SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
It is time for the Most Unique Money in the Bank. Despite that eyesore of a line, for better or worse, this will undoubtedly be a memorable show. The match itself will take place at Titan Towers, WWE’s corporate headquarters in Stanford Connecticut. Both men and women’s matches will occur simultaneously with competitors having to fight their way up to the roof where they need to climb a ladder and retrieve a briefcase with a contract for an immediate title shot that can be cashed in at any time and place of their choosing. Joining the eponymous match are (as of the time of writing) four title matches, the men’s WWE Universal Championship, WWE Championship, WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championship, and WWE Smackdown Women’s Championship, all being defended.
Bonus prediction/hope/fantasy booking: Failing to toss an opponent off of the roof, King Corbin goes over the edge but manages to cling on to the ledge for dear life. As he slowly loses his grip, fingers slipping, on by one, a hand reaches out and stops him from falling. A relieved Corbin looks up at his would-be savior only to be greeted by the visage of Elias who says something pithy (preferably from the movie Die Hard), and lets Corbin fall to his doom. Fortunately, a truck transporting a vat of dog food is there to break his fall. Afterwards a drone shot captures the winners of the match standing on a ladder triumphantly holding their briefcases as fireworks explode in the night sky behind them.
Daniel Bryan vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Aleister Black vs. King Corbin vs. Otis vs. A.J. Styles – Men’s Money in the Bank ladder match
Story in a nutshell: Six men compete in a ladder for the Money in the Bank contract which guarantees them a shot at their brand’s champion at a time of their choice.
The biggest storylines here involve Aleister Black taking issue with AJ Styles, possibly igniting a feud between the two that will last beyond Money in the Bank, and Rey Mysterio stating he is fully prepared to die to win the contract.
Prediction: This one is hard to predict since I think the winner will hold the briefcase for a while. I’m eliminating Bryan and Rey since they seem to be in a different place in their careers, and Otis due to his current storyline with Ziggler, Sonya, and Mandy. I can’t discount Vince’s Corbin fetish and I can see him hold it until Roman Reigns returns to win the championship from the Fiend and is promptly defeated by Corbin. I pray this won’t be the case and since Corbin ended up holding the briefcase at the go-home show, it will most likely not be happening. This leaves AJ and Black, and I think AJ walking around gloating with the briefcase works. So, I’ve got AJ winning.
Asuka vs. Shayna Baszler vs. Nia Jax vs. Dana Brooke vs. Lacey Evans vs. Carmella – Women’s Money in the Bank ladder match
Story in a nutshell: Six women compete in a ladder for the Money in the Bank contract which guarantees them a shot at their brand’s champion at a time of their choice.
Beyond all these women wanting to win to get a championship contract, over on Smackdown Lacey Evan wants to get her hands on Bayley, who along with Sasha Banks, have been tormenting her for months now. A win can expedite that for Lacey. Meanwhile on Raw, Nia Jax has made an impact with her return, aggressively going after the women’s division and coming face to face with Asuka and Bayzler on the build to Money in the Bank.
Prediction: While my first inclination is to say “Duh, of course it’ll be Shayna in dominating fashion”, by pausing for a moment’s thought, I like the idea of her NOT winning. Since it’s a match with multiple bodies she can’t control, a loss can further fuel a rage she can take out on the rest of the roster as she seeks a way to get at Becky Lynch.
So first, I’m eliminating Dana Brooke (I’m sorry, I like you and am pulling for your success but the only way you win is if WWE is trolling us), Lacey Evans (outside chance since it can come into play in the Sasha/Bayley angle), and Carmella. That leaves Asuka and Nia Jax. Asuka seems to be in a different kind of role right now so, I’m going with Nia Jax. This would be a good way to get a Nia Jax/Becky Lynch program going for a while, while Shayna is being built back up for her eventual confrontation with Lynch.
Drew McIntyre vs. Seth Rollins – Men’s WWE Championship Match
Story in a nutshell: Drew McIntyre defends his championship against the increasingly unhinged Seth Rollins who seeks the belt so he can chart WWE’s future going forward.
The Monday night after Wrestlemania, Drew McIntyre was attacked by Seth Rollins and was on the receiving end of The Stomp. Drew followed up by challenging Seth to a match since he knew he’d eventually have to face him since Seth is one of the best wrestlers, and that as champion, Drew needed to face the best. During their ceremonial contract signing, Drew called out Seth for being full of crap as Seth continues to adopt a messianic demeanor. Unexpectedly, the signing erupted into chaos, Murphy made his return to Seth’s side eventually taking a Claymore in Seth’s stead.
Prediction: I can not believe that the WWE would take the crown off of Drew so soon even if its just so he can chase Seth. I think this end in some sort of screwy finish like a disqualification, count out, or something of the like, leaving Drew to retain and continuing the storyline.
Braun Strowman vs. Bray Wyatt – Men’s WWE Universal Championship
Story in a nutshell: As he continues his quest to right past perceived wrongs against him, Bray turns his sights onto his former follower in the Wyatt Family, the current Universal Champion, Braun Strowman.
After defeating John Cena, who he credits with creating The Fiend, Bray challenges his former (disciple, follower, protégée?) Braun Strowman for the Universal Championship, on the conceit that Braun was created by Bray Wyatt. Braun disputes this, of course, confident that he can see through Bray’s mind games, but Bray continues his attempts to get inside Braun’s head by leaving him the mask Braun wore during his time as a member of the Wyatt Family as a memento.
Prediction: As it is Bray challenging Braun Strowman, I fully expect Braun to win, probably decisively so, only to be attacked by The Fiend so this feud can continue. I do expect some light hocus-pocus in this match like The Fiend and Bray being in the same place at the same time or swapping places supernaturally fast.
Bayley vs. Tamina – WWE Smackdown Women’s Championship match
Story in a nutshell: After getting past Sasha Banks, Tamina earned a shot at Bayley’s championship.
It took four women working in concert to take Tamina out of the women’s elimination five-way match at Wrestlemania, and when Tamina confronted Bayley with that fact, Bayley promptly put her friend, Sasha Banks in Tamina’s way. Tamina beat her and thus earned her shot, one on one, for the women’s title.
Prediction: Bayley is going to win. This is Bayley and Sasha’s storyline and Tamina is little more than a cameo. The only real question here is if something will happen that will further drive a wedge into the Bayley/Sasha relationship.
The New Day vs. The Miz and John Morrison vs. The Forgotten Sons vs. Lucha House Party, Fatal 4-Way WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championship match
Story in a nutshell: No clear number one contender for your tag team championship? Throw them all in then!
While celebrating winning the tag championships, New Day were interrupted by Lucha House Party, who were tired of not getting any championship shots and stating they want one (despite getting squashed by the Forgotten Sons two weeks prior). Miz and Morrison interrupted, complaining they lost the titles in a singles match, not a tag match. The Forgotten Sons entered stating they plan to dominate the division. To prove it, the Forgotten Sons defeated the New Day in a non-title match the following week.
Prediction: New Day retains. When there is a multi-side match for a championship, unless there is a compelling issue to change the titles, like injury or the like, the titles tend to stay on the incumbent champs. Forgotten Sons are not established in the main roster, and the Lucha House Party is the Lucha House Party. Miz and Morrison are the only longshots, and a victory by the would only happen if the intention is to pad the New Day’s number of championship wins.
Man, when you lay this card out there’s absolutely nothing that really jumps off the page, aside from maybe the spectacle of the actual MITB match. I like McIntyre, but Seth is ‘meh’ as a challenger.