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WWE Smackdown review
June 26, 2003
Aired on UPN
Taped June 24, 2003 in New York, N.Y. at MSG
Report by Sean Radican, PWTorch contributor
The opening video airs, recapping the Vince and Zach confrontation last week. We see Vince beat Zach in an arm wrestling match. Sable seduces poor innocent Zach while cheesy porno music backs their interaction in Steph’s office. Sable tells Zach that he could never have her and Vince kicks him out of the office. Steph walks in on Vince and Sablelicious. Steph then goes on a disturbing rant about giving favors to Vince’s business associates and innocence lost. She claims Zach is her last hope to reclaim her innocence lost.
The new opening montage airs!
1st Quarter Hour
Cole and Tazz welcomed viewers from ringside.
(1) John Cena beat Orlando Jordan. Word Life! John Cena comes out claiming to be bigger than MSG. He’s sporting a Larry Bird Jersey. Cena says he will be in the main-event at Wrestlemania 20. The MSG fans greet him with a “you suck” chant. Cena issues an open challenge to any rookie in the back. Cole reminds us that a year ago Chris Jericho offered Cena a similar opportunity. Billy Kidman is shown in the front row with some ladies. Haven’t seen him in awhile. I saw Cena wearing a Clemens jersey at Backlash and now he is saying that NYC sucks. This is a really bad way to draw heel heat. I think that people will eventually catch on to the fact that Cena insults every city he is in. He needs to find a new way to heat. Jones opens up quickly on Cena, hitting an enzuigiri. Cena hits a spine-buster on Jones and follows with an F-U, but Jones reverses it. Cole says Cena is in trouble. Cena rolls through a top rope splash for the pin, while holding Jones’ tights.
Undertaker’s music hits after Cena gives Jones an F-U. Taker enters the ring and Cena runs back up the entrance ramp. Tazz wonders why the Taker has blessed us with his presence. Taker gives Jones a little pat on the side as a show of respect and then poses for the crowd.
Good opening match. Jones looked solid in the ring, but the match went too short to see what kind of ability he has.
(Commercial Break)
2nd Quarter Hour
We return from the commercial break and Cole hypes the main event. Out comes the APA. Bradshaw has joined the cut-my-hair club. The F.B.I makes their entrance. The music Sounds like “No Sleep Till Brooklyn.” Didn’t Ron Simmons retire?
(2) Undertaker & The A.P.A beat The F.B.I (Johnny Stamboli & Chuck Palumbo & Nunzio). The match opens up with Taker putting Palumbo in a headlock. Taker gives Palumbo an arm bar as Cole hypes his mixed-martial arts background. Taker hits the old school off the top rope. Nunzio interferes and Palumbo takes control. Stamboli tags in and works over the Taker with punches. Ron Simmons is tagged in and gives Stamboli a spine buster. Palumbo interferes and the FBI hammer Simmons in their corner. The FBI continually isolates Simmons in their corner as the ref keeps Bradshaw and Taker at bay. Palumbo holds Simmons in what Tazz calls a “hump clutch”, not a camel clutch. Simmons knees Palumbo in the groin and tags in Bradshaw, who according to Tazz, has never looked better. Bradshaw dominates, hitting a fall away slam on Stamboli, but takes a kick from Palumbo. The Taker hits a choke slam on Palumbo, but Stamboli takes him over the top rope. Bradshaw eventually hits the clothesline-from-hell on Stamboli to take the win.
I really like the way the F.B.I uses the old school heel tactics of keeping the ref distracted while working over their opponent. The F.B.I did a good job of making this repetitive feud entertaining.
Cole hails the arrival of the Ultimo Dragon later tonight. A great highlight package airs, hyping his debut at MSG on Smackdown, tonight!
(Commercial Break)
3rd Quarter Hour
Jamie Noble and Nidia are outside signing autographs. A couple of fans approach them and ask for an autograph. Noble and Nidia get angry when the fans ask for directions to the subway. A man approaches Noble and Nidia and informs them that an Aunt Lucille died, leaving them a large amount of money. Great stuff here. Noble and Nidia embrace and then in a great moment Nidia goes to give the man a blow-job, but Noble pulls her away so Nidia pulls away and French kisses the man. Noble promises to take her to Applebee’s for dinner, hilarious stuff from these two.
Cole and Tazz hype MSG as the Home of Wrestlemania 20. The Wrestlemania Recall is aired. This is great on so many levels. These recaps bring back incredible memories of past WrestleMania’s. We get highlights from Wrestlemania 1 at MSG.
Sable is shown backstage in Steph’s office. Vince enters and Sable apologizes for Steph walking in on them. Sable says she finds Vinnie Mack very attractive and his hair drives her crazy. Sable wants to feel Vince’s hands in her hair. She runs her hands through his hair, but Vince says, not tonight. He has something he has to do. I wonder what, because I wouldn’t mind running my hands through her hair.
(Commercial Break) I never got the whole fascination with Mr. Bean. Johnny English looks absolutely stupid.
WWE Rewind: Terminator 3 looks awesome. Highlights air of Benoit and Rhyno’s US Title Tournament match from last week. Rhyno taps to the cross-face and Benoit advances in the US Title Tournament.
Matt Hardy makes his entrance. Matt Facts: Matt has better abs than Rikishi. Hilarious. Matt is the cover of WWE magazine. Rikishi makes his 11,000 straight appearance on Smackdown. He has cut his shirt to make him look like a young girl at the beach.
(3) U.S. Title Tournament: Matt Hardy pinned Rikishi via the twist of fate. Rikishi opens with DDT on Hardy. Rikishi Splashes Hardy in the Corner, but Matt slides out of the ring and avoids the stink-face. Matt drives Rikishi into the ring post and throws him back into the ring for a two count. The shirt Rikishi wears is disgusting. It is cut at the midriff and looks like something that you wouldn’t mind seeing an attractive blond in on a hot day. Rikishi gains control and gives hardy a belly to belly suplex. Tazz and Cole discuss the tradition of the US Title. Rikishi hits the Rikishi-Driver, but Hardy kicks out. The announcers really shouldn’t say that will be it, because every time they say that, the person being Pinned is able to kick out. Kish sets Hardy up for the bonzai drop but takes the knees to the chest. Hardy hits the twist of fate, but the Kish kicks out. Hardy takes the turnbuckle off the rope. Rikishi hits Hardy with a kick to the face and tries to splash him into the corner, but runs into the exposed turnbuckle. Hardy takes advantage, catching him with the twist of fate, which leads to the pinfall.
Cole informs us that the Tag Titles are on the line, next!
(Commercial Break)
4th Quarter Hour
Extreme Blast of the Night: Stephanie whining to Vince last week about innocence lost.
Josh Matthews interviews Billy Kidman. Billy says it’s not so good to be back. Billy says that it has been hard to sit at home and watch people like Rey Mysterio become the Cruiserweight champion, when it should be him.
The Bagpipes hit and out come Piper and O’Haire, followed by Tajiri and Guerrero
(4) WWE Tag Team Championship: Tajiri & Eddie Guerrero (Champions) defeated Rowdy Roddy Piper & Sean O’Haire when Guerrero pinned O’Haire via the frog splash. Guerrero and O’Haire open up with Guerrero hitting an elbow and a senton over the top rope onto O’Haire. Tajiri tags in and hits his handspring elbow, but O’Haire does not go down. A kick from Tajiri finally knocks the larger O’Haire down. Tajiri locks in the tarantula, but Piper kicks him off. O’Haire takes control, showing good strength by slamming Tajiri halfway across the ring. The audio sweetener jeers Piper as he enters the ring. Piper slides out of the ring and O’Haire comes back in without a tag. Rest time as O’Haire grabs a rear naked choke on Tajiri. O’Haire reverses a power slam into a reverse bulldog. Cool looking move. Piper comes in and Guerrero unloads on him. O’Haire comes in and takes control, but Guerrero counters with a dropkick. Tajiri hits Piper with the mist and sling shots his neck off the tope rope. Eddie hits the frog splash and gets the three count.
A recap airs of Brock vs. Show from last week, setting up the six man tag main event
Cole asks Tazz if Show can choke slam Mr. America again tonight.
5th Quarter Hour
Vince’s music hits and out walks the chairman, not looking as arrogant as usual. Vince invites Steph and Zach out to the ring. Steph looks really big. Maybe the seventh boob job was a bad idea. Vince thanks them for coming out. Vince tells Steph that she has always been the apple of his eye and daddy’s little girl, how sweet. He tells the crowd to shut up because he is having a conversation with his daughter. Vince says that she matured very quickly and that he asked Steph to close business deals for him when she was 17. He didn’t realize what he had done until last week. Vince tells her that he stole her innocence. This is sick. Vince tells her that it’s like he personally deflowered Steph. It doesn’t get more tasteless than this. Vince says he will never forgive himself for what he did. Steph makes a bad angry face. Vince tells Zach that he wants to be Zach Gowen. Vince tells Zach that he wants to be him because Zach looked death in the eye and spit in its face. Vince says they will understand each other better now. Vinnie Mac wants to wipe the slate clean. Vince asks Zach to accept his apology. Zach does not want to accept Vince’s apology, but Vince demands that Zach accept. Zach says no again. Zach tells Vince that he doesn’t intimidate him. In a great moment, Zach tells Vince, “You don’t intimidate me you son- of- a- bitch. Zach tells Vince that he won’t make a joke out of him. The crowd cheers. Good segment. Zach tells Vince that the one thing he can offer him is a WWE contract
Vince says he can have a contract, but only under one condition. Vince says Zach can join a special club here at MSG. I could see this one coming. Vince says Zach can join the kiss my ass club. Vince pulls down his pants and tells Zach to pucker up. Vince tells Stephanie to tell Zach that if he kisses his ass he has a contract. “On your knees”, Vince orders. Zach gets on his knees and low blows Vince. Zach throws his cane at Vince and walks up the isle.
Zach showed good fire in this segment.
Cole and Tazz say that Zach would not be intimidated tonight.
(Commercial Break)
6th Quarter Hour
Cole and Tazz re-cap the previous segment.
Rey Mysterio Jr. comes out for the Ultimo Dragon’s debut.
Ultimo Dragon has the best entrance in the WWE. There is fire spread behind him going in all direction when he gets to the middle of the entrance ramp. This is a way to make an impression on people who have not seen the Ultimo Dragon before. It makes him seem important. Cole hypes him as an international Superstar.
(Commercial Break)
Vengeance Promo featuring Kurt airs
(5) Ultimo Dragon pinned Shannon Moore. Dragon rolls through and kicks Moore out of an arm bar. Great athletic exchange as the Dragon hits an elbow on Moore. Moore trips the Dragon neck first into the rope. Moore locks in a submission hold on the Dragon. Dragon gets out and hits a spinning heel kick on Moore. Dragon trips up Moore and hits him with multiple kicks to the body and finishes at the head for a near fall. The Ultimo Dragon looks great, despite being out of the ring for several years. The Ultimo Dragon, inventor of the asai moonsault uses the move he invented on Moore. He throws Moore back into the ring for a two count. Moore goes to the top rope, but the Dragon hits a chin buster from the second turnbuckle. The Dragon then hits Moore with an awesome looking move where he flips over from the stunner position and hits inverted DDT for the pin. Great athleticism is showcased in this match. Mysterio came into the ring after the match and raised Ultimo Dragon’s hand in victory.
Six-man tag is next!
(Commercial Break)
7th Quarter Hour
Cole hypes Staind’s song, “Price to Play”, as the theme for Vengeance. Good choice, Staind is a great band.
You suck! You suck! Out comes the greatest wrestler of the new generation, Kurt Angle, to a huge reaction. Next out is Mr. America, who also comes out to a big pop. Here comes the pain! Brock Lesnar makes his way to the ring. Benjamin and Haas (The Best Damn Tag-Team Period) come out to a chorus of boos, followed by the Big Show. I don’t know if they sweetened the sound or not, but the boos were loud.
(Commercial Break)
(6) Big Show & Charlie Haas & Shelton Benjamin defeated Mr. America & Brock Lesnar & Kurt Angle when Big Show choke slammed Mr. America. We come back and all six men are standing in the ring. Cole and Tazz discuss the fact that Hogan is sitting at home collecting a paycheck. A USA chant breaks out and Kurt Angle and Charlie Haas begin the match. Kurt backs him into the corner. Angle takes Haas over his hip into a headlock. They exchange holds on the mat and Haas whips him off the ropes. Angle hits several hip tosses on Benjamin and Haas. Benjamin tags in. Haas and Benjamin hit a double drop kick on Angle, nice move. Cole hypes Benjamin’s amateur wrestling background. Angle hits a nice cross body block on Benjamin and tags in Mr. America. Hogan uses his vast arsenal of punches, kicks, and clotheslines on Benjamin. Brock Lesnar tags in and works over Benjamin.
8th Quarter Hour
Lesnar reverses a kick attempt into a clothesline for a near-fall. Benjamin tags in Haas, but Lesnar hits a press slam on Haas and tags in Mr. America. More of the same from Mr. America. Cole says he looks fired up from the MSG air. Hogan hits a rare suplex on Haas for a near fall. Mr. American tags Lesnar back in and Lesnar takes control, isolating Haas from his partners. Brock hits a nice looking vertical suplex. It has been all Mr. America, Angle, and Lesnar so far.
(Commercial Break) I really hate these breaks in the middle of the match.
Brock and Haas are in the ring when we come back from break. Brock is dominating and goes for the F-5 on Haas, but Benjamin breaks it up. Benjamin leapfrogs Haas and nails Lesnar who is draped over the top rope. Show tags in now that Lesnar is hurt. Good intensity is shown by Show, who hits Lesnar with a chop and steps on his throat. Lesnar takes control and goes for a slam, but Show punches out of it. Lesnar manages to hit a belly to back suplex and both men are laid out. Both men crawl to their feet and tag out to Haas and Angle. Angle takes over and hits a suplex on Benjamin and Haas. Angle eventually gets the ankle lock on Haas but Show breaks it up. Haas and Benjamin put the boots to Angle. Angle ducks a super-kick, which connects on haas. Angle hits a Russian leg sweep on Haas. Mr. America and Show tag in. Mr. America dishes out punches for all. Show avoids the boot. Lesnar and Angle hit the F-5 and angle slam on Benjamin and Haas respectively. Show is up and gets Angle and Lesnar ready for the choke slam. Cool looking choke slam that establishes Show as a monster. Mr. America is waiting for show. Mr. America lays into him with punches and then hits the big boot.
Vince comes out with Zach and throws him down, which distracts Hogan. Vince asks Hogan if he notices anything wrong with Zach Gowen, he kicks Zach in the stomach and announces that the problem with Zach is that he has a stomachache. This allows Show to hit a chokeslam on Mr. America for the three count.
Vince continues to beat on Gowen. Stephanie runs out and covers Zach. She tells Vince to leave Zach alone. Vince says that next week Zach and Stephanie will face The Big Show for Zach’s contract in a handicap match. The Big Show smiles like a new Denny’s opened up next to his house and points at Zach and laughs.
Radican’s reaction: A good show tonight, highlighted by the excellent effort put in by the participants in the main-event. The WWE is doing a great job of pushing the Big Show as an unstoppable monster. Allowing him to chokeslam both Angle and Lesnar goes a long way in showing that he is a credible big man once again I think that the segment between Vince and Zach was fun, but I was a bit disturbed by the interaction between Vince and Stephanie. I don’t think this type of segment belongs in the WWE, especially when Vince discussed the fact that he had in fact deflowered Stephanie. Once the interaction between Vince and Stephanie ended, the segment picked up again and was very well done I thought that the Ultimo Dragon made a great debut in the WWE. He seemed to be a perfect fit for the Cruiserweight Division, despite not being in the ring for several years. I wonder if Orlando Jones will ever get over. If you contrast his buildup, which was zero, to the Ultimo Dragon’s it is easy to see why new talent won’t get over. The WWE has done a poor job with the Basham Brothers and are now off to a similar start with Orlando Jones. The last thing that I hope for is that the WWE does a better job next week explaining why the U.S. Title is important. It seems like the tournament has just been thrown together and is not very important.
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