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KELLER'S RAW REPORT
OCTOBER 4, 2004
LIVE ON SPIKE TV FROM MADISON SQUARE GARDEN

-Highlights aired of Randy Orton's beat down at the hands of Evolution last week.

-Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler introduced the show as the camera panned the recognizable MSG setting.

-Ric Flair and Triple H walked to the ring. Flair said that last week he said Triple H is the greatest wrestler alive today. He said he had to make a correction. Hunter didn't flinch. Flair said Hunter is the greatest wrestler of all time. He said he is the only person qualified to declare that. He shifted to Orton, saying Orton had been barred from the building for his own safety by Eric Bischoff. Flair then announced that he'd be facing Orton at Taboo Tuesday with fans deciding the stipulation. He compared Orton to a virgin, adding: "Do you know how many virgins I've made scream, bleed, and cry all night long? That's my specialty." Hunter then took the mic and complained that now some pimply-faced 16 year old gets to decide the fate of a legend like Ric Flair. These promos about Taboo Tuesday may be repetitive, but they're staying on message at least just like President Bush. Hunter said, "Just like an overrated Hollywood actor says, it doesn't matter what you think." That's either a dig at Rock to get him upset for usage of his catchphrase, or it's planting a seed for Rock wrestling Hunter at WrestleMania 21 next year.

Chris Jericho's music interrupted Hunter's complaining. Jericho stepped out with a wireless mic in hand. Jericho, somewhat ironically, complained about Hunter and Flair's promo sounding like a rerun, then declared, "This isn't Taboo Tuesday, it is Raw is Jericho." Jericho polled the crowd on whether Hunter was the best wrestler. The crowd booed. He asked the crowd if Hunter was a horse's ass. The crowd cheered. Jericho then said he was the one who came up with the concept for fan voting at Taboo Tuesday. Jericho said he is going to be laughing when he watched Hunter lose the belt at Taboo Tuesday. Flair and Hunter freaked out. They ripped off their jackets. Flair, at his best, demanded that Jericho come to the ring and let Hunter teach him a lesson. "Now! Now! Now" said Flair as he neared a nervous breakdown. When Jericho retreated, Flair called him a coward. Jericho returned with a chair. Batista attacked Jericho from behind in one of the clumsier looking collisions you'll see on TV. Ross said Batista threw Jericho "literally to the wolves" when he threw him into the ring. Chris Benoit ran to the ring to even the odds. Edge then joined in, too. Ross asked, "What in the hell is Edge doing here?" Edge speared Triple H. The three babyfaces stood in the ring together. Ross said there is no doubt in his mind that Edge "is hungry." Good opening segment. It got two of the World Title match candidates involved in a brawl with Hunter. From Ross's commentary, it sounds like they're going to try to sway fans into voting for Edge more than Benoit. We'll see if that evens out over time.

-Ross shifted to a plug for Raw. He said: "Folks, if you're looking for action, this is the place to be tonight. I guarantee ya'. The roof will come off Madison Square Garden when we see the entrance of Shawn Michaels."

-Coach interviewed Christian, with Tomko, backstage. Christian hyped his match with Michaels. He threw the word "torch" into the promo; the plug is always appreciated.

1 -- SHAWN MICHAELS vs. CHRISTIAN (w/Tyson Tomko)

I don't know if his reduced job duties are the reason, but Ross seemed especially on his game and energized tonight compared to usual. He was oozing with genuine excitement which was contagious watching the show on TV. They worked a rapid-fire opening three minutes. Michaels set up an early Sweet Chin Music, but Tomko yanked Christian out of the ring by his feet to help him avoid the kick. Michaels then gave Tomko the Sweet Chin Music before they cut to a break.

[Commercial Break]

They showed footage of Tomko needing help from two officials to get to the back. Christian avoided a Michaels dive at ringside, so Michaels landed on the security barrier. Christian took over offense. When Michaels teased a comeback, Christian poked him in the eye. Christian scored some near falls. At 10:00 Michaels made a full-fledged comeback. The crowd was really into the match. At 11:30 Christian snuck in a surprise Unprettier on a reversal. Ross declared the match over. Christian scored a near fall. The crowd popped for the kickout. Christian went to the top rope. Michaels caught him up there, threw some punches, and backdropped him. Michaels then came off with his top rope flying elbow. Michaels then showed more fire than perhaps Ric Flair earlier. Ross described it as an "out of body experience." He stomped the mat again and then superkicked Christian for the convincing win.

WINNER: Michaels at 13:21.

STAR RATING: ***1/4 -- That was really good. Yeah, yeah, another five minutes would have been great, but I'll take 13-plus on TV between these two. That was one of Christian's better matches. Michaels looked as excited, upbeat, and energized as the Democrats "spin room" after the Kerry-Bush debate last Thursday night. They both were on their game and had really good timing.

[Commercial Break]

-Ross announced Chris Benoit vs. Batista would be featured later on Raw, plus Hunter vs. Chris Jericho. This is a PPV-level line-up. Since they didn't hype those two matches ahead of time, that's often an indication that they don't plan to deliver full-fledged matches, so don't get your hopes up.

-Todd Grisham interviewed Lita in a sitdown setting backstage. She said she got herself into quite a predicament, but she doesn't regret her pregnancy. She said at first she did, but since then she felt the baby moving inside of her and she wanted to give birth to it. "My baby was the only thing innocent in all of this," she said. "Now, I will never know what my baby looks like. I will never hold my baby boy. My baby boy was taken away from me. Snitsky took him away from me." Grisham said Snitsky says her losing her baby isn't his fault. Lita freaked out and yelled, "Whose fault is it?" She said she entered the ring because she was tired of seeing people get hurt. She said while she has no love for Kane, but for once she hopes Kane does exactly what he says he's going to do. "Make no mistake, Snitsky is a dead man." At this point it probably doesn't matter, but I don't buy anyone's emotions in this at this point. Lita has decided to forgive Kane for forcing her to break off her engagement to the love of her life and marry him, and then it's revealed the sex he forced on her resulted in a pregnancy, but now she holds more of a grudge against Snitsky for inadvertently knocking Kane into Lita costing her the pregnancy more? I guess who could really expect her to be rational at this point, but what a mess.

-They cut to Eric Bischoff backstage talking to someone with fingernail polish, shaking hands and saying they have a deal. "So I'll see you in the ring later," he said. Coach barged in and asked why she was there. "You don't believe you can trust her, do you?" Bischoff told Coach to trust him. He asked Coach to go find his nephew Eugene because he had major news about his match against Eugene at Taboo Tuesday. Coach said he was scheduled to interview Gene Snitsky and things are likely to get volatile, and "that'S not (my) scene." Bischoff told Coach he understood his concern, so he put J.R. in charge of the interview instead.

[Commercial Break]

-Jim Ross stood mid-ring and introduced Gene Snitsky who wheeled a baby carriage to the ring. Snitsky said it wasn't his fault. Kane quickly interrupted and walked to the ring. Snisky threw the baby carriage at Kane. Then when Kane entered the ring, he hit Kane with a pipe he had hidden in the carriage. He KO'd Kane with it and then choked him with it. Kane bled from the forehead.

[Commercial Break]

-They showed Kane staggered to the back during the commercial break. "Good god almighty," said Ross.

2 -- CHRIS BENOIT vs. BATISTA (w/Ric Flair)

Jerry Lawler said, "He is as strong as they come, maybe even stronger." Huh? At 3:00 Batista powered out of a Sharpshooter attempt. Benoit, though, followed up with the German suplex series. The tide turned when Flair threw Benoit into the ringpost at ringside as Batista distracted the ref. As Batista set up Benoit for a Batista Bomb, Randy Orton had seen enough, so he charged to the ring and made the save, clearing the ring of Flair and Batista. He showed good fire and he got a good pop. Bischoff came out and yelled that he gave Orton the night off. Security dragged Orton to the back. Batista and Flair jumped Orton, knocking over security members in the process. Ross called it a cheap shot by Flair on Orton.

WINNER: Batista via DQ at 4:54. No decision was announced, but for WWE Fantasy players, clearly Orton's interference will be grounds for DQ'ing Benoit.

STAR RATING: *

[Commercial Break]

-Bischoff said since he came out to get rid of Orton, he might as well take the opportunity to address Taboo Tuesday. He said he doesn't like Taboo Tuesday, but if it has to be done, he's going to be sure it's done right. He said Snitsky would face Kane in a match where one of three weapons are legal: (1) a lead pipe, (2) a steel chair, or (3) a steel chain. He also announced that everyone who isn't on a Taboo Tuesday ballot would be eligible to face Jericho for the IC Title. He said that is about 20 people and he wants to see them in his office later. Bischoff called Eugene to the ring. "The only mark he's made in his life is in his underwear," Lawler said about Eugene during his ring entrance. Bischoff told Eugene as hard as it is to believe, someone backstage has a crush on him. He said she wanted to meet him. He revealed it was Carmella, the runner up in the Raw Diva Contest. Ross said he thought the last they had seen of Carmella was on Raw last week. Lawler said he was skeptical of Carmella being attracted to Eugene. He said she batted her eyelashes at him backstage. Ross, in the understatement of the week, said, "You're old enough to be her uncle."

Bischoff said Carmella should have won the competition. He said the difference between her and Christy is that she was in Playboy. Eugene didn't know what that was. Bischoff whispered a description to Eugene. He got bashful and covered his eyes. Carmella said: "I love bald men. If you were bald, you'd be perfect." Bischoff said if the fans vote for them to have the head-shaving stipulation and if Eugene lost on purpose to him and got his head shaved, Carmella would think he was perfect. Eugene, not realizing he could just shave his head on his own, agreed that that would be a good idea. Eugene said he would agree to that on one condition. "I want my girlfriend to kiss me now," he said. Eugene closed his eyes and puckered his lips. Bischoff encouraged Carmella to do it. She leaned in, but then couldn't go through with it.

Eugene said, "I wanna see her boobies!" He jumped and clapped. Fans applauded and chanted "Eugene." Carmella told Eugene that he and all of the fans aren't in the same league as her. Eugene began crying. Bischoff said things didn't go the way he wanted and told Carmella her match at Taboo Tuesday is still on. Bischoff told Eugene that she isn't the only one who doesn't like him. "Nobody likes you," he said. Christy then stepped out. Ross said Christy and Carmella would be wrestling at Taboo Tuesday. Christy walked out and went face-to-face with Carmella, then shoved her to the ground. Christy then gave Eugene a little peck on the lips to rejuvenate his morale. She then leaped into his arms and made out with him. "Eugene may never be the same," Ross said, adding that she is an "uninhibited fireball."

[Commercial Break]

3 -- LA RESISTANCE vs. HURRICANE & ROSEY -- WWE Tag Team Title match

They joined La Resistance in mid-verse singing their anthem. "Dogs are barking all over Brooklyn," Ross said. Lawler gave Ross a hard time for not standing and removing his hat. Hurricane went to the top rope. When Sylvain Grenier yanked on his leg, Hurricane fell the other way as he was expecting to get shoved instead. La Resistance finished off Hurricane with their double-team finisher for a quick, decisive win. Afterward, Robert Conway (with obvious help from Rosey) pulled Rosey's face mask over his eyes. Rosey then slammed Hurricane, assuming it was a member of La Resistance.

WINNERS: La Resistance at 2:16.

STAR RATING: 1/4* -- Too short to amount to much.

-A segment aired showing WWE being honored by Make-a-Wish.

[Commercial Break]

-Another Simon System segment aired.

-Coach interviewed Edge, asking him why fans should vote for him. He said Michaels and Benoit have had about a million title shots each and a million matches against Hunter. He said he's faced Hunter "zilch" and he's had "zilch" title reigns. He said it's not that he doesn't deserve it. He said he was stripped of the IC Title unfairly. He said he has fought through various injuries and rehabbing to get on the ballot. He said whether or not voters are fans of his or not, he's the one who they know in their hearts actually deserves it the most. He didn't seem likable, but instead came across bitter. I assume that was the intent.

-Bischoff addressed all of the wrestlers backstage who were eligible for the Jericho title shot. He said he wanted them to have a chance to see Jericho up close so he was giving them the assignment of being lumberjacks for the main event between Jericho and Hunter. The wrestlers in the room were: Tajiri, La Resistance, Batista, Rhyno, Shelton Benjamin, Maven, Rodney Mack, Tyson Tomko, Christian, William Regal, Chuck Palumbo, and Val Venis.

-They showed Stacy Keibler warming up for her match against Molly.

[Commercial Break]

4 -- STACY KEIBLER vs. MOLLY HOLLY

Trish joined Lawler and Ross at ringside. Trish explained that she doesn't like Christy because "I'm not into sluts." Her delivery was hilarious. Lawler and Ross admired the length of Stacy's legs. Ross knows the exact length in inches. When Molly waved her finger at Stacy a la Dikembe Mutumbo, Stacy bit it. If only some of Mutumbo's opponents would have done that. A crawler on the screen showed the "Team Names" of the top ten standings in the WWE Fantasy online game. "Killer Bees" are in first place with 383 points. That's Bruce Mitchell's team, by the way. Stacy rolled up Molly after a distraction from Trish backfired.

WINNERS: Stacy at 2:55.

STAR RATING: 1/4* -- It accomplished it's purpose just fine.

-They plugged the main event and showed the lumberjacks. Rosey, Hurricane, and Steven Richards were also on the graphic on the screen in addition to those shown on camera during Bischoff's locker room address a few minutes earlier. It looked like Coach was included, too.

[Commercial Break]

-Ross plugged that Raw would be in Manchester, England next week live. He said it was the biggest arena in England.

5 -- CHRIS JERICHO vs. TRIPLE H - Lumberjack Match

Jericho jump-started the match by surprising Hunter with a clothesline. He backdropped Hunter, who hadn't even re moved his World Title belt yet. They didn't play up the significance of the World Champ facing the IC Champ aspect of this match. Jericho fended off an early ringside swarm by the lumberjacks. When he returned to the ring he went for an early Walls of Jericho. Hunter blocked it, so Jericho turned it into a catapult. Then he schoolboyed Hunter for a two count. After some chops, Hunter reversed a Jericho whip and tossed him over the top rope Steven Richards stomped away at Jericho. Ross called Richards "somewhat unbalanced." Jericho flew off the top rope with a flying elbow at Hunter. Rhino, retaliating for Jericho giving him a slidekick earlier, then gave Jericho a Gore. The ref was distracted. Hunter draped him arm over Jericho and scored the three count. Orton ran to the ring and gave Batista an RKO. When Christian went after him, he gave him an RKO also. He gave RKOs to a few others, too. This was a script they dusted off from a show-ending Steve Austin-Stunner spree.

WINNER: Triple H at 5:20.

STAR RATING: *1/2 -- Good chaotic high-energy five minute match.

[Chris Jericho art credit Joseph Borzotta (c) PWTorch]

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