by Greg Parks, PWTorch.com Contributor

WWE Smackdown review
May 29, 2009
Taped 5/26/09 in Los Angeles, Calif.
Aired on MyNetwork TV


-WWE Open.

-They went right to the arena, where Rey Mysterio came to the ring. As he interacted with the fans on his way to the squared circle, Jim Ross plugged the main event tag match of Rey & Jeff Hardy vs. Edge & Chris Jericho. Rey spoke some Spanish, which the crowded reacted to. He talked about his No Holds Barred match against Jericho at Extreme Rules. Mysterio said in a match like that, he can hit Jericho with any move he wants. He said he’d do anything to shut Jericho up once and for all. As he began to speak in Spanish again, Jericho’s music interrupted and the well-dressed man came to the ring.

Y2J disputed Mysterio’s claim that their No Holds Barred match will be “off the hook.” Jericho asked if it’d be “off the hook” if he bashed Rey’s brains in with a chair or slammed the I.C Title against his head. Jericho began to sort-of wander with his words until Rey told him to shut up. Rey reminded Jericho of the last time he gave his word about Rey not hitting the 619, yet he did. Mysterio even mentioned Mickey Rourke knocking Jericho out at Wrestlemania. Then they showed Rourke sitting at ringside, smiling at that remark. Rey called Jericho’s word “worthless.” Jericho said he wasn’t going to pander to Mickey Rourke. He stared Rourke down as Mickey waved him over. Jericho said he was too much of a professional to walk over and punch the Mick-ster in his face. Jericho said he’s too much of a professional and Rourke is too worthless. Jericho also called the dream world that Rey and his fans live in “worthless.” He then made reference to Rey hiding behind a mask, saying people with integrity and honor don’t hide their faces from the world- only criminals, cowards and people with dirty, little secrets. Jericho asked what Rey was hiding. Y2J said he’d find out because he’d tear that mask off and expose Rey for what he is. He said the mask will be Rey’s downfall. He then tried to sucker-punch Rey, but Rey dodged it. He knocked Jericho into the ropes, but Y2J moved before Rey could hit the 619. Good segment, but not quite on par with Jericho’s best mic work.

-Up next: Great Khali & R-Truth against Dolph Ziggler and Mike Knox. That’s a unique match-up. They showed Khali and Ranjin Singh walking backstage.

[Commercial Break]

1- R-TRTH & THE GREAT KHALI vs. MIKE KNOX & DOLPH ZIGGLER

Truth rapped his way to the ring with Khali and Singh. Khali even gave a few “what’s up!” shouts. Then all three of them danced in the ring. Quite a sight indeed. Truth started the match against Ziggler. Nice roll-up by Truth for two, then a hip-toss. He’s got extra springs in his boots tonight. As soon as Khali tagged in, Ziggler tagged out. Big boot from Khali. That was the extent of his involvement, as he tagged back out. Truth got caught with a big clothesline. JR mentioned that Ziggler graduated from Kent State with a pre-law degree. Ziggler and Truth collided in mid-air as they both went for a cross-body 3:00 into the match. Both men made tags and Khali got the best of Knox. Ziggler tried to fly off the top rope, but Khali caught him by the throat. This allowed Knox to try to get the upper-hand. It was unsuccessful. After a back-kick by Khali, they showed Ziggler leaving the ringside area. Khali Bomb on Knox and it was academic from there.

WINNERS: Khali & Truth, at 4:07. Khali has become almost watchable in the ring. Combine that with Truth’s abilities and it made for a decent little match.

-They plugged the main event tag match again.

-More dancing from the faces in the ring.

-Melina was walking backstage. She’s facing Alicia Fox next.

[Commercial Break]

2- MELINA vs. ALICIA FOX

Fox was accompanied by Michelle McCool. She also has music that sounds like part of the opening of Nelly’s “Hot in Here.” Melina did the Matrix to avoid a clothesline, then kicked Fox from that position. McCool provided some distraction on the outside, allowing Fox to kick Melina hard through the ropes. Back-breaker by the former wedding planner and that got a one-count. Melina used her flexibility again to get the best of Alicia. Side-kick to the mid-section got two. McCool got on the apron and allowed Fox to knock Melina off the top rope. Melina though for some reason didn’t really sell it much and went back on offense, finishing off Fox with her split-legged neck-breaker.

WINNER: Melina, at 2:32.

McCool gave Melina her belt after the match, staring at her menacingly while doing it.

-Josh Mathews was backstage with John Morrison. He asked Morrison about his match with Umaga later tonight. Morrison said Umaga wasn’t smart and that he’d use his brain to beat Umaga tonight. Shelton Benjamin interrupted and said if he survives Umaga tonight, they have some unfinished business “in the real world.” Morrison said he has beaten Shelton twice and “the other half of the World’s Most Forgotten Tag Team” twice. Morrison said he had better things to do than talk to a former champ.

-Jeff Hardy was walking backstage....we’ll hear from him next.

[Commercial Break]

-Todd Grisham sent it to a video package of Jeff Hardy’s previous ladder experiences.

-Hardy then came out to the ring. He said that some people think he’s crazy to choose a ladder match, but they’re his comfort zone. Hardy said he and Edge were a part of the first ever tag-team ladder match, and their careers changed after that night. And now, their feud will end after a ladder match. Hardy said he’ll climb the ladder and become World Champion at Extreme Rules. That was it. I can’t tell if WWE still isn’t confident in Hardy’s mic skills or if they’re making this part of his character, a man of few words if you will.

As he was leaving the ring and heading up the ramp, Umaga came out for his match. Hardy side-tracked Umaga and continued heading to the back. I remember back in the day when feuds were started when a wrestler was heading to the back and another was coming to the ring. They’d bump into each other and start yelling and fighting. Those were the days.

[Commercial Break]

3- UMAGA vs. JOHN MORRISON

Umaga used his strength to his advantage early on. He missed a charge in the corner, but came back to shoulderblock Morrison down. Back-and-forth in the first minute or two, as Morrison low-bridged Umaga to the outside. Springboard cross-body by Morrison found the mark. Back in the ring, a sunset flip attempt failed, but Umaga also whiffed on a sit-down splash. Just as Morrison got momentum, he was thrown in the air and came down in a Samoan drop. Morrison rolled out of the ring as the show went to break.

[Commercial Break]

Umaga had Morrison in a rest-hold back from break. It seems like that’s the new thing now, like going out of the ring was a signal to go to break, lots of times when they come back I feel like the guys are sitting in a hold. Umaga hung Morrison out gut-first on the top rope, then superkicked him to ringside. Morrison tried to get back on offense in the ring, but Umaga turned him inside-out on a clothesline. Nerve-hold applied by Umaga. Crowd got a little into it, but not completely. Morrison came back with a Pele kick (as called by JR), but was side-slammed down by the former Three Minute Warning member. Another nerve hold, working the left arm as well and the crowd seemed to get restless. Morrison countered another side slam with a DDT. Cover got two. Morrison started to come on, but a thrust to the throat sent Morrison back down. To the outside, Umaga grabbed the strap and hit Morrison with it, drawing a DQ.

WINNER: Morrison, by DQ, at 12:57. Solid match, despite the rest-holds. They were kept relatively short and the action outside of them was very good.

Umaga continued to use the strap against Morrison, and even hung him upside down in the corner. This brought out CM Punk, who took it to Umaga, including hitting a briefcase shot on him. Grisham got in the ring and asked Punk his strategy for Extreme Rules. Punk said he’s not a strategy-type guy and he’s never been in a strap match. Punk said he’s done everything people said he couldn’t do, and now they’re saying he can’t drag Umaga around and touch all four corners. He said Umaga is big and strong but there’s one thing he’s not: CM Punk.

[Commercial Break]
-Grisham thanked the Sick Puppies for providing the theme song for Extreme Rules.

4- CRYME TYME vs. SHELTON BENJAMIN & CHARLIE HAAS

This match is taking place because of the situation that occurred on last night’s WWE Superstars program, where a Cryme Tyme distraction allowed the Colons to beat Haas & Shelton. Haas showed good aggressiveness in pounding away at JTG on the mat. Haas tried to fight out of the corner as JTG laid in the shoulders. Shad came in, but Haas got his feet up on a charge attempt by Gaspard. Benjamin applied a waist-lock to Shad but couldn’t do anything with it. Flying shoulder tackle by Shad. The heels were able to do some double-teaming when the ref was occupied with Shad in the opposite corner. JTG was in a bad way as they went to break.

[Commercial Break]

Haas was working on keeping JTG away from his corner upon return. What’s the deal with the faces in tag matches always being in the top left of the TV screen, and the heels always being in the bottom right corner? Shelton came in and kept up the attack on JTG. Charlie was yelling “let me have some!” from the corner so Shelton did make the tag. He slapped JTG in the head, telling him he cost them their match last night. JTG came back with some right hands, but that didn’t last long. JTG fought out of a neutral corner, then dodged a splash attempt. German suplex by Benjamin and JTG finally came back against Haas. Both men were down at the 10:00 mark. They were able to make tags and Shad cleaned house. The fans weren’t as in to Cryme Tyme as I expected. JTG took out Haas but Shelton hit Paydirt on Shad for the win.

WINNERS: Benjamin & Haas, at 11:31. Another above-average tag match. There will be three on the show, counting the main event. That’s odd for a company that doesn’t like tag teams.

-A video package recapped the Layla-Eve Torres feud. They square off in singles competition next.

[Commercial Break]

5- EVE TORRES vs. LAYLA

JR mentioned that this match has NBA ties: Eve was a dancer for the LA Clippers and of course, Layla was on the dance team for the Miami Heat. According to JR, she even has a championship ring from the 2006 season. The girls rolled around on the mat pulling each others hair, and they even rolled to ringside. Layla slammed Eve’s back against the apron. She continued to work on Eve’s back and an early cover got two. Hair toss by Layla, then she stretched out Eve’s arms and back. Dropkick to the back this time and another two-count. Both ladies went face-first on the mat, grabbing each other’s hair. Eve fought back with forearms and landed a few clotheslines. Dropkick on Layla and a sunset flip got two. Cross-body by Layla, but Eve rolled through and picked up the victory.

WINNER: Eve, at 3:11. Not quite bowling-shoe ugly, but close. But they are gorgeous, so that made it a little more palatable.

-Jericho and Edge met backstage and Edge suggested Jericho follow his lead. Jericho retorted that it didn’t work out well for him last week. Y2J said he doesn’t have to listen to what anyone has to say. Jericho then said he was done and wouldn’t participate in the match. He walked away as Edge appeared to realize what was happening.

[Commercial Break]

-Edge came out and got on the mic. He said Jeff Hardy is all about wasted opportunity. He talked about Jeff picking a Ladder Match last week, a match Edge owns. Edge said no matter what, he always wins. He said the difference between ladder matches of the past and this one is that this one is their first-ever one-on-one Ladder Match for the World Championship. He said he’d still walk out of Extreme Rules as the champion.

6- EDGE & CHRIS JERICHO vs. REY MYSTERIO & JEFF HARDY

Jericho didn’t come out when he was announced, but I’m assuming he can join the match at any time. On his way to the ring, Rey got attacked by one of the fans he bumped heads with in the crowd, and who was wearing a Rey mask and a t-shirt. He hopped over the railing and it was revealed to be Jericho. He tried to un-mask Rey, but Jeff Hardy ran down just in time to make the save. He checked on along with refs and medics as the show went to break.

[Commercial Break]

-They showed a replay of the attack on Rey Mysterio.

6- EDGE & CHRIS JERICHO vs. JEFF HARDY- HANDICAP MATCH

Ring announcer Justin Roberts said Hardy agreed to the contest as a handicap match. Hardy tried to put Jericho away early, using some of his signature moves and he went for a Swanton under a minute in. Edge caused a distraction and Jeff hit him instead with a double axe-handle. Hardy propelled himself to Edge on the outside. Jericho, the legal man, took out Hardy before he could get back into the ring. Jericho dropped a knee on Hardy’s head back in the ring and proclaimed “that’s it!” It was not. Y2J tagged Edge in and he got a kick to the gut on Hardy. I guess they figure we’ve seen Hardy vs. Edge so much in the past, it wouldn’t hurt to give away some more in-ring action between the two in the weeks leading up to Extreme Rules. Tag in to Jericho, who taunted Hardy, and Jeff tried to come back. Didn’t work, but he did get his knees up on a Lionsault attempt. Edge came in but Jeff corralled him with a clothesline. Mule kick landed right in Edge’s chest. A set of clotheslines by Jeff and then a corner dropkick. Twist of Fate was no good, but Jeff pushed Edge into Jericho. A roll-up by Hardy got two, then Jericho got illegally involved. Whisper in the Wind took down both men. Twist of Fate (sorta) on Jericho, but Hardy turned around and right into a spear, followed by a pin.

WINNERS: Edge & Jericho, at 7:10.

Edge went under the ring after the match and retrieved a ladder. He rammed the ladder straight into Hardy’s face. Edge then slammed it on Hardy’s body. He took the belt and stood on the ladder, which was on the ground with Hardy laying in between the two sides. Quite the visual there. A replay of the finish of the match and Edge’s ladder-related attack were shown. Medics tended to Hardy as Edge celebrated.

Greg Parks has been covering Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. You can also hear him every-other-week in the post-Raw audio show in the Torch VIP audio section and read his all-new blog in the VIP forum. Check out his column each week in the PDF-exclusive version of the Torch Newsletter. Comments, questions and feedback are welcome, and can be sent to g_man9784@yahoo.com.

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