By James Caldwell, Torch assistant editor

WWE Superstars TV Report
June 4, 2009 - Week 8
Taped the Week of June 1

After the WWE Superstars video montage started the broadcast, Raw announcers Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler welcomed us to the show. Cue up Goldust's theme music and the Oddities v.2 of Goldust & Hornswoggle came to the ring. Lawler tried to figure out whether he or Cole was Goldust. The Brian Kendrick and Jamie Noble then came out as the opposition.

1 -- GOLDUST & HORNSWOGGLE vs. THE BRIAN KENDRICK & JAMIE NOBLE

Before the bell, Hornswoggle grabbed Kendrick's jacket and ran around ringside with it on. Lawler equated Kendrick to a little person, saying Kendrick was more upset that it fit Hornswoggle rather than him actually stealing it. Goldust towered over everyone in here. Hornswoggle took a tag to work on Kendrick, who cut him off then did the "stop slapping yourself" thing eight year-olds kids do to each other. Goldust took a hot tag at 3:00 and whipped Kendrick around the ring. Goldust then suplexed Noble over the top rope to the floor and Hornswoggle ran off the apron with a cannonball dive onto Noble. Kendrick tried to nail Goldust with Sliced Bread, but Goldust escaped and hit a facebuster. Horny then took a tag and nailed the Tadpole Splash on Kendrick, who quietly and quickly pulled Hornswoggle onto him after Horny overshot the finish. Horny with the pin for the win.

WINNERS: Hornswoggle & Goldust in 4:00. Well, the crowd sounded reasonably excited for the action. Kendrick and Noble were virtually turned into midgets, which won't help them build any credibility to be viable threats as heels. Good news is they're on TV and creative has something for them right now. (*)

Extreme Rules plug: Cole hyped John Cena vs. Big Show in the Submissions match. Cole said Cena is going to need a miracle to beat Show. Stack the deck. Overcome the odds. SuperCena.

[Commercial Break]

Announcers: ECW champion Christian joined ECW announcers Josh Mathews and Matt Striker to call ECW's "contribution" to this week's Superstars show. Cue up the Bret Hart re-mix for the Hart Dynasty to come out for D.H. Smith's match. Tommy Dreamer then came out to face him.

[Q2]

2 -- TOMMY DREAMER vs. D.H. SMITH (w/Hart Dynasty - Tyson Kidd and Natalya)

Christian said he didn't appreciate Dreamer dropping him on his head at the end of ECW on Tuesday. He said Dreamer is obviously feeling the pressure and he brought this "quest" on himself, so he's lashing out against him with the sand running out of the hour glass. Dreamer held control in the first two minutes, then Smith went to the floor to recover, only to have Dreamer dropkick him to the floor in front of the announce desk. Smith rammed Dreamer into the ring apron, then Smith and Kidd approached Christian, who asked them what their problem is. Dreamer took advantage by nailing a clothesline on the floor. Cut to break.

[Commercial Break]

Striker wanted to get to the bottom of the issue with Christian "cheating" to beat Jack Swagger the last two times they faced each other. Christian said Striker might call it cheating, but he calls it savvy. Christian said Swagger shows up and sees ropes and canvas, but he sees a chessboard and he's always moving, adjusting, changing on the fly. Christian said he gets the vibe that some people want to see Dreamer win on Sunday, but probably only because they don't want to hear him cry through another farewell interview. Zing!

Back to the action where Smith was in control working over Dreamer on the chessboard. Smith went up top, but missed with a dive and Dreamer began his comeback. Dreamer then applied a Texas Cloverleaf center ring. Dynasty tried to run interference, but Christian yanked a chair away from Natalya. In that confusion, Kidd smashed Dreamer with a boot and that was apparently enough for Smith to make the cover for the win. Post-match: Christian surveyed the damage, which he inadvertently created. Dreamer recovered on the mat, then glared to the floor where Christian was holding his ECW Title belt.

WINNER: Smith in 9:00. Christian was great on commentary. He was 1,000 percent better than those infamous guest commentary moments in TNA when he was the babyface NWA World champion and would say absolutely nothing. Match was okay. Build-up to Christian vs. Dreamer vs. Swagger on Sunday was solid. Nice follow-up on ECW. (*1/4)

[Commercial Break]

[Q3]

Announcers: Smackdown announcers Jim Ross and Todd Grisham were ringside to spend half-an-hour on the Smackdown brand. But, first, they plugged the Extreme Rules PPV card.

Video package: They aired a video on the feud between World Hvt. champion Edge and Jeff Hardy leading to their ladder match on Sunday. ... Back to Ross and Grisham talking about the match being a "career threatening environment." They broke down the rest of the PPV card.

In-ring: Chris Jericho came to the ring for the TV main event. Before wrestling, though, Jericho pulled out Michael Cole's ringside thesaurus to tell the audience they're leeches and parasites. He then addressed Rey Mysterio, saying Rey is nothing more than the ultimate hypocrite. Jericho said he embarrassed Rey and his mission on Sunday is tearing the mask off Rey to expose his hypocritical face to the entire world. After that, he will vanquish him and become IC champion for the ninth time. He polled the crowd on whether they understand the words coming out of his mouth. Crowd answered with boos. Main event up next.

[Commercial Break]

In-ring: Dolph Ziggler came out as Jericho's partner. Ziggler extended his hand for a shake and introduced himself, but Jericho wanted nothing to do with the Curt Hennig parasite. R-Truth's music interrupted the Stare Down and Truth rapped his way through the crowd to ringside asking "what's up?" Truth took a good amount of time to enter the ringside area to streeeeetch pre-match intros, then Jeff Hardy came out to a rockstar reception. Hardy was painted very silver tonight. Hardy and Truth then talked strategy before the bell sounded.

[Q4]

3 -- JEFF HARDY & R-TRUTH vs. CHRIS JERICHO & DOLPH ZIGGLER

Grisham gave us some info that Truth told him before the show it's a dream come true to team with Hardy since both of them are from North Carolina. Jericho told Dolph to start things off and Dolph took Jeff to the floor where he ran distraction, allowing Jericho to yank Jeff off the apron into the side of the ring. Dolph took advantage by going back to work on Jeff in the ring. Jeff escaped at 3:00 and tagged out to Truth, who showed off his trademark high-flying offense. Nice sequence, then Jeff tagged in and nailed Jericho with the Whisper in the Wind. Truth re-entered to set up Jeff for the run-off-the-back leg whip in the corner. Dolph then surprised Truth from behind with a dropkick that allowed Jericho to take control. Cut to break.

[Commercial Break]

Crowd was hot back from break with Truth fighting back against Ziggler, but then he ran into a clothesline from DZ. Jericho tagged in and vehemently demanded to know, "What's up, Truth?" He told him what's up: a slap to the face. Jericho followed with an enziguiri kick and ref Armstrong was a bit slow on his cadence counting a pin, so Jericho let him know about it. Dolph and Jericho exchange tags a few more times, then Hardy took a hot tag at 11:00 and scored a nearfall on Ziggler. Hardy then hit Ziggler with the Whisper in the Wind, but Jericho broke up the pin. Truth clotheslined Jericho to the floor, then flew to the outside with a big dive to take out Jericho. Back in the ring, Hardy dropped Ziggler with the Twist of Fate. Hardy then went up top and nailed the Swanton Bomb for the pin and the win as the crowd was on the verge of exploding.

Afterward, Truth and Hardy celebrated the victory while trying not to smear Hardy's body paint. Very key. Ross asked Hardy whether he can climb the ladder and retrieve the World Title on Sunday against Edge. Grisham plugged tomorrow night's Smackdown as Hardy and Truth closed the show celebrating.

WINNERS: Hardy & Truth in 12:00. Very exciting match to conclude the show. The combo of two established main eventers with two mid-carders looking for noteworthy TV exposure made for a good dynamic. Crowd was hot no matter what combination was in the ring and the finishing sequence played out nicely to set up Hardy vs. Edge at the PPV. Well done. (***)

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