By Lee Stevens, Torch specialist

Thank you for joining me as put Raw "Under The Microscope." This is not a complete recap of the show. Instead, it's a closer look at certain details of Monday's broadcast.

It's a celebration!

Batista kicked off the evening by celebrating his victory over Randy Orton at Extreme Rules and he quickly added that he was now a "five-time Heavyweight Champion." Congratulations on the win and the accuracy, because his five wins are actually split between two belts. He has taken the World Heavyweight Title four times and this is the first time he has held the WWE Title, although he's currently holding it with only one arm.

His first victory came at WrestleMania 21 in 2005 against Triple H, followed by a title win against King Booker at the 2006 Survivor Series. He would reclaim the title in September 2007 in a Triple Threat match against Rey Mysterio and The Great Khali, and then in October 2008, he defeated Chris Jericho at Cyber Sunday.

Batista left the building early, but he also left the evening still the champion. A one day reign would have been incredibly short, but that isn't necessarily new to "The Animal." After defeating Jericho at the PPV, he held the title for only another week as he dropped the belt in a cage match on Raw just eight days later.

Have a seat

As Legacy held down Batista and Randy Orton slowly lined up to take another shot at the Champ, we had a perfect close-up of one of the more important parts of the segment: the chair. Taking a closer look, the word COSCO was clearly embedded in the chair, long before Batista's arm received the same treatment.

According to the company's website, Cosco Home and Office Products started in 1939 with the inventions of a tin matchbox that dispensed new matches while providing a place for used ones. Luckily for Orton they didn't stop there. I haven't seen the tin matchbox, but I don't think that would have had the same visual impact. These days, they specialize in tables and chairs available in wood, steel, or a mixture of both. Just in case you're planning your own private TLC match, yes, they also sell ladders.

The company should not be confused with Costco, which is a wholesale warehouse chain that also sells tables, ladders and chairs. Ironically, if you type in "Legacy" at the Costco website, you receive eight options including wooden boxes, urns, and a designer grill.

It matters

The quote of the night on the serious side belongs to the new champ. As Batista was being attended to by the medical staff, he urgently said "please get my title." Those four little words did more to give the belt credibility than anything else that happened on the show. With Vickie Guerrero insisting that the belt could be lost without the champion even in the building, it was good to see that the person currently holding the title actually cared about what happened to it.

It doesn't matter

Apparently not everyone values the gold as much as "The Animal." As Kofi Kingston made his way to the ring, Lillian Garcia proudly proclaimed him the "Intercontinental Champion." I'm sure nobody was more surprised than Kingston as he is currently the United States Champion. The mistake could have been overlooked a bit easier if it hadn't preceded a segment which featured his opponent, William Regal, insisting that the crowd deserved better than having "A Jamaican as your United States Champion."

For the record, Kingston is the United States Champion. Chris Jericho is the Intercontinental Champion. Batista is the WWE Champion. The Rock is The People's Champion. Will Champion is a drummer for Coldplay. A spark plug could be a Champion. Bob "Spark Plug" Holly was a tag team champion.

Little things

I did appreciate Jerry Lawler's somber tone going into the Kingston match as it had been only a few minutes since the Batista beating. I realize the show must go on, but if we are supposed to care about what just happened, it starts with the announcers caring about what just happened. It was also appropriate to see Edge limping out from the backstage area after his brutal match with Jeff Hardy the night before.

Just wait for his Cosby Show slam

The Miz continued his strong microphone work in calling out John Cena again this week, even though his latest dig wasn't as current as some others. "It may not be Tim Allen, but it's about to be Tool Time," insisted Miz, in an obvious reference to former Tim Allen series "Home Improvement." On the show, Allen portrayed Time "The Tool Man" Taylor, the host of his own cable TV show called "Tool Time."

The show was sponsored by Binford Tools and featured Al Borland as Taylor's trusty sidekick. The show also brought us the Tool Time Girl, portrayed by several actresses including Pamela Anderson, who also made an appearance at the 1995 Royal Rumble. Anderson left the show after two seasons to run in slow motion with the other lifeguards on Baywatch. Richard Karn, the man who played Al Borland, would later host a revamped version of "Family Feud," and Allen would take on the role of Santa Claus.

You're excused

Vickie Guerrero's sudden departure gave us more insults, a suddenly single Edge and a high-profile job opening. Ironically, the rude send-off brings to mind the last time Edge was on the market. Lita bore the brunt of both as she left WWE with Cryme Tyme auctioning off embarrassing personal items. As for Edge and Vickie, no word on who will get custody of Bam Neely. It's always the kids who get hurt.

Looking ahead to possible new General Managers, many readers have already written in about one of the obvious choices. Next week's Raw is in Charlotte and Ric Flair has reportedly re-signed with WWE, but has so far maintained that he is retired from in-ring action. The only flaw with this plan is that it is too obvious. Vince McMahon often likes swerving viewers just for the sake of the surprise, even if it risks long-term credibility. I still expect it to be Flair, but don't be too shocked if one of the McMahon children claim the title.

If you want to buy something for me for Father's Day, I would like to see Randy Savage named General Manager just long enough to promote his DVD and then everyone realizes "what have we done?" and we move forward as if nothing had happened. I know it won't happen, let me have my moment.

My moment

(thank you)


I do, no wait!

Edge asked for a divorce from the one true love of his life as long as she was giving him title shots and that may be his only remaining course of action. The lovebirds were married in North Carolina and to get an annulment in that state, you either need to prove that you are first cousins, under the age of 16, or prove that one partner was physically impotent at the time of the marriage. Impotence must be permanent, incurable, and medically diagnosed by a doctor. Although Edge quickly reminded us that they never consummated the marriage, we have never heard any mention of the fact that the Rated-R Superstar has G-rated quality equipment. I'm fine with never finding out.

Thanks, Dad

This wasn't the first time that Legacy and The Colons crossed paths and certainly not the first time for their famous families. Carlos Colon, father of Carlito and Primo, actually competed in the 1993 Royal Rumble match alongside Ted DiBiase Sr. DiBiase also shared memorable ring time with the father of Cody Rhodes as "The Million Dollar Man" faced off against "The Common Man" Dusty Rhodes in the early '90s. The feud also led to the WWF introduction of Dustin Rhodes, who was attacked while sitting in the crowd during a match. He was most recently seen teaming with Hornswoggle and Santino Marella.

That's odd

Speaking of Goldust, Santino and Hornswoggle, Michael Cole stated the obvious as he referred to the rather "interesting" team, but by saying that they are "one of the oddest teams in WWE history" is clearly disrespecting the legacy of the squad with odd in its name. The Oddities were formed by The Jackyl (Don Callis) and consisted of Kurrgan, The Giant Silva, and Golga. Kurrgan had worked with Jackyl as a member of The Truth Commission, a group made up of Recon, Sniper, and Tank. Tank also wrestled as Mantaur, while Recon may be better known as Bull Buchanan.

As for the other Oddities, The Giant Silva has dabbled in mixed martial arts, while Golga sadly is no longer with us. John Tenta was better known without the mask as Earthquake. Tenta died of cancer in 2006. His Golga character was fascinated with South Park and even took a Cartman doll to the ring with him. Insane Clown Posse would accompany them to the ring at various times and Howard Stern regulars Hank the angry dwarf and Crackhead Bob shared quality time with them on a very special episode of Raw.

Goldust, Santino and Hornswoggle? Sorry, you guys are playing for second place.

Lee Stevens examines Raw and Smackdown with "Under The Microscope." You can leave comments below or you can e-mail him at GLStevens.Torch@gmail.com.

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