TV REPORTS KELLER'S SMACKDOWN REPORT 8/25: Ongoing "virtual time" analysis of broadcast
Aug 26, 2005 - 1:00:00 AM
PLEASE TAKE A MOMENT TO BOOKMARK US & VISIT US DAILY
By Wade Keller, Torch editor
AUGUST 25, 2005
TAPED TUESDAY IN GREENSBORO, N.C.
-The show opened with clips of the Smackdown matches at Summerslam. The clips went by too fast to really put in perspective everything that happened, but did create a sense of "I can't believe I missed all that" for viewers who didn't order it. Then they went right to the ring where "Cowboy" Bob Orton introduced his son. He said he is a "proud papa.," He said his son made him proud by destroying the legend of the Undertaker.
1 -- RANDY ORTON (w/Bob Orton) vs. HARDCORE HOLLY
Michael Cole and Tazz introduced the show was Orton walked to the ring. Cole said, "There is no one tougher than Hardcore Holly in the Smackdown locker room." If that's the case, why doesn't he win many matches? Why isn't he a title holder or at least a top contender? Or is toughness not a prerequisite to being successful in WWE? From a storyline perspective, it makes no sense to put Holly, at best a mid-carder, over as the toughest guy in the locker room. Undertaker's not tougher than him, from a storyline perspective? Nor Batista? Or JBL? Or Benoit? It was a battle of headlocks early with Orton and then Holly applying the unimaginative, uninteresting hold, but both did so with more intensity than is typical, making it watchable. I still think anytime wrestlers settle into headlocks, especially for the first four minutes of a TV match with no other build-up, they're going to lose a lot of viewers to remote flipping. At 5:30 Orton threw Holly out of the ring. Holly quickly returned to the ring only to be met by Orton's beautiful high dropkick and a kneedrop. At 8:45 Holly scored a near fall after a full nelson slam. He followed up by going to the top rope and hit Orton with a flying clothesline for another near fall. Holly went into a series of stiff chops to Orton's chest. He then signalled for the Alabama Slam, but Bob got on the ring apron to distract Holly. Orton then caught Holly with an RKO attempt. Holly escaped and hit Orton with a dropkick for a two count. The crowd was into the near fall. Orton tripped Holly coming off the ropes. As Holly yelled at Bob, Orton surprised Holly with an RKO for the win.
WINNER: Orton at 10:31.
STAR RATING: **1/2 -- Good TV match. The opening few minutes were slow, but intense enough not to feel like stalling or time-filling. The final few minutes were well executed. Nothing fancy, but everything they did felt strong, not nonchalant. Holly looked a little silly falling for the Orton distraction twice and not realizing another blindside RKO attempt was probably heading toward him.
-A new character, a "network executive" named Palmer Cannon introduced himself to Teddy Long backstage. He said it was an honor to meet him and asked what he could do for him. He then interrupted Long and said he came up for a huge main event for the inaugural Friday night Smackdown. Long seemed taken aback that someone else was coming up with matches. He did agree, though, that Tanner's idea for JBL vs. Batista was a good idea.
-Cole and Tazz plugged the six-man tag main event.
-The Peep Show with Christian: Christian interviewed Booker T and Sharmell. Christian then tried to stir trouble between Booker and Sharmell by showing a clip of Sharmell getting beat up by Melina last week. He said Booker is in serious contention for the Ike Turner/Tommy Lee "Husband of the Year" award. He told Booker that he has great credentials as a five-time WCW Champion, but he asked what he's done in the last few years of note. Sharmell said it was a pretty good question. He said he beat the hell out of Kurt Angle for putting his hands on her. He objected to her putting any credibility behind what Christian said. She said she's a beauty queen and a former Miss Black America and she doesn't belong in the ring. She said he is a champion and he needs to start remembering who he really is. He said, "I'll tell you who I am. I'm the five-time, five-time..." That was interrupted by the Mexicools. Christian attacked them, but was soon overwhelmed. When Sharmell was knocked over, Booker helped her up. Booker then beat up the Mexicools. Booker and Christian cleared the ring, then gave each other a look of having just formed an unlikely, uneasy alliance.
-Tazz and Cole thanked fans who ordered Summerslam.
2 -- HEIDENREICH (w/Animal) vs. MERCURY (w/Nitro, Melina)
Jillian Hall introduced MNM and showed off that they are on the cover of the latest Smackdown magazine. Cole said Animal has had a calming influence on Heidenreich. Passable action. As the ref was distracted by Jillian, Melina, and Animal arguing, Nitro hit the back of Heidenreich's knee with a chair. The ref turned in time to see it and called for the bell. Nitro also dropkicked Animal in the face when he entered the ring.
WINNER: Heidenreich via DQ after a chairshot by Nitro at 2:53.
STAR RATING: 1/2*
-Cole announced that Long had just booked Booker & Christian vs. The Mexicools.
-The Raw Rebound aired.
-Josh Matthews interviewed Chris Benoit backstage. He was going to go to footage of Benoit making Jordan tapout in 25 seconds. He said that made him wonder what else he could do in 25 seconds. He asked them to run a match while made himself a cup of coffee. They aired the match on the split screen from start to finish. Meanwhile, Benoit whistled and prepared himself a cup of coffee including with one sugar. He stirred it and took a sip before the match ended. He then laughed.
-JBL chewed out Orlando Jordan backstage. "I need you!" said JBL. He said in two weeks he'll have recovered from the powerbomb on the steps and regain his title. "Tonight I've got to have you. I need you for longer than twenty-five-and-a-half seconds!" JBL shouted. "I suggest you put your kneepads on now because I need you!" Did viewers just learn a lot about their relationship?
3 -- THE MEXICOOLS (w/Juventud) vs. BOOKER T & CHRISTIAN
Christian took a beating for several minutes and got a bloody nose, then hot-tagged Booker at 4:15. Booker took out both Crazy and Psicosis. Juvi held onto Booker from behind, giving the Mexicools a chance to beat on Booker. When Christian was going to enter the ring, Sharmell yelled at him for not helping sooner. It worked against Booker since Christian stopped in his tracks, took the tongue-lashing from Sharmell, and then walked to the back leaving Booker alone. The triple-teaming from the Mexicools led to Booker getting pinned after a double back suplex. Sharmell and Booker argued afterward.
WINNERS: Super Crazy & Psicosis at 5:32.
STAR RATING: *
-Bob and Randy Orton were interviewed backstage. Orton said Undertaker is Dead.
-The TV exec told Long he is loving tonight's broadcast. He said he wants to see more of Randy Orton on Smackdown. Long said Undertaker is full of surprises. Long tried to leave so he could make a major announcement. The TV exec said he wanted to know early. Long said he'd find out when everyone else did.
-From center-ring, Teddy Long introduced new Smackdown acquisitions Stacy and Christy Hemme and said they'd be having a "lingerie pillow fight." Cole said, "I'd heard rumors of a big trade!" How bad does that sound? He heard rumors? It was announced on Raw and posted on WWE.com! Stacy walked out first, then Christy Hemme. Tazz said he loves the Smackdown G.M. Cole said he loves Christy. Just as they were about to disrobe, the "network executive" interrupted and said the demographic they are trying to attract doesn't want to see a lingerie pillow fight, therefore he was cancelling the match. This gimmick is dangerous. It's intentionally frustrating the audience.
4 -- MR. KEN KENNEDY vs. FUNAKI
Kennedy, a cross between Fit Finlay and Billy Gunn, didn't like the job the ring announcer did, so he scooted him out of the ring and handled introductions himself. He ripped on Funaki for not speaking "a lick of English," and complained about him somehow being classified as Smackdown's no. 1 announcer. That should upset Michael Cole or Josh Matthews, not him. He then introduced himself and called it the biggest announcement ever on Smackdown. He sounds like Billy Gunn. Tazz said he officially likes this guy. Cole said he's a bit cocky. Kennedy won with a top rope tuck and roll slam which Tazz described as an inverted Samoan drop.
WINNER: Kennedy at 3:08.
STAR RATING: 1/2*
-Another spot ran advertising the timeslot change in two weeks for Smackdown.
5 -- JBL & ORLANDO JORDAN & EDDIE GUERRERO vs. REY MYSTERIO
& BATISTA & CHRIS BENOIT
The six full ring introductions took a while. Cole and Tazz talked about happenings at Summerslam involving each of the wrestlers. Eddie had his left arm taped and limped his way to the ring. Jordan began by going after Benoit. The crowd chanted "You Tapped Out" at Jordan. When Benoit went for an early Crossface, Jordan bailed out of hte ring and they cut to a break.
Batista tagged in against JBL and cleaned house as all the heels jumped in. Eventually the heels took control of the match with Benoit in the ring. Cole pointed out that JBL guaranteed he'd win, but he didn't. JBL tagged in Guerrero who went for a quick pin attempt on Benoit, then applied an abdominal stretch. Benoit took a beating for several minutes, then Batista got a hot tag at 14:30. Six-way chaos broke out. Eventually Batista clotheslined JBL over the top rope and then Rey gave Orlando the 619, Benoit gave him a German suplex, and Batista gave him the Batista Bomb for the win. Cole called Batista, Mysterio, and Benoit a "dream team."
WINNER; Batista & Mysterio & Benoit when Batista pinned Jordan at 16:15.
STAR RATING: **1/2 -- Good six-man tag main event.
-You can tell there is no PPV around the corner for Smackdown because in general, and specifically the main event, didn't even hint at planting seeds of new feuds. They're going to stretch out the Batista-JBL feud another two weeks until their season premiere on Friday night.
We welcome your 1-10 score and comments on this show. To contribute your thoughts on Smackdown, click here.
THE TORCH REACHES MORE COMBAT ENTERTAINMENT FANS THAN ANY OTHER SOURCE
PWTorch editor Wade Keller has covered pro wrestling full time since 1987 starting with the Pro Wrestling Torch print newsletter. PWTorch.com launched in 1999 and the PWTorch Apps launched in 2008.
He has conducted "Torch Talk" insider interviews with Hulk Hogan, The Rock, Steve Austin, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, Eric Bischoff, Jesse Ventura, Lou Thesz, Jerry Lawler, Mick Foley, Jim Ross, Paul Heyman, Bruno Sammartino, Goldberg, more.
He has interviewed big-name players in person incluiding Vince McMahon (at WWE Headquarters), Dana White (in Las Vegas), Eric Bischoff (at the first Nitro at Mall of America), Brock Lesnar (after his first UFC win).
He hosted the weekly Pro Wrestling Focus radio show on KFAN in the early 1990s and hosted the Ultimate Insiders DVD series distributed in retail stories internationally in the mid-2000s including interviews filmed in Los Angeles with Vince Russo & Ed Ferrara and Matt & Jeff Hardy. He currently hosts the most listened to pro wrestling audio show in the world, (the PWTorch Livecast, top ranked in iTunes)
REACHING 1 MILLION+ UNIQUE USERS PER MONTH
500 MILLION CLICKS & LISTENS PER YEAR
MILLIONS OF PWTORCH NEWSLETTERS SOLD
PWTorch offers a VIP membership for $10 a month (or less with an annual sub). It includes nearly 25 years worth of archives from our coverage of pro wrestling dating back to PWTorch Newsletters from the late-'80s filled with insider secrets from every era that are available to VIPers in digital PDF format and Keller's radio show from the early 1990s.
Also, new exclusive top-shelf content every day including a new VIP-exclusive weekly 16 page digital magazine-style (PC and iPad compatible) PDF newsletter packed with exclusive articles and news.
The following features come with a VIP membership which tens of thousands of fans worldwide have enjoyed for many years...
-New Digital PWTorch Newsletter every week
-3 New Digital PDF Back Issues from 5, 10, 20 years ago
-Over 60 new VIP Audio Shows each week
-Ad-free access to all PWTorch.com free articles
-VIP Forum access with daily interaction with PWTorch staff and well-informed fellow wrestling fans
-Tons of archived audio and text articles
-Decades of Torch Talk insider interviews in transcript and audio formats with big name stars. **SIGN UP FOR VIP ACCESS HERE**