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KELLER’S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT
MAY 28, 2021
AT THE UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH FLORIDA IN “THUNDERDOME”
AIRED ON FOX BROADCAST NETWORK
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee
Ring Announcer: Greg Hamilton
[HOUR ONE]
-The WWE Then, Now, Forever brand stamp video aired.
-They went backstage to the Usos getting psyched up excitedly for their tag match. Then the mood changed when Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman walked in. Reigns smiled at Jey, then asked Jimmy if he’s ready. Reigns asked what the gameplan is. “I don’t know what your intentions are,” he said. “What is the end game here?” Jimmy said this is how they’re going to make the family proud. He said they’d put their titles next to his title and he can’t wait. Reigns said in a chill low-key tone, “It looks like you’ve got it figured out. I’m happy for you. Good luck.”
Jimmy walked away. Then Reigns asked Jey why he’s letting his brother talk for him now. Jey said even though he’s teaming with Jimmy tonight, he assured Reigns he’s with him. Reigns said, “Maybe you should tell him.”
(Keller’s Analysis: Reigns was made for this role. The dynamic with all four in that segment was top shelf.)
-Cole introduced the show as the camera panned the ThunderDome. (Since they don’t say it anymore, I’d like to remind everyone it is critically acclaimed and award winning.)
-As the Street Profits made their ring entrance, Cole said the winner of their tag match could earn a future tag team title opportunity. They went to Cole and McAfee at ringside. Cole commented on McAfee’s shirt. Then he hyped the opening tag match. McAfee plugged Rey & Dominik Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler & Robert Roode in their first Smackdown Tag Team Title match later.
The Profits talked mid-ring. Montez Ford said he has a pep in his step. Angelo Dawkins said he noticed. Ford said they were flattered that the Usos chose to challenge them. He said they’ve been down since Day One. They danced and sang about how they’ve been with the Usos all along. Ford said it’s been one entire calendar year since Jimmy’s injury. He said Roman lives in Jey’s head rent-free. (I thought we agreed that phrase expired in 2020 after being grotesquely overused for three years.)
The Usos then made their ring entrance. They entered the ring and exchanged some words. Jimmy said it doesn’t matter if he’s been on the shelf for one year or ten years, the best damn tag team in the business is back. Jimmy said they’re the definition of a true tag team – back to back tag team of the year, soon to be seven-time tag team champions. Jey said if they say another word about Reigns, they’ll pay a price because this is family business. The Usos said this dream match is going to become their nightmare.
Dawkins asked if they think they’re some kind of stepping stone. He said they used to run the tag division, but they run it now. Jey said if they want the smoke, they’ll bring it to them in the Uso Penitentiary. [c]
-Cole and McAfee plugged more dates for live WWE events in July.
(1) THE STREET PROFITS vs. JEY & JIMMY USO
A few minutes in, the Profits knocked the Usos to ringside and then threw Jey into the time keepers area and Jimmy over the announce desk. Cole and McAfee fled the scene as Cole exclaimed, “The Street Profits are rockin’ and rollin’ on Smackdown!” [c]
The Usos were in control in the ring. Ford fought back against Jey, but Jey regained control and locked on a chinlock. Ford escaped and landed a step-up enzugiri, knocking Jey out of the ring. Jimmy held Ford back from tagging, but Ford landed an enzuigiri on him, also. McAfee corrected Cole who called it a “step-up” enzuigiri. When Ford leaped to tag Dawkins, Jey pulled Dawkins off the ring apron. Jimmy gave Ford a Samoan Drop for a believable near fall. They cut to another break. [c]
Back from the break, Jey was in control against Ford. Jey avoided a frog splash. Dawkins got the hot-tag. He knocked Jimmy off the top turnbuckle. Ford then ran and leaped over Jimmy and flip-dove onto Jey at ringside. Jimmy superkicked Dawkins for a near fall seconds later. Jimmy charged at Dawkins, but Dawkins knocked him out of mid-air and landed a neckbreaker for a near fall. Both were down and slow to get up.
Dawkins landed a spinebuster and tagged in Ford. Ford went for a frog splash but Jey pulled Jimmy out of the path. Ford crashed. Jimmy then superkicked Ford and scored the pin. Cole called it an upset. McAfee said they’re the best tag team in the business and they’re back.
WINNERS: The Usos in 22:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: Really good tag match, and no real hint of rust with the Usos. They did a good job building this up with a lengthy promo by the Profits before the match and some back and forth with the Usos.)
-Megan Morant interviewed Ziggler and Roode backstage. She asked why they think they can win tonight when they lost to them at Backlash. Ziggler said the question was a little rude. Roode said their strategy at Backlash backfired because Rey’s paternal instinct kicked in. He said they went back to the drawing board and tonight will be different. Ziggler said they are a couple aces and Dirty Damn Dawgs who will once again become Smackdown Tag Team Champions. He flung his hair and walked away.
-Tamina and Natalya made their way to the ring with their newly won Women’s Tag Team Titles. Cole said the Riott Squad will face them next. [c]
(2) NATALYA & TAMINA vs. RIOTT SQUAD (Ruby Riott & Liv Morgan) – Non-Title match
The match was joined in progress. Cole said Riott Squad were clamoring for this opportunity. Natalya went for a double sharpshooter on both Riott Squad members. They kicked her off. Liv blocked Tamina from entering, but Tamina shoved Liv onto Riott who was covering Natalya for a near fall. Natalya tagged in a fresh Tamina, who went after Riott. They battled mid-ring with an exchange of strikes. Tamina overpowered Riott and forearmed her into the ropes. She climbed to the top rope next, but Natalya DISTRACTED her briefly with a battle with Liv at ringside. Riott climbed up to take Tamina to the mat, but Tamina blocked her armdrag and head-butted her down. Tamina then landed a Superfly Splash for the win.
WINNERS: Tamina & Natalya in 6:00.
-The Usos were celebrating. Jimmy told WWE official Adam Pearce that they showed all the doubters and all the haters they didn’t miss a step. Pearce said it’s tough to doubt the Usos. Jimmy asked for a title match next week. Pearce said to consider it official. Jey seemed less enthusiastic and a bit emotionally torn as Jimmy kept touting their win excitedly. Jimmy ran off happily as Jey took a deep breath.
-Biacna Belair made her ring entrance. They showed an augmented reality billboard advertising Belair vs. Carmella was up next. [c]
-As Belair twirled her hair in the ring as her music played, they cut backstage to Kayla Braxton interviewing Carmella. Carmella was applying lip gloss when Braxton asked her strategy. Carmella interrupted and laughed at her olive green dress. She said Belair won at Backlash in a shady way, and she loves it. She giggled and touted her big wins in her career. She said she’s going to end Belair’s fairy tale career right now.
(Keller’s Analysis: Very very scripted sounding and overacted every step of the way.)
[HOUR TWO]
(3) BIANCA BELAIR vs. CARMELLA
After Carmella’s ring entrance, Bayley interrupted with a mic and said, “Ding Dong!” She stepped over the barricade at ringside and joined the announcers. Carmella head-scissored Belair out of the ring. When Carmella went after her at ringside, Belair checked her to the ground. Then she pressed her and tossed her through the ropes into the ring.
Carmella yanked on Belair’s hair and punched her in the head, then sitout face-planted Belair onto the ring apron. Bayley said this isn’t Carmella’s time because she hasn’t had her rematch after Belair cheated to beat her at Backlash. She said Belair is great, but she isn’t all she’s been hyped up to be. She said she will prove she is no. 1 still. Belair made a comeback and knocked Carmella’s head into top turnbuckles.
Carmella blocked a third attempt and leaped off the top rope with a crossbody. Belair caught her and landed a fallaway slam into a kip up. Then she landed a handspring moonsault for a near fall. Carmella avoided a charging Belair, who went shoulder-first into the corner. Bayley said she’s really enjoying this match. Carmella kicked Belair and scored a near fall. Belair schoolgirled Carmella and bridged into a jackknife, but Belair rolled out of it. Belair them gave her a KOD for the win.
WINNER: Belair in 6:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: Cole didn’t at first recognize Belair doing her finisher, and it took a bit away from the drama of the finish that Cole didn’t identify it as a finisher. No big deal, though. Bayley seemed to regress or return a bit to her prior persona that she seemed to be moving away from. That’s fine, too. It’s just noteworthy she went back to “Ding Dong” and being obnoxious in the way she was being before WrestleMania.)
-After the match, Bayley stood on the announce desk and laughed at Belair.
-Morant interviewed Rey & Dominik. Dominik said winning the belts with his dad was euphoric and there is no tag team in the world who can top them. Rey said he’s proud of Dominik and loves him. They hugged. Rey kissed the side of his head. Rey told Dominik he loves him.
-Seth Rollins made his ring entrance, wearing a loud green and purple suit. McAfee said he was looking amazing and fresh. [c]
-Seth was in the ring as his music faded and a “You suck!” chant thundered over the sound system. Seth called for Cesaro to get to the ring to finish things right now. “Come on, get out here!” he yelled. “Let’s get this over with.” Seth cackled when Cesaro didn’t answer. “Of course he’s not here tonight to swing me,” he said. “He’s not here to disrespect me or to look right past me. He’s not here to ruin the greatest day of the year, my birthdayyyyyy!”
Seth said he wanted to remind him and everyone else exactly why he can’t be there tonight to experience the festivities. He threw to the big screen for a clip of what he did to him last week. Seth pretended that the footage was even disturbing for him to watch. A “You suck!” chant rang over the speakers. Seth said his team has obtained some exclusive audio direct from Cesaro’s hospital room. He said this footage would be their little secret. A heart rate monitor played audio of “fart” noises. Seth let out a guttural laugh. “How good was that?!” he asked Cole. McAfee said it might be a HIPAA violation, but it was funny.
Seth said Cesaro pushed him to a point where his anger and frustration got the better of him and he blacked out. He said life isn’t black and white, and as a man of integrity and responsibility, they have to place some of the blame on the fans watching at home. He looked into the hard camera and said they are the ones who brainwashed Cesaro into thinking it was okay to disrespect him and believing he could look right through him and that he deserved opportunities he simply did not earn. He said if Cesaro never steps foot in the ring ever again, the blame is on Cesaro the the fans themselves. “My hands are clean,” he said. Your hand are dirty and filthy. “Happy birthday to me,” he said. He then began singing to himself and dancing. He dropped the mic and let out a gigantic smile.
(Keller’s Analysis: Seth is becoming a younger version of Mr. Furley from “Three’s Company” with his outfits and his strutting and his laughing and snortling at his own jokes.)
-They showed Kevin Owens walking down the hall. [c]
(Keller’s Analysis: As a side note, they aired a “Hire Heroes USA” commercial starring Montez Ford. That version of Ford is so much more appealing and marketable than the cartoonish singing dancing over-the-top character WWE has him playing. He was grounded, real, serious, and charismatic. It’s so frustrating when you see WWE wrestlers outside of the cartoonish direction of Vince McMahon caricaturizing everyone, whether it’s a commercial like that or Talking Smack. There’s room for characters in pro wrestling, for sure, but some people are just stars without amping it up to ridiculous degrees.) [c]
(4) APOLLO CREWS (w/Commander Azeez) vs. KEVIN OWENS – Non-Title match
As Owens’s music faded, Cole called him “relentless.” Cole said Owens has to knock off the champ to perhaps earn a future IC Title opportunity. Crews and Azeez then made their full ring entrance. “You’re looking at greatness here,” said McAfee, referring to Crews and Azeez. Owens landed a quick cannonball in the corner and then a top rope senton for a near fall less than a minute in. Crews rolled to ringside. Crews snapped Owens neck-first over the top rope and then climbed to the top. KO met him there and knocked him off balance. Owens landed a superkcick seconds later and went for a Pop-Up Powerbomb. Crews avoided that, but Owens hit a stunner. Azeez jabbed KO in the throat during the cover with is Nigerian Nail. The ref called for a quick DQ. Cole said Owens “was going to win this match.” He said he was gasping for air instead.
WINNER: Owens via DQ in 2:00.
-Officials went to tend to KO who continued to gasp for breath at ringside, really selling the Nigerian Spike from Azeez.
(Keller’s Analysis: To rev up KO as the IC Challenger to Crews, since they’ve moved Big E to a program with Aleister Black, they decided to build it up with an injury angle and really lean into the lethal nature of Azeez’s signature move. I’m interested in KO’s promo next week before his match. I hope WWE gives him a chance to really build up next week’s IC Title match.)
-Backstage, Heyman approached Reigns. He presented him with his “right-hand man.” Jey entered the picture and sat next to Reigns. Reigns asked if what Jey wants is a tag title shot with his brother. “Why didn’t you tell me that, then?” Reigns asked. “What happened to ‘we’? Think about this. Everything that we’ve been through over these months, all I’ve ever wanted is the best for you. That’s all that’s ever mattered to me, is doing right by you, doing right by our family. We’ll figure it out for your brother, but you’re Main Event Jey Uso now. When we go according to my plan, what happens? We rule Smackdown. As soon as your brother comes back, what happens? You’re relegated to the opening match. I just don’t want you to go back to a place where people look at you and say ‘which one are you?'” Jey said he’s never thought of it that way. Reigns said, “I think you should, because your brother’s not.”
(Keller’s Analysis: Just a great segment, creating a whole layer of drama as Jey has to continue to decide how to navigate the difficult position Reigns is putting him in.)
-Rick Boogs played electric guitar off the stage. He introduced himself and said, “My name is Rick Boogs and I came to rock with the King of Strong Style, Shinsuke Nakamura!” He screeched as he said Nakamura’s name. He then played Nakamura’s entrance theme as Nakamura made his way out, still wearing Corbin’s crown. McAfee rocked out at the announce desk. Cole looked like he was being pelted with rotten fruit as he tried to avoid McAfee’s flailing arms. They cut to a break. [c]
-A sponsored highlight package aired of the Nakamura-Corbin feud so far.
(5) SHINSUKE NAKAMURA (w/Rick Boogs) vs. CHAD GABLE (w/Otis)
Before the match, Otis snuck in and powerslammed Nakamura. The ref checked on Nakamura who said it was okay to ring the bell. Gable immediately gave him a belly-to-belly and scored a near fall. Nakamura came back with some kicks. Gable applied an armbar while hanging over the top rope. Otis cheered him on. Back in the ring, Nakamura surprised Gable with a sleeper, but his arm was still sore. Gable armdragged Nakamura into the corner turnbuckles, then quickly went for a top rope moonsault. Nakamura moved, but Gable landed on his feet. Nakamura landed a spinning wheel kick. Meanwhile, Corbin came to ringside and took his crown back. He said, “This is my crown, I earned it!” Nakamura countered a Gable roll-up for a near fall. He popped up and landed a Kinshasa for the three count. Otis was late with a save.
WINNER: Nakamura in 4:00.
-Nakamura realized Corbin took his crown back. As Corbin gloated in the aisle, Boogs hit Corbin from behind. Nakamura stomped on Corbin and took the crown back. He relished in placing it back on his head. Boogs played guitar as Nakamura celebrated with poses.
(Keller’s Analysis: I’d rather Gable and Otis be more protected than this, but Gable was good in his role here. I didn’t have Rick Boogs revving up Nakamura’s push on my 2021 Bingo Card. You could see Corbin having his crown stolen back coming from a mile away, but it was still satisfying because, well, Corbin is Corbin.)
-Backstage, KO was on the trainer’s table. He told Pearce he wants a match with Crews. Pearce said he can have a match with Crews next week, and Azeez will be banned from ringside.
-Backstage Dominik approached Rey who was praying. Rey asked for a moment. Dominik walked away. [c]
-Rey was hurt as a ref and trainer checked on him. Dominik returned to tend to his dad.
-In the ring, Robert Roode & Dolph Ziggler played dumb as ring introductions began for the match. Ziggler said they had nothing to do with that. Roode said they want to win fair and square. Ziggler said if they can’t compete, then it’s a forfeit. He argued his case with the referee. He said if the Mysterios can’t compete, that’s on the Mysterios. Roode said Dominik isn’t going to wrestle alone, obviously. Meanwhile, Dominik said he was going to wrestle. Ziggler asked if that “little tiny itty bitty kiddie” is really going to be allowed to face them alone. “This is child abuse!” he said. Dominik’s ring entrance began. Cole asked if he was going to “go it alone.”
(Keller’s Analysis: Man, if only there was a camera filming Rey backstage, we could have seen what happened!) [c]
(6) REY & DOMINIK MYSTERIO vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER & ROBERT ROODE – WWE Smackdown Tag Team Title match
Back from the break, Dominik was pacing in his corner, ready to pounce when the bell rang. He charged at Ziggler in the ring and took a few shots at Roode. Ziggler then caught Dominik with a dropkick. Roode tagged in and scored a two count on Dominik a minute later.
The heel duo worked over Dominik’s knee for a while. McAfee said Roode & Ziggler have been around far too long to be impressed by Dominik, even after all he’s done to them in recent weeks. Dominik avoided a leaping kneedrop by Roode, but Ziggler tagged in and stayed on Dominik, who had no one to tag out to. He fought out of the heel corner and backdropped Ziggler to the floor. Cole said he was doing everything he could to stay alive in this match. He sling-shot himself onto both Roode and Ziggler on the floor. He threw Ziggler back into the ring and set up a 619. Roode tripped him running the ropes. He turned to kick Roode, then set up the 619 again. Ziggler ducked and then hit a sloppy Fameasser for a near fall. They double-slammed Dominik for another near fall.
As Roode lifted Dominik onto his shoulders, Rey’s music played and he walked onto the stage. That DISTRACTED Roode and Ziggler. Dominik rolled up Roode for a three count.
WINNERS: The Mysterios in 8:00 to retain the Smackdown Tag Team Titles.
-The Usos immediately came out to their music and had a staredown with the Mysterios. McAfee said two families battle in one week for the Smackdown Tag Team Titles. They showed Heyman staring at Reigns backstage as Reigns stared blankly ahead, soaking up Jey’s decision to go ahead with the tag title match with his brother next week.
(Keller’s Analysis: The Reigns family saga continues to be the focus in clever ways, and the build to the Usos challenging the Mysteiros next week was really well done. I think there’s going to be a lot of anticipation among Smackdown viewers for that next week. Dominik continues to look like he belongs out there, carrying his end of that two-on-one battle as a valiant underdog fighting against the odds to scoring an opportunistic victory. If WWE saved their distraction finishes for when they really counted, this would have been a more satisfying instance of it happening given the backstory.)
FINAL THOUGHTS: They did a good job setting up next week’s double-header of main events – Owens challenging Crews and the Usos challenging the Mysterios. It was strange not seeing any foll0w-up with the Aleister Black-Big E angle that closed out last week’s show. Not sure the rationale for that.
Ready for another take on this episode? Check out Nate Lindberg’s alt-perspective detailed report and analysis HERE.
I just hope Kevin Owens’ cervix is ok!