By Shane McKinley, PWTorch Specialist

The Rocky IV Match At Cyber Sunday

I would not put it past WWE to rig the voting, but if it is real what a feat it could be if WWE could get Kozlov wrestling in the match. Agreed that Jeff Hardy vs. Triple H would be okay, but I am more interested in seeing the Russian. This comes from how Kozlov was being presented, and what was key was the Triple H backstage skit. Long gone was the wise-cracking Triple H, instead there was some solid, good stuff. Put both Kozlov and Jeff as a big deal (while still making him the top dog because he is WWE champion). Better route to take of hyping a real challenge instead of Triple H brushing off his opponents like lint.

It could be debated of whether there was a sincere bone in his body as he pushed Kozlov during his announcing of the match, but I would rather take this version of Triple H than the one who hogs all of the spotlight on him. Nice showcase for Kozlov during his match, as Kozlov pretty much dominates Jeff. They could have gone the route of Triple H training in the snow while Kolzov gets steroids pumped into him. Hear JR scream, "The Russian bleeds! The Russian bleeds!". So that is something to look forward to for Smackdown fans. Is Kozlov really supposed to be in the main event picture? And what the hell happened to Umaga? I am guessing that John Cena will make his return at Suvivor Series (since on both Raw and Smackdown they have been running a Cena video package twice, and I cannot see them running Cena video packages for three months. If they had brains in their heads).

On a side note, if I have not had watched wrestling, I would never know the meaning of the word "xenophobia". You get the feeling that as long as wrestling lives, so will booing heels from a foreign country. I would rather Kozlov get away from the cartoonish side and more to kicking ass.

Big Show Makes It His Show On Smackdown

You tell me what was the better big man promo: Kevin Nash's on Impact or Big Show's on Smackdown. On Raw I look forward to what Jericho has to say, and on Smackdown Big Show is definetly the one wrestler I look forward too. He is on a nice roll. Not really sure why his match with the Undertaker can be voted "excusively" on wwe.com (why not have both texting and internet voting for all matches), but the Last Man Standing match (duh) would something I would like to see. The "I Quit" match does not look half bad, but who in their right mind would vote for the "Knockout Match"? Big Show even managed to wade through that particularly long winded opening segment.

Nice Move With The Smackdown Tag Team Champs, Greggy Helms

Oddly enough, the tag team champions of Carlito (also a nice WWE comeback) and Primo have more heat on them than the overhyped Second Generation (Rhodes, Dibase, Manu). Carlito was pretty much dead in the water months back (well, pretty much since Wrestlemania 23). You would figure by now that the Second Generation would get away from hammy promos and 4 minute tag team matches, but you would be wrong.

I guess Gregory Helms just goes after easy targets. A interesting way to keep people from changing the channel during some particular wrestler's entrances. Although I hate that phrase "I am just saying". Ugh.

MVJ: Most Valuable Jobber

The character of MVP is near borderline jobber nowadays. I am hoping they would do a serious side to the cartoony MVP (his new name is "Porter"). At least there is a interesting side angle with the "incentive clause" that if he wins one more match, he will get a big fat paycheck. Could MVP not just bribe some poor chump in getting themselves disqualified during a match with him, thus earning him a victory? I know, I am using logic again.

Anyways, MVP squares off against R-Truth. R-T looks pretty much gassed 2 minutes into his matches (maybe because he raps his opening song). So far I am not impressed by R-T. And for some odd reason Shelton Benjamin is watching the match backstage, but he is juggling gold balls. Odd. Then MVP does the job. Hell, how did MVP go toe to toe with Batista months ago in matches and now is losing to new comers who pull off two spinny moves? MVP still gets promo time (even though they are no longer fresh, he just spews a lot of cliches). R-T wins. Shelton continues to juggle his balls. What the hell.

Later in the show WWE goes down the creepy route with Festus lusting after Maria. Just creepy. This is pretty much a "George 'The Animal' Steele' longing after Elizabeth, but there is no Macho Man Randy Savage. Enter MVP. This man needs a win, fast. WWE cannot hold a grudge forever, right?

Bad News Brown (Ezekiel), The Serious Khali, Vince Neil From Motley Crue

Like the finisher by Ezekiel (A standing Rock Bottom). I also like the Great Khali, even though many would disagree (speaking about his match with Undertaker, I get a kick out of the bit where the ref runs away from the Undertaker). The oddest thing about this show was Kizarnky. Kizarnky, or a Vince Neil lookalike, speaks in carny during his video package. Wow, that is making the fans actually have to work in understanding what he is saying. Kind of interesting to figure out carny language, but I would love it if there was a Shakespearean wrestling character who did promos using such language. You sir, are a savage!

Kenny Dystrka Does The Cheesiest Turnbuckle Bump Ever

Right on, JR. I too would like to put that "bubblewrap" incident with Mad Dog and Kenny D out of my mind. I just wanted to point out that Kenny gets his head bashed into the turnbuckle, he does a backward flip, spins 360 degrees in the air, and flops like a fish. I do not know whether to applaud or boo.

SMACKDOWN'S FINAL VERDICT: In The Middle Of Absurdity

Big Show was the star of the night, especially on the mic. If Kozlov could be featured in a long match he might be taken seriously. The Smackdown Tag Team Champs are over more than the Raw Tag Team Champs (probably because they actually defend the belt and have actual tag team matches). MVP's stock is crashing, nobody is working on the next RVD, Ezekiel looks to be a bad man, and Triple H is being portrayed better. Solid stuff to build from.

LEAVING YOU WITH MY ABSURD THOUGHT: I know that this is stupid (nay, even absurd), but when Triple H looked the camera dead in the eye during his promo, I felt he was looking right at me for all of the bad stuff I wrote about him. I just saw his big ass nose and all of those blade marks and I felt scared. I squirmed in my chair. I am sorry! Please don't hurt me! Triple H then proceeded to climb through the screen and kick my ass. Then all of the fellas from TNA were at my front door to put me through a glass table because of my harsh words. Now there would be something TNA could do: Instead of this "young poor good guys vs. rich old evil veterans", they could do "wrestlers vs. those whiny internet writers".

Email is mckinley.torch@gmail.com.

We suggest these recent related articles...

10/5 WWE Raw Hits & Misses: Natalya vs. Paige, Owens vs. Cara, Stephanie McMahon, Sasha Banks, Xavier Woods

COLLECTIBLES COLUMN: The History of Foam Hands in Pro Wrestling

9/28 WWE Raw Hits & Misses: Kane's Split Personality, Divas Revolution, Heyman & Big Show, Reigns vs. Wyatt