By Wade Keller, Torch editor

TNA IMPACT REPORT
AUGUST 24, 2006
ORLANDO, FLA. AT UNIVERSAL STUDIOS

-Jeremy Borash interviewed Brother Runt outside of the arena at the start of the show. He said Abyss screwed up by letting him live to fight another day. He challenged him to a 10,000 thumbtacks match next week. He headbutted a truck and ran away. The camera panned up and showed Raven sitting on top of the truck.

-A video aired hyping the Jeff Jarrett-Sting NWA Title rematch at Bound for Glory, with Jarrett demanding a "career vs. title" stip.

-The TNA Impact opening aired. If they lose Monty Brown, it will take away a really cool "roaring moment" in the opening when they remove him. Just for fun, they should replace it with Brother Runt roaring.

-Mike Tenay introduced the show quickly, then they went to the ring with Shane Douglas and a mic. He said, "TNA, I told you so!" He said he did take The Naturals right back to the top of the mountain. Douglas asked the crowd if it was time for them to win the TNA Tag Team Title. The crowd sorta cheered. He introduced then as "The Newly Franchised Champions." Tenay said they are in line for a shot at the belts.

1 -- THE NATURALS (Andy Douglas & Chase Stevens w/Shane Douglas) vs. THE PAPARAZZIS (Alex Shelley & Johnny Devine)

The Naturals got in a few seconds of offense, clearing the ring of the heels, and then they cut to a break.

[Commercial Break]

Devine was on offense after the break. They finally got around to mentioning the TV main event ten minutes into the show - the tag title match. It's really crazy how they book the opening minutes of the show; it's as if they want to run off their TUF lead-in audience by giving them no reason to stay. Shelley, though, dropkicked Douglas out from under Devine who hooked the legs for a pin out of nowhere. Douglas chewed out The Naturals again. He said no title shot for them because they're not championship level wrestlers.

WINNERS: Shelley & Devine in 6:00.

STAR RATING: 3/4*

-Borash interviewed America's Most Wanted and Gail Kim, asking if the magic is gone. Harris yanked a beer out of Storm's hands. Harris asked Borash if he sees eye to with his brother on everything. Borash said no. Harris said that's all that's going on now with them. He then turned to Storm and told him to cut the crap and remember the good times and get back on the same page. He said he won't settle for being at the bottom of the barrel. Storm handed him a beer and said he heard him.

[Commercial Break]

-A commercial aired for Bound for Glory, hyping it as the single biggest PPV of all time. There is a September PPV (on the 22nd) called No Surrender, but they're hyping B4G first presumably in part to help ticket sales in Detroit for the time being.

-A vignette aired recapping Christian turning on Sting and clips of his explanations for it.

-Christian came out to a full ring intro, then sat in mid-ring on a chair. He said Sting lied to each of the fans when he said he'd be standing there with the NWA Title. He said although Sting claims he's a man of faith and a man of God, when it comes to TNA's wrestlers, management, and fans, who all hang on every word he says, "I am God!" West screamed, "How sacrilegious can you get?!" Rhino charged out to the ring. He told Christian all he's been doing is talk, talk, talk and he's sick of it. He said he wants an answer. Christian said he has been meaning to talk to him. Christian made light of Rhino's friendship with Sting by reminding him that he, Christian, was the one who was actually there for him during tough times including the time when they were overseas and his wife called and threatened to move with his daughter to Germany. He said, though, since he's going to take Sting's side over his, they're at a crossroads. He handed him a chair and said he's going to turn his back and let him "do what's he gotta do." Tenay asked if he wants to lower himself to Rhino's level. Rhino looked to the crowd, and received cheers and a chant of "Do it!" Christian asked if it's about Sting, or if he's jealous because he lives in a bigger house and drives a nicer car or became a bigger star than him. He said despite it all, he still loved him, so he said if he's going to hit him, hit him. Rhino yanked him around to facing him. West said a part of Rhino wants to level him. Rhino threw the chair down to a mix of cheers and boos. He said he's the only one around there with a set of balls. Rhino said, "No, you're wrong. I don't need a chair to kick your ass." He attacked Christian. When he went for a Gore, though, Christian held up the chair and threw it at Rhino's face to stop him. Rhino came up bleeding. Christian hit him in the face again. He set Rhino face-down on a chair, then smashed the back of his head with another chair. "What in the world is he trying to prove here?" asked West.

[Commercial Break]

-Footage aired of the Earl Hebner-Larry Zbyszko angle with Slick Johnson accusing Zbyszko of a conspiracy with Jarrett and Hebner. Borash then interviewed Zbyszko backstage. He said Hebner flipped out and is crazy. He denied any involvement in any conspiracy. Borash asked Zbyszko for his opinion on why Hebner was fired. Eric Young literally popped up and said he heard about someone being fired and wanted to know if it were him. Zbyszko said next week he has to wrestle and Jim Cornette told him if he loses that match, he might as well pack his bags. He said if it was up to him, he'd fire him today. Zbyszko stormed off. Young looked at Borash and said: "His hair is so majestic. Is he mad at me?"

2 -- ABYSS vs. CASSIDY O'REILLY

James Mitchell joined West and Tenay on commentary. He said Raven has been telepathically poisoning Runt's mind, which explains why he challenged Abyss to a thumb tacks match. Abyss tossed O'Reilly over his head. Mitchell poured thumb tacks onto the announcers' table. Abyss clotheslined O'Reilly in the corner. Mitchell called for the Doomsday. Abyss then hit the Black Hole Slam. Abyss slammed his fist into thumb tacks and then lifted his hand revealing a half-dozen stuck through his skin. Sick.

WINNER: Abyss in 1:00.

STAR RATING: n/a -- Just a three move squash match.

[Commercial Break]

-A segment aired with Sting saying that he'll accept his offer and put his career on the line and walk away from wrestling if he can't beat him. "If this is the end of Sting, so be it," he said. The production values of the announcement were really good. Sting said he's going to go away for a while, and he can't even comprehend where he's going. He said there's only one signature missing on the contract, "and it's not mine."

-They showed Tenay and West at ringside holding a contract that Sting signed for Bound for Glory. Out came Jeff Jarrett. He said the only thing left is for him to sign the contract. Jarrett held up the contract and said he'd publicly execute the contract next week. Tenay wanted to know why he didn't just sign the contract. West said he's devious and there's nothing he won't do to prove his point.

-A video aired promoting the tag team main event. Something along these lines should have opened the show, not a promo with Brother Runt in a parking lot. I just don't get TNA's strategic choices sometimes.

3 -- A.J. STYLES & CHRISTOPHER DANIELS vs. LAX (Homicide & Hernandez w/Konnan) -- TNA Tag Team Title match

Styles & Daniels came out in street clothes, which for Daniels was dress pants and a dress shirt. He doesn't own jeans, apparently. Styles wore jeans and a sleevless t-shirt. They brawled around ringside to start. Daniels leaped onto Hernandez over the announcers' table. The crowd chanted "TNA, TNA."

[Commercial Break]

Styles and Daniels remained on offense, a sure signal of a pending loss. Styles and Daniels both bled early from their foreheads. Hernandez took over on Daniels in the ring and scored a two count. Styles was KO'd at ringside as Homicide went after Daniels in the ring. Daniels came back using a chair as a weapon. Hernandez, though, dropped Daniel's head-first over the chair. Homicide pounded away at Daniels's head. Hernandez slid a table into the ring. Styles eventually made a spirited comeback and knocked Hernandez out of the ring. Styles then flipped over the top rope onto him. Daniels climbed to the top rope. Homicide punched him at the top and set up the table, then set up a suplex. Daniels set up an Angel's Wings, but Konnan hit him. Hernandez then leaped off the top rope and drove Daniels through a table and pinned him.

WINNERS: LAX in 12:00 to capture the tag titles.

STAR RATING: **3/4 -- A level above what's usually offered by TNA TV brawls. It felt rushed and the commercial break was typically annoying.

We welcome your 1-10 score and comments on this show for a "TNA Reax" feature in the Torch Feedback section of PWTorch.com. To contribute your thoughts on Impact, click here.

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