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PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 10/17: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage, including Kozlov vs. Hardy

Oct 17, 2008 - 9:00:53 PM
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By Greg Parks, PWTorch Contributor

WWE Smackdown review
October 17 2008
Taped 10/14/08 in Las Vegas, Nev.
Aired on MyNetwork TV
Report by Greg Parks, Torch Team Contributor


-WWE Open.

-Clips were shown of last week's Triple H vs. Big Show title match, plus the aftermath that led up to this week's Jeff Hardy vs. Vladimir Kozlov match.

-Smackdown Open.

-Jim Ross and Tazz opened the show, noting that the tag title would be on the line as the Colons face Ryder & Hawkins, plus Hardy faces Kozlov.

-Big Show came out, followed quite a distance behind by Chavo Guerrero. Sad that Chavo has been such a background character after some promise he showed when he was in the main event picture in ECW several months ago. Show addressed Undertaker, saying he answered questions about Undertaker's toughness at No Mercy. Show said he never thought of Taker being foolish though, until last week. Show yelled, asking if his fist knocked Taker stupid. He said he knows that Taker wants revenge and redemption and he wants Show to burn in hell. Show plugged his match with Taker at Cyber Sunday, saying he'd let the fans vote for Taker's demise. He mentioned the vote being on WWE.com only. The options are Knockout Match, I Quit Match (Vickie Guerrero's personal favorite match) or Last Man Standing Match. What, no Casket Match? Show said he had three contracted wrestlers backstage, waiting to come out so Show could demonstrate each match.

One jobber came out, with JR saying he had no idea who it is. Show said it was the Knockout Match first.

1- BIG SHOW vs. UNKNOWN- KNOCKOUT MATCH

After hammering on the jobber's back, Show knocked him out with one punch.

WINNER: Show, at :20

Show pulled the jobber out of the ring as medics came to check on him. Big Show immediately called for competitor #2 for the I Quit match.

2- BIG SHOW vs. UNKNOWN- I QUIT MATCH

I think the crowd may have been chanting this guy's name, but I couldn't get it. Show locked in a Cobra Clutch, and Chavo held the mic to the kid so he could say "I Quit."

WINNER: Show, at :25

3- BIG SHOW vs. UNKNOWN- LAST MAN STANDING MATCH

Hurrican Helms, in a bubble, made fun of the jobber's sideburns. Big chop to the chest of the jobber in the corner. Chavo pulled a table from underneath the ring as Show chopped the kid again. Chavo got the table in the ring after the third chop. Show chokeslammed him through the table and he didn't answer the ten-count.

WINNER: Show, at 1:34. If these truly are three wrestlers contracted to Smackdown as JR said, the scouting department needs to be overhauled.

-There was another plug for the choices of the Show-Undertaker match with voting exclusively on WWE.com, then they showed the carnage that Show left behind in the ring.

-Carlito and Primo were backstage talking to each other and getting ready for their title match, which is next.

[Commercial Break]

-JR and Tazz plugged some sort of Divas match tonight I guess, with the winner getting a future shot at the Divas Title. No mention of even the word "match," but they did show that SOMETHING will be taking place with them tonight.

4- PRIMO & CARLITO COLON vs. CURT HAWKINS & ZACK RYDER- WWE TAG TITLE MATCH

Ryder worked Primo's arm, but Primo showed off some nice athletic ability in getting the advantage. He tagged in Carlito, who registered a near-fall. Carlito found himself on the apron and a distraction by Hawkins led to Ryder knocking Carlito off the apron and into the ringside barrier. Hawkins and Ryder did some tagging to keep Carlito in their corner. Carlito fought out of a waistlock and hit a modified neck-breaker (looked to be WCW Reno's "Roll of the dice"). Primo came in and hit a dropkick, trying desperately to get the crowd into it. Neck-breaker and pin broken up by Ryder. Primo to the top, missile dropkick on Ryder for the pin.

WINNERS: Carlito & Primo, at 3:41. Dropkick that finished it was a bit off, but overall a decent enough match.

-Another John Cena video package aired.

-Eve was backstage with MVP. She asked about his strategy for facing R-Truth tonight. He said many of his losses lately have been in tag matches he's been forced to participate in. MVP noted that one more victory and his incentive bonus kicks in. He said he'd be in the casino tearing it up if he wins. Well, at least they're giving an angle to his losing streak.

-They showed highlights of the first Kozlov-Hardy confrontation last month to plug their match tonight.

[Commercial Break]

-MVP and R-Truth came out for their match. In the middle of Truth's entrance, cut to....a commercial break?

[Commercial Break]

5- MVP vs. R-TRUTH

Big hip-toss out of the corner by Truth. They showed Shelton Benjamin watching the match on TV backstage. MVP bent Truth's spine over the top rope and brought him back in the ring for a cover. Spinning forearm by Truth found the mark but a cover only got one. MVP came back after a mistake by Truth to hit a neck-breaker for two. Truth came back and hit a scissors kick for the clean three.

WINNER: Truth, at 2:44. Fine match, but it's weird seeing MVP in two-and-three minute matches when I'm used to seeing him carry the 15-minute ones weekly on the show.

-Vickie was backstage complaining to Big Show about all the problems she's been having since Taker's attack. Funaki walked in and called himself Kung-Fu Naki. He was dressed like a martial artist. Vickie and Show told him to get out, so he did. Then Maryse walked in and asked why she had to take part in the Divas Las Vegas match. Apparently, it's a Fuzzy Dice-on-a-pole match, according to Vickie, "the perfect way to find an opponent for Michelle McCool." That's debatable. Vickie then told Maryse to get out. Finally, Great Khali and Ranjin Singh came in. Vickie told Khali she's been impressed with him. She said she put him in a match tonight where he can show his dominance. Vickie then said his opponent would be Undertaker. Khali (thru Singh) said he wasn't a puppet for Vickie and Show to manipulate. Show then went face-to-face with the big man, saying they came to him out of compassion and that Vickie could make his life very difficult. They stared each other down to end the segment.

[Commercial Break]

-A Kizarny vignette aired, and it looked like the same one as last week.

-The Brian Kendrick and Ezekiel came out. Ezekiel was sans his white jacket, instead just wearing black trunks. Looked a bit like Bad News Brown. Kendrick said a slight tickle in his throat has prevented him from competing tonight. He said his doctors checked him out and he has an infection. Kendrick spoke directly to his opponent, Super Crazy, and said Ezekiel would be stepping in for him tonight.

6- EZEKIEL JACKSON vs. SUPER CRAZY

I believe this is Zeke's in-ring debut. JR just confirmed it for me. Hurricane Helms in a bubble made fun of the size of Zeke's tights. They were.... a little tight. Big back elbow by Zeke on Crazy. Big Rock Bottom, only Jackson stayed on his feet. That got the win.

WINNER: Jackson, at :42.

After the match, Kendrick hit The Kendrick on Crazy.

-Tazz plugged the Divas Las Vegas match coming up tonight.

[Commercial Break]

-A video package aired on WrestleMania and plugged the on-sale date for WM25.

-Triple H was backstage with Eve. Video was shown of Kozlov attacking HHH after his match, then Hardy attacking Triple H. HHH said it's a reminder what guys will do to become WWE Champion. He then talked about his possible opponents for Cyber Sunday. He questioned whether Hardy would even make it to Cyber Sunday. He said if you want to be WWE Champion, you have to go through him.

-Back in the arena, Taker's bell tolled and he made his entrance.

7- UNDERTAKER vs. GREAT KHALI

Taker threw some punches at Khali in the corner, but Khali reversed things and got some kicks of his own in. I'm not sure if Taker was blocking Khali's punches or not as he was punching away, but he got downed with a clothesline soon after. Nerve hold by Khali, then a big chop to the head, which only got two. Vice grip was broken by Taker, then he hit a flying clothesline. Big Show ran into the ring and before he even touched Taker, referee Charles Robinson called for the bell.

Show hit a chokeslam, then retrieved a chair from ringside. Show barked orders to Khali, but Khali knocked it out of Show's hand, then left the ring. Show yelled at Khali, and Taker sat up, grabbed the chair, and hit Show in the back, knocking him over the top and out of the ring. Show retreated up the aisle.

WINNER: Taker by DQ, at 3:22. They managed to fit all of Khali's trademark spots into those three minutes.

[Commercial Break]

-JR announced next week's main event: Triple H vs. Undertaker. Wow, that's a big match to give away. At least they've got a week to hype it.

8- MARIA vs. MARYSE vs. NATALYA vs. VICTORIA vs. BRIE BELLA -DIVAS LAS VEGAS MATCH (AKA PINK FUZZY DICE ON A POLL MATCH)

Victoria fought off all the girls to get to the top first, but couldn't get the dice and was slammed off by Natalya. Maria fought off Brie Bella, but Maryse pulled Maria's legs as she was climbing the rope, causing her to hit the mat face-first. Victoria and Natalya double-teamed Maryse to keep her from getting the dice. Brie got Maryse on her shoulders to keep her from getting the dice, but Maryse punched Brie in the head then threw her shoulder-first into the ring post. Maria punched Maryse off the top rope and got the dice for the win.

WINNER: Maria, at 2:09. Not much of a match in terms of wrestling; they were just all pulling each other off the top rope to avoid losing, one after the other.

-Tonight, Kozlov faces Jeff Hardy.

[Commercial Break]

-Another Cena return video.

8- KENNY DYKSTRA & RYAN BRADDOCK vs. JESSE & FESTUS

These were the two who were wrapped up by MyMovingCo, if you'll recall. Biel out of the corner by Festus, then a big right hand and a tag to Jesse. Dykstra managed to tag in and get some offense on Jesse. Braddock came in and landed a knee-drop. Hurricane Helms came on the screen, saying Dykstra loses almost as much as MVP.....almost. He's just sayin' (actually, he didn't say that after this one). Jesse managed to make a tag to Festus, who annihilated Dykstra. Big splash by Festus, but Braddock interrupted the count. Jesse low-bridged him out of the ring and Dykstra got flapjacked for the win by Festus.

WINNERS: Jesse & Festus, at 3:43. So much for Dykstra & Braddock's revenge.

-Two weeks ago, Kozlov battering-rammed Hardy in the gut. They finally face each other one-on-one, tonight.

[Commercial Break]

-Another Kizarny promo, this time a different one. A little less unsettling then the first, I suppose.

-Backstage, Michelle McCool congratulated Maria on winning her match tonight. Michelle said it'd be an honor defending her title against her. They traded an uncomfortable silence, then Michelle walked away. Jesse & Festus walked up to Maria, and Festus gave her a flower for her win. Maria thanked him, and kept thanking him when he didn't walk away and just stood there staring. Jesse got them out of there by explaining they were heading to a Wayne Newton show.

-JR plugged the on-sale date for WrestleMania 25 and Tazz talked about Smackdown breaking it's own MyNetwork TV viewership record. They both ran down the Cyber Sunday card.

-Triple H came out to join the commentary team for the Hardy vs. Kozlov match.

[Commercial Break]

9- JEFF HARDY vs. VLADIMIR KOZLOV

Kozlov did an inset interview, saying he'd beat HHH if voted in on Cyber Sunday. Hardy tried to hit and run, but a Kozlov shoulderblock put him down. This should be a test for Kozlov, as I don't recall another match of his going as long as I expect this one to. Kozlov got a two-count, then got rammed shoulder-first into the corner. The show then went to break.

[Commercial Break]

Kozlov had Hardy in a rest-hold, a sort-of arm-bar. HHH wisely noted that no matter how good Kozlov is, the voting could come down to a popularity contest and if so Hardy would win. He then said if it was his choice, Kozlov would be the one he'd face. Hardy tried to fight back, but Kozlov hit headbutts to Hardy's chest then got a side-throw for two. Hardy tried a Twist of Fate, but couldn't get it. Whisper in the Wind was hit solidly and Kozlov went down. Another Whisper in the Wind. Hardy then went to the top rope, but Kozlov moved. Hardy landed on his feet. He hit the ropes, but was hit with a headbutt to the chest by Kozlov, who covered Hardy and got three.

WINNER: Kozlov, at 8:18. Surprised about the clean pin. Kozlov seemed to hold up his end of the match well.

Triple H got in the ring after the match and went face-to-face with Kozlov. He held the title up as the show faded out.

Greg Parks has been covering Smackdown for PWTorch.com since February of 2007. You can also hear him every-other-week in the post-Raw audio show Monday nights in the Torch VIP audio section. Check out his new column in a PDF-exclusive version of the Torch Newsletter. Comments, questions and feedback is welcome, and can be sent to g_man9784@yahoo.com.


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