By Wade Keller, PWTorch editor

KELLER'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT
APRIL 4, 2009
AIRED ON MY NETWORK TV

[Q1]

-The show opened with Maryse's ring entrance as Jim Ross introduced the show. During Michelle McCool's ring intro, they showed Tazz at ringside next to Ross for his final Smackdown, although no acknowledgment of that. They commented on a clip of Gail Kim's unsportsmanlike, uncalled for interference on the McCool-Maryse match last week. Of course Ross and Tazz remained neutral, since the booking of Kim's return was so lousy you really can't praise her, but since he's a babyface, you can't criticize her either.

1 -- MARYSE & MICHELLE MCCOOL vs. GAIL KIM & MARIA

Ross said Maria is excited to tag with Kim. Tazz said he wouldn't mind tagging with Kim. The heel duo took control early, isolating Maria in their corner. Gail got a hot-tag at 2:00 and worked over Maryse with a pace of offense that Maryse had trouble keeping up with. Kim hit a crossbody off the middle rope. When McCool made her way into the ring, Kim gave up the cover to knock her to the floor. Kim returned to offense on Maryse, finishing her with a neckbreaker.

WINNERS: Kim & Maria in 3:00.

STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Kim looked really sharp, already the class of the division. Did I mention how boneheaded it was of TNA to low-ball her and let her go? This match was ridiculously short, but what else is new.

-Backstage, Eve Torres approached MVP backstage, asking him about his title defense against Shelton Benjamin later. MVP said tonight is the first step in a three-step process. Step one is he defeats Shelton and retains his U.S. Title. Step two is he goes to the (so-called) 25th Anniversary of WrestleMania and wins the briefcase. Then he goes on to win the World Title. Shelton interrupted and said he's not just facing Shelton, he's facing someone with a chip on his shoulder who is angry and hungry to regain his title. He said his three step plan will end before step one is completed tonight. MVP said he is without question one of the best athletes on the planet, but he's going to find out tonight that while he may be one of the best on the planet, "you ain't better than me." Vince McMahon probably hated that segment because it consisted of two wrestlers talking about the pride of winning and boasting about being better athletes than one another, but that's an ingredient that's really been in low supply. Good segment.

-Ross plugged that they'd show footage from WrestleMania 25 Fan Axxess in Houston, Tex. They showed R-Truth headed to a ring set up at Fan Axxess with Tom Prichard acting as his security guard.

[Commercial Break]

[Q2]

-A video aired on the Matt and Jeff Hardy match, with childhood pictures.

-Todd Grisham hyped Ezekiel Jackson vs. Jeff Hardy, then said he was alongside Jerry Lawler at Fan Axxess. They showed Hornswoggle interacting with fans and then the Undertaker gravesite set. They showed Lawler and Grisham on camera gloating about the Fan Axxess atmosphere. Grisham and Lawler then threw to a lengthy video package on the Jeff Hardy-Matt Hardy feud including the exploitation of Jeff's dead dog. They're just so classy. It's a real testament to the U.S. Title, ECW World Title, and the tag team titles when Matt says he's had a "mediocre" career when Jeff's has "skyrocketed."

[Commercial Break]

-A video package aired on WrestleMania I which was 24 years ago. Boy does that look like ancient history, mainly when they show fans in the crowd with the dated hairstyles and clothes.

-They went back to little kids punching things and playing in a big inflated ring. There were also people getting temporary spray-on WWE tattoos. Grisham talked to Lawler about the Triple Threat match for the WWE Title. Grisham joked that he saw Vickie making out with someone at Fan Axxess. Lawler said something about it being a case of "As the Stomach Turns." They threw to a video package on the Edge-Big Show-Vickie-Cena storyline.

-A commercial aired for "12 Rounds."

[Commercial Break]

-Another video feature aired on Edge-Cena-Show.

-They showed an aerial view of Houston, Tex.

-They went back to Grisham and Lawler who talked more about the Triple Threat match in generic terms. Then they threw to a clip of Show vs. Cena on Raw on Monday.

-A promo aired with Edge sitting backstage with his title belt with a plain dark backdrop. Edge said he woke up with an epiphany. He said his judgment recently has been clouded by the selfish desires of his wife. He said it's turned their personal and professional lives upside down. He said when he bashed Cena in a skull, it came rushing back to him and he remembered that he is the best in the world at what he does. He said those aren't hollow words. He pointed to his title belt and said that backs him up. "This is the key to my happiness," he said. "As long as I have this, everything else in my life will fall into place." He said it allows him to put up with the people who surround him in his life. He shook with intensity and said he'd never let it go as he caressed it. He said The Big Show is bigger than him, "but I am better." He said Cena is stronger than him, "but I am better." He said at the (so-called) 25th Anniversary of WrestleMania, he is going to prove it. Good to see a segment where Edge seemed to get his balls back and instead of pleading with Cena to work with him because there's no way either of them could individually beat Show, he's claiming he's better than both. Also good to see him pushing the value of the title to him, and acknowledge how it's the title that helps him deal with all of his personal issues. The segment might have pushed into the "awkwardly long" category, but the content and points made were valuable headed into Sunday.

[Commercial Break]

[Q4]

-After a clip aired of Kid Rock performing, Grisham said how much he is looking forward to seeing him in person. Lawler wondered if Rock has ever performed in front of 70,000 fans. They turned to the Diva match at WrestleMania. Lawler said, "When Santino was born, his mother wanted a girl, his father wanted a boy, and they were both satisfied, so maybe he does belong in this battle royal." Then they threw to the ridiculously short Diva tag match from Raw on Monday followed by Santino Marella walking out and revealing his man-kini.

[Commercial Break]

-A video package aired on WrestleMania X, the ninth anniversary of WrestleMania, focused again on Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Lawrence Taylor.

2 -- MVP vs. SHELTON BENJAMIN -- U.S. Title match

Shelton settled into the offense, including a chinlock at 2:00. Tazz and Ross talked about the Money in the Bank ladder match, and how intriguing it is because there are no overwhelming favorites. Tazz admired a Shelton suplex, saying back in the day that was his forte. Ross said he was the "Human Suplex Machine."

[Q5]

MVP made a comeback at 5:00. He hit a powerslam and palyed to the crowd for a mild pop. Many fans are still wondering why they're supposed to cheer this guy who spent a year bashing them and bragging up himself, then went on a losing streak, and suddenly for absolutely no reason began playing to them as if he was their hero. MVP went into his finishing sequence for a near fall. Shelton returned fire with a spin wheelkick for a near fall. Shelton hit a top rope flip neckbreaker for a near fall at 6:00. Ross called it "an amazing offensive maneuver." MVP hit a big boot to cut off Shelton's momentum, then his Playmaker for the win.

WINNER: MVP in 7:00.

STAR RATING: ** -- Solid TV match. Pretty much the definition of a two-star average seven minute match. It didn't feel epic or anything, but it was fine for what it positioned to be.

-Ross and Tazz hyped Jeff Hardy vs. Ezekiel Jackson again.

[Commercial Break]

-Back to Fan Axxess. They showed fans making their own ring entrance on a smaller version of the main stage. It's filmed and burned onto a souvenir DVD. They showed some of the historical title belts on display. Lawler talked about the WWE artist show. Then they hyped the entire WrestleMania 25 line-up.

[Q6]

[Commercial Break]

-A video package aired on the Triple H-Randy Orton feud including the latest on Monday with the historical scene of Vince, Shane, and Hunter all on stage together as family.

[Commercial Break]

[Q7]

-A video package aired on Steve Austin.

[Commercial Break]

-Grisham and Lawler threw to a video package on Undertaker and Shawn Michaels from Raw.

[Q8]

[Commercial Break]

3 -- JEFF HARDY vs. EZEKIEL JACKSON (w/The Brian Kendrick)

With seven minutes left in the hour, the first original content of the hour since the three minutes of Shelton vs. MVP that opened the hour. Ezekiel overpowered Hardy at the start. Ross said he wanted to erase from his mind the image of Matt petting the Jack Russell Terrier. At 3:00 Hardy came back and clotheslined Jackson to the floor. Hardy then dove over the top rope onto both Jackson and Kendrick. As Hardy went after Kendrick at ringside, Jackson jumped him from behind. Hardy came back with a DDT in the ring followed by a Twist of Fate and a Swanton for the clean win.

WINNER: Hardy in 4:00.

STAR RATING: 3/4*

FINAL THOUGHTS: There probably shouldn't be any major angles just two days before WrestleMania, but if you've been watching WWE programming recently, this would have been difficult to sit through as there's never been an episode of Smackdown with this much prepackaged video content other than the year-in-review episodes. Not an inspired episode, but the footage from Fan Axxess gave a viewers at home a glimpse into the WrestleMania weekend special events.

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