Hulkamania Tour house show report
November 28, 2009
Sydney, Australia at Acer Arena
Report by Peter Rice, Torch reader

The arena is layered in three tiers, with the top tier curtained off, but probably 85-90 percent full on the bottom two tiers. There were probably about 7,000-9,000 people present and the crowd was extremely cold up until the final two matches. And it was easy to see why in some parts.

(1) The Pimp Fatha defeated Sean Morley (Val Venis) in 5:00. Sean Morley entered the ring and carried on with his towel routine for about five minutes, keeping the towel in the ring to generate boos from the crowd. In comes The Pimp Fatha with four of the most uninterested, bored-looking hos ever to walk the ramp. Fatha offered the Hos to Sean for free if he wins the match, but for triple the cost if Morley loses. Sean agreed. It was a slow, plodding match ending after five minutes or so.

(2) Nasty Boys (Brian Knobs & Jerry Sags w/Jimmy Hart) vs. Rock of Love went to a Double Count-out. Rock of Love entered the ring and cut a small promo. A video showed Jimmy and the Nasty Boys coming out, then the Nasty Boys entered the ring. Rock of Love hit them with powder in the eyes, then threw them out. They brawled up the ramp towards the back and they were counted out. That was quick.

(3) Heidenreich defeated Nick Dinsmore (Eugen) in 8:00. Dinsmore was announced as Heidenreich's opponent, but Vampire Warrior's face and name were put up on the screen. Oops no. 1. Nick was reasonably over with the crowd. After back and forth action, Dinsmore gave Heidenreich a Rock Bottom, and signaled a Peoples Elbow, but Heidenreich caught him and put him away. Boos for Heidenreich.

(4) Black Pearl & Vampire Warrior defeated Brian Christopher & and Junior Fatu (Rikishi) in 10:00. Vampire Warrior had a good entrance, with suitable music and a credible gimmick. Standard sort of action until the very end, where Christopher suddenly lost all cohesion. Oops no. 2. I thought maybe he took a head knock, but I didn't see it. He missed a jump onto the second rope, then missed another move, then was thrown for an Irish whip into the ropes, but suddenly stopped before touching the ropes. He turned around and was put away by Black Pearl. Embarrassing ending for him, and the match. Afterwards, Junior Fatu knocked down The Pearl and stinkfaced him. Christopher, Junior, and the referee all did a dance in the middle of the ring.

(5) Nasty Boys (Brian Knobs & Jerry Sags w/Jimmy Hart) beat Rock of Love in 10:00. Suddenly, Rock of Love and The Nasty Boys reappeared at the top of the ramp with Jimmy Hart dragging a referee in tow. We have a hardcore-type match. They used empty large water bottles, chairs, a plywood sheet, cookie sheets, and more to various degrees. This was a bit more fun to watch, and the crowd started to get into it a bit more. One of the Rock of Love members had a small cut under the eye. After about ten minutes of pretty good action, Nasty Boys got the pin. I had never seen a semi-hardcore match live, and was impressed with the effort.

[20 minute intermission]

A five-minute bikini competition was straight after the intermission, with Stephanie Pietz, Koa Marie Turner, and Kiara Dillon involved. I can't remember who won, but the losers were jealous of the winner, and a catfight started. The referee got into an interesting position rolling around with the ladies. Next.

(6) Spartan 3000 (Matt Cross) defeated Shannon Moore in 15 minutes in a ladder match with $25,000 in a briefcase suspended above the ring. Another slow match, with a lot of positioning of ladders. Very quiet crowd for the most part. However the spot of the night was when Spartan 3000 reverse-somersaulted off the top rope onto a ladder that was covering a prone Shannon Moore in the ring. Shannon however, threw the ladder up striking Spartan 3000 on the way down. Dangerous looking move and looked great live. The crowd was very appreciative. They followed with some high falls off ladders, including a Shannon Moore leg drop leapfrogging a ladder off the top rope onto Spartan. Slow, but acceptable ladder match.

(7) Brutus "the Barber" Beefcake defeated Orlando Jordan in 6:00. Brutus was very slow in the ring, and the crowd was not into it at all. Brutus's tights split in an embarrassing place, which was picked up by the cameraman. Oops no 3. Brutus slapped on his sleeper hold, and Orlando was out for the count. Beefcake cut off about three inches of his dreadlocks, and Jordan had the usual reaction when he woke up.

(8) Uso (Umaga) defeated Ken Anderson (Mr. Kennedy) in 15:00. With talent like this, they put on a much better show than earlier on the card, and the crowd was much more into it. Ken Anderson did his mic work, then Umaga entered. Back and forth between these two, followed by a standard ref bump, Anderson covers for long enough, then a second referee runs out, counts two, then Uso kicks out. After another five minutes, Uso executed three quick high impact moves including a Samoan Spike, and Anderson was defeated. Much better.

(9) Hulk Hogan defeated Ric Flair in 20:00 in a No DQ match. Both wrestlers received huge ovations here and rightly so. It is such a shame that WWE own the rights to Flair's entrance theme. Both were very slow in the ring with lots of chops and clotheslines. Ric Flair entered with a lady in tow, and she got involved in the match. After about ten slow minutes, Flair targeted the cut on Hogan's head and Hogan started to bleed. Ric Flair's lady put Hogan in a sleeperhold when Hogan was on the floor, and she was covered in his blood. While adjusting her clothing, blood got all over her breasts, which was picked up by the camera. Heidenreich ran in and attacked Hogan, and the Nasty Boys ran in to assist Hogan. Hogan then attacked Flair's forehead, and he was also cut open. Both end up covered in blood. Flair did a mule kick, and the referee was also caught by it. Flair and his lady then both received a Meeting of the Minds from Hogan. That was probably unnecessary. In came Uso to assist Flair. Hogan hulked up and threw out Uso. An Irish whip and Flair drops to the Big Boot. Jimmy Hart threw in the megaphone, Hogan waffled Flair with it, and that's all she wrote. Flair was assisted up the ramp by Uso and his lady, then Hogan posed for the fans and pretended to walk out due to limited reaction. Jimmy Hart convinced him to stay, Hulk posed for another five minutes, then he walked up the ramp and left. Loud cheers for Hogan all night.

Overall, a very slow first two hours with a dead crowd for most of it. The final hour was much better. It was great to see Hogan and Flair live, and that was of course what it was all about. But I doubt Hogan will be wrestling in TNA at all. Just a drop in the ticket prices and the night would have been worth it. To charge full WWE tour ticket prices for an event like this was way over the top.

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