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3/16 WWE Heat review: "Huge win for Rodney," says Loyd

Mar 17, 2003 - 12:50:00 AM
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WWE Sunday Night Heat review
March 16, 2003
Aired on MTV
Report by Tony Marshall, Torch Team Contributor.


Maybe it's just the early stages of WrestleMania-Hype-Fatigue setting in (already?), but Heat seemed to be one long yawn tonight. The show opened with a flashback to last Monday's Raw that showed the Rock blowing off his match with Booker T because the jaded Great One had only one objective on his mind -- beating Stone Cold Steve Austin at WrestleMania.

The pyro hit, and then -- SURPRISE -- no Jonathan Coachman! Mark Lloyd was filling in for the Coach. Unfortunately, Lita was still there. Alright, alright, they weren't really that bad tonight. At least they acknowledged what was going on in the ring from time to time. They added enough Raw and WrestleMania hype without gushing too much, and they pretty much avoided the extemporaneous bullshit. Okay effort on their part.

(1) Rodney Mack (w/Theodore Long) pinned Tommy Dreamer in 3:57. Some jerkweed gave Long a microphone so he could go off on "The Man." Blah, blah, blah, we haven't been on Raw in a whole week; blah, blah, blah, Back The Mack; blah, blah, blah, we're "thuggin' and buggin.'" Then Dreamer came down the ramp with a Singapore cane. First you get kicked off the writing team, then you're jobbing on Heat. Such is life in good old WWE. Well, it could be worse, I suppose. Dreamer could just as easily be looking for work in Nashville.

So-so match, with Mack doing most of the damage (as you might expect) but Tommy getting some credible licks in. Kind of a sloppy finish, though, as Dreamer went for a DDT (following one of the lamest kicks to the mid-section you'll ever see), but Mack was able to hold onto the top rope. Dreamer hit the floor, Mack hit a neckbreaker, and that was all she wrote. Mark Lloyed remarked as to how this was a "huge win for Rodney Mack." Beating Tommy Dreamer on Heat is a "huge win?" It's not like he beat Rico, after all.

Hey, The Hardy Boyz wrote a book! Oops...sorry Matt and Jeff. I blew my book-buying budget on Showdown, by Larry Elder, "The Sage from South Central." Maybe next month, Extreme Duo.

A WrestleMania XIX/Raw commercial aired highlighting the Austin vs. Rock confrontation, and featuring Limp Bizkit's WMXIX theme. Oh joy.

(2) Spike Dudley pinned Matt Stryker in 4:12. Oooh. Stryker didn't want to shake Spike's hand. It was a squash for the first ninety seconds, with Spike as the squasher instead of his usual role as squashee, then Stryker gave him a thumb to the eye and went on offense. Stryker (who looked to be about the same size as Spike) acquitted himself rather nicely, but in the end he succumbed to a spear and the Dudley Dog. A decent showcase for Matt Stryker.

The Y2J-HBK feud was recapped, with highlights shown of Raw from two weeks ago (when Y2J bloodied HBK with a chair), and last week (when HBK superkicked Y2J on the ramp). So, they're on for WrestleMania. As if you had any doubts.

The "WrestleMania -- Showcase of the Immortals" commercial aired.

Highlights aired of Eric Bischoff's mea culpa speech on last week's Raw. Then, the whole bit with Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock was replayed. I loved this bit when I first saw it and it was just as good tonight. Of course, it was used to promote Stone Cold vs. ATM Eric on this Monday's Raw.

A commercial for Smackdown (of all things!) aired, hyping the contract signing to take place with Vince McMahon and Hulk Hogan. Has there ever been a WWE in-ring contract signing that ended without fireworks?

The WMXIX/Raw/Austin-Rock/Limp Bizkit commercial aired again. No, the song hasn't even started to grow on me yet.

Lugz (featuring the FMF Driving Shoe...I can't believe I just wrote that) Boot of the Week: Triple H and Booker T in the bathroom. "I've got your towel right here, hangin', SUCKA!"

(3) Molly Holly pinned Jacqueline in 2:50. Gee, you know it doesn't really feel like Heat unless Molly wrestles Jacqueline. Short and sweet (just like the two of them). At 2:41, Jacqueline floored Molly with an enzuigiri, but her cover was rather nonchalant and Molly rolled her over and got the duke. Fine for what it was, but nothing we haven't seen before.

Another WMXIX commercial aired; this one running down the card as it stands today. Oh, and they also mentioned that Limp Bizkit will be performing live. I wish Johnny Stamboli was.

Your WrestleMania Moment this week was from WM XV -- Butterbean flattens Bart Gunn.

More highlights from Raw: The Rock vs. The Hurricane; in the locker room and in the ring. I think Burgan's going to give up sex, because nothing will ever make him feel as good as The Hurricane pinning The Rock.

A commercial for WrestleMania 3D on March 23 aired (9:00 ET on TNN). It will feature Vince McMahon, Hulk Hogan, Stone Cold Steve Austin, and Triple H. I'm willing to bet it will be just a little more animated that President Bush's last press conference was. Maybe Vince will even call on Helen Thomas.

(4) Steven Richards (w/Victoria) pinned Al Snow in 4:48. You know, the more I watch Victoria, the more she reminds me of Sherri Martel. Anyway, this was an okay match that had Richards attack Snow outside the ring before the bell rang, after Victoria confronted Snow as he was coming down the ramp. About what you'd expect from these two; one funny spot had Victoria attempt to slap Snow, but he ducked and then kissed her. She seemed to like it. At 2:40, Richards put Snow in The Rat Trap, which he loudly dedicated to Lita. Who knows, maybe when Lita returns to the ring she'll feud with Victoria over Richards's affections. In the end, Victoria tripped up Al Snow which led to Richards nailing him with the Stevie-T to get the victory.

Tonight seemed like a rest stop on The Road to WrestleMania. Nothing special, but nothing too bad, either. The wrestling was unspectacular; strictly by the numbers. Mark Lloyd was fine; so was Lita I hope we get to see more of Matt Stryker -- that this wasn't just a one-shot-deal for him. I think he'd have a decent future if he was on the Smackdown roster where he could face cruiserweights on a regular basis. And I wish we could see more of Al Snow and Maven as a tag team. There was some real chemistry there. Their "whole" is definitely more than the sum of their parts. And it's obvious that Snow's not going anywhere as a single.

Tony Marshall reviews WWE Sunday Night Heat -- hey, somebody's got to -- and writes WWE PPV Single M-alt Perspective Reviews for PWTorch.com, where, every Friday, his "Uncle T" column appears in The Lounge. Send feedback to tmarshall@pwtorch.com.


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