By James Caldwell, Torch columnist

ECW TV Report
January 29, 2008 in Reading, Pa.
Year 2, Week 34 (Week 86 overall) on Sci-Fi

They opened with a dramatic video package recapping Chavo Guerrero's ECW Title victory over C.M. Punk last week, with help from Edge. Live in the arena, Joey Styles and Tazz plugged Chavo Guerrero's fiesta to celebrate the title victory.

Kane opened the show with his ring entrance and there must have been a pack of John Cena fans sitting near the arena mic screaming at the top of their lungs. Shelton Benjamin came out to face Kane as they recapped Shelton eliminating Kane on last week's show to win the mini-Rumble.

1 -- KANE vs. SHELTON BENJAMIN

Kane tried to throw Shelton over the top rope, but Shelton skinned the cat and back-flipped into the ring, just like last week. Kane then clotheslined him over the top rope to the floor to accomplish his goal. Back in the ring, Kane went up top, but Shelton did his cat-like leap and flipped Kane off the top to the floor. Shelton went on the attack by wrapping Kane's knee around the ringpost. He then worked on Kane's left knee with various mat holds. Suddenly, Kane grabbed Shelton by around the throat to tease a chokeslam, but Shelton kicked him in the knee. Kane answered with a clothesline followed by an uppercut and a corner lariat. Shelton then walked into a powerslam out of the corner for a two count. Kane followed with a sidewalk slam before going up top and landing a leaping clothesline. He called for the chokeslam, but Shelton countered with a jumping spin kick to the face.

Shelton slowly crawled to the corner and went up top, but Kane sat up and teased a chokeslam. Shelton fought off, though, and went back into the ring where he took a big boot to the face. Shelton rolled to the outside, then he started walking up the entrance ramp. He seemed to have enough and stopped at the top of the stage. The ref counted to ten and Kane threw his elbow pad down in frustration despite winning the match. Kane wanted more of a piece, but Shelton shook his head no that he was done for the night.

WINNER: Kane via count-out in 7:00. A good opener. Better-than-average ECW match that leaves some unfinished business they can follow-up on next week. (**)

They cut to Kelly Kelly walking around backstage. She had a tentative smile on her face.

[Commercial Break]

[Q2]

Kelly Kelly walked out dressed for a match. Tazz asked Styles if you ever see Kelly in a bad mood. He said she's always happy and in a good mood. As for her opponent, Victoria came out to take care of some business. Styles said now would be a good time for Kelly to stop smiling.

2 -- KELLY KELLY vs. VICTORIA

Victoria and Kelly had a shoving match to start things off, with Victoria winning that early exchange. Layla and Lena then stormed the ringside area with scowls on their face. Kelly suddenly snapped off a back flip into an arm drag take over that looked pretty good. Victoria wasn't impressed, though, and whipped Kelly down to the mat with a handful of hair. Kelly came back with a spinning head scissors before landing a series of flying clotheslines. She then jumped onto Victoria's shoulders for a crisp huracanrana. Victoria quickly answered with a kick to the gut before nailing the Widow's Peak for the win.

Afterward, Layla and Lena clapped it up for Victoria, who motioned that was easy. Layla then went into the ring and picked up Kelly. She kinda tossed her down to the ring. That was the worst spot of the segment after a good showing in the ring. The Mean Girls stood tall in the ring while Kelly remained KO'ed on the mat.

WINNER: Victoria in 3:00. If you went into the match with low expectations, then you walk away impressed with the action. Kelly had some good-looking moves in this one, so kudos for showing improvement. The storyline has some room to grow, with Victoria hopefully finding a spot on TV. She's too valuable to not be used on TV. (*)

They went backstage where Colin Delaney was sitting on a trunk all taped up. Yes! He could barely move. Meanwhile, Nunzio talked to someone in the background.

[Commercial Break]

Styles went right into plugging the Orton vs. Cena main event for No Way Out.

In the ring, Tazz asked for a round of applause for Colin Delaney. He got booed. Poor guy. Tazz said Colin isn't dressed up like a mummy. Colin shot Tazz an eyebrow for the bad cliché. Greatness. Tazz wanted to roll footage of Colin's beatings, but Colin shook his head no. Tazz, a realist on the TV ratings, said some of the viewers might not be caught up on Colin's beatings. He turned Colin toward the video screen so Colin could watch the painful beatings. Back in the ring, Colin held his ribs in pain. He was booed for still standing and being alive. Tazz had some really good news for tonight. He said Colin doesn't have to face one man tonight. He said it's a two-on-one handicap match...against the WWE tag champs. Colin grimaced, then Miz walked out, followed by John Morrison.

[Q3]

3 -- WWE tag champions JOHN MORRISON & THE MIZ vs. COLIN DELANEY

Tazz said Colin is either filled with heart or is just plain dumb for taking all these beatings and not leaving the ring. Styles said the tag champs are upset about not winning the Rumble, so they're going to take out their frustrations on Colin. The bell sounded and Morrison played around with Colin. Suddenly, Miz blindsided him with a forearm. Morrison took Colin to the corner and punched him in the face before Miz hit his running clothesline. Suddenly, Morrison missed with a corner splash when Colin fell out of the way. Same thing with Miz. Colin gets offense via a good defense!

Miz, pissed off, dragged Colin to the outside and smashed him on the floor. Morrison then jumped through the ropes with a dive onto Colin. Back in the ring, the tag champs gave him a double pancake. Miz covered Colin, but pulled him up before a three count. He then hit the combo of a knee lift into a neckbreaker. Morrison finished him off with a corkscrew neckbreaker. He put one finger on Colin's chest while Miz put a boot on his chest for the pin and the win.

After the match, Miz and Morrison added insult to injury with a double chokeslam. Suddenly, Tommy Dreamer stormed the ring to make the save for Colin and clear the heels. Dreamer checked on Colin, who tried to check for his own vital signs. Dreamer eventually pulled Colin to his feet and helped him stand somewhat tall in the ring. Dreamer pointed to Colin's heart and nodded approvingly while Colin tried to look alive. The champs stood tall on the floor with the belts high in the air.

WINNERS: Miz & Morrison in 2:00. That's one of the best segments in the history of ECW. First of all, there's Colin Delaney. His mannerisms are gold. Then, they get over the heel tag champs as more than just pretty-boys with a mean streak. They needed that, as they haven't won a match convincingly in some time. And, Dreamer gets some TV time to possibly start a program with Colin "Whipwreck" Delaney chasing the belts. Greatness. (*)

[Commercial Break]

C.M. Punk's music hit and the girls screamed again. Punk walked out for a singles match. Styles said Punk had the ECW Title stolen from him last week. Tazz played devil's advocate that at the end of the day, there's a new ECW champion. Styles said it was made worse by Chavo eliminating him in the Rumble match. Elijah Burke walked out as the opponent. Styles said Burke had a good number at the Rumble with #28, but Triple H buzz-sawed him.

4 -- C.M. PUNK vs. ELIJAH BURKE

Punk started on the offensive with hard chops to the chest. Suddenly, Burke came off the top with a flying elbow smash. He rammed Punk into the corner turnbuckle before landing uppercut blows to the gut and a back suplex for a one count. Punk came back with a flying knee lift in the corner. They went into an exchange of whips into the ropes, with Burke trying to leap frog Punk, but Punk caught him on his shoulders and nailed the Go 2 Sleep. Punk covered Burke for the win. Tazz said Punk showed good heart not letting the loss last week set him back.

WINNER: Punk in 4:00. Good showing for Punk to get back on track after the title loss. Commentary was solid getting that across. There's a double-edged sword with Burke that he's good enough to be a credible victory for Punk, but he's also good enough to where he's more valuable than losing clean in four minutes. (*1/2)

They showed footage of Rey giving Vickie the 619 at the Rumble on accident when she took the bullet for Edge. Tazz questioned why Rey didn't put the brakes on so he wouldn't hit a woman. Interesting tease of a new direction for Rey's character. Styles reasoned that Rey had a full head of steam and couldn't stop. They plugged Chavo's fiesta coming up.

[Q4]

[Commercial Break]

Styles and Tazz plugged the Elimination Chamber match for No Way Out in a few weeks. Kofi Kingston then came out all-smiles for the default main event match. Not much of a crowd reaction. Rob Echo is the opponent.

5 -- KOFI KINGSTON vs. ROB ECHO

Kofi went into his fighting stance before locking up with Rob. He went for a side headlock before running over Rob with a series of shoulder blocks. Kofi with a leg sweep into another side headlock. He then caught Rob off the ropes with a running splash. Kofi then nailed a leaping dropkick and an enziguiri for the win.

WINNER: Kofi Kingston in 3:00. Better than last week, as he showed more offensive holds in his repertoire. Still has some edges to smooth out, which should happen over time. (3/4*)

They went backstage where Mariachi players were strumming their guitars before the fiesta.

[Commercial Break]

The Mariachi players were already in the ring out of the break while ECW GM Armando Estrada stood in center ring to oversee the festivities. The Mariachi music was not well-received in Reading, Pa. Tazz called it Mariachism. The music stopped and Armando said it's his honor and pleasure to introduce the new ECW champ Chavo Guerrero. The fans booed, then Chavo walked out in a suit with the ECW Title around his waist. Styles said it's fitting for Armando to introduce Chavo since there is speculation of collusion between Vickie and Armando. Chavo posed in the ring while the fans booed him. Armando said it's unfortunate that Vickie cannot be here tonight due to a tragic injury suffered at the Rumble. He said neither will be Edge, who is by her side. Armando said they did send along this pre-recorded video message.

They cut to Edge on the video screen. He said they really wanted to be there for Chavo tonight. But thanks to Rey's 619 on Vickie (cheers from the crowd), Vickie isn't in a good place tonight. Edge said he's here with her to ease her pain. He thanked Chavo for winning the title to join their family of champions. Edge introduced a video package on Chavo's career highlights, with Bobby Heenan having a cameo voice-over spot. Back in the ring, Chavo was all-smiles.

[Q5 -- over-run]

Chavo thanked Edge for that touching tribute and said Edge is his familia, his brother, and his friend. He then cut a promo on Edge getting a piece of Rey for what he did to Vickie. Chavo addressed the fans and said, "I told you so." Boos from the crowd. Chavo said they didn't want to listen to him, though. He said C.M. Punk is not the future of this business. The fans chanted, "You suck" while one of the Mariachi players smiled. Chavo paused, then said Punk was nothing more than a stepping stone for him. He said 2008 is his year to become champion again. Chavo announced himself as the new ECW champion, then he flashed the title belt for the hard camera. Chavo invited everyone to celebrate his championship and called for a fiesta.

The Mariachi men started to play again, and they were being led by a mystery Mariachi player with his back to Chavo. Chavo then did a little dance before red and green balloons fell from the ceiling. Armando clapped it up for Chavo, then Chavo bumped into the mystery Mariachi player. Suddenly, the mystery Mariachi player turned around and smashed his guitar over Chavo's head. The mystery Mariachi player took off his hat to reveal C.M. Punk with a fake 'stache. Punk then ripped off the 'stache and grabbed the ECW belt from Chavo, who was KO'ed on the mat while covered in balloons. Punk's music hit as the crowd popped for Punk's somewhat heelish attack on Chavo. They rolled a video replay and Punk had this greatest-ever look on his face (with the 'stache accentuating the greatness of the image) right before he smashed Chavo. Punk stood tall in the ring over Chavo to close the show.

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