By Jeremy Maes, Torch Team Contributor

WWE Heat Review
March 7, 2004
Taped 3/1/2004 in Atlanta, GA
Report by Jeremy Maes, Torch Team Contributor

Welcome everyone to another installment of the WWE’s highest rated B-Show, Sunday Night HEAT! We are a week away from the biggest Wrestlemania of all time and I for one am getting excited. Quick in-house note, next week’s review will be posted Monday instead of the usual prompt Sunday night deadline. So, don’t bother looking until Monday, alright?

One more in-house note, if anyone has a tape of last week’s HEAT please drop me a line. I have a loyal reader who desperately needs a copy.

Now, with all of that out of the way, let’s get to some HEAT!
Well, the music is the same as always so no one in the WWE took me up on my suggestion last week about changing the entrance music!

Coach and Snow welcome us, as always, to the show. Coachman says the road to Wrestlemania continues tonight. For once a statement like that is absolutely true.

Match #1: Renee Dupree w/Rob Conway defeated Spike Dudley. Spike is listed at 150 pounds, which makes me wonder if a tan would make him weigh a bit more. Spike starts quickly with headlock takedown. He synchs it in, thus we have already seen the first mat hold of the contest. Renee Dupree fights out with a huge backdrop and then goes on offense. Renee’s mat hold this week consists of a bear hug but Spike sells it very well by trying to fight out until he slowly goes limp from the pressure of Renee’s grasp. Get it? Spike went limp cause of Renee’s grasp? Oh I am killer. Spike fights his way out with some punches and they tumble to the mat. Spike pulls himself to his feet and Dupree charges. Spike tosses him over the top rope and then jumps on both Conway and Dupree. Back in the ring Spike dropkicks a fallen Dupree then stomps on his chest. Out of nowhere, Dupree thrusts Spike on his shoulders and plants him in the mat with a Death Valley Driver. Dupree covers him and gets the anti-climatic pinfall victory.

Match Satisfaction: I was with this match until the ending. Nothing has been done to establish Dupree as a singles competitor especially his finishing maneuver. So, when he caught Spike in the DVD I fully expected Spike to kick out. Apparently I was not the only one, the crowd was dead for the finish as well. An argument could be made that this is part of the WWE’s plan to get over the fact that finishes come from out of nowhere but that would be a cop out for the fact that Dupree, as great as he may well be, is an under established star.

During the commercials they showed an incredible trailer for ‘The Punisher.” This flick looks like it will be awesome and I say this with the full knowledge that the Punisher is a one-dimensional bit character that Marvel comics forced down our throats in the 90’s.

Back from break we get footage of Chris Benoit and Shawn Michaels tag-team meltdown from Raw. Benoit headbutts Michaels and covers Randy Orton. Michaels gets pissed and punches Benoit. Randy Orton rolls up HBK for the victory but no one cares as The Crippler and HBK go at it until Triple H runs in and attacks them both with the help of Evolution. Triple H pedigrees both men and then taunts them with his championship belt. Fade to commercial.

You know the Nike commercial taking different athletes and super-imposing them into different sports was a stroke of genius until I saw Michael Vick and Brian Urlacher in Colorado Avalanche uniforms. Seeing that it occurred to me why the Avalanche has suddenly started playing like the Minnesota Wild, as talented as they may be, they are just two more stiffs in Avalanche uniforms. Colorado, blech! Same goes for the sad sack, still not going to win the Stanley Cup even with Brian Leetch, Toronto Maple Leafs. Go Wings!

Match #2:Stevie Richards (sans Victoria) defeated Kyle Mceely. All right, the WWE has gone back to not announcing the jobber completely nor do they give them a graphic stating their name. Steven’s opponent is a smaller, incredibly muscular African-American with white shorts and black trim. There got that out of the way in a reasonable fashion. The kid has shown some good fire while handling Steven so far. Steven finally comes back and gives jobber-man a back elbow. Steven follows up his offense with a tribute to King Kong Bundy and gives Kyle and avalanche, blech. Steven then gives him the Stevie-T for the three count. After the match Stevie runs out of the ring and grabs a fan made sign that says “Stevie Night HEAT.

Match Satisfaction: This was nothing more than a space filler on the card although Steven looked motivated. Before he walked to the ring he took a page out of Christopher Daniels’ playbook and did a little bit of praying. It looked like a direct swipe, but not as annoying as when Daniels does it since Stevie is crazy and Daniels’ “Fallen Angel” gimmick means he is, um, what is his gimmick again?

Before going to commercial we are treated to some Enya type rip off music as a scroll of all of the WWE Hall of Fame inductees is shown. In order they are:
1) Jesse “The Body” Ventura
2) “The King” Harley Race
3) Superstar Billy Graham
4) Tito Santana
5) Sgt. Slaughter
6) Bobby “The Brain” Heenan
7) Don Muraco (sans “The Rock” nickname)
8) Greg “The Hammer” Valentine
9) Big John Studd
10) Junkyard Dog
11) Pete Rose

Coach and Snow go over Mick Foley’s appearance on Raw. They both agreed he would make an impact but they were surprised at the impact he did make.

Cut to the file footage where Mick says he is going to have a match with Flair, Bautista and Orton. Randy says he has heard the rumors so Mick should go to a pay phone and call Mr. Walking Tall and then after Wrestlemania he will take out both of their punk asses. Mick leaves the ring and tells Randy he can tell him to his face. See, Mick was coming back to Raw but he never said he was coming back to Raw alone.

“If ya smellllll, la, la, la, la….” Rock flies to the ring and beats up on Grandpa while his grandchildren stand in awe. Mick tosses out Bautista while Orton holds his head. Mick pulls out Socko (I mean why pay for it?) and lays it on Orton. Once done, Rock gives him the people’s elbow. Again, why wait until Sunday with a paying audience?

Rock grabs the mic and lays down a promo about being part of the biggest tag-team match of all time. Hey, I thought that was the Mega-Powers vs. the Twin Towers? Rock went to town and the crowd was eating up every word, which is nice since WWE crowds have been known to be a bit fickle about those leaving for greener pastures.

Coachman and Al Snow run down the Wrestlemania lineup. Everything looks good so far. Mostly everyone favorites will be on the card. The exceptions of course are Hurricane, Matt Hardy, Test, Scott Steiner, Maven, Steven Richards and Rosey, oh wait, I said favorites, so strike Hurricane and Rosey. Oh and Test and Steiner. I guess Maven also. Funny thing about the rest of the lineup, they have Brock Lesnar squaring off with Goldberg. I thought he was fighting Steve Austin?

Match #3: The Dudley Boys defeated VeniStorm. D-Von and Lance start the contest and D-Von quickly locks on an arm lock. Lance squirms free and runs into the ropes where D-Von meets him with a shoulder block. Bubba tags in and goes to town with Lance. Bubba takes him over and gives him an elbow lock. D-Von is tagged back in and they both give Lance a standing suplex. D-Von gives Lance a falling chin breaker but lance knees him in the ribs and tags Val. Val grabs D-Von an arm ringer instead of going to the ribs Al Snow points out. Val works over the arm by bending it behind D-Von’s back and putting his knee into it. Val then locks his foot in and falls back on the arm. Val gets cocky and D-Von clotheslines him, D-Von grabs Val, drags him in the corner and tags in Bubba. Bubba grabs Val and drags him to the mat with a headlock. Val rises to his feet and breaks the hold but misses a clothesline. Bubba gives him a big back suplex. Bubba knocks Storm off the ring apron. Bubba climbs the second rope but a quickly recovered Storm knocks him off and we are in a commercial break.

Whew, so far this has been a solid entertaining match. Hopefully it keeps up. Oh my stars! A new Hellboy trailer hits the television screen. Is this the summer of the fantasy and comic book nerds or what? April 2 is not going to get here soon enough!
What? I said April 2 is not going to get here soon enough. What? April 2 is not going to get here soon enough. What? April 2 is not going to get here soon enough. OKAY!

Oh no, on RAW tomorrow the Rock is going to have a “Mick Foley: This is your life segment.” How does that hype Wrestlemania? Really, am I missing something? What? Am I missing? What? Oh never mind. OKAY!

Back to the match, finally, Lance Storm gives Bubba a beautiful dropkick and tags in Val. Val drapes Bubba over the top rope and then taunts D-Von. D-Von comes in and Lance takes advantage of this distraction by choking Bubba. Val and Storm are acting quite heelish now and that is a good thing. Val slaps Bubba and talks trash. Bubba punches him but Val locks in another headlock. Bubba back suplexes his way out of the hold and both men are on their backs. Lance comes in the ring, diverting referee Chad Patton’s attention. In the other corner, D-Von tags in but paging James Guttman, the referee never saw the tag and did not allow it. Lance is legally tagged in and promptly locks in a chinlock. Bubba elbows his way out of it then tackles Lance Storm. Bubba crawls over and makes the dramatic tag. D-Von is a house of fire sending elbows and clotheslines galore. Lance and D-Von are the legal men since we are keeping score. D-Von clotheslines Lance and Bubba bodyslams Val. D-Von climbs the top rope and headbutts Val’s nuts. Bubba is tossed out of the ring and D-Von is held in the ropes by Val. Lance sees this and goes for the big kick but of course he misses and hits Val. Storm, though, recovers and locks in the Canadian Maple Leaf. Bubba tries to interfere but Val tosses him in to the ringside steps. Val synchs in the move and D-Von looks like he is on the verge of tapping. Lance tags in Val. Val locks in a sleeper hold when Bubba climbs the ring apron. Lance sees this and darts across the ring to knock him off but Bubba is one step ahead and he pulls the ring rope down. Lance spills to the floor causing Val to let go of D-Von who slips behind him. Val steps forward to check the damage allowing D-Von time to recover and the crowd to rise to its feet and yell “Three!” Bubba runs off the ropes and D-Von holds Val who encounters the most devastating tag-team finisher of all time. Val may be able to go all night long but on this occasion he goes down for the three count.

Match Satisfaction: I could have done without the two and a half minute commercial break in the middle of a solid tag-team match but outside of that complaint I liked this match a lot. It is indicative of what a quality tag-team encounter can bring to any wrestling card whether it be on television, pay-per-view or house shows. The crowd seemed to be into the action from moment one and popped big for 3-D. Now, if there were a reason, character or storyline that the audience or I should care about this final qualifying match for the Wrestlemania tag-team turmoil match, I would praise it a little higher.

End Points: Over all, this was a decent edition of HEAT, although it was heavy on the recaps this week. The recaps were no more numerous than usual but they were definitely allowed a longer running time. The opening match-up was a bit of fun primarily because I like Renee Dupree. He provides a good bit of comedy when he dances and having male cheerleader Rob Conway at ringside cheering his every move spices his act up a bit. The final tag match is indicative of the WWE’s gradual new approach of having one stellar or above average main event per show. It works last week and it worked again this week. Hopefully, this will continue for quite sometime.

Jeremy Maes welcomes any comments, oversights and opinions you have to share. Drop me a line at jeremymaes@yahoo.com or if you are a VIP Member, as you should be by now, I can be reached at Jmaes through the messenger service! If you send me an e-mail please include something in the title of the e-mail saying what you are writing about. With so many viruses and worms floating around I delete anything I do not recognize. Also, my Lounge articles are posted sometime every Wednesday. Make sure and check it out. Until this Wednesday, have fun!

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