TV REPORTS 3/13 NWA Wildside TV review: Onyx vs. Abyss, NWA Elite, Fast Eddie
Mar 15, 2004 - 6:10:00 PM
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Larry Goodman, Torch Team Contributor
NWA Wildside TV review
Aired in national syndication on March 13, 2004
Taped February 7, 2004 at the NWA Arena in Cornelia, Ga
By Larry Goodman, Torch Team Contributor
Steven Prazak and Dan "The Dragon" Wilson opened this edition of NWA Wildside with a review of the travesty that occurred in last week's main event. Wilson said Texas Death Club versus Altar Boy Luke and Gabriel was a good tag title match until the finish (agreed). The replay clearly showed Luke scoring a clean pin on Sexton with the guillotine legdrop. But that's when Andrew Thomas perpetrated "the most well conceived heist since Watergate" (Cut Wilson some slack. It was before his time). Luke grazed Thomas as he celebrated. Wilson said that Thomas looked like a meteor had shot him in the ass. Thomas ruled the match a DQ and returned the belts to TDC. In a rare understatement, Wilson called Thomas a thorn in Luke's side.
Prazak said that this week's show was "blessed" with an appearance by the full strength version of the NWA Elite. And in the main event, Onyx was putting the NWA Wildside Heavyweight Title on the line against the near (anyone over 6-6 qualifies) seven foot monster, Abyss, lead to the ring by Attorney Jeff G. Bailey.
(1) Jay Fury & Nick Halen beat Drew Blood & Scott Fowler. Drew Blood is such a catchy ring name that two indie guys are using the gimmick. Only the finishing sequence aired. Halen hit a modified rocker dropper and used that last ounce of energy to make a diving tag. Fury cleaned house. Fowler took a hilarious screaming bump over the top rope. Halen hit a plancha on Fowler. On the inside, Fury ducked a clothesline with the Jaytrix and caught Blood with the Enzufury for the pin. Good looking finish.
(2) The NWA Elite (Rainman & Azrael & Jason Cross with Jeff G. Bailey & Mikal Adryan) beat Murder One & Delirious & Matt Sydal (with Daizee Haze & Slim J) (TV time of 6:15). The match opened with a meeting of former tag partners, as Rainman and M-1 squared off for the first time in a Wildside ring. Wilson said that he knew of no animosity between them since they went their separate ways. Rainman sucker punched M-1 and they started trading. M-1 took over with chops. M-1 sent Rainman down with the Blazin' Lariat. Cover for two. Rainman used the trusty thumb to the eye and tagged. Azrael fared no better. M-1 turned his handspring back elbow into a Spinning Doja Bomb. Two count and a tag. Delirious and Azrael grappled for control. "Talk about two screwballs. You're looking at em'," said Wilson. Delirious tied Azrael up in knots for a two count. Cross tagged in and started bumping for the masked whirling dervish. Delirious worked an armdrag takedown into a lateral crucifix. Delirious and Sydal started hitting Cross from all sides with combo moves. Sydal got a pop with a standing moonsault off of Cross' back. Sydal got another two count with a corkscrew suplex. Sydal worked Cross over in the corner. Cross countered an old-fashioned Biel throw with a state-of-the-art double underhook rocker dropper. M-1 broke up the pin attempt. Sydal elbowed out of a loose rear chinlock. Cross rolled through on a sunset flip and leveled Sydal with a clothesline. It looked like Sydal took a bad bump on his neck. Legdrop and a tag made to Rainman. The Soul Assassin unloaded a barrage of blows. Sydal's chest looked like it was on fire. Back from commercial, Azrael and Sydal both went down on simultaneous high boots to the face. Tags both ways. M-1 cleaned house. All except for Rainman, who wasn't having any. M-1 hit an STO on Cross. Delirious wound up his throwing arm and charged. He hammered Cross with like a zillion clotheslines in the corner. Bailey got on the apron to protest. Haze pulled Bailey's pants down around his ankles. The crowd was delighted. Bailey fell off the apron in a heap. "Somewhere Dick Murdoch is smiling," said Prazak. J came flying into the fram to cut off Adryan, as this thing was becoming a total cluster. Adryan heaved J up against the announcer's booth. Delirious came off the top and had his head driven into the mat by Cross. One russian legsweep from hell and it was over. There was still a crazy melee going on at ringside. M-1 saved his little buddy, J from certain death at the hands of Adryan.
COMMENTS: There was a lot going on here. The work was impressive, especially considering that Sydal and Delirious arrived late due to road problems and had never worked with the Elite before. It was a fine balancing act of elevating the faces without making the Elite appear weak. The tease of a Rainman/Murder One feud somewhere down the road was interesting. And Bailey losing his pants was hilarious.
(3) The Masked Mr. D beat Jeff Lewis in 2:56. Jacey North was shown sprinting out of the building just as Mr. D was being introduced. Mr. D was said to hail from the French Quarter and was wearing North's stock "Magnum condoms" t-shirt. Lewis attacked D as he came through the ropes. Prazak was stumped. Wilson said that if it worked for Clark Kent, it could work for Jacey North. "But we don't have any phone booths in the NWA Arena. We barely have toilets," said Prazak. Lewis suplexed D and went to the top rope. D shook the ropes to crotch Lewis. D hit the crossed arms Iconoclasm. Barely a two count. Lewis sailed over the top rope when D ducked out of the way. D hit another move from North's playbook, the Tope Penisida. Back inside, Lewis dropped D on his head with the Final Curtain. Lewis went after the mask. He just about had that sucker off when the camera picked up North standing near the rail. Lewis started jawing with North. Naturally, D schoolboyed Lewis for the win. The fans cranked up the "loser" chant. North was letting Lewis have it. The officials had to restrain Lewis from going after North.
COMMENTS: Entertaining. Prazak and Wilson seem to bust out their best comedy material for the North/Lewis segments. Regular viewers would have been able to detect that it wasn't North under the mask (it was Skeeter Frost) and anticipate the finish. Fun segment in any case.
Lewis was livid. He stalked out of the building looking for North. He spied a masked man in the darkened parking lot. It was Delirious doing his reptilian facial expressions. "Who the hell are you?" said Lewis. Lewis vowed to get his hands on North and settle it once and for all.
(4) Fast Eddie (with Salvatore Rinauro) beat John McChessney to retain the NWA Wildside Junior Title (TV time of 8:25). Wilson gave the devil his due, stating that despite his association with Rinauro, Eddie had showed a lot of ability as champion. Eddie got McChessney off his feet and walked on his back. Eddie got a high five from Rinauro. Some crisply executed chain reversals here. Eddie used a handful of hair to maintain control of the side headlock. Prazak mentioned that it was an old Ronnie Garvin tactic. At 1:50, McChessney gave Eddie a receipt with a stiff kick to the spine. McChessney cinched in a rear chinlock, but Eddie reversed it back to the headlock. Shoved to the ropes and a shoulder tackle by Eddie. Leapfrog by McChessney. Eddie blocked a hiptoss. McChessney ducked a clothesline and backdropped Eddie to the apron. McChessney doubled Eddie over with a shoulder to the bread basket. McChessney hit a swinging neckbreaker across the ropes. McChessney got consecutive near falls with a floatover suplex and an atomic facebuster. Eddie rolled to outside for some aid from his cornerman. An old lady got the black box treatment for giving Eddie the middle finger. Prazak seemed surprised but that lady is capable of much worse. They played "whose head is getting slammed into the turnbuckle?" Eddie lost. Eddie wobbled on the apron. McChessney dove onto his back. Not much he could do from that position, except get hurt. Eddie shrugged him off and hit a springboard spinning heel kick for a near fall. Eddie started to work on McChessney's back. Back from commercial with several minutes clipped. Eddie had McChessney planted on the top rope, looking for his finisher. McChessney fought it off and hit a super ace crusher that left both men stunned. Eddie sold it with a full body twitch. Up at seven and trading bombs. McChessney took over. McChessney hit a wheelbarrow full nelson slam. Eddie barely kicked out in time. Pan to a shot of Rinauro, clutching his chest at ringside. Eddie slithered out of a crucifix powerbomb position and countered with his hellish russian legsweep. Back cover and McChessney rolled a shoulder. McChessney hit the Cliffhanger (DDT from a crucifix powerbomb position). McChessney gave Eddie a snake eyes from a tombstone piledriver position. Awesome move. Rinauro pulled McChessney out at the count of two. McChessney slammed Eddie and went to the top. Rinauro crotched him. Eddie hit the full rotation fallaway slam to score the pinfall. Rinauro congratulated Eddie but kept the belt resting comfortably on his own shoulder.
COMMENTS: A very pleasant surprise. A lot of it can be attributed to Eddie's phenomenal improvement as a worker, but props to McChessney on an impressive debut performance. Eddie's selling and Wilson's play by play work succeeded in getting McChessney over as a legitimate threat to take the title. McChessney has worked for Cleveland All Pro and has done a couple of TNA Explosion shots. He has interesting moveset and connected well with the fans, giving this match excellent heat. McChessney's young Sean Waltman physique needs work.
The viewers were treated to several minutes of close ups of Abyss moaning and sweating and clenching his fists, as Bailey primed his tortured monster. Bailey painted a grim picture of what was in store for Onyx.
You're only minutes away from Abyss tearing apart your ugly, stinking, smirking self...Death is imprinted on you like an invisible birthmark. Tonight, Abyss will perform open soul surgery on you and leave you an empty, hollow shell. You see your time has come to an end, Onyx. He's going to take you deep in the Black Hole and show you horrors you can never even imagine. What a triumph it will be, as your last days are spent being spoon fed carrots, with you being unable to even remember your own name. You see life as you know it grows short. Tonight, Abyss is coming to snuff you. And when your meaningless life flashes before you, just before you close your eyes and drift into unconsciousness, like a dog being put to sleep, let your last memory be: YOU NEVER SHOULD HAVE BLEEPED WITH JEFF G. BAILEY AND THE NWA ELITE.
(5) Onyx beat Abyss (with Jeff G. Bailey) to retain the NWA Wildside Heavyweight Title in 13:03. Forget the intros. Fists were flying. Abyss wouldn't budge on a whip attempt. Onyx used speed to maneuver Abyss into position for a clothesline over the top. A huge "Onyx" chant erupted, as the champion showed off his title belt. Onyx continued to exploit a major edge in mobility to befuddle the beast. Onyx used a drop toehold to set up the Jamaica City Dreams (dragon sleeper). Fans were calling for the tap out. Abyss got Onyx up on his back and rammed him into the turnbuckles. Abyss hit a DRIVING gorilla press slam. Onyx sold like all his wind was sucked out in one fell swoop. Abyss choked off the champion's air supply. Abyss intimidated ref Mike Posey so severely, that he ran from the ring in fear. Abyss was having more trouble keeping his shirt buttoned than he was handling the champion's gutshots. Abyss laced Onyx with a chop. Onyx fired back. Abyss reversed a whip and splashed Onyx in the corner. Onyx collapsed and rolled to the floor. Abyss whipped Onyx into the rails and posted him. The commentary brought out the fact that Bailey's "Onyx problem" had been going on for three years. It was back in 2001 that man, then known as Justice, was the Wildside champion. Wilson said the name changes but the monster remains the same. Abyss set a table up at ringside. Onyx trapped Abyss on the apron. Abyss was teetering on the edge of going backwards through the table, but he managed to goozle Onyx for a chokeslam. Onyx escaped. Abyss went for the torture drop backbreaker. Onyx escaped again. Abyss leveled Onyx with a high kick that showed light. Onyx sold it huge. Abyss beat Onyx down and dared him to get up. Onyx came up throwing punches. Abyss reversed a whip. Abyss took a flying crotch bump on a mad charge into the corner. Both men up at the count of eight. Onyx sent Abyss down with a flying shoulder block. Onyx got the behemoth off his feet for two amazing power moves, the Angry Man Slam and a powerslam. Abyss kicked out of the pin attempts. Onyx tried to end it with the Blackout. Abyss blocked it, sqaushing Posey in the process. Abyss hit the Black Hole Slam but no ref to count. Abyss smacked Posey in attempt to revive him. Onyx hit the Blackout, but Posey was still face down. Onyx woke Posey up. That gave Abyss time to recover and hit the torture drop backbreaker. Posey was there to make the count, but Onyx kicked out just before the three count. Abyss positioned Onyx for the chokeslam. Onyx brought a knee up into the monster's nuts and hit the Blackout. 1..2..3. Onyx retains. Posey was so shook up that he forgot to give the belt to Onyx. Abyss showed his displeasure with Posey by destroying him with the torture drop. A nerdy security guard hit the ring. "Gee. I wonder what's going to happen next?" said Prazak (his voice dripping with sarcasm). Abyss wasted no time sending the security dude crashing through the table. The camera panned across the carnage. Fade to black.
COMMENTS: The best title defense of what is turning out to be quite an impressive title run for Onyx. It was a great big man/little man match, with the added twist that this little man is also a genetic specimen. Few big men sell for smaller opponents as well as Abyss. I liked the way Abyss solved a major speed disadvantage by cutting off Onyx's air to make him a stationary target. Crowd was deep into Onyx's comeback. The dude is so damn strong that the fans believe.
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