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KELLER’S AEW COLLISION REPORT
SEPTEMBER 2, 2023
CHICAGO, ILL.
AIRED LIVE ON TNT
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Nigel McGuinness
[HOUR ONE]
-The show opened with Tony Khan, with a grim expression, stating that he had to make “one of the toughest decisions of my professional career.” He said he “terminated Phil Brooks / C.M. Punk for cause.” He said it stemmed from a backstage incident at All In last Sunday that endangered workers backstage. He said he has never felt, until last Sunday, that his security, safety, and life was in danger at a wrestling show. He said a discipline committee in AEW and an outside legal counsel made a unanimous recommendation. He apologized to fans who were upset by the decision. He assured them a great Collision and All Out. He pivoted to talking about this being the greatest week in AEW history.
-A video package aired of All In narrated by Tony Schiavone. Images of C.M. Punk were absent, unlike the highlight package on Dynamite.
-The AEW Collision theme then played, also with Punk edited out. It began with images of The Acclaimed and was heavy on images of FTR, Miro, The Outcasts, Ricky Starks, Samoa Joe, and Jay White & Bullet Club Gold. Also, Darby, Willow Nightingale, Scorpio Sky, and a few others.
-Schiavone stood mid-ring and discussed Ricky Starks challenging Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat to a strap match at All Out. There was a faint “C.M. Punk” chant when Schiavone began speaking. Starks made his entrance, accompanied by Big Bill. Schiavone asked Starks if he’s “out of his freakin’ mind” by challenging a 70 year old man to a strap match. Starks yanked the mic away from Schiavone.
Starks said he finds himself back at square one. “It seems every time I climb a hill, I get dragged back down,” he said. “It seems every time they throw an obstacle my way, I overcome it and I get better. I am so tired of having to start over, but I do it because I show up and I deliver every single time. No matter how many people try to suck the life out of me, it doesn’t work.” He said you cannot put a lid on a boiling pot because he will overflow. He received scattered cheers. He told Bill at ringside that he overcame addiction and stands there now, so he believes in him. More cheers. He said he believes in himself. Fans chanted “Bill! Bill!” Starks said he’s tired and frustrated and there’s a lot he wanted to say and he wanted to cry but he’s being a man about it, so he’ll do what he needs to do.
(Keller’s Analysis: The start of this promo made no sense in any storyline context and seemed like it was best saved for a conversation with his therapist or best friend. Is he referring to his planned PPV match against Punk being scratched? He’s out there giving an inspiration speech about overcoming obstacles that fans are cheering him on for, but there’s no context given what he means and apparently an assumption everyone reads the internet and knows the plan was for Punk to be part of this Steamboat storyline tonight. From there, he got fans to start chanting the name of his heel sidekick. What is going on here?)
He then said he sat at home and watched All In from his living room couch. He angrily asked if there wasn’t time for him. He said it was because he whipped Ricky Steamboat. He said he won’t let another moment slip through his hands, which is why he was challenging Steamboat to a strap match at All Out. He said he hopes Steamboat will see things from his perspective some day and understands why he did what he did. He said he wanted Steamboat to answer him. Steamboat’s music played.
Steamboat marched to the ring with a stern look and a contract folder in hand. He paced and started: “You know something, ladies and gentleman, yes, I’m talking to you,” he said as he turned to Starks. He said Starks strapped him like a little dog with his own belt. (Can we stop talking about whipping dogs like that’s okay, but whipping humans isn’t? Who whips little dogs with belts, anyway?) He said he heard “on the social media” that he wants to have a strap match “with the Dragon.” He said Starks can talk a good game and he can perform in the ring when he really wants to, but he’s got a contract in hand. He said he went to AEW legal and said, “Let’s do it old school, draw up a contract, your name, the Dragon name on here, sign it, and make sure the pen talks and not the mouth.”
Schiavone opened the contract which said: “AEW Sanctioned – No DQ Strap Match – Ricky Starks vs. The Dragon.” Starks said, “Let’s do it!” He told Starks to let his mouth be the pen and sign it. Starks signed it with enthusiasm. Steamboat showed off Starks’s signature. He said everybody knows him as The Dragon, but “they also know this guy.” (He left off “…as the American Dragon.”) Danielson’s music played and he came out with his arms extended. Fans cheered and chanted “Yes!” Starks stood slack-jawed at being tricked. Danielson then signed the contract “The Dragon.” Fans chanted “You f—ed up!” Schiavone said they have themselves a strap match for All Out now. Starks said, “If this is the bed that I lay in, I’m going to make sure I’m really comfortable.” Steamboat said he got the strap match he wanted. Danielson stared at him and smiled.
(Keller’s Analysis: So the first half of Starks’s promo was totally incongruent with the second half. It didn’t kill the segment, but it didn’t help. Steamboat has always been an awkward promo and it was amplified here with some awkward syntax and distracting pacing. The segment would’ve been better with some extra run-throughs, probably, but it still worked with the crowd. I think Starks should’ve been throwing a fit at the end instead of reconciling what happened so quickly and acting ready and eager to face Danielson after all. That kinda pulled the rug out from under the whole point of the entire segment.)
-They went backstage to Jon Moxley cutting a promo under the rafters. He talked about facing Orange Cassidy, whom he said is the player no one can checkmate and who 31 challenges have failed to solve. He said some idiots call Cassidy a “cosplay wrestler.” He asked, “Okay, if that’s the case, who is he pretending to be? Have any of them become the winningest champion in pro wrestling? No, I don’t think so.” He said it’s been a long time coming. He referenced Cassidy beating him years ago by forfeit, and he said that’s all he’s going to get.
He said sometimes when the greats face each other, some win and some lose. He said what happens at All Out is an opportunity that only comes once in a lifetime because Cassidy is on a run of a lifetime. He said he can smell b.s. from a mile away and can smell the real deal from a mile away, and Cassidy looks to him like the real thing.
He said he is a technician of the highest order but he’s not going to target his knee, elbow, and arm. He said instead he’s going to target his soul, his heart, his guts, his conditioning, his endurance both mental and physical, his will to win and survive, his will to even be there. He said a lot of wrestlers want to be perceived as great wrestlers, but they don’t want to be great wrestlers.
He said once it gets hard, they look for a way out. He said that’s the only question for Cassidy is whether, when things get really hard, does he look for a way out. He said a lot of people believe in him. “This Sunday at All Out, don’t disappoint us,” he said.
(Keller’s Analysis: Put that in AEW Promo Class for everyone to learn from. That was so good. He put over his opponent, he said what he plans to do specifically as a tactic, and he talked about why this match is special for him and why the stakes are high. And he did so while being cool and confident and matter-of-fact. That’s top shelf promo work and one of Moxley’s best to date. All Out needed the Cassidy-Mox match to feel main event worthy, and this cemented it.)
(1) THE ACCLAIMED (Max Caster & Anthony Bowens) & BILLY GUNN vs. DANIEL GARCIA & MATT MENARD & ANGELO GARCIA (w/Jake Hager)
Caster rapped to the ring. He said Garcia danced every week because his matches and promos put everyone to sleep. He said Menard wanted a taste of his ball sack. He said Parker is so bad even Chris Jericho ditched him. The bell rang 20 minutes into the hour. Graphics hyped what was coming up later including “Dennis Rodman returns to United Center tonight.” (That was an anticlimactic way to reveal that to the national audience!) Garcia did his pelvic thrust routine against Gunn, so Gunn KO’d him. Garcia fell face-first into Gunn’s crotch, at which point Gunn gyrated his crotch against Garcia’s face. Hager at ringside helped the heels take control.
The heels triple-teamed Bowens including a leaping piledriver on Bowens and a dual DDT by Parker and Menard. Kelly (stupidly) said, “What a short reign for The Acclaimed.” (Does it really add drama to a match to make a ridiculous exaggerated overstatement like that a minute in when nobody believes the match is going to end? Does it help announcer credibility to say stuff like that? It’s insulting and tone-deaf.) Garcia put Bowens in a sharpshooter mid-ring. Bowens crawled over to the bottom rope to force a break. Hager knocked Bowens’ hands off the bottom rope (which the director nearly missed and only caught on a wide angle shot at the last second). Gunn broke up Garcia’s hold instead. They cut to a split-screen break three minutes in. [c/ss]
The heels beat on Bowens during the break. Caster got the hot-tag at 6:00 and went on a flurry of offense and scored a near fall on Garcia. The heels took over against Caster until he hot-tagged in Billy, who cleared the ring. A minute later, Caster dropped a top rope elbow on Menard for the win.
WINNER: Acclaimed & Billy in 9:00.
-Lexi Nair interviewed Dark Order’s John Silver, Alex Reynolds, and Evil Uno backstage. Silver complained about Adam Cole aligning with MJF instead of them. Reynolds said he helped train MJF to become a wrestler and he advised him he’d have to do whatever it takes to win. He said they need the ROH Tag Team Titles more than Cole & MJF to show people who think they don’t belong there that they’re wrong. He said they’ll beat them because they have to.
-Kelly said, “Ho ho ho!” in response to the promo. (Huh?) [c]
-Starks and Bill crossed paths with Schiavone. He asked for their reaction to the news of having to face Danielson tomorrow. Starks said every obstacle they throw his way he knocks out of the park. He said he’ll show exactly why he is whom he says he is, “which is being ‘Absolute’ Ricky Starks.”
(Keller’s Analysis: Could a typical AEW fan explain what “Absolute Ricky Starks” means? I think Starks should reestablish what he means so it doesn’t just became an empty go-to line.)
(2) THE AUSSIE OPEN (Kyle Fletcher & Mark Davis) vs. NICK WAYNE & KOMANDER (w/Alex Abrahantes)
The bell rang 37 minutes into the hour. A graphic advertised that Dennis Rodman was coming up later. Kelly called it a rout early as Fletcher and Davis dominated early including a near fall on Komander at 2:30. They cut to a partial split-screen break. [c/pss]
Wayne got the hot-tag after the break and he rallied with a flurry of high-energy offense against Fletcher and Davis. Kelly said there are a lot of similarities between Wayne and Will Ospreay. Wayne began to make a big production of setting up his next move. Nigel said he shouldn’t sit and think about it. Fletcher recovered and blocked Wayne’s move and then landed a half-and-half suplex sending Wayne onto his head. Komander superkicked Fletcher, but Davis caught him and landed a leaping piledriver.
Wayne fended off a double-team a minute later, but Fletcher and David finished him with their signature double-team move.
WINNERS: Aussie Open in 8:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: A lot of nice athleticism there. Having Wayne be another young wrestler like Dante Martin who shows flashes of brilliant but most often loses might not be the best course.)
-Schiavone interviewed Wayne afterward. Wayne said he’s frustrated that he lost, but he’s more frustrated that Darby Allin forgave A.R. Fox what he did to him. Darby walked out and said he’d explain. He said he has known Wayne since he was eight years old and they’ve been through so much. He said Wayne’s father trained him. He joked about being 120 pounds then and merely 125 pounds now. Darby said there was a stretch where he didn’t talk about his mother or father for three years, and before he could make things right, his dad died. He said he has to live with that every day. He said he wishes he could have made things right. He said Fox was one of his trainers too and he had to let the hate go. “That’s why I forgave him so fast,” he said. He told Wayne to find it in his heart to “let it go.” Darby pointed at the All Out graphic and he said it’d be an honor if he was in his corner at All Out.
Christian Cage’s music played and he walked out with Luchasaurus. Nigel said, “Here comes the father of the year.” Christian said it was rude of him last week to speak so much about his father when he forgot to ask what his mom’s name is. He said he couldn’t help noticing her at ringside last week “so it was a missed opportunity on my part so perhaps I should just slide into her DM’s and maybe change that.”
Christian asked Darby if he heard him right that he didn’t talk to Wayne’s parents for over two years. “So Nick Wayne is your personal pity project,” he said. “You’re using him to justify to yourself that you’re actually a decent human being.” He said he should take after him because “I don’t pretend to be something I’m not.” Kelly said he pretends to be a champion that he isn’t.
Christian said they’re in the home of the Blackhawks, so fans can smell a loser like Darby. He said he’s a loser at life. He told Wayne to bring a towel with him at ringside because he’ll need it to throw a towel into the ring. He said the match will be a one-sided bludgeoning at the hands of the most complete big man in the business today. He said he “I… we will be standing at the top of the mountain and still the face of TNT, now and forever.”
-Claudio Castagnoli and Wheeler Yuta spoke backstage. Claudio gave Yuta a series of uppercuts and told Kingston that they beat up Wheeler every day of the week. He said Wheeler always gets back up. He said he doesn’t stay down like Eddie does. He said he thought he’d come back from Japan a different person. He said he didn’t think he could lose any more respect for Kingston, but he couldn’t have been more wrong. He expressed disgust and walked away. Yuta collapsed. Fans laughed.
(Keller’s Analysis: I’m glad they followed up on Darby so willingly forgiving Fox by having Darby explain that his life experience leads to him letting grudges go. It makes sense for Fox to not be as willing to forgive and forget, but overall they’ve made a solid attempt to make this seem relatable. Outside of a pro wrestling context, obviously what Fox and Swerve did to Wayne was unforgivable and criminal, so it’s still tough to get past that because that angle was so hardcore.)
Kingston and Shibata retorted what Claudio said. Kingston said Claudio is a coward who won’t fight him again. Shibata held up his phone and it said in English, “You both suck.” Kingston laughed. [c]
-Kelly and Nigel narrated snippets of the women’s four-way match at All In with Saraya winning. Then a clip aired of Soho on Dynamite stealing Statlander’s TBS Title belt.
-Nair interviewed Saraya and Soho backstage. She asked about the dissension between the Outcasts. Saraya told Lexi she was being ugly. She said it was “mean girl” behavior. She gushed about winning in front of over 80,000 people and how disgusted she was to back in front of U.S. fans. Soho said Statlander has never defeated her in her entire time in AEW. She said they remain the most dominant faction in all of pro wrestling and they’ll prove it by winning the other women’s title. Lexi asked if they’re worried about how Toni Storm is behaving. Soho said Storm will be just fine, but she did see her in the parking lot, half-naked, throwing shoes at birds. She said she is going to walk out of Chicago as the TBS Champion.
[HOUR TWO]
-Schivone stood mid-ring and introduced Dennis Rodman. Kelly touted Rodman’s work ethic in his NBA career. They showed the Chicago Bulls banners hanging above them. Rodman entered the ring and stood with his back to the hard camera. Schiavone had to reposition him. He asked what he was doing in AEW. Out came Jeff Jarrett & Co. to Jarrett’s theme. Karen Jarrett led the group to the ring. Karen ordered Schiavone to get out of the ring. Jeff joined in telling Schiavone to get out.
Jarrett said its great for all the legends to be back in Chicago tonight. He said he and Dennis go way back. He said they all have something in common. He touted Singh and Lethal and Dutt. He said Dutt strives for World Peace wherever he goes, just like Rodman. He said Karen looks great in a dress, and so does Dennis. Jarrett said Dennis was an integral part of one the greatest factions of all time. He said it was “too sweet” and “for life.” He told Rodman to join his family.
Rodman took the mic and said, “Chicago! It’s a great day to be in Chicago.” He said it’s his first time there in 13 years. He said he loves that they are loving AEW. Jarrett told Rodman to not make him put Satnum on him and dunk on him like the Jazz did in 1998. “I want an answer and I want it now, “Jarrett said.” He said he whipped Shaq’s ass and Shaq was he size of Singh.
Dutt tried to place peacemaker and told Rodman his answer needs to be yes. He offered a handshake. Rodman threw Dutt to the mat. The Acclaimed them came out to their music. Anthony Bowens said he doesn’t know what their problem is with Rodman, but they can all face them right now. Billy Gunn said he’s not wrestling twice in one night, but tomorrow he’s open to a match. Kelly said “Wait, what?” He volunteered to defend the Trios Titles against them at All Out with Rodman in their corner.
(Keller’s Analysis: The crowd didn’t seem on TV to be all that into Rodman, including not much reaction for the announcement by Billy of the Trios Title with Rodman at ringside.)
-A video aired on Shane Taylor. Taylor said he’ll take back his ROH TV Title and get back to establishing his legacy.
-A promo aired with Joe backstage. He said the last week has been turbulent, and in times of turmoil, the jackals come out to feast. He said he wanted to be a reality check for Taylor. He contrasted what Taylor wants versus what is really going to happen. He said he will make it clear who the true king of television is. He said he’ll be the man who is standing over him at All Out.
(3) TONI STORM & SARAYA & RUBY SOHO vs. BRITT BAKER & KRIS STATLANDER & HIKARU SHIDA
The bell rang 12 minutes into the hour. Nigel said it was a huge distraction for Britt as a dentist being in a country with such bad tooth hygiene. He said it’d be like being a dietician in America. They cut to a split-screen break at 3:00. [c/ss]
Back from the break, Statalnder had Saraya covered after a powerslam. Storm tried to break it up, but Statlander moved and Storm landed on Saraya. Fans chanted, “You f—ed up!” Baker went to work on Soho next. Kelly touted this several times as Baker’s long-awaited Collision debut. Storm sprayed Baker in the face with green paint, leading to Soho landing her finisher for the win. Storm tried to explain herself to Saraya afterward.
WINNERS: Soho & Storm & Saraya in 8:00.
-A promo aired with Adam Cole who talked about defending the ROH Tag Team Titles with MJF against Dark Order at All Out. Cole said MJF sent him some messages to read. He said Reynolds did help train him “and it took me nine years to get rid of all your bad habits.” He also read MJF saying Silver is the size of a dollar store garden gnome. Cole wouldn’t read the final part of MJF’s message “because it’s disgusting.” [c]
-Nair interviewed Statlander about her match against Soho. Soho and Saraya interrupted early. Saraya told Statlander to shut up and called her a “stupid bitch!” Statlander yelled she’d see Soho tomorrow.
(Keller’s Analysis: The percentage of times women yelling at each other on pro wrestling shows leads to someone calling someone a bitch is way too high. It’s so lazy and has lost it’s punch because it’s just overdone. How about we take a year off from using that word and expand the vocabulary of insults?)
(4) POWERHOUSE HOBBS vs. GPA
Hobbs immediately crashed into GPA in the corner and then landed a spinebuster for the win.
WINNER: Hobbs in about ten seconds.
-Afterward Miro came out to his music and got into a fight mid-ring with Hobbs. Miro clotheslined Hobbs over the top rope. Hobbs grabbed Miro and yanked him to ringside and sent him hard into the ringside stairs. Miro backdropped Hobbs into the crowd. Kelly said they’d tear each other apart on PPV.
-Kelly and Nigel hyped the All Out PPV and also the Zero Hour free preview show.
-A video package aired hyping the Kenny Omega vs. Konosuke Takeshita match. [c]
-Orange Cassidy sat backstage and talked about defending his International Title against Moxley. “I don’t like this,” he said. “I don’t want to be talking about this right now.” He said hehad his first AEW singles match ever against Pac in that arena years ago and he proved he belonged in AEW. He said he then faced Will Ospreay and proved he could hang with the best wrestlers in the world. He said Moxley is next. He said he picked AEW up when it was down and put all of the weight on his shoulders. He said on Sunday, when he beats Moxley, he will take the weight off of his shoulders and put it on his.
(Keller’s Analysis: That was certainly a reference to C.M. Punk, but not a dig or insult or anything like that. Mox filled in on top when Punk went down with injury last summer and now he’s being asked to move into the main event slot at All Out the weekend Punk was fired.)
(5) DAX HARWOOD (w/Cash Wheeler) vs. “SWITCHBLADE” JAY WHITE (w/Colten Gunn, Austin Gunn, Juice Robinson)
A clip aired of the July 15 match between White & Juice and FTR. Nigel said it was a night he’ll remember forever. They also showed the Young Bucks snubbing FTR’s handshake offer at All In the previous Sunday. Jim Ross joined in on commentary for this match and said it was the prerogative of the Bucks. The bell rang 40 minutes into the hour.
White took an early break at ringside to regroup. Fans chanted “Ass boys!” White took Dax down with a side headlock. Dax escaped and took White down with some chops. They cut to a partial break at 2:00 with White recovering at ringside. [c/ss]
Dax landed a superplex at 9:00 for a two count. Jay avoided Dax’s top rope diving headbutt seconds later. White scored a two count as they cut to another split-screen break. [c/ss]
They fought at ringside where Dax chopped White. Back in the ring, Dax set up another top rope move, but White pulled himself to the ring apron. Dax chopped White over the top rope back into the ring.
Dax landed a leaping piledriver for a near fall at 17:00. White shifted his weight onto Dax on a top rope move and scored a two count. Dax landed a slingshot powerbomb for a near fall. Dax shifted into a sharpshooter, but White rolled to the bottom rope. Cash spit at White’s cohorts at ringside. White, meanwhile, landed a Blade Runner on Dax on the floor. Dax surprised White with a small package for a near fall. White then hit another Blade Runner in the ring for the win. They showed Cash reacting at ringside. The Gunns and Juice celebrated with Jay in the ring.
WINNER: White in 20:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: A good, hard-hitting match.)
OR CHECK THIS OUT AT PROWRESTLING.NET: AEW Collision results (9/2): Powell’s review of Tony Khan’s statement on firing CM Punk, Ricky Starks calling out Ricky Steamboat, Dennis Rodman’s appearance, Dax Harwood vs. Jay White
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