By James Caldwell, Torch columnist

TNA Impact on Spike TV
September 27, 2007
Taped September 24 in Orlando, Florida
Report by James Caldwell, Torch columnist

They start the show with Karen Angle fake apologizing to Sting last week, then the fake babyface running into the ring to make sure Karen was arrested. They recapped Rikishi and Joe cleaning up on Christian's group.

They cut backstage where James Mitchell cut a promo while walking with Judas Mesias and Jeremy Borash. Mitchell said they would spill Sting's blood all over the arena. He then opened a side exit door and said they would be waiting for Sting.

1 -- TEAM 3D (BROTHER RAY & BROTHER DEVON) vs. THE GURU SONJAY DUTT & SHARK BOY

Guru did his act before the match and Brother Ray wasn't very convinced by the peace and love act. The humungous Devon started things off with Shark Boy and dominated him with chops before Shark Boy bit him on the rear end. Ray did a mock laugh, then Shark Boy bit him on the rear end. Ray and Devon started arguing, so Shark Boy nailed a top rope dropkick on both men. Guru tagged in and offered a handshake to Ray, who hitched up his pants and shook the hand. Guru gave the shake a kiss, then Ray rubbed his shoulders with a smile. Ray went for a kiss himself, but Devon screamed at him. Ray ignored him and planted a kiss before clotheslining Guru hard to the mat. Ray then picked up Dutt and hugged him before landing a hard chop to the chest. Shark Boy then came into the ring with a tambourine and smashed Devon across the head. Apparently it's No DQ. Guru and Shark Boy then set up the top rope headbutt to Ray's crotch and Shark Boy nailed the headbutt. They tried to get the tables, but Devon landed a double clothesline on the cute little babyfaces. Team 3D then finished off Shark Boy with a 3D for the win. Afterward, Team 3D grabbed chairs and tried to crunch Shark's neck with a conchairto, but Guru dragged Shark Boy out of the ring to save him from damage.

WINNERS: Team 3D in 6:00. An attempt at comedy by Team 3D before getting serious with the 3D and post-match beating on Sharkie. Just a tag match. (*)

Backstage, Jeremy Borash plugged some sort of deal with the fans being able to dictate what's going on in TNA. Borash said the texting option this week is to vote on whether there should be an automatic re-match clause for Sting vs. Angle at the PPV. VKM then interrupted. (They're still on the roster?) B.G. said they've run through every tag team in TNA and just because someone can do a back flip doesn't mean he's a pro wrestler. He said he takes dumps bigger than some of the guys on the roster. He shot the bird to the camera and said they don't need the wrestling fans. He said they're marks who don't know what the VKM is capable of. B.G. called Borash a mark, then said the fans are on the other side of the curtain for a reason. (Boy, I can't remember the last time anyone paid enough attention to an irrelevant tag team like VKM to "inspire" this promo.) Kip said he's glad B.G. is finally pissed off. He said they are superstars and the fun and games are over. Ah, they done called out Team 3D. He said the fans can kiss his ass.

[Commercial Break]

Jeremy Borash, the mark, was given instructions to find Sting. He could not find him. He's nowhere to be found.

2 -- LANCE HOYT & JIMMY RAVE (w/Christy Hemme) vs. ALEX SHELLEY & CHRIS SABIN

Sabin and Shelley are apparently the faces here. And Don West can't tell them apart. Sabin and Shelley started things off by working on Jimmy Rave. Hoyt then landed a knee to the back on Shelley, giving Rave and Hoyt control. Hemme wet her lips while Hoyt worked on Shelley. Shelley then regained control and tagged out to Sabin, who ran around the ring on the heels. He hit a springboard clothesline on Rave for a nearfall. The action broke down as the fans started their 18th chant of the match. Rave then slapped on a double submission hold in center ring, but he couldn't maintain the hold on two men. Rave was cleared from the ring, then Sabin and Shelley double-teamed Hoyt with an enziguiri kick combo to score a pin on Hoyt.

After the match, Hemme and Hoyt argued, then Team 3D hit the ring and attacked Sabin and Shelley. Ray gave Shelley a piledriver, then Devon went for a table as they cut to break.

WINNERS: Shelley & Sabin in 7:00. Decent TV tag match, but Hoyt and Rave have the chemistry of Undertaker and Mark Henry in a PPV main event. Too bad Shelley and Sabin couldn't go one night without being beaten up by a larger tag team that spent significant time on WWE TV. (*)

[Commercial Break]

Team 3D was setting up a table in center ring as they returned to the action. Shark Boy tried to make a save, but he was quickly thwarted. Ray then put Shelley through Sabin and a table with a top rope powerbomb. They ripped off Shark Boy's neckbrace, then hit a conchairto to the neck, allowing Tenay to give us an anatomy lesson on the neck region.

Borash was in Sting's usual interview location, but still no sign of Sting. No answer yet.

Ringside, Tenay and West ignored Borash and plugged the two-hour switch next week. West, of course, told us to check out Playboy with Leticia on the cover. They cut to another shot of Tenay and West plugging the Bound for Glory PPV.

Four of the five knockouts and their male partners came out for a five-way divas match. The male partners are in the fight for your right match at the PPV.

[Commercial Break]

Gail Kim rounded out the five participants and she was accompanied by Chris Harris.

3 -- MS. BROOKS (w/Robert Roode) vs. MS. JACKIE MOORE (w/James Storm) vs. ROXXI LEVEAUX (w/VKM) vs. CHRISTY HEMME (w/Lance Hoyt and Jimmy Rave) vs. GAIL KIM (w/Chris Harris)

Winner of the match earns the final spot in the gauntlet match for the Women's Title at the PPV. Roxxi walked around the ring as if she were blindfolded, and Gail worked on all the divas. Christy then missed with what West called a flying fire crotch guillotine legdrop from the top rope. They blew a spot as Tenay said the TNA knockouts are head-and-shoulders above the competition in the ring. Suddenly, they set up a five-way spot in the corner and Christy took the suplex out of the Tower of Doom spot. Roxxi then erratically tossed Brooks over the top rope to the floor and Brooks smacked her back on the edge of the ring apron. Roode and Harris then started fighting on the outside. Harris stumbled backward and bumped into Storm to spill his beer. Rave and Hoyt started brawling with the other three, then back to the divas. Gail hit a huracanrana on Roxxi, then Kip stepped into the ring and distracted Gail. That gave Roxxi the opening to drop Gail with a pumphandle slam for the win.

WINNER: Roxxi in 6:00. Not even the knockout matches are spared from outside interference in TNA. Good to see VKM is done with the fun and games to help their valet win a match instead of focusing on taking out tag teams like Team 3D is doing. Some encouraging moments in the match to show flashes of what a TNA women's division can be. (3/4*)

[Commercial Break]

They recapped some of the feuds going into the PPV, and two hours of TV starting next week.

They aired a video package on the foul stench of death surrounding this man's presence. He was born into wickedness and sin. His eyes are empty of humanity. Vengeance is his identity. He is pure, unadulterated hate. He is a being incapable of betrayal. He is death and hell follows with him. Impact quiz: was this a Judas Mesias or Dustin Rhodes promo? Text Judas or Dustin to TNA Mobile. Don't let Jeremy B. down.

They cut backstage where Mitchell, Judas, and Borash were waiting for Sting. He showed up by bumping the camera and dropping Judas into a mattress-like foam sheet. Judas quickly recovered and attacked Sting.

[Commercial Break]

Sting had regained control during the break. Sting landed a chair shot to the back as they brawled to the ringside area. Sting used a fire extinguisher to push Judas over the guardrail to the ringside area. Back in the ring, Sting avoided a dropkick and slapped on a Scorpion Deathlock. Suddenly, Kurt Angle stormed the ring and attacked Sting. Rhino then hit the ring to save Sting. Angle quickly took Rhino down, though, and landed right hand blows to the head. Karen Angle, who was arrested last week by guys wearing "Police" t-shirts and apparently got off scot-free, watched from the entrance ramp. Abyss then hit the ring and cleared the heels from the ring. He stood tall in the ring with Sting and Rhino trying to recover to their feet.

We welcome your 1-10 score and comments on this show for an "Impact Reax" feature in the Torch Feedback section of PWTorch.com. To contribute your thoughts on Impact, click here.

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