SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
AEW RAMPAGE TV REPORT
DECEMBER 1, 2023
AT THE TARGET CENTER IN MINNEAPOLIS, MN
AIRED LIVE ON TNT
REPORT BY PATRICK MOYNAHAN, PWTORCH CONTRIBUTOR
Announcers: Excalibur and Tony Schiavone
Ring announcer: Justin Roberts
– The opening of Rampage aired as Excalibur welcomed us to the show. He was joined by Tony Schiavone.
(1) ORANGE CASSIDY & HOOK & DANHAUSEN & TRENT BERETTA vs. THE DARK ORDER (Evil Uno & Alex Reynolds) & “DADDY MAGIC” MATT MENARD & “COOL HAND” ANGELO PARKER
Dark Order, Parker, and Menard attacked before the match started. Uno cornered Danhausen but Danhausen hit him with a boot to the face, then took Uno down before he took down the charging Reynolds. All eight men entered the ring for a face off, then went to blows. The heels were thrown into the center of the ring as the faces went in for a group hug. The heel team kicked them with a low blow but the faces fought back and had their hug in the center of the ring.
Hook attacked Parker in the corner as Menard came to his aid. Parker and Menard double teamed Hook until Trent came in to even the odds. Cassidy then came in to take out Menard but Uno took him out. Danhausen was in next, and hit a release German suplex on Uno. Reynolds flew into take out Danhausen, and was then taken out by Hook. Uno and Hook were the legal men as Hook took Uno down with a huge suplex.
Wheeler Yuta’s music hit which distracted Hook and allowed Menard to attack him from behind. Yuta joined commentary for the remainder of the match. Uno and his team made quick tags as they cut the ring off from Hook and kept him in their corner. [c]
Hook took Parker down with a leaping clothesline before making the tag to Trent. Uno also tagged in as Trent went to town on him, then Reynolds. Trent took Uno down with a suplex before getting kicked by Reynolds. Trent caught Reynolds off the ropes for a backdrop suplex. Cassidy tagged in and kicked away at both Uno and Reynolds. Cassidy took both opponents down then hit a Stundog Millionaire on Uno. Uno fired back with Something Evil for two before Trent broke up the pin.
Reynolds had Cassidy on the top rope until Trent ran over and hit Reynolds with a release German suplex. Danhausen and Menard each tagged in and met in the center of the ring. Danhausen took out Jake Hager’s purple hat. Hager hit the ring but spilled to the outside as Menard and Parker took the hat from Danhausen. Hook came in from behind and locked in Red Rum as Danhausen rolled up Danhausen for the win.
WINNERS: Orange Cassidy & Hook & Danhausen & Trent Beretta in 10:00
(Moynahan’s Take: This was chaotic at times, with a total disregard for any consistent legal tagging. It was fine for what it was; a fun, action-packed kickoff to the show. No more, no less.)
– Renee was backstage with Saraya, Ruby Soho, and Anna Jay. Saraya told Soho to stop talking as she praised Jay. Saraya said they had something in common that needed to be extinguished as Parker arrived. He said he would accompany them in their match until Jay shut him down and walked off.
– Tony Schiavone was in the ring and welcomed Sting and Ric Flair. Tony started by hyping Sting’s final match at Revolution on March 3, 2024, then mentioned Sting’s undefeated streak in AEW. Sting took the mic from Tony and spoke directly to the crowd about his great memories in MN. Sting talked about his time with Lex Luger and wrestling Bam Bam Bigelow, which got a nice reaction. He thanked the fans for the memories as well as Tony Schiavone and Ric Flair.
Flair took the mic and talked about still being alive after all of these years. Flair mentioned Dusty Rhodes, Ricky Steamboat, and Sting as three guys that meant a lot to him. He talked about this being an incredible ride with Sting as he ends his career. Flair told the crowd they would dance all night and go “AEW strong,” then gave a few woos to the crowd as Tony wrapped things up with another plug for Revolution in March. [c]
– Renee was backstage with Kris Statlander, Hikaru Shida, and Skye Blue. She asked them about fighting their way back after losing titles and title shots respectively. Statlander talked about losing her title without even getting pinned, which annoyed Blue. Shida had to calm them down and told them to take the anger out on their opponents tonight.
(2) POWERHOUSE HOBBS & KONOSUKE TAKESHITA & KYLE FLETCHER vs. RENNY D & JAH-C & KIT SACKETT
Hobbs started things off and took a few shots from his opponent but quickly squashed him against the ropes. His two other opponents ran in but Hobbs quickly dispatched them as well. Fletcher and Takeshita came in and then three drove each opponent to the mat as Hobbs covered for the win.
WINNERS: Powerhouse Hobbs & Konosuke Takeshita & Kyle Fletcher in 0:30
– After the match, Don Callis took the mic and addressed Chris Jericho and Kenny Omega. He called them potentially the most dominant team of all time. Callis said the only thing that mattered to him and his family was winning, and they would continue to dominate everyone until there was nowhere to hide for either Jericho or Omega.
(Moynahan’s Take: YOUR RAMPAGE SQUASH OF THE WEEK.)
– Prince Nana was backstage with Brian Cage and The Workhorsemen. Nana was hyped and told Cage he was hiring the Workhorsemen tonight to team with Cage. He told them it would be a huge opportunity for them to prove things to both Swerve Strickland and The Mogul Embassy. Nana said he believed in them before walking away.
(3) KRIS STATLANDER & HIKARU SHIDA & SKYE BLUE vs. THE OUTCASTS (Saraya & Ruby Soho) & ANNA JAY
Jay and Statlander kicked things off for their teams. Shida made a quick tag as she and Statlander double teamed Jay. Shida went for a quick pin but Jay kicked out. Blue tagged in and kept the offensive momentum going by taking it to Jay. Statlander tagged in Blue blindly, then Blue returned the favor. The two played games by going back and forth until Shida tagged in. Saraya was the other legal woman and took a kick to the back of the head by Shida. Shida dropped Saraya then suplexed a charging Soho onto Saraya. Shida covered for two. Blue tagged in but Saraya stopped her in her tracks to finally gain some momentum for her team. [c]
Statlander had Saraya pinned until things were broken up at two. Jay and Saraya worked well together as they double teamed Statlander. Jay locked in Queen Slayer but Statlander reversed for a back suplex. Things broke down from here as everyone hit the ring and traded moves on one another. Soho made the tag and accidentally kicked Soho as Statlander pulled her into the way. Blue hit Code Blue on Soho for the win.
WINNERS: Kris Statlander & Hikaru Shida & Skye Blue in 7:00
– After the match, the heel team was in disarray and visibly angry at one another.
(Moynahan’s Take: This was fine but a good portion happened during the commercial break. Like I said last week, Mr. Khan needs some help booking this Women’s division. I beg you, Tony.)
– A video package aired showing the highlights thus far from the Continental Classic. [c]
(4) PENTA EL ZERO MIEDO & EL HIJO DEL VIKINGO & KOMANDER vs. THE WORKHORSEMEN (JD Drake & Anthony Henry) & BRIAN CAGE
Cage and Komander started things off. Cage caught Komander and threw him across the ring by the neck. Penta tagged in and flew off the top with a crossbody on Cage. Henry tagged in and kicked away at Penta which took him down. Vikingo flew in after making the tag and hit a running elbow strike on Henry in the corner. Vikingo came off the ropes with an inverted rana. Henry rolled to the outside after tagging Drake. Drake asked Vikingo to chop him, and Vikingo obliged. Drake missed one of his own but caught Vikingo on another attempt.
Vikingo took Drake down as everyone hit the ring. Komander took flight and hit a dropkick on Cage who went to the outside with his partners. Penta and Komander flew over the top rope as Vikingo got caught up on the rope itself. Everyone battled on the outside. [c]
Penta single-handedly took out all three opponents before tagging in Komander. Komander hit a missile dropkick on Drake before Vikingo flew into the ring and hit his own. Komander and Vikingo double teamed Cage before Penta came off the top with a double foot stomp. Penta covered Cage for two. Cage hit a rising knee on Penta, then deflected Komander out of midair. Drake and Henry entered the ring and double teamed Komander. Henry covered for a pin until Vikingo broke things up. Vikingo flew off the ropes and hit a nasty looking takedown of Cage before Penta hit Henry with Made in Japan.
Cage tried to hit Komander with a suplex until Henry accidentally hit Cage. Cage got ticked off and attacked Henry, then walked away from his team with Prince Nana. Penta hit Fear Factor on Henry then tagged in Komander who hit a rope walk moonsault. Vikingo then tagged in and hit his 630 senton finish for the win.
WINNERS: Penta El Zero Miedo & El Hijo del Vikingo & Komander in 10:00
(Moynahan’s Take: Not surprisingly this was action-packed. A tad messy in spots but just take a “turn off your brain and enjoy” approach when watching this one.)
FINAL THOUGHTS: A slight rebound of an episode this week after last week’s significant downturn. That said, nothing compares to the recent string of live shows. The most surprising thing tonight was seeing the Don Callis Family on Rampage after not seeing any of them in action for a few weeks. A harmless squash win for them, but still seems a bit odd to me. Also, what’s up with all of the multi-person matches? Not for nothing, but with all of these three-plus member teams as of late, where is any semblance of a Trios division? I digress. Nothing here is must-see but if you have time, go out of your way to watch the main event for some fun action. Until next week, stay safe everyone!
RECOMMENDED NEXT: AEW DYNAMITE RESULTS (11/29): Amin’s “alt perspective” report on Christian-Copeland, Continental Classic, Julia vs. Sakura, Flair-Sting-Schiavone segment
OR CHECK THIS OUT AT PROWRESTLING.NET: Powell’s AEW Dynamite Hit List: Swerve Strickland vs. Jay White, Mark Briscoe vs. Rush, and Jon Moxley vs. Jay Lethal in Continental Classic tournament matches, Christian Cage and Adam Copeland
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