WWE Velocity review
March 29, 2003
Shown on TNN
By Pete Nyman, Torch Team Contributor

Announcers: Josh Mathews & Ernest Miller.

(1) Funaki beat Jamie Noble (w/Nidia). Lockup to start. Jamie Noble put on a headlock. Both men then put on hammerlocks. Noble hit a hiptoss. Noble then put on a wristlock but Funaki counted with a legscissors choke. Lockup. Funaki put on a waistlock. Noble hit an elbow. Funaki then hit a hiptoss and a drop toe hold. Funaki then followed with a dropkick to the head and pinned Noble for the 2 count. Noble hit a neckbreaker and then some shoulders to the gut. Noble then hit a short arm clothesline and pinned Funaki for the 2 count. Noble then hit a back suplex. Noble pinned Funaki for another 2 count. Noble then put on a headlock and a half Boston crab. Funaki then hit a backslide for a pin and the 2 count. Noble hit a knee to the gut. Funaki then hit an Enzuigiri. Funaki then hit a knife edged chop. Funaki hit a flying forearm but then Noble hit a powerslam and pinned Funaki for the 2 count. Funaki slingshotted Noble into the turnbuckles and then hit a bulldog and pinned Noble for the 2 count. Noble rolled up Funaki for the 2 count but then Funaki rolled up Noble for another 2 count. Funaki hit a sidekick and then an elbow. Noble hit a knife edged chop but Funaki hit a nice tornado DDT and pinned Noble for the 3 count.

A replay of the finish was shown.

[commercial break]

Lugz Boot of the Week: Brock Lesnar getting attacked by Kurt Angle 2 weeks ago on Smackdown.

A video was shown of the feud between Brock Lesnar and Kurt Angle.

Roddy Piper talked about his memories of WrestleMania. Surprisingly, the jerk didn't make any idiotic comments.

[commercial break]

Gene Okerlund talked about WrestleMania.

(2) Bill DeMott beat Apollo Kahn via knockout. Apollo Kahn is from Pro Wrestling Iron. Bill DeMott hit a legsweep and put on a wristlock. DeMott then hit a knife edged chop. Apollo Kahn hit a kick and a punch but the DeMott just hit a hard clothesline on Apollo Kahn. A replay was shown of the clothesline. DeMott hit another hard clothesline and knocked out Apollo Kahn. DeMott then hit a powerbomb.

A video was shown for the Vince McMahon vs. Hulk Hogan match at WrestleMania.

[commercial break]

WWE Slam of the Week: Vince McMahon signing Hulk Hogan's contract in his own blood.

More video of Vince McMahon and Hulk Hogan was shown. I wouldn't be surprised if this was the last match at WrestleMania.

Jimmy Hart talked about his favorite WrestleMania memories.

[commercial break]

More Vince McMahon and Hulk Hogan.

Jesse Ventura talked about his WrestleMania memories.

[commercial break]

WrestleMania Moment: Lawrence Taylor defeating Bam Bam Bigelow at WrestleMania XI. I remember they had the event on pay-per-view, then the next week they showed it for free on Fox.

(3) Johnny Stamboli (w/Nunzio) beat Tajiri. Lockup. Tajiri hit a handspring kick. Tajiri then hit a crossbody to the outside. Tajiri then hit an elbow and a kick to Johnny Stamboli's leg. Tajiri then put on the Tarantula, but Nunzio attacked Tajiri with his jacket. Nunzio then choked Tajiri. Johnny Stamboli pinned Tajiri for the 2 count. Stamboli then choked Tajiri. Nunzio then choked Tajiri. Stamboli hit an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Stamboli pinned Tajiri for the 2 count. Stamboli twisted Tajiri's head. Tajiri hit an enzuigiri. Tajiri then hit some kicks to the ribs. Stamboli hit a tilt-a-whirl slam. Tajiri delivered a dropkick to the face and pinned Stamboli for the 2 count. Tajiri delivered a knife edged chop and a spinning heel kick and pinned Stamboli for the 2 count. Tajiri hit a handspring elbow but then Stamboli hit the Faygetaboutit and pinned Tajiri for the 3 count.

[end show]

Notes: Well, this Velocity report is on a Monday because I wanted to avoid all the WrestleMania hoopla. This Velocity was good, Funaki getting a clean win was nice. Bill DeMott beating up Apollo Kahn was actually pretty funny. That's it, see you next week. Send me feedback at Flexholly@aol.com.

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