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TV REPORTS
CALDWELL'S WWE RAW REPORT 5/11: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of Shane vs. Orton edition

May 11, 2009 - 10:03:19 PM
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By James Caldwell, Torch assistant editor

WWE Raw Live Report
May 11, 2009
Columbus, Ohio


The show started with Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler welcoming us to the show. Lilian Garcia was center ring and she introduced the WWE champion Randy Orton. Out came Orton on stage and he was flanked by Ted DiBiase on his left and Cody Rhodes on his right. Orton and Co. simply stood on stage without entering the ring. Orton began his promo...

Orton said the McMahons pride themselves on listening to the audience, but what they need to do is stop listening and start acting more like the fans. He said the audience deals with adversity every day, but they don't fight back; they sit there and they take it. Orton said they're all cowards and they pay money to live through him - to do the things that he does. Example: Orton putting an end to the McMahon era last week.

Cue up a video package from last week's show of Shane McMahon eating announcer table wood at the conclusion of Orton & Cody & Ted vs. Shane in a handicap match. Then, Shane having his ankle/foot/lower limb smashed by the ring steps. Back to Orton and Co., who were now in the ring. Orton said everyone needs to realize that this company revolves around him. He then addressed Batista for their Judgment Day PPV title match.

Orton talked about a No Touching rule ordered by GM Vickie Guerrero until Judgment Day, but they can always talk. Batista then came out dressed to wrestle. Orton said he's going to share something with Batista that he already knows - he's not winning this WWE Title. "Not this Sunday...not ever," he said. Orton told Big Dave about an opportunity. (Pause for "You suck" chant.) Orton said it's an opportunity he previously only offered to 2-or-3-generation superstars, but he's going to offer Batista an opportunity to be part of Legacy.

Batista was unconvinced, then Ted DiBiase took the mic and said he knows Batista is still upset about being Punted in the head, but he was in the same boat. Orton punted him, but it was the wake-up call he needed to get his career on track. Orton said they were in Evolution and the only thing holding them back was Triple H. No worries about him, though, since he took him out. Orton said they would be bigger than Four Horsemen, bigger than DX, bigger than Evolution.

Orton name-dropped Arn Anderson as a sure-fire future Hall of Famer. He said Anderson was Ric Flair's enforcer for over ten years. He offered Batista the Double A role of his enforcer in legacy. Batista said everything he just said makes perfect sense, but there's one problem: "I don't like you." Crowd cheered. "Wait, wait, I take that back. I despise you. No, no, no. I loathe you." Batista said he never has and he never will be Orton's back up.

Batista said he's not here to help you, Orton, but to hurt you. He said there is nothing Orton can do to stop him. Orton said he's just made the biggest mistake of his life. He screamed at Batista that he's lucky there's a No Touching role tonight, otherwise he would drop him right now. Batista laughed a deep laugh, then said he's tired of listening to all this talk, so there's nothing keeping him from destroying him tonight.

"Excuse me!" Vickie Guerrero shouted from off camera. Vickie came out on stage flanked by Chavo Guerrero. She took offense to being called predictable. Vickie said she's waving the No Contact rule tonight and she doesn't care if they tear each other up tonight. She said that title match is taking place on Sunday, and in the mean time, things are going to get interesting. Tonight, it will be Batista vs. DiBiase & Rhodes in a handicap match. Now, that was predictable. Vickie added that if DiBiase & Rhodes win tonight, then it becomes a three-on-one handicap match. If Batista wins, then he gets Orton one-on-one tonight before Judgment Day. She told Orton to get out of the ring now, because that match is next. Batista stalked Legacy before they bailed to the floor. PYB (3) talk time: 14:35.

[Q2]

[Commercial Break]

1 -- BATISTA vs. TED DIBIASE, JR. & CODY RHODES

Match was joined in progress with Batista working over DiBiase. Cody then tagged in and took control momentarily while Lawler filled us in that Shane McMahon is still at a medical facility with a crushed leg. Batista fired up a comeback with a clothesline on Cody before giving him a high back body drop. Batista booted DiBiase off the apron, then he booted Cody to the floor. Cody and DiBiase then ran interference and Cody slid a chair into the ring. Batista picked it up and swung wildly, but Cody moved. Ref saw Batista with chair in hand and called for a DQ. Batista was furious while Cody and Ted celebrated their victory by out-smarting Batista.

WINNERS: Cody & Ted via DQ at 4:05 of TV time. Predicable finish to set up Batista in a three-on-one handicap match later in the show. You can probably count on one hand the number of times Ted or Cody have won matches clean in WWE, but WWE has invested considerable TV time in the duo and given them "center of attention" status with Randy Orton, so their time will come down the line when WWE presents them as credible acts who are capable of actually winning matches. (*)

Video package: Jeff Hardy looking for World Title gold from Edge at Judgment Day.

[Commercial Break]

In-ring: Divas champion Maryse was in the ring to cut a promo. She cut a promo in French, then Jillian Hall came out as her partner for a tag match. Mickie James and Kelly Kelly then came out as the opposition.

[Q3]

2 -- Divas champion MARYSE & JILLIAN HALL vs. MICKIE JAMES & KELLY KELLY

Match built to Mickie taking the hot tag to clean house on Jillian and Maryse, who she's gunning for the title. Jillian tried to sneak-attack Mickie, but Kelly knocked her to the floor and nailed a splash. Back in the ring, Mickie grappled Maryse and nailed her trademark DDT for the pin and the win.

WINNERS: Mickie & Kelly at 3:45. Good to see them given a decent amount of time tonight. Good program build for Mickie finally getting her Divas title shot against Maryse after two straight pins over the champ. (*)

Backstage: ECW broadcaster Josh Mathews brought in Randy Orton for a chat. Orton said it didn't have to be this way with a three-on-one. Suddenly, Ted DiBiase interrupted Orton's promo time. "Cody's missing, man." Orton tried to have a chat with DiBiase off camera, but the camera followed him. Orton shoved down the cameraman and they conferenced from a distance. Batista was determined to be the suspect. Orton and DiBiase then went looking for Cody.

[Commercial Break]

Announcers: Cole and Lawler narrated footage of the Last Man Standing match from Backlash when Big Show KO'ed Cena and cost him the World Title. They showed footage from last week's Raw when Show destroyed Cena and left him for dead in the ring.

Backstage: Chavo sat down with Vickie to chat about some serious issues. Chavo said John Cena isn't medically cleared to compete in the ring until Sunday, but he was chatting with Big Show earlier tonight about Cena having an Exhibition Match to make sure he's really not milking his injuries. Vickie took the idea and booked the Exhibition Match of Cena vs. The Miz. They laughed and giggled, then Chavo said, "Happy Mother's Day."

Announcers: Cole and Lawler were suddenly in the ring to talk Judgment Day. Hm...interesting change of pace for the announcers to hype the PPV from inside the ring versus the "turn your brain off" PPV hype from the announce desk. They added Rey Mysterio vs. Chris Jericho for the IC Title on Sunday.

Backstage: Orton and DiBiase were looking for Cody. No sign of him. Orton finally found Cody at the end of the hallway talking to someone. Orton and Cody then went looking for DiBiase, who was suddenly KO'ed on the other side of the hallway. Medics checked on DiBiase while Orton stared around the hallway in deep thought, thinking someone is trying to mess with him.

[Q4]

[Commercial Break]

Mr. Kennedy video: They aired a video package on Mr. Kennedy returning to Raw. "Coming Soon" said the video graphic.

In-ring: Carlito's music hit and he came out alone before Primo came out to give him some quick props to have a good match. Carlito dropped off his tag title belts before The Brian Kendrick came out to face Carlito. Re-match from last week's quick squash for Carlito.

3 -- Unified tag champion CARLITO vs. THE BRIAN KENDRICK

Carlito nailed a quick dropkick right off the bat. Cole filled in the blanks that TBK requested the re-match after his loss last week. Cole and Lawler said the tag champs have a "special clause" to be able to defend the tag titles on any of the three brands. If they lose, their services are returned to the Raw brand. Kendrick scouted a springboard smash and ran up behind Carlito to shove him into the ropes. Kendrick then blocked the backcracker and shoved Carlito hard into the ringpost. Kendrick suddenly rolled up Carlito from behind for a quick pin for the win.

Post-match: Kendrick took the mic and said that's step one. Step two is him finding The Partner to become one-half of The tag team championsssssss. Kendrick then danced to his theme music to set-up a video replay of the finish.

WINNER: The Brian Kendrick at 1:44. Kendrick gets a win. Good to see that. Hopefully WWE has a decent partner in mind for Kendrick so investing TV time in this program doesn't become a total waste. Of course, WWE has invested a total of five minutes in this mini-feud over the course of two weeks. (n/a)

Up next: Cena vs. Miz in a "Special Exhibition Match."

[Commercial Break]

In-ring: Before we get to the Exhibition Match, Big Show came out to the ring. Announcers sold confusion over why Show was out here instead of Cena or Miz. Show walked over to the announce desk and decided to pop a squat on the edge of the table. Lilian then introduced the Special Exhibition match where both men will compete until Vickie Guerrero decides to stop the match. John Cena came out first to a mega-pop looking very serious. He had a bit more energy than the previous two weeks, but still selling internal injuries. Cena played to the crowd, then stared down Big Show, who Cena's facing at the PPV.

[Q5 -- second hour]

The Miz then came out holding a mic. Cena wasn't paying attention to Miz as he cut his promo. Cena kept staring at Show, so Miz screamed at him. "What's the matter? Are you a little hurt?" he asked. "Awwww. Poor poor Cena." Miz said this isn't "12 Rounds" and people are actually going to see this little exhibition. He said he might be picking on Cena for his movie, but his rap album sucked too. Miz: "I am The Miz. And I am awesome."

4 -- JOHN CENA vs. THE MIZ -- Special Exhibition Match

No referee for this one, so we start the clock with the official square-off between Cena and Miz. Cena took Miz down then shot Show a look. Miz made Cena pay for not keeping his eye on the ball, as he went right to the injured ribs. Miz screamed at Cena to look at him, then he pounded on him some more with kicks to the gut. Miz nailed a running clothesline in the corner, but he missed with a second clothesline. Cena made his traditional comeback with the clotheslines, sit-out slam, and Five Knuckle Shuffle. He then called for the end while staring down Show, but Vickie Guerrero came on screen and said she's putting an end to this exhibition. Vickie declared that it's obvious Cena has no chance against Big Show.

Post-match: Miz grappled Cena from behind and gave him a DDT in center ring. Miz declared himself the victor with a record of 3-0. Miz then ducked out of the ring and applauded himself for his efforts. Big Show then approached the ring, smiled, and walked away without doing anything.

WINNER: No Decision at 2:47. Just a segment to set up Cena vs. Show at Judgment Day. Good use of Miz, even if he wasn't in a position of control before Vickie ended things, but he was positioned well after the heelish sneak attack on Cena. I like Miz's first three weeks on the Raw brand. (n/a)

Backstage: Orton and Cody talked strategy. Cody said they can't let Batista to get another one of them. Orton said he's right, so he gave Cody instructions to find Batista and take him out. Gotta prove yourself, son. Cody took a deep breath and left.

[Commercial Break]

WM25 DVD promo: The WrestleMania 25 DVD comes out next week, including the pre-show tag title match between Colons and Miz & Morrison.

Vickie's office: Chavo and Vickie talked excitedly about how great the Exhibition Match went. Santina Marella then stormed in and Vickie asked Santina why she called her a Swine pig last week. She/he said it was her stupid brother last week. Chavo told Santino(a) to give it up because they all know she's Santino. Vickie brought in Beth and Rosa to prove a point. She told Beth to kiss Santino. Santina freaked. Rosa then approached Santino(a) and kissed him(her). Santino(a) enjoyed it a bit much, so Chavo said that proves she's Santino. Santino(a) took a deep breath, then said he/she's a - how you say it? - ah lesbiano. Everyone went nuts backstage unable to crack the case. Ringside, Cole and Lawler were yukking it up like a bad SNL skit.

Elsewhere Backstage: Cody Rhodes had a pipe in hand looking around for something to hit. Suddenly, there was a clanging noise and Cody opened a side door to find Hornswoggle hiding out. Horny ran away, then a shadow snuck up behind Cody. Batista bashed him from behind and slammed him into the side door.

[Q6]

[Commercial Break]

Don't Try This at Home video package: Cena, Batista, Rey, Triple H, Orton, Jericho and Edge narrated injury clips before Cena did the "Please Don't try this at Home" message. Good to see them include that.

Announcers: Cole reported from ringside that evidence points to Batista being the perpetrator of separate attacks on DiBiase and Rhodes tonight. Will it be Orton vs. Batista one-on-one tonight?

In-ring: Beth Phoenix came to the ring with Rosa Mendes. Cole said Beth must be super-frustrated unable to expose Santino and Santina as the same person. Rico's theme music hit and Santino(a) Marella came out to face Beth.

5 -- SANTINA MARELLA vs. BETH PHOENIX (w/Rosa Mendes)

Crowd chanted for "Santina" after the opening bell. Beth landed an abrupt elbow smash after a little posing from Santina. Beth then clotheslined Santina over the top rope to the floor. She followed with a press slam through the ropes back into the ring. Beth then slapped on an abdominal stretch before putting him/her in the Masterlock. Cole rhetorically asked how long this feud has been going on for, and he suggested two months. More like two years. Beth had enough and blasted Santina with elbow strikes, but Santina rolled her up for a surprise pin and the win.

WINNER: Santina at 2:40. Just an attempt at comedy to fill a slot on the show. So many other wrestlers who could be receiving TV time after the Draft and WWE continues to focus on this well-played-out storyline. (n/a)

[Commercial Break]

Backstage: Josh Mathews caught up with John Cena, who did not appear to be in a good mood. He asked Cena how he's going to compete at Judgment Day. Cena smiled and said he's been going through some hard times the past few weeks, but that doesn't make him any different. Cue up the Dusty Rhodes People's Champion promo about everyone out there in the arena experiencing hard times, so he's going to ante up, adapt, and overcome. Cena said he's not going to Judgment Day to compete against Show, but to win. Mathews started to recap the match, but Cena snapped him back to attention to tell him emphatically one more time that he's going to win.

[Q7]

In-ring: Suddenly, MVP's music hit. Cole and Lawler recapped MVP losing his first match on Raw last week thanks to William Regal. MVP doing the VIP Lounge tonight despite being dressed to wrestle. MVP reminded us big things are popping and little things are stopping. Speaking of little things, William Regal. MVP said he's living big these days, but he's still hood. MVP told Regal to get dressed up and come on down to the VIP Lounge.

Cue up Regal's ominous theme music. Regal smirked and said it's irritating to him that MVP would show up on his show and soil it. Regal said he was unjustly removed from GM of Raw last year, but decided to return as an in-ring competitor. He's waited his turn and paid his dues, but here comes MVP ignoring his tenure and trying to leap over him in the pecking order. MVP said he gets it now: Regal is absolutely miserable. He said he's straight ballin' and Regal is straight boring.

Regal said MVP perfectly represents the U.S.: arrogant (pause for U-S-A" chant), misguide, and despised by everyone else in the world. Regal dropped his mic and took off his ring jacket for a fight, but Matt Hardy's music interrupted. Matt slowly walked out on stage sporting a cast. Not dressed to wrestle tonight. Hardy said he wants to air his grievances tonight. He said he filed a formal request of protest from having to wrestle, but he's been no-sold. Hardy said what would be fair is erasing his loss to Kofi Kingston last week. Hardy told Regal to wait his turn. No one has defeated MVP more times than he has. As soon as his broken hand heals, he deserves the first shot at the U.S. Title.

Regal and Hardy started arguing, but Kofi Kingston suddenly stormed the ring and attacked Hardy. The fight moved to the floor and Kofi went after Hardy. Chavo Guerrero then showed up and demanded the ring be cleared right now. See, they're booking a tag match. Hardy, with a hurt hand and not dressed to wrestle, was not happy and he let everyone know.

[Commercial Break]

6 -- U.S. champion MVP & KOFI KINGSTON vs. WILLIAM REGAL & MATT HARDY

Match was joined in progress with Regal working over Kofi. Meanwhile, Matt used the loaded cast from the ring apron to cut off Kofi's comeback attempt. Matt then tagged in and worked with jeans and white sneakers on before tagging out to Regal.

[Q8]

Kofi countered a Regal mat attack with a head scissors and made the hot tag to MVP, who unloaded on Regal with forearm smashes. MVP landed a big right hand before dropping him across his knee and firing up the crowd. MVP wanted the Big Ballin' elbow drop and he connected. Matt broke up a pin attempt, then Kofi kicked Matt in the cast. Kofi measured Matt for a splash, but Regal chucked Kofi over the top rope to the floor. MVP then tackled Regal in the ring. Meanwhile, Matt took off up the ramp and clear out of sight. Matt then delivered the Chono Boot and Playmaker on Regal for the pin and the win. Lawler played down the babyface victory, saying it was two men beating on one.

WINNERS: MVP & Kofi at 6:26. Babyfaces really didn't benefit since, as Lawler pointed out, they won with an unfair advantage. Overall, just a match to officially start the in-ring portion of the MVP vs. Regal feud, promote Hardy's whiny heel character, and allow Kofi to fly around the ring to show off athleticism. A bit sloppy at times trying to mix all of those elements together. (*1/4)

Backstage: They showed Randy Orton slowly walking down the hallway with the WWE Title belt slung over his shoulder. Main event up next.

Tomorrow on ECW: The return of the Peep Show to ECW TV. Christian hosts Jack Swagger on the Peep Show.

[Commercial Break]

In-ring: Randy Orton came to the ring first for the TV main event, which may or may not be a handicap match. Orton took the mic and addressed Batista. He said he made his point, but there's no good reason for them to fight six days before their title match at Judgment Day. After all, Batista can't even win the title. Orton said he would leave this ring...but Batista's music interrupted. Batista was having no part of Orton trying to back out of the match.

7 -- WWE champion RANDY ORTON & CODY RHODES & TED DIBIASE, JR. vs. BATISTA -- officially a handicap match

Bell sounded to start with a one-on-one match with DiBiase and Rhodes nowhere to be found. Batista clotheslined Orton to the floor, then Orton tried to "slither" away from the ringside area, but Batista pulled him back to the floor and tossed him into the ring for a spinebuster. Batista then went to the floor and grabbed a steel chair. Batista then smashed Orton with the chair to earn another DQ tonight.

Post-match: Batista went to work on Orton by smashing his ankle just like Orton did to Shane McMahon last week. Batista landed chair shots to the back some more, then he went to the floor and grabbed the ring steps. Well, they were stuck, so he violently kicked them to force separation. Batista landed another chair shot on Orton's ankle, stared down the ref, then chucked the chair out of the ring. Batista then lifted up the steel steps, but Cody Rhodes stormed the ring. Batista easily gave him the Batista bomb, though. Ted DiBiase then snuck into the ring from behind and attacked Batista. Orton tried to sneak back in with an RKO, but Batista flung him away. Batista speared DiBiase out of his boots, then Batista picked up the ring steps and chucked them at Orton, who dodged the steps on the floor while selling an ankle injury. "Batista has snapped!" Cole declared.

WINNER: Orton via DQ at 0:58. Conclusion of a wild storyline to set up Batista being in control leading to the PPV with Orton in jeopardy of losing the title. It means a very strong probablity Orton is retaining on Sunday, but a good way to plant seeds of the heel champion being in jeopardy to encourage WWE fans to potentially become PPV buyers to see Orton get his full comeuppance for his dastardly deeds the past few weeks. (n/a)

[Q9 -- over-run]

They replayed Batista snapping on Orton after losing the match by DQ. Batista fired himself up in the ring as the announcers played up Orton vs. Batista for the WWE Title on Sunday. Batista to Orton: "You're done" as they faded to black barely a minute past the top of the hour. Not much of an over-run this week.

We welcome your 0-10 score and comments on this show for a "Raw Reax" feature in the Torch Feedback section of PWTorch.com. To contribute your thoughts on Raw, email to pwtorch@gmail.com.

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