TV REPORTS 6/7 WWE Raw Report: Mallory's virtual time "alt. perspective" coverage
Jun 7, 2004 - 9:12:00 PM
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By Mallory Mahling, Torch Team Contributor
WWE Raw "Virtual Time" Alt. Perspective Coverage
June 7, 2004
Live from Albany, New York
Aired on Spike TV
Report by Mallory Mahling, Torch Team Contributor
Ongoing Alternative Perspective Review of the Show
Quarter Hour 1
Raw was live tonight from the Pepsi Arena in Albany, New York.
Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler welcomed viewers to the show.
Stacy Keibler came out in a rather demure (for her) sundress to remind all the ladies that the deadline for the 2004 Raw Diva Search is tomorrow. Additional details are available at WWE.com.
Stacy then demonstrated her own personal ring entrance to the delight of the teenage boys in the audience.
Gail Kim came out and demonstrated her own ring entrance and talked some trash to Stacy (who looked at least three feet taller than Kim).
(1) Lita over Gail Kim. This was a so-so match, with Gail Kim showing some improved ring skills and dominating most of the match. Lita began to rally. DDT and a cover and Lita took the win. The DDT looked scary, as Kim landed right on her head.
In his office, Eric Bischoff was talking with Johnny Nitro. Jonathan Coachman barged in and Bischoff ask him to help out--in a match with Eugene at Bad Blood. Coach began to chuckle, then realized it wasn't a joke. Nitro pointed out that the joke might be on Coach if Eugene were to beat him.
Bischoff said that had given him an idea. Tonight it would be Eugene vs. Johnny Nitro, and if Nitro lost, he'd hear Donald Trump's two favorite words--"You're fired."
(Commercial break)
Quarter Hour 2
(2) Batista (w/Ric Flair) over Shelton Benjamin. Batista controlled the early part of the match. Benjamin with an impressive crossbody, but Batista came back with a power slam. Benjamin refused to let the size difference slow him down. When Flair tried to interfere, Benjamin took care of him. But with Shelton's attention diverted, Batista attempted a power bomb. Clothesline off the top by Benjamin, but Orton, who'd come to ringside, distracted the ref. Sit down power bomb, and Batista got the pin and the win. Shelton's luck had run out, gloated the King.
Not satisfied with the win, Orton, Flair, and Batista continued to pummel Benjamin long after the bell rang, and Orton's coup de grace was a belt shot--the very same belt that will be on the line Sunday night at Bad Blood.
(Commercial break)
Quarter Hour 3
Moments ago, Randy Orton had pasted Shelton Benjamin with the Intercontinental Title Belt. Benjamin had been helped backstage during the commercial break.
Chris Benoit was in the locker room talking with Edge about spears. Edge seemed unduly sensitive about Benoit discussing spears, maybe because Edge had speared Benoit during their tag title match last week.
Coach came in and said Edge had the night off, but Benoit was booked for a two-on-one handicap match with La Resistance as payback for helping Eugene last week.
Highlights were shown of the Rock at an MTV award show last weekend.
Bischoff was on the phone when Trish and Tyson Tomko walked in. He said he had pressing business and quickly ended the call. Bischoff told Trish her problem would be solved at Bad Blood when Jericho would meet Tomko in the ring. Trish wanted an opportunity at Bad Blood, too, but before she could finish her thought, Kane stormed in and wanted to speak with Bischoff. Alone.
As Kane slammed the door of the General Manager's office, the show went to commercial. (Will Kane rip Eric's head off during the break?)
(Commercial break)
(3) Chris Jericho over A-Train via tap-out. A-Train went after Jericho's bandaged ribs right away, then slammed Jericho hard to the mat. The Hair Bear pressed Jericho over his head and dropped him to the mat. It wasn't easy, but Jericho turned the big guy over and had him tapping out of the Walls of Jericho in mere seconds.
Smackdown Rebound: Miss Jackie won the bikini contest; John Bradshaw Layfield announced that he wanted a bull rope match at the Great American Bash; Paul Heyman played more mind games with the Undertaker
Quarter Hour 4
It was time to play the Game.
(Commercial break)
Triple H said that in a few minutes he'd walk through the crowd and take his seat in the skybox. He wanted to watch the beginning of the end of Shawn Michaels. Randy Orton would be tearing Michaels apart and Trips didn't want to miss a minute of it. Sunday night at Bad Blood, he would prevail. He had never lost a Hell in a Cell Match. Blah, blah, blah. He wasn't sure he'd get ever to heaven, but promised to take them both to hell on Sunday night.
A series of clips showed the brutality that has led up to the Hell in a Cell match.
To be fair, a series of clips showed the times Shawn Michaels had dished out punishment to Triple H.
Triple H was flirting with the waitress in the skybox.
(Commercial break) (Is it just me, or does the new Joe Schmo looks a little like Randy Orton?)
(4) Handicap Match: La Resistance (Sylvain Grenier & Rob Conway & Kane) over Chris Benoit & Edge.William Hung Grenier began to sing the Canadian National Anthem. Ugh! Benoit headed out before he was through singing, and the King said Benoit might cause an international incident by interrupting the anthem. (That would hardly be on the same level as that other international incident.)
Quarter Hour 5
The fact that Benoit was taking on both of these guys did not seem to phase him. Then the obligatory double-teaming started, and Benoit was being worn down a move at a time.
The King noted that it would be ironic if Kane and Lita both became champions at Bad Blood. (Finally, somebody remembered that storyline.)
Edge headed out to the rescue and the referee called for the bell.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," shouted Eric Bischoff as he headed down the ramp. He granted Edge and Benoit a tag title rematch with La Resistance this Sunday at Bad Blood--which means Benoit will wrestle twice on Sunday night.
Then Bischoff announced that the match would continue tonight, but it would remain a handicap match. Kane would join La Resistance, making it 3 on 2.
(Commercial break)
Edge was in the ring with Grenier's arm around his neck. He was finally able to escape, then Kane and Benoit both tagged in. Kane was speared and Benoit head-butted him. Kane sat up, but Benoit put him in the crossface. Kane struggled and finally powered out of the move. Choke slam on Benoit, followed by a strange-looking cover, and Le Grand Rouge Machine took the win for Team Quebec.
(Commercial break)
The members of Evolution were living it up in the skybox.
Too Cool Coach came out and joined J.R. and the King on commentary.
(5) Eugene (w/William Regal) over Johnny Nitro. Eugene extended his hand in good sportsmanship to begin the match, but Nitro was not a good sport about it. No matter; Eugene got into wrestling mode and began to hand Nitro his ass. Eugene used moves borrowed from his favorites, including Junkyard Dog. The crowd was firmly behind Eugene, who pinned Nitro to win the match. Does that mean Nitro is history?
Coach's tune had changed. He was no longer cocky; he was rattled and wanted a shot at Eugene tonight. Eugene obliged and knocked Coach off the stage and onto his rear end.
(Commercial break)
Quarter Hour 7
The official theme song for Bad Blood is "Sold Me."
The official matches are:
- Tag Team Title Match: La Resistance vs. Benoit & Edge.
- Championship Match: Chris Benoit vs. Kane.
- Intercontinental Title Match: Shelton Benjamin vs. Randy Orton.
- Fatal Four-Way Women's Title Match: Victoria vs. Lita vs. Gail Kim vs. Trish Stratus.
- Eugene vs. Jonathan Coachman.
- Chris Jericho vs. Tyson Tomko
- Triple H vs. Shawn Michaels in a Hell in a Cell Match.
Lita was on her cell phone, happily telling her sweetie (presumably Matt Hardy) that she would have a chance at the Women's Title at Bad Blood. She hung up and Kane was standing right behind her. He said they might both be champs on Sunday. She said she thought it was all over, but Kane cupped her chin and said he'd lied. Bwahahaha.
(Commercial break)
(6) Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton ended in a DQ. Good back and forth action to begin the match. Flair, Batista, and Triple H were keeping their eyes on the action in the ring (and staring daggers at Michaels).
Quarter Hour 8
Orton was concentrating on Michaels' shoulder and Michaels was hurting. The ref started a count and pulled Michaels' hair. too. (Some nights a guy can't win.) Orton with a drop kick that was no where near Michaels. Michaels put Orton in a Figure Four, but Orton reached the ropes to break the hold. Michaels was energized and Orton found himself in world of hurt.
Orton managed to kick Michaels into the ring post, but Michaels kicked him out of the ring and came after Orton with a crossbody to the outside.
Batista was shown heading to the ring.
"The collision will continue," promised J.R.
(Commercial break)
J.R. said Michaels had the heart of a warrior. (And the head of a pumpkin.) Batista slammed HBK into the ring post and he was busted open and bleeding badly. Michaels was wobbly and Orton was covered with Michaels' blood. Ewwww.
Orton went for a pin, but Michaels reached deep down and kicked out. Another drop kick by Orton (this one connected).
The two traded chops, then HBK hit Orton with a flying forearm.
Quarter Hour 9
Both were down on the mat and the ref began to count. HBK suddenly kipped up and was on the attack. Orton was down and HBK came off the top rope with an elbow. He started to tune up for the Sweet Chin Music, but Batista jumped into the ring. The referee called for the bell, and Batista got Michaels' size 12 right in the chops.
Orton got back into the ring with the steel chair. HBK grabbed it away from Orton, and the ref tried to take it away Michaels. Michaels punched the ref, then took the chair to Batista's heavily-tattooed backside.
In the skybox, Triple H was talking trash at HBK, who headed up the stairs to shut him up. The match continued in the skybox. As the show faded to black, Michaels was raining forearms on Triple H. How will it end? Tune in Sunday night for Bad Blood.
***
I love feedback and you can reach me at mallory_m_@hotmail.com. See you in The Lounge on Saturday.
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