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The following was originally published on PWTorch.com 15 years ago this week…
WWE Smackdown review
July 3, 2003
Taped July 1 in Rochester, N.Y.
Aired on UPN
[HOUR ONE]
The opening video airs, recapping the encounter between Zach and Vince last week. Dramatic music plays in the background as Vince asks Zach to accept his apology. Zach calls Vince a ” Son of a bitch.” Zach politely declines Vince’s offer to join his kiss my ass club by low blowing him. Vince announces that on Smackdown, Zach and Steph will team to face the Big Show for Zach’s contract.
We go to the camera on Vince’s face. Vince proclaims that, “Tonight, once and for all, I will personally seal Mr. America’s fate.” Vince also discusses the fact that this match will truly be the first ever “handicapped match.”
1st Quarter Hour
Rey Mysterio makes his way down to the ring to defend the Cruiserweight Championship. Kidman is shown in the crowd. Nunzio and the FBI make their way to the ring.
(1) Rey Mysterio defeated Nunzio for the Cruiserweight championship by pinfall (Tazz called the finishing move Dropping the Dime, which is a springboard leg drop from the top rope). The ref throws out the other FBI members and the match begins with a nice take down by Nunzio. Tazz and Cole, oblivious to the match, discuss Vince’s promise to get rid of Mr. America. Mysterio takes advantage with a huracanrana, which sends Nunzio out of the ring and follows up with a rolling senton over the top rope. There has been great action so far in this match between these two. Back in the ring, Nunzio reverses the West Coast Pop from the top rope into a powerbomb. Nunzio scores several near falls and then stretches Mysterio’s arms behind his back. Nunzio hits a spinning sidewalk slam on Rey Rey and uses another rest hold, this time it’s a headlock. Cole reminds those with ADD that the FBI has been sent back to the locker room. Both men are down and Chioda counts them out, but they are able to get up. Mysterio hits a flapjack on Nunzio. Mysterio then hits the West Coast pop and a standing moonsault, but Nunzio kicks out. Nunzio hits an elbow from the second rope. Both men topple over the top rope, but Mysterio takes the advantage and sends Nunzio back into the ring. Stamboli and Palumbo come out and attack Mysterio. Nunzio covers Rey Rey, but he kicks out. The APA comes out to get rid of Stamboli and Palumbo. Mysterio takes advantage, hitting the 619 and Dropping the Dime for the three count.
Kidman comes into the ring and raises Mysterio’s hand.
Cole announces that Benjamin and Haas will face Tajiri and Eddie later tonight for the tag belts.
(Commercial Break)
2nd Quarter Hour
We return from the commercial break and Cole hypes Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle in the main event for Vengeance. Its about time that the WWE begins to put together the card for Vengeance.
Backstage, Kurt and Brock argue about which one of them the women who walked by was talking to. They compare how many times each has held the WWE title. Brock says that she was talking to the man who beat Kurt at Wrestlemania. Kurt insists that she was talking to the man who is going to beat Brock Lesnar at Vengeance. Brock takes a huge swig of milk. Kurt tells the woman that he’s the champ, but Brock comes up from behind and pushes Kurt, forcing him to spit milk on the young lady.
The Basham Brothers (w/Shaniqua) are in the ring. Rhyno makes his entrance, followed by Benoit.
(2) Chris Benoit & Rhyno defeated The Basham Brothers when Danny Basham tapped out to the Crossface. Rhyno hits several chops on Doug Basham and takes the advantage, but Doug tags out to his brother. Rhyno hits a clothesline, but Danny takes advantage with an enzuigiri. Doug Basham delivers an elbow from the second rope and gets a two count on Rhyno. Danny Basham is tagged in and covers Rhyno for a two count. Cole ignores the action in the ring and discusses Big Show’s match, which will take place later tonight. Rhyno ducks a clothesline and tags in Benoit. Benoit hits several suplexes on Danny, but Doug helps interferes. Eventually, all four men brawl in the ring. Benoit eventually takes over and hits a release German suplex. Benoit connects with the flying headbutt off the top rope on Danny Basham. Doug Basham comes in the ring and breaks up the three count. Rhyno is back in the ring, but Danny trips him up and nails Benoit with a punch as well. The Basham’s were going to double team Benoit, but Rhyno speared Doug as he came off the ropes, allowing Benoit to lock in the crossface on Danny, who tapped out.
Shaniqua bats her eyes at Benoit, but he declines her (not so) tempting offer and leaves up the ramp.
Vince and Steph are backstage. Vince tells Stephanie that she put him in harms way last week, so why shouldn’t he put her in a match. Stephanie complains about being a woman, “Brock Lesnar can’t even defeat the Big Show.” Vince wishes her good luck in her match tonight and leaves the room.
(Commercial Break)
3rd Quarter Hour
Another Vengeance ad airs. Cole and Tazz hype the main event of Lesnar vs. Angle.
Steph and Sablelicious are backstage. Sable tells Steph that she could get hurt tonight. Sable says that she will be watching Steph tonight. Sable says that if anything unfortunate should happen to Steph, she would be able to satisfy Vince as the GM of Smackdown.
Earlier Today! Jamie Noble and Nidia step out of a limo. Noble talks about deserving the finer things in life. He imitates The Terminator, putting on sunglasses and saying, ” I’ll be back.” Noble then smacks Nidia on the behind. Nidia puts on a fur coat; she tells Noble that it is a real life, fake fur coat. They make out as only they can and then Jamie gives the driver a tip, but in a hilarious moment comes back into the picture and takes the money back. These two are funny together, but I would like to see Noble in the ring, rather than in vignettes week after week.
Orlando Johnson and Taker are backstage. Taker gives him some advice, telling Johnson that going to the ring and getting his ass kicked each and every week will help him gain respect from the boys in the back and the fans. Taker says that getting beat down after the match doesn’t fly. He tells Johnson that if that happens, he won’t get any respect. Taker tells Johnson to challenge Cena in order to get respect in the WWE. Cena comes into the picture and tells Johnson not to let Taker brainwash Johnson into another beat down. Cena tells the Taker to stay out of his business.
Ass man and Torrie make their way to the ring. Gunn looks really stupid in this gimmick. I don’t know how he will ever get over looking like a fairy. Torrie looks really good tonight, but she is no Sablelicious.
Cole says that it will be Gunn vs. Cena, next!
(Commercial Break)
Back from the commercial break, John Cena makes his entrance. Cena raps the ring not being a yard, but a prison with him as the warden. He brings up the fact that Gunn must like sausage and nuts. This was a good promo by Cena, who also brought up the Ass man’s partnership with Palumbo. I suggested that Cena not use cheap methods of getting heat and this was an example of the type of promo that will make Cena a main event player in the future.
(3) U.S. Title Tournament: Billy Gunn pinned John Cena with a roll up. Gunn opens up on Cena, who bails out of the ring. Gunn follows him out there, but Cena reverses an Irish-whip, sending Gunn into the ring post. Cena kicks him in the face, which sounded stiff. Cena cinches in a headlock on the Ass Man. There are still no brackets for the US title tournament, but Cole tells us who has advanced. It was mentioned so quickly that I only caught Benoit as advancing. Ah yes, I remember now that Matt Hardy advanced as well. Cena hits Gunn with several right hands and then kicks him over. Cena covers Gunn, who kicks out at two. Cena hits a sidewalk slam on Gunn for a two count. Cole discusses the history of the US Title, which is somewhat of an improvement over the past few weeks, where no background information on the title has been given. Cole mentions Harley Race and Ricky Steamboat as being past US Titleholders. Gunn slams Cena to the mat and both men are down. Gunn hits a clothesline on Cena and then a neck breaker, but Cena kicks out. Cena escapes a splash and hits the throwback on Gunn. Cena goes for the chain and Takers music hits.
4th Quarter Hour
Taker rides down to the ring and Gunn roles up the distracted John Cena from behind. Gunn advances in the US Title Tournament. Taker looks on seemingly satisfied that he has gotten his respect from Cena.
Kurt and Brock are backstage, discussing their incident with the young lady earlier. They both talk about how they are competitive people. Kurt challenges Brock to a push-up contest. They go back and forth, trading insults. Brock says they should go up to three hundred pushups. Kurt miscounts and Brock gets frustrated.
These two have good chemistry with one another, but it is a shame that Angle isn’t playing the heel in this match. The friendly competition aspect of this feud could be interesting; I’m not sure what to make of it yet.
(Commercial Break)
We come back from the break and Brock is still doing pushups. Angle is urging him on as Brock goes three hundred. Brock barely makes it to three hundred, but insists on doing more pushups. He quits at 301. Brock says that Angle has to do the pushups now, but Angle declines. Funny vignette, with Kurt declining to do the pushups.
Benjamin and Haas make their way out to the ring. They are now being called The Best Tag Team Ever. They are followed by the tag champs, Guerrero and Tajiri, who come out in the low rider.
(4) Eddie Guerrero and Tajiri were defeated by The Best Tag Team Ever for the Tag Team Championship when Haas pinned Guerrero. Tajiri and Haas begin the match, Tajiri takes the advantage, nailing Haas with a loud-sounding kick and then applies a headlock. Tajiri takes Haas down with a drop toehold and tags Guerrero into the match. Haas takes the advantage and tags in Benjamin.
[HOUR TWO]
Fifth Quarter Hour
Guerrero applies an arm lock on Benjamin and turns it into a leg scissors take down off the top rope. That was a great looking move by Guerrero. Benjamin and Haas are able to take the advantage by double teaming Guerrero. Haas hammers away at Guerrero’s head, but Eddie is able to gain the advantage and nail Haas with a belly to belly suplex. Eddie tags in Tajiri, who takes advantage with several kicks and hits a reverse bulldog on Haas. Benjamin hits a clothesline off a springboard on Tajiri when the ref had his back turned. Guerrero came in to break up the pin attempt. The Best Tag Team Ever is in control, but will they be when we come back?
(Commercial Break) This totally ruins the momentum of a good match so far. Great effort from both teams.
We are back from the break and Tajiri is still in trouble. Benjamin puts Tajiri in an abdominal stretch. Eddie takes the tag rope off so that he can move back and forth on the apron to get the tag from Tajiri. Benjamin hammers away at Tajiri, who has been isolated for a long time. Benjamin drags Tajiri into the corner and tags in Haas, who whips Tajiri into the ropes. Guerrero jumps in to break up a pinfall attempt and the ref kicks him out of the ring. Benjamin and Haas hit a double team move on Tajiri, with Benjamin leaping over Haas and landing on Tajiri’s lower back. Tajiri is eventually able to tag in Guerrero, who hits several dropkicks and then goes for a series of suplexes on Benjamin, but Haas interferes. Eddie takes the advantage and delivers multiple suplexes on Haas. Guerrero goes to the top rope but Benjamin stops him and hits a superplex. Tajiri is back in the ring and hits his handspring elbow on Benjamin. Benjamin and Tajiri fight outside of the ring, leaving Haas and Guerrero are alone in the ring. Haas attempts to pin Guerrero, but he gets his shoulder up. Guerrero hits a backbreaker, but Benjamin comes back into the ring and tosses Eddie over the top rope. Haas and Benjamin attempt to double-team Tajiri, but he delivers a great looking kick to Benjamin’s head and then locks Haas in The Tarantula. In a great visual, Guerrero goes for the frogsplash on Benjamin, while Haas is locked in The Tarantula, be he misses. Tajiri is superkicked into the low rider and the ref checks on him. Eddie was distracted as he looked at Tajiri lying on the hood of the low rider. This allowed Benjamin and Haas to double-team Guerrero as Benjamin kicks Guerrero in the stomach. Haas then rolled him up for the pinfall. Great match, with new tag team champs crowned!
Zach Gowen is shown warming up. Show walks up to Zach and steps on him. He reminds Zach that he only has one leg to stand on and walks away. The Showster is really improving.
(Commercial Break) No Ultimo Dragon this week? Unpossible!
6th Quarter Hour
Back from break we are shown highlights of the previous match, which resulted in new tag team champions being crowned.
Eddie is still in the ring. Cole says he is worried about Tajiri’s welfare, but that is not the case, as it seems Eddie is very upset about his low-rider.
The amazing career of Mr. America is recapped in another well-done video package.
We go back to a shot of Eddie Guerrero, who is still upset about his car. Tajiri is lying behind him, on the outside of the ring. Eddie begins to kick Tajiri. He slams him onto the hood of the car. Eddie lifts Tajiri up and throws him through the windshield. I won’t be messing with his low rider anytime soon.
The crowd chants, “Eddie, Eddie.” This is not good, as it seemed that he is supposed to be turning heel.
It was strange how they bounced back and forth to the Eddie Guerrero/ Tajiri situation. It was a segment of the show that did not have a lot of continuity to it.
(Commercial Break)
We come back (again) to Tajiri, who is being taken out of the arena on a stretcher. The replay of Guerrero throwing Tajiri through the windshield is shown.
Orlando Jordan mysteriously appears in the ring to face Albert, who gets his own ring entrance.
(5) A-Train pinned Orlando Jordan. Albert hits a nasty looking shoulder block on Orlando Jordan. A-Train hits a splash, but Jordan is able to kick out. Cole explains that The Rock’s father trained Jordan. At least we get some background on this newcomer. A-Train whips Jordan from corner to corner. He then locks Jordan in an inverted full nelson, who eventually reverses it into a pinfall attempt, but A-Train goes for the bicycle kick and misses. Jordan hits an enzuigiri, and then hits a flying forearm on A-Train. A-Train takes the advantage and hits the Baldo bomb, but Jordan kicks out?! A-Train runs into a drop-toehold and Jordan heads up to the top rope, but A-Train swats him into the mat. A-Train hits the Trainwreck for the one, two, three. I guess Taker was right about Johnson getting his ass kicked week after week.
Seventh Quarter Hour
Steph encounters the Showster backstage. He asks her where her one legged protector is as he sniffs her hair. He says there are so many ways he would like to hurt her. (Maybe by taking away her fries?) Steph runs away and the camera pans to Vince, who reminds Show that it is his daughter who he will be facing tonight. He also says that Show will be interested in his upcoming announcement.
The Vengeance promo with Kurt Angle airs.
(Commercial Break)
Wrestlemania Recall: Jake the Snake w/ Alice Cooper vs. Elvis. Cool moment with the Mouth of the South being bitten by Damien the Snake. I’m going to go all out to get some Wrestlemania tickets. This one is going to be huge.
No Chance! Vince struts to the ring with the hot Sablelicious on his harm. She is worth at least four tissues tonight. Vince looks funny in his patterned shirt, must have forgotten the suit. Vince has a mic and he asks the crowd if they like his daughter’s assistant, they do. Vince says he is going to seal the fate of Mr. America tonight. He says that he sent Hogan home to rot. He says most people would take a check and stay home, but not Hogan. Vince says that Hogan had to create this Mr. America crap. Vince says he has proof that Mr. America is Hogan and that their contracts are null and void. Vince said he knew Mr. America would do something special for the audience at MSG. He says that he told the cameramen to keep their cameras rolling.
Roll the footage!
The video airs showing Mr. America to be Hogan.
Vince thanks the cameramen. He tells the crowd to chant for Hogan and Mr. America all they want because they are going stay at home. He says that Mr. America and Hogan will be in the same place at the same time, the unemployment line. Vince, as only he can say, tells Mr. America/ Hogan ” You’re fired!”
Vince moves on to other business. He says that Zach could have had his contract by joining the kiss my ass club. Vince says that all the ass kissers in the crowd wouldn’t mind joining the club. Vince says that Zach doesn’t want to do things the easy way. The crowd chants “asshole.” Vince says that Zach just might be an asshole, funny. Vince makes the match a no holds barred match. He also discusses the main event at Vengeance. Vince makes the match a triple threat match, by adding the Showster.
Eight Quarter Hour
Vince invites Sable to sit next to him so that they can enjoy the handicap match together at ringside.
Vince was pretty good in this segment, but not as good as last week. He could have done better with the Hogan/ Mr. America explanation, but the WWE did a good job considering that Hogan left without much notice.
(Commercial Break) This is going to be a short main-event.
Extreme Blast of the Night: Zach and Vince’s encounter from last week. Vince invites Zach to kiss his ass, but Zach punches him in the junk.
Well it’s The Big Show! Vince applauds as the improved Giant comes to the ring. Show has come a long way in a year. He really has improved his acting ability and is becoming a good heel.
Steph makes her way out, looking rather timid. The show looks like he wants to eat her. I love the expressions on Show’s face. Vince moves his head to Steph’s music as she walks to the ring, funny stuff.
Zach makes his way out to some descent entrance music.
(6) Zach Gowen & Steph defeated The Big Show in a no DQ match when Zach pinned The Big Show. Zach and Show begin the match in the ring, but the action quickly spills to the outside. Steph jumps on Show’s back and shrieks like someone took her cheeseburger. Show slams her into the mat. Show has Zach’s leg, which is a pretty funny visual. Zach, on one leg hits Show with a drop kick to the outside. Zach tries to nail Show with a splash over the top rope, but Show catches him and throws him into the ring. Zach looks really good in the ring. The WWE should have saved this for PPV. Show sees Steph lying on the outside. He decides to be nice and assist her by throwing her back into the ring. Sablicious and Vince look on approvingly. Show picks up Steph and Vince steps into the ring faking compassion for daddy’s little girl, but then he tells Show to throw her over the rope. Zach punches Show to save Stephanie, but Show knocks him down. Show picks up Zach and Chokeslams him as Vince cheers him on. Vince puts the boots to Gowen, but Steph comes in and slaps Vince. Vince backs up Steph into Show. Show grabs Steph and is about to chokeslam her, but Angle interferes and puts Show in the anklelock. Vince hits angle with a chair.
Here comes the pain! Lesnar comes out and attempts an F-5 on Vince, but Show kicks him off. Show has a steel chair, but Zach dropkicks the steel chair into his head. Kurt Angle gives Show an Angle slam and Brock Lesnar follows that up with an F-5. Zach comes in and dropkicks Vince out of the ring. He then goes to the top rope and hits a one legged moonsault on Show. Zach is very talented and showed great fire in the ring.
Cole says that Zach is now a WWE superstar. Great facial expressions from Vince, who looks on in disgust. Cole says that Gowen has fulfilled his American Dream as the screen goes to black.
Radican’s reaction: I decided that I could do better than the WWE and create my own U.S. Title Tournament Bracket so here goes:
U.S. Title Tournament
Benoit
>Benoit
Rhyno
Matt Hardy
>Matt Hardy
Rikishi
John Cena
>Billy Gunn
Billy Gunn
Hope that helps everyone out… I thought that Smackdown featured several good matches, highlighted by the excellent tag title match. Both teams put in a great effort, with Tajiri taking two PPV quality bumps… It seems to me that Smackdown is giving away a little much on TV lately with the tag titles switching hands and Zach Gowen making his in-ring debut on Smackdown. I think these two parts of the show should have been saved for Vengeance… One thing that I noticed is that Cole and Tazz really oversold the main event and ignored the action in the ring too often. They briefly mentioned that one of the Basham brothers was more dominant than the other in bed, but this didn’t really tell us anything more than one small fact about this new team. Cole and Tazz also mentioned that The Rock’s father trained Orlando Johnson, but we didn’t really learn anything else about Orlando Johnson. I also do not see what good it does Orlando Johnson to go out to the ring and get squashed every week… John Cena delivered a solid promo on the way to the ring this week, but I don’t agree with him losing to Billy Gunn. John Cena could have used a US Title reign as a stepping stone to the WWE title. This loss really hurts any momentum he gained… The Big Show has really come a long way, from his in ring work to his facial expressions, The Big Show is going through the best run of his career. . I really liked this show, but I am left to wonder what the WWE is going to feature in the Vengeance PPV. It seems like they have given away some good things on television that they should have saved for the PPV… I wish everyone a happy Fourth of July and I encourage you to pick up a copy of the new HBK DVD, which is really good.
NOW CHECK OUT THE PREVIOUS 2003 FLASHBACK: 15 YRS AGO – WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT (6-26-03): Radican’s debut for PWTorch including Vince McMahon, Hulk Hogan as Mr. America, Angle & Lesnar, Undertaker & APA team, Cena vs. Orlando Jordan, Piper
Billy Gunn the fairy, four tissue sable and orlando johnson. This has not aged well.