SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
BEING THE ELITE EP. 206 – “Gig”
POSTED ON YOUTUBE.COM
JUNE 1, 2020
REPORT BY ZACH GRAHAM, PWTORCH CONTRIBUTOR
Watch it HERE…
– Brandon Cutler walks into an office labeled “EVPs” and says hello to Kenny Omega, Matt Jackson, Nick Jackson, Hangman Page, and Matt Hardy who were having a conversation. Brandon said he needs Kenny, Nick, and Matt (Jackson) for some media stuff. Matt yells and all three protest having to do it. Omega throws a fit and says he doesn’t want to. They ask Cutler to come back in five minutes and he reluctantly agrees as he leaves the room.
A “5 Minutes Later…” graphic flashes.
Cutler reenters the room as they’re all moaning in pain. Matt is finishing applying fake blood to his forehead, Kenny is holding his stomach in pain, and Nick is on the floor looking disoriented. Nick yelled that it was QT Marshall. Cutler looks at Kenny’s stomach and there is a small patch of ketchup on his stomach. Cutler yells that his blood is coagulating. He looks at Matt’s face and Nick’s right arm and they’re covered in “blood” as well. Cutler turns to Hangman to ask him if he saw what happened. Page looks up from his phone and casually says that someone attacked them. Matt Hardy said he just came back into the room and he thinks it was the Horsemen and blamed Arn Anderson and Tully Blanchard. Nick stumbles to his feet and says he can still do media. Cutler says no somebody else can do media as they all pretend to plead with him to go do it. Cutler leaves to go get the doctor.
– Being the Elite open aired.
– Kenny Omega laughs off the idea of doing media while holding a ketchup packet. Kenny said it came in handy and said it’s thanks to catering, which was awesome. Nick held up a bottle of fake vampire blood that he used for the blood on his arm. A razor blade is shown in Matt’s hand as they ask him what he used to fake the bleeding. He seems dizzy and said he used vampire blood too. Kenny asked Nick if he let Matt use his fake blood and Nick said no. Kenny and Hardy wants to see Matt’s head, Matt tosses the razor blade onto the table in front of him as Kenny yells at him for blading. Kenny and Hardy start yelling at him, Kenny called him names and Nick attempted to clean up the blood. Matt Hardy yelled at Matt Jackson asking him if he “gigged.”
Broken Matt appeared behind Matt, who had closed his eyes in his chair. It appeared as though Broken Matt had stopped time. Broken Matt explained what gig means. Broken Matt said gig is when a performer uses a blade to intentionally bleed. The point of bleeding is to get sympathy on the wrestler in the context of a wrestling match or sometimes get out of duties he must perform like media. As Hardy explained this, Matt Jackson slowly fell out of his chair and onto the floor.
– Matt and Nick were standing in the bleachers at Daily’s Place and Matt complained about how humid it was. Nick said that they did a Dynamite taping the day before where they got to team with Matt Hardy for the first time. They said Hardy named their trio the Spot Monkeys. Nick said Hardy told him to do the poetry in motion move with him, but he’d never practiced it before, but he did it. Matt said the biggest news from Dynamite was the arrival of FTR. He said that’s been brewing for years and what a moment it was when they showed up. Matt said he can only imagine what it would’ve been like for that to happen with a crowd full of people, but it still felt special.
– A voiceover introduced that it was time for a “Public Swole Announcement.” Big Swole was standing on the field after the Stadium Stampede match at Double or Nothing. She said she can’t believe she has to say this, but there is a million things you can put in your throat and Lysol is NOT one of them. She said do not put Lysol down your throat. Do not consume it, don’t take a shot of it, don’t do a spray of it. Get some Tic Tacs or something and get your life together. She walked off screen.
– Brandon Cutler zoomed in on a placard outside a door that read “Female Locker Room.” He sighed and said “this is where they said they’d be” and hesitatingly walked in. He entered to see Chuck Taylor, Trent, and Orange Cassidy in the locker room sitting down. Cassidy had stuffed himself into a locker with his feet above his head somehow. Cutler said he was told they had an idea for a BTE bit. Trent said “umm…” and held it for 10-15 seconds.
– TH2’s entrance graphic was shown and their music played. Angelico popped up on screen. He said he wanted to continue along the theme of the injustices they’ve suffered at the hands of AEW. His example being the inaugural tag team championship tournament. The tournament graphic was shown featuring seven AEW tag teams with Dark Order receiving a bye to the second round, TH2 was not in that tournament. TH2 said every team in AEW was gifted a spot in the tournament, except them. Angelico asked how they could possible justify that, which they can’t, all they can do is make excuses. He focused his attention to the two teams he feels are the biggest embarrassments to the AEW Tag Team Divison: Dark Order and Jurassic Express. Jack Evans popped up and called them the Jurassic Farce. Evans said these are perfect examples of the “picture perfect pro wrestling persecution” that they have to go through on a weekly basis. Evans talked about their match with Dark Order and Jurassic Express as highlights were shown. Evans said they turned that wrestling match into a warzone. He called Dark Order a group of degenerate cultists. When addressing Jurassic Express he said it features a “kooky kid” (Marko Stunt) and a dap delusional dinosaur. He said these are both examples of proof that they are surrounded by heretics. Evans rambled some more about punishing Jurassic Express and Dark Order and vowed to beat them in a match. Angelico popped back up and said they won’t stop until everybody knows “when it comes to talent, there are many, when it comes to the best there are a few, but when you talk about the greatest, then there’s only TH2.”
– Kenny Omega asked Brandon Cutler if he was filming this. Omega said that Colt Cabana wants to be a star, but on this episode of BTE, we’re going to see Omega take his right fist and give Colt a big knuckle sandwich. Omega then walked into a room and said hello to a couple people and asked if they knew where Cabana was. Omega opened a door and saw someone standing in the hallway with a towel on his head. Omega thought it was Cabana and turned him around to see it wasn’t Cabana, it was Chris Harrington. Harrington yelled at Omega asking him what the hell he was doing. Omega apologized as Harrington asked Omega if he was going to punch him. Harrington threatened Kenny and said if he does this again he’s going to beat his ass. Kenny cowered against the wall and apologized profusely. Cabana, who was hiding behind a wall that stuck out in the hallway, walked over to Harrington and took back his towel and jacket. Omega stood up and asked Harrington if he was friends with Cabana, Harrington challenged Omega again and Omega quickly backed down and apologized again. Omega yelled that he’s going to get Colt next week and told Cutler to cut the camera as he walked off upset.
– Trent, Chuck Taylor, and Orange Cassidy were standing in a locker room bathroom in their street clothes leaning against separate walls as they were all trying to think. Trent said he’s got nothing. Taylor said he’s going to pop into his office and he’ll come out with an idea. Taylor then entered one of the shower stalls and pulled the curtain to hide himself. After ten seconds or so, he emerged again and said he’s the new sex symbol of AEW and everyone in both locker rooms loves him. So, he wants to get a minivan and drive up to the railing and crash into it. When he gets out of the car, people will go crazy for him. Trent said he doesn’t like that idea and Taylor went back into his shower “office.”
Taylor immediately came back through the curtain with a new idea. His idea is that Jon Moxley will put his championship on the line against him, Cassidy and Trent will distract the ref over and over. Trent cut him off saying this is a match idea, not a BTE skit idea. Taylor went back behind the curtain for a third time.
Taylor hid behind the curtain for a second, came back out and said he has nothing. Trent started brainstorming out loud. Cassidy stopped him and said he needs to get into the shower first before announcing his idea. Trent refuses, then starts proposing his idea. He says he’s a longneck dinosaur and his mom dies early in the story line, then he travels through prehistoric life meeting other child dinosaurs along the way. Taylor interrupts and says that’s The Land before Time. Cassidy goes into the other shower stall and closes the curtain. As Cassidy closes the shower curtain, Taylor says he knows what he’s going to propose, it’s going to be Fast and the Furious. Taylor mocks Cassidy saying “I drive a car fast, I have a family, and I drink Coronas.” Cassidy comes out from the shower and says “okay, so I have a family and I drink Corona…” Taylor throws his hands up and leaves.
– Dustin Rhodes knocks on a curtain covered door and calls out to the person behind it. He questions what he’s doing there and says how can I take advice from someone in a blonde wig and a robe and asks what he’s even doing there. Benign Bodega appears and tells Dustin there are no refunds and asks him to sit with him. Dustin said he wants to ask him a question, what’s with Allie? Bodega said ah yes the bunny. Dustin confirmed that’s who he was talking about. Bodega said she only likes carrots, not apples. Dustin was excited and relieved and asked if that means she doesn’t like QT Marshall. Bodega said he did not say that. Bodega said he sees shattered dreams in the future, Dustin asked if he means he’s going to wrestle someone. Bodega said the shattered dreams are for Dustin. Dustin stood up and asked why he’s even doing this. As he walked away he said maybe he should just dress like a Christmas tree like he used to. The camera panned back to Bodega and Allie was sitting next to him playing with her hair and staring at him.
– A recap video aired of Private Party hanging out in the backyard over the past several weeks of BTE aired including their brief fight with their friend EJ, them calling out Adam Page, being attacked by the bear, and the part one of their match against Bonez and the Bear. The recap ended with them getting in the car, with the Bear as the driver.
They jumped out of the car and ran back into the yard. Their friend, who had been playing Animal Crossing on his Nintendo, dropped into the city at night. He said he hates when this happens and said a combination of controller buttons to unlock a cheat, his Nintendo Switch. The graphics on screen were very similar to that of a Grand Theft Auto video game.
Quen and Kassidy were in the back yard and tried to take a second to calm down. The Bear came flying over the top fence and took down Kassidy who fell into Quen as well. The Bear punched and stomped on them both before turning his attention to the money. The Bear climbed the ladder, but his arms weren’t long enough to reach. Quen and Kassidy both threw a chair at Bear to knock him off the ladder. Quen put Bear on his shoulders and Kassidy climbed on the ladder for a move. Kassidy gave Bear two thumbs down before he was going to do whatever he was planning. The Bear leaned in and head butt Kassidy in the crotch then hit Quen with a rana in the grass. The Bear sat up and shot some type of laser beam from its eyes into the chest of Kassidy, who was still sitting on the ladder. Bonez then appeared from behind the garage and started to climb the ladder to grab the money. The doorbell sound rang again and Bonez went to answer it. Bonez opened the fence and the friend who had been transported to the video game world appeared. He threw the Switch to Bonez then super kicked him and hit him with a rana. He went to leave while the Bear climbed onto the roof of the house. The Bear jumped off and took out everyone in the back yard. The Bear then climbed to the top rope on Bonez’s back and pulled down the money for the win. Credits aired ending the segment.
– Broken Matt Hardy was in the EVP room with both Jackson brothers and Kenny Omega. He was talking about meeting Abraham Lincoln with Hangman Page walked in. Page asked to talk to Kenny and Hardy said hello to “the man that hangs.” Page waived at him. Hardy continued telling stories to the Young Bucks. Page asked Kenny who that was and Kenny said it’s Matt. Page called Matt and Nick Jackson over next. Page asked them who the hell that was, they also said it’s Matt Hardy. Broken Matt began yelling in the background as Page tried to understand that it was actually Matt Hardy. Matt Jackson tried explaining to Page that Hardy has multiple personalities, that’s why he’s different every time Page sees him. Matt Jackson then quickly talked about burying Hardy’s old essence, which released Demascus, which is who Hardy is currently. Page seemed very confused as Broken Matt did his delete motion in the background.
Broken Matt interrupted and asked if everything was okay. The Bucks and Omega said absolutely everything is fine, Hangman looked uneasy. Broken Matt then introduced himself to Hangman Page, who he said he hasn’t officially met until now. Hardy called him the man that hangs and Page tried to tell him that it’s Hangman. Hangman didn’t like this change, but Hardy explained that he is just using the lexicon of 3000 AD. Hardy smiled and tapped Page on the shoulder as a sign of friendship. Hardy then gasped and excitedly said hello to Benjamin Franklin. Omega looked on at Hangman with shock and laughed. Hardy was very excited to find his old friend and said he was there when he was flying the kite and he thought he was mad, but it turns out Benjamin also had broken brilliance. Page awkward stared at Hardy then slowly backed away and said he’s going to go take a bath and left. Omega and the Bucks were trying to reassure Hardy regarding Page’s unusual behavior saying it was a lot of new information to take in at once. Hardy said you’ll never know who you’re going to be reunited with space and time. Hardy then started telling more stories about Abraham Lincoln.
FINAL THOUGHTS:
Originally this episode was called “Man That Hangs” when it was first published. I receive post notifications when an episode is released so I can start reviewing it as soon as possible and as I sat down to cover the episode the name had been changed to “Gig.” I’m not sure if anything or anyone prompted the change, or the idea of calling an episode that just didn’t feel right since it kind of implies killing someone. I first started reviewing this episode two hours after it was published so at some point in those first two hours of being up they changed the name. While it’s not anything egregious, they made the right decision. Avoid controversy anywhere you can and an episode doesn’t need to be called “Man that Hangs” even though I understand the thought behind calling it that in context to the show.
The weird TH2 promos have invaded BTE and it felt very out of place. This may be due to the lack of Road To episodes to feature them on, but I’m not sure of that. I gave up trying to transcribe Jack Evans’ rambling ridiculousness. It’s so preposterous. I continue to absolutely hate it and I don’t think they can change my mind. I don’t get why he talks like this, it’s awful. I don’t know who this is directed at, but I hope that target audience is enjoying it. TH2 are exceptionally talented in the ring and I think Angelico does okay on the promos, but I can’t understand the Jack Evan’s shtick and I don’t know if I want to.
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