"Lucha Libre USA Masked Warriors" TV report
August 28, 2010
Aired in MTV
Report by Larry Zarcoff, PWTorch contributor

It's the Season Finale of Masked Warriors!

Wherein new luchadors Mentillo and Azteka duel in the six-sided ring, R.J. Brewer faces Mascara Pupura for the final spot in the Heavyweight Championship Tournament, and an unusual "Trios" match featuring the in-ring debut of Carlito. He's joined by the Puerto Rican Powers to square off against the rudo team of Tinieblas Jr., El Oriental, and Neutronic.

Plus we discover the identity of R.J. Brewer's female friend, and delve further into Rebecca Reyes' back story.

Begin rant.

When I was but a young pup working at ABC in their On-Air promotion division, one of the first things we learned was, "when a show is moving timeslots, even for a week, promote it as if it were the most special opportunity for viewers in the world."

Lucha USA "Masked Warriors" inexplicably was moved to Saturday at noon over the weekend, with no advance warning and no promotion on air. Regular viewers who tuned in Friday night for wrestling were treated to a quick promo for Carlito appearing in the trios match, and then MTV2 aired back-to-back episodes of "The Dudesons."

If MTV2 wants this show to be a success, and I hope they do, they need to get organized and promote their shows properly.

End of rant.

We are treated to a recap of the R.J. Brewer angle and the mysterious blond woman from last week's show.

We are treated to a muffled sounding V.O. highlighting Las Vegas, and it's revealed the announcer is hitherto unknown Masked Warrior "Mentillo," his mask looking like a pistachio nut with skull teeth. He finishes his Vegas travelogue by pick-pocketing a mark on the street. Ironic?

Okay this is weird. Lalo narrates over a hot crowd and welcome us to the SEASON FINALE of "Masked Warriors." Huh? It's the season finale? If they knew this in advance why wouldn't they air it at it's normal time and promote it? Will it even be back? Wow...talk about a swerve.

Tonight we'll find out who takes the last slot on the USA Heavyweight Championship tournament with a match against luchador Mascara Pupura Vs. anti-immigration enthusiast R.J. Brewer.

Apparently R.J.'s mysterious helper, the blond who interfered in his match, is named Brook Carter. We'll see a commercial for her DVD later.

Then we hear about the trios match with the Puerto Rican Powers teaming up with Carlitos vs. Tinieblas Jr, Neutronic and El Oriental. It's official - the graphic displays an "s" at the end of Carlito. So, Carlitos it is... At least one mystery is cleared up.

We begin with our first match, and entering is Mentillo - the guy from the cold open. His mask has changed from pistachio colored to Brazil nut...you could make a pie with this guy. He is a rudo. His opponent is Azteko, who will be our technico. They are both promoted as newcomers to the promotion.

1 -- MENTILLO vs. AZTEKO

Azteko does a hip-wiggle dance, like a snake shedding skin. After a lockup Mentillo takes control. Some stomps on the mat, and Azteco finally fights back. Mentillo reverses an Irish whip and fails in a pin attempt. Azteko takes charge, and shoots Mentillo out to the floor. With a bounce off the ropes, Azteko sails out of the ring and onto Mentillo. Azteko does a little dancing for the crowd, as Mentillo has to wonder if this is karma comeuppance for being a thief in the cold open...

Both men are back in the ring, and Mentillo gets his heat back. Mentillo works some kicks and takes Azteko down with a boot to the head. The action moves to the floor with Mentillo in charge. After taking a moment to heel on some women and children at ringside (nothing horrible), Mentillo tosses Azteko back into the ring and goes to work.

As the action slows down Mentillo puts Azteko upside down in the ropes. The announcers wisely use the lull to promote the trios match later in the card. As Mentillo distracts the referee he repeatedly mule-kicks his inverted opponent in the head. In the context of the show this is cool, because the heel is cheating, giving us a reason to dislike him. Haven't seen a lot of that.

Mentillo tries a baseball slide through the ref's legs and puts together a pin attempt. Only two. Then Mentillo tries a second-rope moonsault combination for another two count. Azteko fights back with a spin-kick to the head, but Mentillo stays on offense, hitting an interesting version of a northern lights suplex for another two-count.

Punches traded in the middle of the ring, and Azteko goes back on offense. Azteko dances in the ring. Mentillo tries a whip off the rope, but Azteko takes him down with a head-scissors. Mentillo is struggling in the ropes, and Azteko hits the "619."

Azteko to the top rope and leaps, but Mentillo catches him the air with a boot. Now goes to the top rope and hit's the "Identity Theft," which basically jumping off the top and stomping on your opponent's sternum. Mentillo gets the pin with a rollup.

WINNER: Mentillo via three count.

Lizmark Jr. enters the ring unexpectedly, and powerslams Azteko. Poor Azteko - he went from "Dancing with the Stars" to seeing them...

[COMMERCIAL BREAK #1]

We're back and Lizmark Jr. is on the mike calling out Marco Corleone in English. Marco comes out from the back, enters the ring, and is jumped by Rellik. Double team on Marco, and the heels administer their beat down. Super Nova comes out of the back, and hits the rudos with a double kick off the top rope. The Rudos high tail it out of the ring, as Super Nova consoles Marco Corlene.

Rebecca Reyes has joined Nigel and Lalo on commentary and says, "I don't know what just happened."

That makes two of us.

We have a recap of the Heavyweight Title Brackets, with Marco Corleone vs. our popular "?," and Charly Malice vs. Lizmark Jr. The winner of tonight's R.J. Brewer-Mascara Pupura match will be Corleone's opponent. Which is to say R.J. Brewer will win.

We now go to the video package promised in the opening segment, of R.J. Brewer's accomplice Brooke Carter promoting her DVD. Pretty badly done, I think they're intimating that the DVD is a four-hour sex tape that's too hot for TV. Lots of "bleeping" and blurring of images. We learn Brook is R.J.'s girlfriend, the daughter of an oil tycoon, and totally aligned with R.J. politically.

Brooke Carter's on-camera acting skills are suitable for radio.

[COMMERCIAL BREAK #2]

We're back as R.J. Brewer enters with Brooke Carter. Not much crowd response - but that could be an audio thing. They heel to the crowd a bit. Next Mascara Pupura makes his entrance. A generic technico, we just don't know anything about him. Seems he's simply another Hispanic to annoy Brewer.

2 -- R.J. BREWER (w/Brooke Carter) vs. MASCARA PUPURA

Brooke heads to the outside. R.J. tries to go on offense but Pupura slickly fights him off with some flips. Brewer is consoled Brooke as Pupura plays to the audience. Lalo comments that Brewer and Brooke are more powerful than Brad and Angelina, and could rule the country. Rebecca counters with, "That's a scary thought."

Pupura with some more well-executed offense. This guy is really good - they should give him a back story. Pupura with a pin attempt and gets only two. Brewer reverses Pupura and hits him with a suplex and quick cover for one.

Brewer on offense and hits Pupura with a knee to the midsection, and Pupura sells it like a gall-bladder operation. Now the announcers are dogging Rebecca off-camera about her night with Pacqueno Halloween. They say that she should be embarrassed as she's a married woman. She doesn't want to get into it. The cue up some candid photos that show a clearly unconscious Rebecca in face-paint, in the arms of Pacqueno Halloween, and surrounded by Rudos.

Back to the action in the ring, Brook is hitting Pupura from the outside as Brewer distracts the ref. Brewer with a cover for only two. Brewer remains on offense and gets another two count. Pupura hits a quick head scissor take-down but Brewer remains in control, locking in the sharpshooter. Pupura makes it to the ropes and the hold is broken.

Pupura implores the crowd to cheer for him.

Crickets.

The action has really slowed down as Brewer stalked confidently around the ring. Brewer hits a head butt. Pupura reverses Brewer and sends him to the floor. Pupura with a flip over the top rope onto Brewer and both men are down.

Brooke consoles Brewer as Purpura tries to get the audience to care.

Tumbleweeds.

Pupura tries to hit a sunset flip and pin from the outside, but Brewer reverses it and lands in a mount position, grabs the ropes for leverage, and assisted by Brook gets the three-count on Pupura. This is another clear example of the heel cheating to win. Good.

WINNER: R.J. Brewer with the three count. So, the final four for the Heavyweight tournament are set. R.J. Brewer will face Marco Corleone in the semi-finals, with Charly Malice and Lizmark Jr in the other semi.

[COMMERCIAL BREAK #3]

We're back with Rebecca backstage with Carlitos, who has been to Supercuts. Carlito with a basic techico promo, saying that he and the Puerto Rican Powers are teaming up to tech the rudo trio the meaning of respect. He dogs Rebecca about being married and then exits stage right.

Now we get a confusing backstage segment that seems to imply that the rudo from the curtain-jerker, Mentillo, is somehow using computer trading to steal Lugo Esquire's money. I guess this sets up a feud between them.

[COMMERCIAL BREAK #4]

We have a commercial for a Lucha video game hitting stores on October 10. They showed a AAA ring, so this may just be a commercial that's unaffiliated with "Masked Warriors."

We're back with Rebecca backstage crying on Mascarita Dorada's shoulder about her encounter with Pacquino Halloween. Halloween bursts in and tells Rebecca his mom wants grandchildren. Dorada gets in Pacqueno's face, and we viewers get to READ THE ARGUMENT in subtitles. Ugh. They even type things like, "What's your dealio?" and "I'm dunzo with this." It's like reading with Ricky Ricardo. Pacqueno tosses Dorada off camera, snaps at Rebecca and exits stage left.

Then we are treated to a fan-made video recapping the Puerto Rican Powers by "Lucas," from Missouri. Lucas is narrating and the video is just awful. I highly doubt this is a legit fan video, but it's shot off of monitors and supposedly captures that "YouTube" feeling. I think that YouTube type recaps from fans are a great idea but this was really poorly executed. Lucas sounds like a bad voice over audition tape from a guy who really wants to do animation...

And now it's time for our Main Event. Rudos El Oriental, Neutronic, and Tinieblas Jr. (team captain) make their entrances. I have to say it again - Tinieblas Jr has the best costume and mask in the promotion. Tinieblas Jr. plays to the crows like a technico, even though he's a rudo.

The Puerto Rican Powers are in next, high-fiving the crowd, and are followed by Carlitos (team captain). Signing and autograph on the way to the ring, Carlitos is being portrayed as a strong technico. The crowd noise is really flat, but it seemed that some folks recognized him and he was greeted hungrily by fans at ringside.

Now sharp-eared listeners will notice that Carlitos's entrance song, at least today, is the theme from Monday Night Raw, "Burn it to the Ground." Eep. That's kind of weird...

[COMMERCIAL BREAK #5]

3 -- CARLITOS & PUERTO RICAN POWERS vs. EL ORIENTAL & TINIEBLAS, JR. & NEUTRONIC -- Trios tag match

We're back and it's time for trios. San Juan kid opens up against Neutronic, and San Juan Kid gets the advantage, doing the "surfer pose" for the kids in the audience. Back and forth action in the ring with Neutronic tagging in El Oriental. San Juan kid is sent to the floor.

PR Flyer enters and misses a dropkick. El Oriental on offense, and tries for a quick pin. Barely a one count. PR Flyer flips him over for a quick pin. Also a one count. More fairly even action until PR Flyer hits a spinning heel kick sending El Oriental to the floor with little birdies circling his head. PR Flyer flips over the top onto El Oriental and poses on the outside.

Carlitos enters the ring facing off against Tinieblas Jr. In "Trios" matches I don't think folks have to tag in. Carlitos and Tinieblas Jr. trade chops.

"Lamb chop, Tinieblas Jr."
"Thank you, Carlitos. Pork chop?"
"Yes, thank you."

Tinieblas Jr. takes Carlitos down by the hair and gets a two count. Carlitos is up with a big boot to Tinieblas Jr. and gets a two count. Carlitos hits a springboard elbow, which takes Tinieblas down. As Carlitos poses, the remaining rudos hit the ring for a triple team. Do we know who's going over tonight?

That. Will. Be. Cool.

Carlitos is out onto the floor and San Juan Kid is in. The rudos triple team him too. San Juan kid fights off the ropes into a "double flapjack," and then his legs are wishboned by the rudos...

"What did you wish for, Neutronic?"
"Peace on earth. You Tineiblas?"
"For El Oriental to get a back story."

San Juan Kid rolls out onto the floor and now it's PR Flyer's turn to be beaten down. El Oriental with a poke to the eye, and then the rudos hit a triple "Face cruncher."

Carlitos has seen enough, however, hits the ring and cleans house. The rudos recover and beat Carlitos into the corner. El Oriental and Neutronic whip Tinieblas Jr. into Carlito and bail to the outside. They grab Carlitos legs, yank, and crotch him against the turnbuckle. In a bit of comedy, Carlitos genuflects due to the pain.

More triple teaming on Carlitos, who's gripping his Colon-es. Carlitos is set up by the Rudos, but ducks Neutronic who tumbles to the outside and double clotheslines El Oriental and Tinieblas Jr. Carlitos powers up.

Now the Puerto Rican Powers are in with double missile drop kicks, and all the rudos are on the floor. The Puerto Rican Powers set up on the turnbuckles and hit synchronized springboard corkscrew moonsaults onto Neutronic and El Oriental. There's a highlight for your next YouTube video, Lucas...

Carlitos is in the ring with Tinieblas Jr, Back and forth action, and Tinieblas Jr. takes control. He hits an abdominal stretch rest hold and Carlitos won't submit. Neutronic sneaks in the ring. Carlitos reverses Tinieblas Jr., and boots Neutronic back to the floor, and sends Tinieblas Jr. to the outside.

El Oriental is in and hits some quick kicks. Carlitos is down and to the outside.

San Juan Kid hits the ring, and gets put in a pile-driver position by El Oriental, and then takes a brutal inverted death valley driver to the mat. El Oriental covers and gets a long two count. El Oriental with his version of rolling thunder, and then he sets up the "Yakuza," which is a modified bow and arrow submission hold.

PR Flyer with a splash to break up the hold. Neutronic is now working with PR Flyer. Neutronic sets up PR Flyer against the ropes and does a really nifty run up the turnbuckles and a backwards splash and gets the first pin. He and PR Flyer roll out.

WINNER OF FIRST FALL: NEUTRONIC (w/Tinieblas Jr. and El Oriental)

The action continues with San Juan Kid missing another drop kick on El Oriental. Oriental stalls, and San Juan Kid gets up and hits him with and enzuguri, sending him to the floor. San Juan Kid then flips over the top rope and both he and El Oriental are down on the outside.

Carlitos is in the ring working with Tinieblas Jr. Tinieblas hits a head scissors and Carlitos no-sells it. Carlitos hits Tinieblas with his version of the Code Breaker, called a "Back Snapper," and San Juan Kid hits a 450 splash for the pin.

WINNER SECOND FALL AND THE MATCH: The San Juan Kid (with Carlitos and PR Flyer)

Wait I know. That makes no sense.

Nigel comes on the mic and explains that if you pin the captain of the other team, you automatically win the match.

Ah...Another mystery explained.

Now, Nigel tackles the final mystery. He thanks us for watching the season one finale, and invites us to log onto luchalibreusa.com for exclusive content and information about the season two premiere date.

And we are out.

So what they ended up doing was a basic TV cliffhanger. We have our brackets for semi-finals, and we will have to wait for season two to crown our champions.

Depending on when the show airs I may or may not be able to continue to report on the shows. If it works out you'll hear from me in Season 2. If not, thank you for taking the time to read these recaps and reviews!

We suggest these recent related articles...

PARKS'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 10/8: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of Thursday show, including Roman Reigns & Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt & Braun Strowman

METZGER'S ROH TV REPORT 10/4 & 10/7: IWGP World champ Okada vs. Roderick Strong main event, plus Briscoes vs. Time Splitters, more from "Field of Honor," Overall Reax

MCMAHON'S TNA IMPACT REPORT 10/7: TNA Title Series kicks off, Bound for Glory fall-out, more; Overall Reax