SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
The following report originally published 20 years ago this week here at PWTorch.com…
WWE RAW REPORT
NOVEMBER 22, 2004
LIVE FROM BUFFALO, N.Y.
-Trish Stratus came on to Shelton Benjamin backstage. She was still wearing her nose guard while brushing her hair. Shelton said he had a six-man tag match to tend to. Trish asked, “What about my needs?” Shelton said she’d find someone else because she “is the biggest slut in WWE.” Vince McMahon barged in and said it was scandalous and he could see the moral fabric of America disintegrating before his very eyes. Vince said he can see the racial overtones. Vince then said this is WWE, not the NFL, and damn sure not the NBA, because this type of sexual titillation could cause athletes to barge into the stands and attack the audience. “If that were to happen, it would be the downfall of civilization as we know it.”
Benjamin told Vince he needs to lighten up. He said he has a board of directors to answer to. When Shelton left, Trish dropped her towel. The Monday Night Football theme song played as Vince and Trish attempted to make out. Vince then turned to the camera and said, “Are you ready for some wrestling?” This was the spoof of the Monday Night Football controversy with Terrell Owens. It was a nice spoof on the fake outrage last week over the MFN incident, but he seemed to be putting the NBA fan-player brawl in the same category and thus downplaying it.
-Chris Benoit stepped out and announced he was G.M. this week. No surprise it’s him this week as they seem to marching through in reverse order of WWE’s internal unofficial depth chart, with Maven, then Benoit, then Chris Jericho, then Randy Orton. I kept waiting for someone to interrupt Benoit 10 seconds into his G.M. speech like they do with all of his promos since they don’t trust him to hold the attention of viewers with the cadence of his talking. Benoit announced the matches, as we reported exclusively earlier in the “WWE News” section. Maven vs. Gene Snitsky, Batista vs. Chris Jericho, and Lita vs. Molly vs. Trish. He announced Coach vs. J.R. in “a real match” (which will apparently be switched to Coach vs. Rhino later). Benoit then pointed to a cage hanging above the ring and said he’d be facing Hunter in the main event.
1 — GENE SNITSKY vs. MAVEN
They showed a close-up of Snitsky’s injured left eye. It was pretty graphic. The injury was suffered at Survivor Series. They also showed a clip of Snitsky giving Maven a big boot last week on Raw after teasing he might kick Hunter instead. Snitsky kicked Maven twice off the ring apron as he tried to enter the ring. Maven made it into the ring, dropkicked Snitsky, and clotheslined him over the top rope to the floor. They kept showing close-ups of the blood-shot and swollen left eye of Snitsky. Snitsky soon regained control, screaming as he jammed Maven’s head against the ringpost with his knee. Maven came back at 2:45 and took Snitsky down with a Russian leg sweep. He followed up by hitting a top rope crossbody block and a second rope bulldog for a near fall. Snitsky then took Maven down with a big boot out of nowhere, he pounded his chest and yelled, and then he gave Maven his pump-handle powerslam for the clean win.
WINNER: Snitsky at 4:11.
STAR RATING: * — Basic match designed to give Snitsky a clean win but give Maven just enough offense to not be totally buried in the process. Still, for someone who was hinted at being added to Evolution, WWE Creative doesn’t seem especially concerned with “protecting” Maven at this point or giving any signs that they plan to move him up the card anytime soon (unless they’re doing a losing stream gimmick that leads to him snapping and joining the dark side).
[Commercial Break]
-Hunter got in Batista’s face backstage, showing skepticism about Batista’s claim that he would have his back during the World Title match. Hunter said he doesn’t want to jump through hoops every week. Ric Flair tried to mediate the argument. Batista told Hunter forcefully: “You need to calm down.” Hunter said, “A hundred bucks says you lose that.” Hunter turned his back. Flair tried to calm Batista down.
-Stacy stood in center-ring with a t-shirt airgun, firing them into the crowd. I’m surprising the gun’s backfire didn’t fling her backward into the corner turnbuckle. She pulled out an ECW DVD from her pants and asked who would like the copy. Let me guess. That case never gets washed. Simon Dean (a/k/a Nova from the BWO in ECW) interrupted. He said he didn’t buy time on the show this week, but he had to come out anyway.
He said when he heard her say ECW, he had to bring them a DVD they could actually use. He said to him ECW stands for “Eating Causes Weight Gain.” He said with Thanksgiving coming up, the day of overeating, he recommended everyone buy his Simon System DVD. He told the fans that women like Stacy aren’t interested in fat slobs, but instead are interested in people like him. Stacy said she usually doesn’t date people who look in the mirror more than she does. Simon aggressively asked Stacy if she was kidding.
Hurricane ran to the rescue, giving Stacy a chance to bail out of the ring. He asked Simon, “What’s up wit dat?” Simon gave Hurricane a cheapshot kick to the gut after claiming he had an amateur wrestling background. Hurricane fought back quickly, pounding away at Dean’s head. Dean used a low-blow to regain control. “Is that part of the Simon System?” asked Ross. Sean then whipped Hurricane with a belt. Rosey made the save. He actually left the locker room at the same time as Hurricane, but it took him that much longer to get to the ring. Lawler suggested to Ross that maybe he needs to be on the Simon System. “Just shut up,” Ross shot back.
-Two of the latest WWE Divas gossiped backstage about the Batista-Hunter argument. Someone is trying really hard to find reasons for scantily clad hot women to be get screen time on Raw. That was a clever excuse, but still stretching it. Flair and Batista walked into the hallway. Flair said Hunter is just tense due to the four weeks of being at the mercy of guest G.M.s. An overheated Batista said he wouldn’t allow Hunter to talk to him that way.
[Commercial Break]
2 — BATISTA vs. CHRIS JERICHO
It was back and forth early on, but Batista eventually overpowered Jericho. Ross said Jericho would be the victim of Batista’s rage at Hunter. Batista got Jericho upside down in the corner of the ring and choked him from ringside. The ref called for the bell and DQ’d Batista. Ross and Lawler agreed that Jericho’s neck at risk of being broken. Batista clotheslined Jericho from behind afterward. Ross said Batista was a powerkeg and asked if he’d explode tonight. Most regular Raw viewers have to be suspecting that Batista and Hunter are putting on a show for some reason, teasing dissension so Batista can gain Benoit’s trust somewhat during the main event cage match, only to turn on him. But I’m leaning toward Batista turning and breaking away from Evolution. In a Torch Instant Poll last week, a series of potential changes were offered for Evolution and the no. 1 choice among respondents was Batista breaking away from Evolution.
WINNER: Jericho at 3:50 via DQ.
STAR RATING: *
[Commercial Break]
-Hunter gave Batista a hard time for losing the match, asking when he was going to pay the $100 because he technically lost. Batista said he walked out of the ring, whereas Jericho was being helped out of the ring. Hunter told Batista he has a million dollar body and a ten cent brain. He said he brought him into Evolution because he needed someone he could count on. He said if he couldn’t count on him, he’d have to find someone else. Batista stormed off. Hunter told Flair to talk to Batista. Flair told Hunter, “With all due respect to you, you better back off Batista.”
-Todd Grisham interviewed Edge. He again talked about how much he deserves a World Title match. Edge said he saw doubt in Grisham’s eyes, so he took the mic and asked Maria and Christy. Christy, when asked, said she didn’t think Edge deserved the title match. She apologized, but Edge told her to keep apologizing to her mirror and walked off. Edge asked a backstage worker, who said, “No.” He said he voted for Shawn Michaels at Taboo Tuesday. When Edge grabbed him, Benoit stepped in and told him to do something about it if he had a problem with how he was running the show.
[Commercial Break]
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3 — COACH vs. RHYNO
Coach cut a promo on Jim Ross, whom he thought he was facing, saying he expected Ross to have a heart attack some day, but in the mean time, he was going to take him to the wood shed. Benoit showed up on the big screen and said he was confused. He thought by J.R., he was supposed to book Coach against “Just Rhyno.” Rhyno ran to the ring. Coach stomped away at him in the corner for a few seconds, but Rhyno shot back with a decisive Gore for the win.
WINNER: Rhyno at 0:25.
STAR RATING: n/a
[Commercial Break]
-They recapped Benoit’s show-opening G.M. announcements, mainly giving himself a title shot against Hunter in a cage.
4 — TRISH STRATUS vs. LITA vs. MOLLY HOLLY
Ross said, “Beauty is only skin deep.” Lawler said, “Skin deep is deep enough for me.” Molly and Trish worked together. A fan held up a sign that read: “PWTorch.com – Keller – God.” About a minute later, a man in a headset was walking around the area. Trish and Molly worked together early on, but eventually turned against each other. Lita rammed Trish’s face into the mat, then Molly shoved Lita to ringside. Molly then hit the Molly-Go-Round. Lita broke up the count, and gave Molly the Twist of Fate, but Trish yanked Lita out of the ring and scored the pin. Afterward, Lita applied a facelock on Trish’s sore nose, causing Trish to tapout and squeal.
WINNER: Trish at 4:00.
STAR RATING: *
-Flair told Batista backstage to back off and not make the same mistake Randy Orton made. He said that Hunter made him something special. Flair told Batista when Hunter is ready to step down, it will be his time to be World Champion. Batista said, “Yeah, but at what price.” He said he was tired of being treated like a muscleheaded idiot. “We owe him,” said Flair. Flair told him not to do something he’d regret and instead apologize. Batista said he must be kidding. He said if he does something, he’s certain of one thing – he won’t regret it.
[Commercial Break]
5 — EUGENE & WILLIAM REGAL & SHELTON BENJAMIN vs. LA RESISTANCE & CHRISTIAN
The faces got in early offense, then the heels took control. Christian went into a side headlock, which Eugene fought out of immediately. Benjamin hot-tagged in and hit a Stringer splash (had Sting ever wrestled for WWE, that move would probably be called that, too). La Resistance took over with a Hart Attack clothesline on Benjamin. Regal made the save. Eugene hit Grenier with a Stunner, then Benjamin hit the T-Bone Suplex for the win. Eugene celebrated with kids in the ring afterward. Ross said it reminded him again of JYD.
WINNERS: Eugene & Regal & Benjamin at 4:10.
STAR RATING: * — Lots of one star matches tonight. Nothing bad enough or lackluster enough to rate lower, but nothing long enough or epic enough to deserve anything higher.
-Another Hassan/Daivari vignette aired. They showed airport footage. Hassan said what isn’t justifiable is the outright prejudice they have to endure. “Because we’re of their dissent, we are singled out and humiliated and often strip searched. We are Arab-Americans and we demand the same rights that any American has. If you don’t give us the respect that we demand, then I will beat it out of anyone who gets in my way.” Daivari then talked. Can anyone translate for us? If so, drop me an email. They softened the language again from Hassan, with him switching from “revolting” to beating people up. That’s good. No more praising Allah, either. But everything they said makes them babyfaces, not heels, other than wanting to beat up anyone who doesn’t pay them respect.
-Another ECW DVD commercial aired.
[Commercial Break]
-Ross and Lawler showed the top ten point scorers in the Fantasy G.M. game. I wonder if someone named “PWTorchcom” was in the top ten, if they’d show it?
-Benoit walked into the cage for his match. When it was time for Hunter to come out, they went backstage where Batista stormed out of a locker room with his bags in hand. Flair then rushed out of the room calling for help. The camera went into the locker room where Hunter was face down on the floor. Flair was shouting about Batista snapping, even sneaking in a “Jesus Christ” that didn’t get edited. Val Venis, with a shaved head, was first on the scene. Benoit and Edge eventually stepped into the room as WWE officials checked on Hunter, who wasn’t moving. Edge told Benoit that now they share in common having a title match yanked out from underneath them. Edge said unlike Benoit, he would have won if given the opportunity. Benoit shoved Edge down and booked Edge as the replacement to Hunter. The question now is whether Batista really attacked Hunter or whether they faked the attack and all of the arguing just so Hunter could avoid facing Benoit in the cage. The announcers should be put in a position to ask out loud that somewhat obvious question, but WWE hopes viewers hadn’t thought of that.
[Commercial Break]
6 — CHRIS BENOIT vs. EDGE
They showed Batista in the back watching on a monitor. Ross wondered what he was doing there since he thought he had left the arena. That was the hook before the first break.
[Commercial Break]
Benoit was down after the break, bleeding from the forehead. Ross said things got physical during the break. Benoit made the comeback at 11:00 and hit five German suplexes on Edge. Benoit climbed to the top of the cage and almost was over the top when Edge got up and pounded away at Benoit. Benoit knocked Edge to the mat with headbutts. Taking a bump off the top rope in any format should be a bigger deal, but now it’s treated as “just another bump.” Benoit hit a top rope headbutt, which Ross attributed to Dynamite Kid. Benoit scored a two count, then applied the Crippler Crossface. Ross said, “Edge is going to tap.” We knew that meant he wouldn’t. And he didn’t. Edge speared Benoit into the door and knocked Benoit to the floor. Benoit was declared the winner. Edge was dismayed with the turn of events.
WINNER: Benoit at 15:36.
STAR RATING: ***1/4 — Not four stars, but a good TV match.
-They cut backstage to Batista watching the match on the monitor. Flair asked Batista what was going through his mind. Batista told Flair to tell Triple H to get his ass to the ring so he could finish what he started. “And you had better decide whose side you’re on,” said Batista. Ross said, “This is going to be good. This is going to be an explosion.” It’s a good thing Batista issued that challenge, because otherwise (a) Hunter wouldn’t have been in the overrun segment, and we can’t have that; and (b) they would have had ten minutes of TV to fill since the main event ended a few minutes before the top of the hour.
[Commercial Break]
-Batista stood center-ring. He said he wasn’t after Hunter’s title, he was after him personally. Of course, Hunter was “too much of a man” not to accept Batista’s challenge. Flair tried to hold him back, but the battered and beaten Hunter limped his way to the ring in a torn t-shirt. They went nose-to-nose. Ross and Lawler said the end of Evolution was at hand. The crowd chanted “Ba-ti-sta.” Hunter said, “I only have one thing to say to you! Well done.” Hunter laughed. Flair broke into laughter. Batista smiled. They all gloated about fooling everyone. “I love when a plan comes to fruition,” said Hunter.
Hunter paid off the fake doctor. Hunter said he wasn’t going to let Benoit get a title shot against him just because he was in control one week. Hunter explained his plan and gloated that the fans bought it “hook, line, and sinker.” Hunter told the fans not to feel bad because their acting was unbelievable. The fans who chanted “Ba-ti-sta” were feeling pretty footlish at this point. He said the big star, the MVP, was Batista. Hunter said, “That was a performance worthy of an Academy Award, or at least a Slammy.” He said, “In all seriousness, you still should have beat Jericho.” Batista didn’t look pleased.
Hunter said the night is young and he is still the World Hvt. Champion. “I’m not one to rub it into your faces, but ladies come on out and bring the champaign.” Instead, Randy Orton stepped out with a mic in hand. “Where are the hot girls,” asked Lawler. Orton said, “Let me guess. Not quite what you were expecting.” He gave them credit for “pulling a good swerve.” He said next week he’s the General Manager of Raw. So Jericho gets the last slot as guest G.M. Hunter mockingly said, “I’m so scared.” He reminded Hunter that he doeesn’t get a shot at the World Hvt. Championship.
Orton said, “Trust me, I remember that stipulation.” Orton said he was giving Hunter some options. He said he can face him one-on-one and if he wins, that stip is lifted. Hunter said nobody would be interested in seeing that match. He asked the crowd if they wanted to see him face Orton. The crowd, of course, cheered. Although not as loudly as they probably hoped (at least how it came across on TV, which isn’t all that reliable). Orton said therefore it would be Hunter facing everybody who is behind door no. 2. Out walked Maven, Jericho, Benjamin, followed by the rest of the entire locker room. Orton called it a “company-wide, over-the-top-rope battle royal.” He said Flair and Batista would be in, too. Flair was upset, although he should have been pleased that he could be in there to help Hunter. Orton announced the battle royal would be for the World Hvt. Title.
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