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KELLER'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 7/11: Edge vs. Big Show no-DQ, Kozlov gets music, Festus & Ryder vs. Ryder & Hawkins
Jul 15, 2008 - 11:23:10 PM


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By Wade Keller, Torch editor

KELLER'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT
JULY 14, 2008
TAPED IN BATON ROUGE, LA.


[Q1]

-Clips aired of Edge's breakdown last week and the Vickie Guerrero-Edge confrontations leading to the wedding being called off. The video package topped two minutes.

-As Edge's ring intro began the show, Jim Ross and Mick Foley introduced the show. Ross said Edge has been through a traumatic few weeks personally and professionally. The crowd chanted "You suck!" at Edge as he stood center-ring. He said last week at the end of Smackdown he called off his marriage to Vickie. He said he's had a week to contemplate his feelings and he stands by his statement - the wedding is off. He said he proposed to Vickie because he loved and cherished her. He said he saw them as equals, but the minute she tried to give him orders, he saw things differently. "I don't work that way; I'm the Rated-R Superstar." He said he's won more championships than anyone in the "industry." He said: "Pick a name; I'm on top of it." He said he'd prove it again at the Great American Bash when he defeats Triple H and once again becomes WWE Champion."

Vickie rolled out and said, "Excuse me! Excuse me!" I still say that t-shirt would sell well - a Vickie t-shirt that exclaimed "Excuse me! Excuse me!" She said she was putting him in a match tonight to "help prepare" him for his title match against Triple H at the Great American Bash - a no-DQ match against The Big Show. Edge said he's not scared of The Big Show. He said by the end of the show The Big Show would be a loser like her. She ordered his mic to be turned off, then she laughed.

[Commercial Break]

[Q2]

-A video promoted the arrival of Maria.

1 -- MATT HARDY vs. SHELTON BENJAMIN

Ross said Teddy Long generously loaned Smackdown to ECW tonight. Foley said he's been very generous with his loaning. He said he's going to try to get a few bucks off of him. Ross said they're in the town where Junkyard Dog used to rule the roost. Ross complimented Shelton for being the best pure athlete in WWE (which translated means he's got the most unfulfilled potential so what's taking him so long to step up and utilize it). Foley asked Ross to elaborate. Ross said he has to learn how to stay at the top of his game. Foley said Shelton has at times been frustrated with his lack of upward mobility in WWE from time to time. This is good commentary because it gives different levels of viewers different ways to read and interpret the commentary. At 4:00 when Hardy climbed to the top rope, Shelton leaped to the top rope and shoved Hardy off balance. Hardy still managed to come off the second rope, though, and hit Shelton leading to a two count. Shelton followed up with a T-Bone Suplex for a near fall. Shelton took too long to follow up. Foley noted his posturing. Hardy recovered and stopped Shelton's attempt at offense off the ropes. Shelton surprised Hardy out of nowhere leading to a surprise three count in this non-title match. Ross said if Shelton wasn't in the U.S. Title hunt before this match, he is now.

WINNER: Shelton in 6:00.

STAR RATING: *1/2 -- Pretty short, but good in that span. This is good basic satisfying booking. A wrestler aspiring to get a title beats the champ in a non-title match to set up a deserved title shot. It's simple and it works when it's the rule instead of the exception.

-Curt Hawkins told Vickie he and Zach Ryder want a match against Jesse & Festus. Vickie granted them their wish. Ryder said she deserves someone so much better than Edge, someone who will love and cherish her forever. She began to cry. They said they'd be there for her always. So sweet.

[Commercial Break]

[Q3]

2 -- MR. KENNEDY vs. DOMINO

MVP joined Ross and Lawler at the broadcast table. He said it's an honor for Ross and Foley to share a table with a future first-ballot Hall of Famer. Kennedy took a little dig at MVP during his self-ring-intro. MVP said Kennedy fired the first shot, so now he may make some critical comments about Kennedy during this match. He credited Kennedy for having some big wins over some former world champions in his career. Foley said, "I heard Mr. Kennedy had original thought and then it died of loneliness." What, is Jerry Lawler feeding Foley lines through his headset?

WINNER: Kennedy via a Mic Check in 3:00. Domino seems to be inevitably on his way to being either released or repackaged later this year.

-Afterward, Kennedy stared at MVP at ringside. Umaga then surprised Kennedy with a kick to the jaw and a Samoan Spike to the throat. MVP laughed from ringside, then gloated in Kennedy's face briefly.

-Chavo Guerrero, with Bam Neely sitting behind him, told Edge he can't believe Vickie is punishing him by making him face Big Show. He said he would never let a woman talk to him the way Vickie did. He said he's going to straighten it out by going over to her office and giving her a piece of his mind. He said he and Edge are always going to be family no matter what happens. An emotional Edge told Chavo he appreciates that.

[Commercial Break]

-Chavo barged into Vickie's office. He interrupted her talking on the phone. Chavo told her, "I can't believe what that jerk did to you by calling off the wedding." He said Edge is arrogant and a liar. "I don't know if he ever did love you," he said, adding that they have to stick together and show their love for each other. "We are family. We are Guerreros." Vickie told Chavo, "Cut the crap. I'll show you my love. Tonight you're going to be competing against Triple H." How did she know he was full of crap? Was she watching her own show? If that's officially possible, then Chavo knew there was a camera filming him, so why would be be so openly two-faced?

-A clip aired of Miz getting pinned on ECW last Tuesday.

[Q4]

3 -- THE MIZ & JOHN MORRISON vs. FINLAY & HORNSWOGGLE

Ross said he was excited about coming to Smackdown, but he didn't know it'd be like "As the World Turns" with so much family and relationship feuding. Finlay opened the match by clotheslining both heels one after another, then Hornswoggle leaped onto both at one. He gave Miz a Stunner, then Morrison. Ross said next thing you know he'll be drinking beer. Morrison took over control on Hornswoggle with a foot on his chest. \Hornswoggle escaped to hot-tag Finlay after giving Morrison an enzuigiri while Morrison got on his knees to mock him. Finlay gave Morrison the Celtic Cross, but Miz broke up the subsequent pin attempt. Morrison tagged in Miz, but Finlay KO'd him immediately with a Shillelagh. Hornswoggle followed up with a Tadpole Splash or the pin. Foley said they are in for a tag team title shot.

WINNERS: Hornswoggle & Finlay. in 4:00.

STAR RATING: 1/2* - This is a bit silly having Hornswoggle in the ring wrestling full-sized people as if it's business as usual. At least they gave Miz & Morrison the "out" of losing due to being hit with Finlay's stick.

[Commercial Break]

-They showed the exterior of the arena.

-A video feature aired on Jeff Hardy posing for a cover photo shot for an upcoming WWE Magazine. He said it's the first computer-generated cover.

-Ring intros took place for Triple H vs. Chavo Guerrero, with Triple H first.

[Q5]

4 -- TRIPLE H vs. CHAVO GUERRERO

Triple H ended a battle over armbars with a punch to the face. Then he tossed Chavo into the ringpost in the corner.

[Q5]

Bam Neely interfered to give Chavo an advantage. Triple H came back at 4:00 with a spinebuster. Bam stepped on the ring apron, but Hunter knocked him off and finished Chavo with a Pedigree.

WINNER: Triple H in 5:00.

STAR RATING: * -- Fine for a short TV match.

[Commercial Break]

-The "Did You Know?" fact said WWE has sold more than 39 million video game copies this decade.

-They showed Ross and Foley on camera at ringside. They plugged the Diva's Championship match at the Great American Bash PPV.

4 -- NATALYA & MARYSE vs. MICHELLE MCCOOL & CHERRY

McCool hit a nice early dropkick on Maryse. Cherry tagged in, but soon was on defense against Natalya. Natayla won soon thereafter with a Sharpshooter. Ross said Uncle Bret was probably proud of her.

WINNERS: Natalya & Maryse in 2:00.

-Afterward, Natalya went after Michelle and knocked her to the floor where she suplexed her. She then admired the Diva's Title belt and said that'd be hers, then she let out a guttural heel laugh.

[Q6]

[Commercial Break]

5 -- JESSE & FESTUS vs. ZACH RYDER & CURT HAWKINS

The bell rang and Festus went berserk with intensity. When Jesse started the match, Festus paced on the ring apron. When Jesse tagged in Festus at 1:00, he pounded on Ryder. Ryder and Hawkins were so intimidated by Festus, they got intentionally counted out. The bell rang to end the match. Festus went all calm. Ross said he was "back in never never land" and "back on the farm." That left Jesse vulnerable for a two-on-one attack, then they went after Festus. Jesse, though, rang the bell at ringside. Festus popped up and began beating on Ryder. Jesse returned to the ring to beat on Hawkins.

WINNERS: Jesse & Festus in 2:00 via countout.

[Commercial Break]

-A video feature aired on Triple H declaring himself the best. "Triple H: The King of Kings: There Is Only One" said the graphic at the end.

[Q7]

6 -- VLADIMIR KOZLOV vs. STEVIE RICHARDS

Kozlov has entrance music now. It sounded like music you'd hear at a drug-filled fight-club bar in an Eastern Block country, so it fit. It was probably more unique to not have music, but if they were going to give him music, this works. A graphic on the screen plugged that the new WWE Magazine has a life-sized Hornswoggle poster inside. Kozlov applied a body scissors with his legs. Ross said that hasn't been used as a common hold since the early 1900s at the county fairs. Well, if you weren't sure Michael Cole was gone, that comment drove it home. Richards showed signs of life at 2:00 with an enzuigiri, but it got just a one count. Kozlov KO'd Richards with a snap headbutt to the back of Richards's head. Ross said no one in WWE can replicate Kozlov's unique style.

WINNER: Kozlov in 3:00.

-Edge gave Chavo a hard time backstage, accusing him of throwing him under the bus in his meeting with Vickie earlier. Ryder and Hawkins entered the room. Edge said Vickie's antics are messing with their minds. Edge asked everyone to come out to the ring with him for his no-DQ match against Big Show. Vickie wheeled in and said if any of them go out there and help Edge, she'll fire them. She said if Edge doesn't go through with the match, she'll fire him, too. She said she may not be his fiance anymore, but she is still his boss. She told him to "go out there like a man, if you are a man."

[Commercial Break]

-Clips aired of Kane snapping on Raw earlier in the week. Then Ross said at ringside that's another reason he's happy to be on Smackdown. Foley said that was a reminder just how devastating The Big Red Machine can be. They then went into a plug for the entire Bash line-up.

[Q8]

7 -- EDGE vs. THE BIG SHOW - No DQ Match

Vickie watched from the stage. Show opened with a hard, loud chop to Edge's chest. Show tossed Edge around ringside for a minute until Edge surprised Show with a spear. They cut to a break with both men down.

[Commercial Break]

Edge had a kendo stick in hand. Vickie had wheeled herself to ringside, snarling at Edge. Edge hit Show in the ribs with the stick. Show no-sold it and pressed Edge in the air. Edge kneed out of Show's grip. Show continued to toss Edge around ringside. Edge leaped off the security wall onto Show with a bulldog onto the floor mat. Back in the ring Edge kicked a charging Show, then applied a sleeper type hold while hanging on Show's back. Foley said even if Edge survives, how much will be left in his tank on Sunday when he faces Triple H. Show backdropped Edge to the mat to escape. Show went for a chokeslam at 9:00. Edge countered with a DDT in a nice move. When Edge charged at Show with a chair, Show punched the chair with his fist and knocked Edge backward. Edge used a low blow to defend himself - legal in this no-DQ match. Edge smashed Show with a chair, then set a chair under Show's head. When Foley said the chair was "resting" under Show's head, Ross said that might be an "Oxy-moronic statement." Show, though, popped up and gave Edge a chokeslam. He then set Edge's head on the chair. He grabbed a chair himself. Vickie told Show to stop just as he was about to smash Edge. She got into the ring and screeched for the bell to ring to end the match. The bell rang.

WINNER: No contest in 13:00.

STAR RATING: **1/4 -- They put together a nice 13 minutes of TV action before the non-finish.

-Show held the chair in the air, then let it drop. Vickie got down and hugged Edge. The crowd didn't know how to react other than some scattered boos. Ross wondered if they were witnessing a change or heart. Edge finally recovered enough to sit up and see Vickie sitting there proclaiming her love for him again. Edge finally broke into a smile and said he loves her, too. After much suspense and anticipation, Edge moved in for a mashing session. They made out as the show ended.


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