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SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
Housekeeping
• Stephanie Vaquer signed with WWE. AEW did make her offer but she opted to go elsewhere. It would seem that she laundered herself to WWE through AEW but you have to respect the game.
• Willow Nightingale won the CMLL Title vacated in the wake of Vaquer’s departure, defeating Lluvia and Viva Van in a triple threat match.
• There will be no more signage for Ric Flair’s mail order energy drink as the Nature Boy’s time and Wooo! Energy’s deal with AEW are officially over.
Intro
It’s Dynamite 250! To celebrate the occasion, we’ve got two PPV-caliber matches and a must see promo on the docket. The last two weeks of Dynamite have each featured a major heel turn. I don’t expect that tonight, but I do expect major developments in the build to All In as well as next week’s Blood & Guts. So settle in and get comfortable and get ready to enjoy some high quality graps.
Elite Hostile Takeover
Latest Developments
Swerve Strickland officially joined Team AEW which prompted Hangman to join The Elite. Swerve also challenged Kazuchika Okada to a match tonight. Elsewhere, Darby Allin returned by Brandon Cutler and set his sights on Jack Perry.
Analysis
In the same promo where he spoke about Danielson, Swerve declared himself captain of Team AEW and challenged the Rainmaker to a match. After his loss earlier in the night, Hangman agreed to be the fifth man for the Elite so that he could get his hands on Swerve. There was noticeable tension between him and Okada. Darby Allin made a surprise return beating up Brandon Cutler, who seems to exist simply to get his ass kicked. I fully expect Darby to join Team AEW this week. Not that I want them to, but it seems like The Acclaimed are likely to be the final two members given they still received their tag title match yet.
This Blood & Guts match is feeling very reminiscent of the 1993 WarGames which was not great. It was Sting, Davey Boy Smith, and The Nasty Boys against Vader, Sid, and Harlem Heat. It was a very random assortment of talent. The talent involved may not feel as random, but the match already feels just as unmemorable.
The biggest problem is that the story was the biggest story in the company at one point, but now it’s shrunk to just another story. The Elite have not been throwing their weight around as much as they should have. Most importantly, while WarGames matches didn’t historically have stakes attached to them, this story feels like stakes are necessary to resolve the conflict at the heart of it – which is who is running AEW. I hope that gets added this week or else this becomes a Blood & Guts match just to be a Blood & Guts match.
Quickly on the Swerve vs Okada match, it’s crazy that it’s happening on free TV. That aside, Swerve should go over clean. He’s the world champion. Okada’s basically a living legend. It doesn’t hurt him to lose to the champ and it continues to put Swerve over strong.
Grade: B-
Swerve Strickland vs. Bryan Danielson
Latest Developments
Bryan Danielson defeated Hangman Adam Page in an excellent final to the men’s Owen Hart tournament.
Analysis
Boy was I wrong. I felt certain that Hangman was going to win this tournament. In fact, I was actually upset that Danielson won which was a strange feeling for me given that I love Bryan Danielson. I felt and still feel that there was more meat on the bone of Hangman-Swerve blowoff, but here we are.
In a promo after the match, Swerve told Danielson it was going to be an honor to fight him at Wembley, that he intends to get his win back over Danielson, and that All In will be Bryan’s “final countdown.” They have six weeks to give people the feeling that there’s even a small chance that Bryan might actually win the match. There’s no question the GOAT will do GOAT things in the main event of the biggest show of the year and put on a phenomenal match, but will the story be there?
Grade: A-
MJF vs. Will Ospreay
Latest Developments
In a surprising twist, Ospreay and MJF agreed to International Title fight on tonight’s Dynamite. Elsewhere, Pac became the next challenger for that title by winning a “Global Glory” four-way match.
Analysis
The opening segment of last week’s show provided quite the left turn in this feud. Ospreay cut a pretty good promo in which he inspired the crowd to chant “left nut.” MJF appeared on the big screen sitting in a fancy chair and sipping from a glass of wine. While the setting was great, the actual content was boilerplate MJF material. The key part of the promo was him challenging Ospreay to a match for tonight which shocked me. Ospreay accepted and the match is on.
AEW does not false advertise or do non-finishes which is good for credibility. That means Ospreay is likely to win clean or we’re headed for a time-limit draw which is AEW’s booking escape hatch. Draws are a clever way to get around giving a clear winner in a big match without making the fans feel cheated. There have been a couple of draws already this year so Tony needs to be careful not to overuse it.
As far as what this means for All In, I see both of these men on separate trajectories. Pac won the “Global Glory” four-way match over Claudio Castagnoli, Tomohiro Ishii, and Kyle Fletcher to earn a future shot at the International Title and then cut a promo about not missing out on Wembley this year. It would certainly appear that it’s going to be Essex vs Newcastle-Upon-Tyne in a Battle of Britain at All In, for Ospreay’s Title. Meanwhile, Danny Garcia once again figured prominently into the opening promo. It’s entirely possible Garcia makes a surprise return and sets up a match against MJF at All In after all. If nothing else this feud keeping me guessing.
Grade: B+
Toni Storm vs. Mariah May
Latest Developments
Mariah May defeated Willow Nightingale to win the women’s Owen Hart Tournament and then turned on Toni Storm in emphatic and memorable fashion.
Analysis
Mariah and Willow had a really good match in the main event of Dynamite. A particular highlight was Mariah avoiding a pounce by slowing up just slightly, lowering her head, and driving into Willow with a vicious headbutt. Kris Statlander and Stokely Hathaway did interfere in the match, but their interference did not lead directly to the finish. Instead, Mariah hit her “It’s Gonna Be May” knee strike for a two count. Mariah rolled Willow up with the same pinning combination she used to beat Saraya and Shida, but again only got two.
At this point, I started to get a little nervous especially after what happened in the men’s final. In the end, Mariah reversed a Death Valley Driver into a victory roll (a little homage to the finish of Bret vs. Owen at WrestleMania X) for the win. That’s when the real fun began. Toni Storm, who had been at ringside watching nervously, jumped into the ring to celebrate with her protégé. They literally skipped up the ramp to where the trophy and prize belt were. Mariah grabbed the belt and then blasted Toni in the face with it. She whipped Toni with the belt and then turned her ire to Luther who ate some belt shots of his own before being knocked off the stage through two tables.
Turning her attention back to a now bloody and distraught Storm, she continued to brutalize her mentor. She grabbed Toni’s high heeled shoe and, with blood pouring down Toni’s face, proceeded to beat her repeatedly in the head with it while Toni wailed in despair. Not all the shots connected, but the one’s that connected, CONNECTED. Mariah dug the heel into the cut on Toni’s forehead and then rubbed her face against Toni’s thus smearing some of the blood on herself.
The show went off the air with Mariah, Toni’s blood on her face, standing over Toni who was covered in blood and looked like a damn murder victim. It was one hell of a visual. It was also quite poetic that after a year of warning everyone to “watch for the shoe,” it was Toni who should’ve been watching for the shoe all along.
This was perfect. Eight months of storytelling built on the subtle evolution of the interpersonal relationship between these women built to this moment. They set out to put a modern spin, via a 60-year-old movie, on a wrestling story that dates back to Larry Zbyszko and Bruno Sammartino and knocked it out of the park. This has been a near flawless adaptation of “All About Eve.” Mariah showed up as a superfan, worked her way to understudy, and now betrayed her mentor. Now the ball is in Mariah’s court.
Tonight on Dynamite, she’s going to deliver the most important promo of her career. In the movie, Eve doesn’t explain her nefarious plan herself. It’s revealed through dialogue of a supporting character. Mariah does not have that luxury. She’s got to hold court in the ring and explain herself. I believe she’s going to kill it. Toni Storm went into this black and white la la land just about a year ago. This feels like a full circle opportunity.
This attack should gradually pull her back to reality because she needs to be deadly serious from here to Wembley. This is the best women’s story in wrestling and among the best stories period. Credit to Tony for letting Mariah not just turn heel but do so in the most unambiguous way possible even though the eventual showdown will be in Mariah’s hometown. Now it’s just a matter of keeping it piping hot over the next six weeks on the way to Wembley.
Grade: A+ (I would give it a higher grade if I could)
Mercedes Moné vs. Dr. Britt Baker, DMD
Latest Developments
Mercedes held a championship toast before being interrupted by and running away from Dr. Britt Baker.
Analysis
Mercedes came down to the ring, put herself over as usual and then told Britt that they weren’t going to have a match at All In, but if they did, what she did to her would be worse than a stroke. Mercedes poured herself a drink and that’s when Britt made her appearance. As she hit the ring, Mercedes bailed through the crowd.
After the confrontation, Mercedes tweeted that she was running an open challenge for this week for anybody other than Britt. On Collision, Nyla Rose won a squash match before announcing that she would be answering Mercedes’s challenge.
This was simple but effective. Mercedes is the perfect arrogant heel ducking her competition. I appreciate that Nyla got the win before she answered the challenge. It made seem more legit. It also gave Nyla, who’s one of the funniest people in AEW, some mic time. My favorite line was when she said “I’ve never driven a Mercedes but on Wednesday I’m damn sure gonna wreck one.”
The match should good and Mercedes gets to play the underdog which means she’ll be even more arrogant after she beats Nyla. Don’t be surprised if Kamille debuts soon as Mercedes heavy to keep Britt away as Mercedes continues to try and avoid the match with her.
Grade: A
Kris Statlander vs. Willow Nightingale
Latest Developments
Statlander and Stokely got involved in Willow’s match against Mariah May. Despite losing the Owen Hart Tournament final, Willow went and won the vacant CMLL Women’s Title while Stat vowed to keep coming after her.
Analysis
The Willow-Mariah match has already been discussed but shout out to Willow for her Nation of Domination-era Owen Hart cosplay. On Collision Stokely and Statlander explained their actions. Statlander said that it would never be over between them. While that was airing, Willow was in San Jose winning the aforementioned triple threat for the CMLL Women’s World Title. I fully expect the next encounter between Willow and Statlander to be for that championship.
Grade: B+
Thunder Rosa vs. Deonna Purrazzo
Latest Developments
Suddenly this feud is back on and there’s a lumberjack match scheduled for Collision.
Analysis
I certainly thought this feud was over after Deonna won the no DQ match several weeks back. After the Deonna lost to Shida in the Owen Tournament and attacked her, Rosa came to Shida’s aid and reignited the rivalry. My issue here is with the lumberjack match stipulation.
Historically, lumberjack matches are not only not blowoffs, they’re normally unserious affairs that are designed to devolve into chaos between the heel and face sides of the ring. I hope that doesn’t happen in this match. It’s taking place omn the first episode of Collision’s residency in Arlington which leads me to believe Rosa is finally going to get her win over Deonna.
Grade: B+
Chris Jericho vs. Hook
Latest Developments
Chris Jericho took out Samoa Joe during their Stampede Street Fight.
Analysis
The Stampede Street Fight was exactly what I predicted. Chris Jericho wrestle-synced his way through the match, walking and brawling with Samoa Joe out of the ring, through the crowd, and into the backstage area where things got painfully contrived.
First, Big Bill, conspicuous by his absence from Jericho’s side early in the match, just happened to be hiding in a room behind where Samoa Joe just happened to put Jericho in the Coquina Clutch. He bashed Joe with a chair and the fight moved to an area where a forklift complete with wooden pallet just happened to be set up. There’s no reason a forklift should have been where it was other than pure contrivance. Somehow things got worse from there.
Joe was chokeslammed onto the pallet and then driven by Jericho through the fakest wall I have ever seen. There was an episode of The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour where Lucy accidentally punched her away through the paper walls of her Japanese hotel room into the adjoining room which was occupied by ’40s and ’50s movie star Bob Cummings (playing himself). That gag was cleverer than this drivel which served as a write-off for Joe so he could reprise his role as Sweettooth in the second season of “Twisted Metal.”
The only redeeming part of this was Jericho doing the wave that’s part of his shtick, but doing it with a maniacal gleam in his eyes. Adjusting this “Learning Tree” trash to where he’s aware that it’s bad advice, but there’s a serious dark side underneath the façade will at least make it more bearable.
Grade: C+
Orange Cassidy vs. Trent Baretta
Latest Developments
After Trent attacked him again and cost him and Kyle O’Reilly a tag match on Collision, Orange Cassidy snapped and struck him in the back of the head with a monkey wrench.
Analysis
Orange Cassidy and Kyle O’Reilly were fighting the Undisputed Kingdom when Trent struck, pulling OC out of the ring and leaving KOR to fend for himself. The UK hit a spiked piledriver on KOR for the win.
After getting in a few shots on OC, Trent turned his attention to KOR. That’s when OC crawled back into the ring with a monkey wrench in hand and walloped Trent. This moment of rage from the normally laconic wrestler served as a write off for Trent who’s been battling an undisclosed injury since May. As a result, this feud is officially shelved.
Grade: Incomplete
Bang Bang Gang vs The Patriarchy vs. House of Black
Latest Developments
The Bang Bang Gang were stripped of the Trios Titles after Jay White went down with an injury. A future between them and the Patriarchy was set up to determine new trios champs.
Analysis
The Bang Bang Gang announced that Jay White was injured so Juice Robinson would be taking his place as a Trios Champion. Christopher Daniels came out and put the kibosh on that, informing the Bang Bang Gang that they could not Freebird the titles and stripping of the belts as a result.
Christian led the Patriarchy out to the stage and demanded to be anointed but CD wasn’t going for that either and set up a match between the two teams at a date not yet announced to determine new champions.
Meanwhile, the House of Black made it clear that they are coming after Christian this week. Given that I have not seen any valid report on a Jay White injury, I tend to think this injury is to get the titles off the Bang Bang Gang without them actually losing and then the HOB can make it a three-way match, take the fall and continue feuding with The Patriarchy. That’s fine by me.
Grade: B+
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