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It’s timeth for the smacketh down to be layeth. That’s right, the show where decisions are etched in stone, never to be undone at a press conference. Right? RIGHT?! Let’s dive into the most OVERRATED and UNDER-APPRECIATED moments from Friday Night Smackdown.
OVERRATED – ACKNOWLEDGE THE CCO
Does Paul “Triple H” Levesque really need an entrance? What other Chief Creative Officer gets an entrance? Also, if we’re going to do the whole entrance thing, can we at least go back to the water bottle schtick? On second thought, maybe spitting on the front row isn’t Covid-friendly. Maybe that’s what started… never mind. Let’s not go there. Bow down to the king!
UNDER-APPRECIATED – SUITS
For the last few years, I’ve found it so odd seeing Paul “Triple H” Levesque in suits. He just looked so out of his element. Shout out to Paul’s tailor, because the man is finally rocking suits that he looks at home in. It suits you, Trips!
OVERRATED – CHIEF CREATIVE METAPHORS
Delivering metaphors that are grounded in reality is an art form. Paul “Triple H” Levesque did not do that by saying “The road to WrestleMania is on fire”. Asphalt isn’t easily flammable, Paul. It needs to be heated to over 450 degrees to catch fire, and even then, it’s iffy at best. Cody is red hot, but he’s not setting any highways ablaze.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – ROCKY SUCKS
There’s nothing more beautiful than when the entire WWE universe is unified in their love or hate for a talent. What a powerful “Rocky sucks” chant. You’d think Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson ruined a beloved DC franchise or something. Love him or hate him, it’s always nice to see teamwork. Good job, audience…right here… in Charlotte, North Carolina! Thumbs up.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – CATCHPHRASES WITH A TWIST
While it was a bit on the nose at times, I enjoyed Paul “Triple H” Levesque’s twisting of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s catchphrases. What I don’t enjoy is typing out formal names with monikers in the middle. Can we please just pick one name and live with it? Does every Superman need a Clark Kent?
OVERRATED – BIG EGO VERSUS BIGGER EGO
I think we’re headed for a Paul “Triple H” Levesque versus Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson match at Wrestle “PLE” Mania. That’s a lot to put on a graphic. Let’s all keep the graphic designers at WWE in our thoughts this April. I really hope we’re not headed to this match. They should use Rock to boost a younger talent on the rise. We’ve seen this dance before, and I for one, am not interested in a No Ring For Old Men throw down…unless it’s Ric Flair, Shawn Michaels, Sting, Edge, or…okay fine. Let’s just get this over with.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – BIANCA “BICEPS” BELAIR
Bianca BeLair’s strength is insane. She’s so disarmingly charismatic and fun, that every time she whips out her finisher, it’s jarringly impressive. I will never get used to seeing her feats of strength.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – BAILEY’S HUG-WORTHY LOOK
Bailey’s hair gives me Rufio (from Hook) vibes. Looky looky she’s got Hooky. I’m here for it. Honorable mention to the vocal support from the crowd. Again, I love teamwork.
OVERRATED – NOSY DAKOTA KAI
There are so many nose rings between Bailey and Dakota Kai. If Damage Control really wants to get the upper hand, all they need is the giant magnet from Breaking Bad.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – THE AUSTRALIAN R
Dakota Kai pronouncing “no” as “nor”. I will always love that. Nor one can deny that Australian charm.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – BAILEY GOES FULL VOORHEES
Bailey flipping the microphone upside down and preparing to use it as a weapon was a fresh, albeit disturbing, breath of fresh air. No one does that! It’s all about the little things and I for one am glad Bailey had a brief moment of homicidal intention. That made the moment feel real.
OVERRATED – NO HUGS GIVEN
A classic “hug it out chant” that went ignored by Bailey and Dakota Kai. Few things in life are certain, but you definitely don’t talk about Fight Club, taxes must always be paid, and when the crowd calls from some love, give it to them!
UNDER-APPRECIATED – DADDY-LONG-LEGS
Randy Orton with Kayla Braxton. My God, the height difference is jarring here. This looks like a Daddy (see what I did there?) daughter dance.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – BUTCH LEAGUE
I don’t know why they got rid of Butch and went back to Pete Dunne, but I love this. He looks like he just had his batteries charged. He’s got a newfound pep in his step that goes nicely with a fur vest. Something about having Pete Dunne go by his original name makes me feel like I’m watching one of my favorite ‘90s movies, and discovering it still holds up. Goonies for life Pete, Goonies for LIFE.
OVERRATED – POSERS
Pete Dunne’s chin fist pose. Am I the only one that wants to know why he does this? Did he have a lot of root canals he’s still mad about? Does he hate his jawline? Is he doing a bored model pose? The world may never know.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – GOURMET SCRAPS
Wade Barrett saying “They’ve been making gourmet meals out of scraps for years.” Genius line. Golf clap for you, Wade “Stu” Barrett.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – REF’S TOUGH HAND
The ref’s hand during the D.I.Y versus Pete Dunne and Tyler Bate match. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a ref be forced to count to two so many times in one match. His hand has to be hurting.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – TOMMASO CIAMPA’S KNEE OF FURY
Tommaso Ciampa’s running knee. Holy knee strikes, Batman! That looked brutal. How did Pete even fling his body sideways from that position? No need to pat yourself on the back for that one Ciampa, we’ll all do it for you. Side note, I’m tempted to put the Wilhelm scream under that clip. YouTube it if that doesn’t land for you. You won’t regret it.
OVERRATED – D.I.Y. KEEP DOING THAT?
Can we ditch the gimmick of D.I.Y. patting themselves on the back? I think it waters down their toughness and undercuts impressive moves. Stop trying to make Fetch work, guys. Also, apparently we wear yellow on Fridays.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – I SAW THE SIGN
The “Wrestling is grrreat” sign. I wholeheartedly agree, and also I want some Frosted Flakes now.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – WHAT THE FLIP?
Tommaso Ciampa and Johnny Gargano’s flip and kick double-team move. What the Street Fighter was that?? I haven’t loved something that confuses me so much since True Detective season 1.
OVERRATED – THE MYSTERY OF THE MISSING PANTS
Tyler Bate’s trunks. I’m sorry, but I keep thinking he lost his pants, and oddly I feel like R-Truth stole them.
OVERRATED – LOOK WHAT I CAN DO
Tyler Bate’s weird dive into the ropes trick. I’m sorry but it doesn’t look like it buys you any momentum or power. It just makes me think of the old Stuart sketch on Mad TV where he goes “Look what I can do” and then does something ridiculous because he can. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – WHAT THE SELL?
Every single man in this D.I.Y. vs. Pete Dunne & Tyler Bate match is selling like his life depends on it. It’s like watching crash test dummies collide with rag dolls, in the world of John Wick. These guys are selling like it’s Black Friday, all the best moves are on sale, and I’m buying it all.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – KEVIN OWNS HIS JOKE
Kevin Owens explaining his joke to Bryon Saxton, saying “It’s his Dad”. I love it when stretching out a joke makes it even funnier. It’s very Jim from the office. I guess that makes Dom and Nick Mysterio both lucha libre versions of Dwight Schrute. Now I have a mental image of Dom jumping around a ring screaming “Parkour!” How did we get here? It’s kind of like the road to WrestleMania – nonsensical, random, but a helluva lot of fun.
OVERRATED – I MUSTACHE YOU ABOUT THIS
Byron Saxton’s mustache. Is he auditioning to play a renaissance swordsman? What’s going on here?
UNDER-APPRECIATED – THE WRONG NICK
R-Truth going for the swerve with mentioning “Nick”, only to fool Kevin Owens into thinking he means Nick of Dom and Nick Mysterio, then hilariously correcting him by making perfect sense saying, “Nick Aldis”. That was a great bait-and-switch. If R-Truth starts confusing who is who, it could be as funny as little Jimmy was. Whatever happened to Jimmy? Maybe he grew up, trained to be a wrestler and joined the bloodline, while his brother went on to main event status. Poor Jimmy. It’s probably a similar dynamic between Dom and Nick Mysterio.
OVERRATED – ONE MATCH TO GO
Saying “Good news, we have one match to go}. I’m sorry but the phrasing of that was weird. It sounded like a mother telling her child he has to wait a few more minutes, like we’re waiting for it to be over. I hate this “One match to go” format beat. It just sounds like they’re saying “I promise we’re almost done, so get excited because it’s almost over!” Why not just say “It’s time for the Main Event” or something with some pride and luster. At least then it creates the illusion that we’re looking forward to it.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – TALE OF THE TAPE
Sami Zayn may have the fastest hand taping in the west. Seriously, that was absolutely perfect. His arm is wrapped cleaner than a Kardashian Christmas gift. Shout out to Hulu, which is also the home of Love & WWE: Bianca & Montez!
OVERRATED – THE XFL TITANIC SAILS AGAIN
Hyping the evolution of the XFL. Fool me once and all of that. But seriously, you rebranded it, why not just sell it as a new entity entirely? It’s like someone salvaged the Titanic, rebuilt it, changed the name of the ship, but are selling us on its history of failure. Third time’s the charm!
UNDER-APPRECIATED – UNQUALIFIED
Logan Paul’s great line “Qualifying matches are for unqualified people”. I love that. I’m stealing it, you know, if I ever encounter a casual situation where I too am put into a qualifying match of some sort. Hey, weirder things have happened. Paul “Triple H” Levesque played a teacher in a movie, Val Venus’ towel was more over than him, and Ready to Rumble exists. It could happen. Honorable mention of his reaction to having to go to Utah. Classic heel. Classic Utah.
OVERRATED – SAMI FLIPS OUT
Sami Zayn did more flips in this match than HGTV does in a year. I love Sami but I do think they lose their luster after a while. Also, how is he not dizzy? I do one loop on a roller coaster and I need Tums, positive affirmation and a glass of wine. You’ve defied gravity, Sami. Now let’s try getting along with it, just a bit.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – TABLE MANNERS
Huge shoutout to that tough s.o.b. of a table during the Randy Orton versus Sami Zayn match, that survived not one but two attempts to break it. Table your fears, table. I know it was traumatic but you made it, and you’re (maybe) stronger because of it.
OVERRATED – DDT TIME
Corey Graves saying “Tornado DDT and Sami (Zayn) is going to The Elimination Chamber”. No, Corey. That’s not a dominant move. Back in the ‘80s, maybe. But not now. That’s like saying “David just hit Goliath with a slingshot, Goliath is going down”. Oh…okay never mind. Maybe it was a Sharknado DDT. I hear that move has more bite. Plus it looks fintastic.
UNDER-APPRECIATED – OBVIOUS PUNS
How are we not using “The Rhodes to WrestleMania” as a tagline? WWE did you see what just flew past you? Opportunity. Nope, too late, it’s gone now.
More Over and Unders after Monday Night Rhodes…
(This is the debut column from Kevin Duncan, a/k/a Kevin Thats Weird. Find his videos with his 3.5 million follows on Tik Tok. You’ll be mesmerized. He plans to write “Over and Under” following Raw and Smackdown each week exclusively for PWTorch.com.)
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