SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
The following report originally published 20 years ago this week here at PWTorch.com…
WWE RAW REPORT
SEPTEMBER 13, 2004
LIVE ON SPIKE TV FROM SEATTLE, WASH.
-Ric Flair stood center ring surrounded by a beautiful women and introduced Triple H. Hunter walked out amidst much fanfare similar to the end of the major political conventions with glitter falling from the rafters. He announced to the crowd that he was once again World Heavyweight Champion. He said it was just three weeks ago that Randy Orton spit in his face. He said he has a big, nasty loogie saved up for Orton. He said it was time to party like a champion. He then looked at the cake in center ring and said there must be something special inside. Flair said it was “the big guy” who got it because he didn’t. Hunter turned to Batista, but Batista said it wasn’t him.
Hunter said it must’ve been Eric Bischoff. He asked everyone to gather around because he knows “this girl (inside the cake) is ready to play the game.” Randy Orton burst out of the cake and dove at Hunter. He beat up Batista, Flair, and Hunter, who slipped on the glitter confetti inside the ring. Orton nailed Hunter with the title belt and knocked Hunter head-first into the cage contraption. He then held up the gold belt as Hunter’s legs flailed in the air. I can’t believe as much of the crowd popped for that as it did since it seemed about as obvious as anything WWE has done in years that Orton was popping out of that cake, not a woman.
[Commercial Break]
-They replayed the cake angle.
-An enraged Triple H covered in frosting told Raw G.M. Eric Bischoff he wanted revenge tonight. Bischoff said he would not just give Hunter to Orton, he would give all of Evolution to Orton. He booked a three-on-one match for later.
1 — CHRIS BENOIT vs. ROBERT CONWAY (w/Sylvain Conway)
Benoit was introduced as “residing in Atlanta, Georgia.” Ross couldn’t believe what Bischoff just did, booking Orton against three people. William Regal walked to the ring to accompany Benoit to offset the presence of Grenier. Benoit and Conway fought a relatively even, back-and-forth match. Grenier grabbed Conway’s hand to stop a sunset flip attempt by Benoit. Benoit eventually hit his three unreleased German suplexes and then shifted into a Crippler Crossface for the win.
WINNER: Benoit via submission at 8:27.
STAR RATING: *3/4 — Good TV match.
-A commercial ran announcing that Mick Foley and John Bradshaw Layfield would square off in a debate at the University of Miami on Wednesday, Sept. 29.
[Commercial Break]
-A vignette aired hyping the return of Shelton Benjamin.
-Ross and Lawler announced the on sale date for Taboo Tuesday. Lawler said it was a Tuesday pay-per-view.
-Stacy Keibler entered the ring to introduce the Raw Diva Candidates for the “Seattle Slugfest.” Molly Holly interrupted. She said it’s pathetic that all of these non-wrestling women have been getting all of the attention. She said those women can have a “slutfest, uh, I mean slugfest later,” then challenged Stacy at a contest of her choice. Stacy thought about it for a second, then said she wanted to have a dance off. Molly said, “Is that supposed to scare me? Try eight years of ballet lessons.”
Molly volunteered to go first, then asked for some classy music to play, such as William Regal’s music. Stacy danced like she was in sexy MTV music video. Molly attacked Stacy from behind and ripped at her face. Nidia then attacked Molly from behind. Stacy then shoved her boot into Molly’s throat. Gail Kim then ran out and attacked Nidia. Victoria ran out and dropped Kim throat-first over the top rope. Trish Stratus then ran out and went after Victoria. Bischoff appeared on the big screen and announced a six-woman match would start right then.
[Commercial Break]
2 — STACY & NIDIA & VICTORIA vs. GAIL KIM & TRISH STRATUS & MOLLY HOLLY
Molly hit a handspring elbow in the corner, but as she celebrated, Stacy tagged in and schoolgirled Molly for a quick three count.
WINNERS: Stacy & Nidia & Victoria in an est. 4:30 (match began during commercial)
STAR RATING: 1/2*
-Kane burst into Eric Bischoff’s office. Kane said he didn’t sleep at all last night because his “bitch wife” cost him his match against Shawn Michaels. Bischoff said Michaels is scheduled to be on Highlight Reel later, but he’d give him Michaels any other night. They could announce he’d be on Heat, then tape the match after Raw went off the air (since it’s early on the West Coast, the crowd would stay) and make an effort to boost the ratings of Heat. He said the match could have any stip he wanted. Kane liked. Ross called Bischoff spineless for acquiescing to Kane.
-Ross and Lawler plugged the Highlight Reel was up next.
[Commercial Break]
-Chris Jericho came out to his full ring entrance. He said it was a rough night getting banged up in the ladder match, but it was all worth it because he ended up IC Champion. He then introduced Michaels. Michaels said it was a gratifying win to beat Kane. Jericho said it wasn’t as gratifying as becoming IC Champ for the seventh time. Michaels said he can’t disagree with that. He said that’s why he came out there. He told Jericho that they have wrestled many times, but they never settled the score. He suggested they wrestle one more time to break the tie for the IC Championship.
Before Jericho could respond, Christian and Tyson Tomko walked out. Christian said seeing Michaels out there reminded him of a story of someone who started as a tag team specialist, then he won a ladder match, got himself a bodyguard, and moved on to become one of the greatest of all time. He said he wasn’t talking about Michaels, but rather himself. Christian said win or lose, last night he proved he was the greatest ladder match wrestler of all-time. He said he deserved the IC Title shot, not Michaels. Michaels said he could have that shot as soon as he beats him.
Jericho said he knows exactly how Christian works. He said the Jerichoholics know what will happen. He then walked to ringside and pointed to fans in the front row one after another, saying aloud what he knew they were thinking, which is that Michaels would win if not for Tomko’s interference. He said what the fans really want to see is Jericho & Michaels vs. Tomko & Christian “right here, right now in Seattle.”
Tomko accepted, even though Christian seemed a bit reluctant. Good segment. I liked Jericho going to ringside and interacting with the fans. That’ll sell front row tickets for years to come as fans watching on TV hope they get that brief moment of fame. There only downside is they teased an arguably more attractive match – Michaels vs. Jericho for the IC Title – and ended up with a tag match instead.
[Commercial Break]
3 — SHAWN MICHAELS & CHRIS JERICHO vs. TYSON TOMKO & CHRISTIAN
Michaels took a beating early in the match, but hot-tagged in Jericho at 5:00. Jericho went to work on Jericho and Tomko, knocking both to ringside. Michaels recovered quickly and joined Jericho in stereo plancha dives onto both heels at ringside.
[Commercial Break]
It was Jericho’s turn to take a sustained beating. He finally hot-tagged Michaels at 12:00 who went to work on both heels. He hit Tomko with a top rope elbowdrop, then he signalled for the Sweet Chin Music. Christian yanked Michaels’ feet out from under him and then pulled him crotch-first into the ringpost. Christian then grabbed the IC belt and threatened to use it as a weapon. Jericho speared it out of Christian’s hands. Michaels then nailed Tomko with a superkick for the three count. Afterward, Christian shoved Michaels to the floor and gave him his Unprettier finisher at ringside. Christian and Tomko retreated as Jericho tended to the fallen Michaels.
WINNERS: Michaels & Jericho at 13:55.
STAR RATING: ** — Pretty formulaic, but the bursts of babyface energy after the two big hot tags were well done and effective.
[Commercial Break]
-Coach hosted the Raw Diva Candidate segment. He announced that Joy had been voted off. No surprise. The word as of last week within WWE is that based on internal voting each week recently, Christy will ultimately win (which I talked about in last week’s Keller VIP Audio Update along with a lot more backstage diva news). Coach then announced that Christy and Carmella must box. He had them put on ridiculously oversized boxing gloves – hilariously oversized, like bigger than two of Brock Lesnar’s heads.
Before the “fight” could start, Vince McMahon walked out. He power walked to the ring in an exaggerated fashion that is unprecedented. He announced that next week would be the “season premier” of Raw (which is always silly-sounding for a show that has no seasons and is live and new each week). He said there would be a major announcement that would affect everyone one of the fans. He said he had one more announcement – that the rules to the boxing match would be different than Coach thought. He said Coach would be the target of the punches. He ordered Coach to hold his hands behind his back and not to budge an inch. The referee told them not to hit below the belt “unless absolutely necessary.”
Joy was up first. She punched him in the head a couple of times, then rubbed his crotch and punched it. Then she jumped on his back. They both tumbled to the ground. Joy could have hurt herself on that landing with those awkward gloves. Then she bit his ass. Carmella was up next and she took a series of shots at Coach and knocked him down early. His hands came out from behind his back. He kept trying to get up, but he kept falling.
The crowd responded with a mix of cheers and boos. The ref asked the crowd who won. They popped for Christy and booed Carmella. The ref declared Christy the winner. Ross next week they’d find out who the Raw Diva Competition winner would be. A battered and somewhat breathless Coach announced the numbers for the final vote. He either sold really well or those shots actually hurt a bit.
[Commercial Break]
4 — KANE vs. GENE SNITSKY
Bischoff selected a wrestler to get squashed by Kane. Lawler gave Ross a hard time for not knowing more about Snitsky, who looked like that long forgotten wrestler “Mean” Mark Callous from WCW in the early-’90s. Kane put Snitsky’s head in a chair. The ref tried to stop him, but Kane scared him out of the ring. When Kane climbed to the top rope, a pregnant Lita stepped into the ring and pulled the chair away. Kane jumped to the mat and got in her face.
Snitsky hit Kane from behind with a chair and Kane landed hard on Lita’s stomach. She grabbed her belly in pain. Kane looked worried as the ref called for help from the back. Lita asked if she was bleeding. Dean Malenko was among the officials who ran to ringside to tend to her. EMTs then came to the ring and put her in a neck brace. Well, it looks like Lita may not be going to full term afterall. If she loses the baby, she won’t have to walk around with a fake belly for the next six months. It’s always a touchy subject to deal with a miscarriage, so if WWE goes that direction with it, it should be interesting to see how they handle it.
WINNER: No decision.
[Commercial Break]
-They showed Lita being taken from the ring on a gurney. Then they went to the Smackdown recap. Then they went back live to Lita being loaded into an ambulance.
[Commercial Break]
5 — RANDY ORTON vs. TRIPLE H & BATISTA & RIC FLAIR
Orton held his own in one-on-one competition, then all three attacked him. The ref called for the DQ at 2:00. Then the three-on-one attack continued. Shelton Benjamin made a surprise save. Ross said he didn’t think he was returning for a few weeks. Benoit joined in. Orton gave an RKO to Batista. The babyfaces then stood their ground at ringside as Hunter and Flair tended to Batista in the ring. Ross said Hunter stole the belt from Hunter, but he considered after what they saw tonight that “it is Randy Orton’s destiny to be World Heavyweight Champion again.”
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