then quickly used the bolt cutters to open the door to get to the roof outside of the second tier of the cage. Page rammed Jarrett into the wall of the second tier. The wall gave way and the announcers made a big deal about how close they came to falling 20 feet to the ground. Page powerbombed Jarrett through a table as everyone held their breath fearing that the roof might give way. Page teased whipping Jarrett off the roof of the cage to the floor, but Jarrett stopped him. Arquette had been watching the match from the ring. At 12:30 Arquette snuck to the second level of the cage and then quickly bypassed the preoccupied wrestlers to get to the top of the cage. Mike Awesome came out and attacked Page. Page flattened him with a Diamond Cutter. They made it to the third level - the guitar room - and Page handed Arquette a guitar to protect the top of the cage from Jarrett getting there. Page slapped Jarrett's head in the cage door. The announcers kept talking about what a great friend Arquette was being to Page, which gave away that Arquette was turning on Page. Sure enough, Arquette nailed Page with the guitar. I wish the announcers hadn't laid it on so thick because the finish would have surprised me otherwise. Jarrett got the belt and won the match. Awesome was setting up an Awesome Bomb on Page, but Kanyon ran out for the save. Awesome threw Kanyon off the second tier of the cage. Kanyon landed on the rampway (that's what the rampway was there for) which appeared to be gimmicked for his landing. Schiavone said, "Oh my God, he broke his back!" (***1/2)

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